How can I divorce my husband.

[tb42_50]

I get the impression that people posting here are wasting their time, including me. Is the OP simply wanting to draw traffic or increase their posting count? As people say, not enough information has been given and no replies from the OP responding to questions.

One last try then. OP, what nationality are you and where were you married?

I am Thai and we got married here in Thailand and had the marriage certificate

[tb42_50]

What is your nationality, i am assuming your husband is british?

Yes , my husband is British and I am Thai. we met here in Thailand 11 years ago and got married over 7 years ago

[tb42_50]

Can you get a free consultation with a Lawyer ? that would be best.

If I can get the free consultation , that would be great . Yes, but it's hard here in Thailand.

[tb42_50]

If he is British and has son with him legally, and you are Thai = Expensive and Take Long Time.

If he has resources, he can hire British attorney and make it difficult for you.

Possession of son legally will be difficult to challenge, and all of this will cost you much money and time.

Not easy.

I suggest: contrite, meaningful conversation. Suggest he let you talk to son. Maybe you can convince son to return to you and Thailand.

You ask for advice and suggestions .... but give few details. So hard to offer advice.

Good luck and best wishes.

Thanks, he does let me talk to my son. maybe once or twice a week when he finishes school and get home, usually around midnight or 1am Thai time. I would text him on LINE first to ask the time or if i can talk to my son. But when I asked if he would talk to me, he would say he's busy...

To be honest I feel a bit offended now , it seems like some guys are against Thai women or somehow.

Letting my problem out in public isn't easy and I'm not doing it for getting many replies or attention. If someone would look and they would see that I've been a member on this site for a long while and only have a few numbers.

Thanks for your reply

[tb42_50]

Dear all,

first thing first, I haven't reply since last night because I've been to work and just came back, and many replies were from last night and this morning when i was working.

I realized some might not even believe a word I say here , but anyway thank you for all the replies. The purpose of this post is for seeking for some advise for help if possible.

........

below is more detail of what happened.......

I met my husband 11 years ago here in Thailand and we got married nearly 8 years ago. Our son is 6 years old now. He was born here in Phuket. We always lived in Thailand , only went to UK for holiday a few times over the decade.

nearly 3 years ago we planned to move back to UK and start new life there as a family. The moving time was planned for last year between May-June (2013)

We closed our business and he flew back with our son first and i spent sometimes with my family before moving, also i had to wait for the visa. And he went back first to spend time with his mom

one day I found out about his affair and his plan that he would leave me right after I get to UK and start a job.

I confronted him and 4-5 days after he moved in with her and took our son to her house too. They knew each other many

years back.

anyway, several weeks later they split up and my husband and my son moved out and went back to his mom ( my mother in law)

My visa was on pending because of my husband's financial support documents...

I decided to re apply for family visit visa because then my husband already left our son with his mom and went back to work in another town

my visa ended in 6 months... and he promised he would try to make things better and have family back together again.

The plan then was that i came back and apply for new visa to go back

when I came back , after few weeks . I asked my husband about our plan in UK, moving to new place ,etc and he didn't reply. His mom wrote me a message that she doesn;t want me in her family. he doesn't love me anymore. Her son is better without me, and so on

I told him that it would be a big problem if I go back and have problems with her.... I tried to persuade him to come back but he said he's not ready. and that he doesn't think it's good for me to go back.

few weeks later he emailed me and said he started a relationship with another woman and my son met her already.

...........He also said he doesn't want to come back here for a long time. He will when he's ready

it's been nearly 6 months since i came back.I shipped everything to UK last year. I have to work to earn money and hopefully that would help my situation in one way or another

Thanks for reading through this

[GOLDBUGGY]

Although I do understand your circumstance and reason for obtaining a Divorce, it will not be easy for you since your husband does not live in Thailand and has no intentions (perhaps) of ever coming back. Unless he has a good reason to come back, like property or assets to sell here. But I somehow doubt that he does. If he does the first thing you need to do, if they are not in your name, is to get a hold of them or get them frozen, so he can't sell them behind your back either.

Looking from the outside in, it looks to me like he had a well planned separation from you, but not planned Divorce. It is obvious from your Post that he holds all the assets, although this amount is not clear. If he holds a reasonable amount you might be able to find a lawyer willing to take your case on a Contingency Bases. Meaning he would be willing to handle your case with no money up front and collect a larger share after the Divorce Settlement. But it will not be easy to find such a lawyer as they don't like to work this way and your case would be more difficult and costly. Especially if he doesn't want a Divorce, as you are dealing with someone Overseas. Keep in mind that lawyer who works this way gets nothing, if he loses.

You may be wondering that since he doesn't want to come back and be with you, and he has found someone else, then why would he not want a Divorce that you are asking for. The answers is quite simple My Dear, and it all has to do with him having to lose some money by doing this. Under British Law, and if he were to seek a Divorce in the U.K., he would first have to declare all his assets, which is to tell the Courts about everything he owns and how much money he and you make. From that, and depending on circumstances, they would try to come up with a fare settlement and distribution of assets, which could be as high as 50% and a monthly allowance until you are able to find a job and work also.

As I said, to me it looks like a well planned separation from you. So to answer you question look at it this way. Your Husband holds all the assets including your Son. He perhaps has a decent job in the U.K. and thus the money to. He has a live in Girl Friend who he may be telling it is you who does not want this Divorce. So what could he possibly gain from you more, by going to court and seeking a Divorce from you? Would Zero be the correct answer? But now you know why.

I don't want to discourage you, but I also don't want to lie to you either. From what you have told me, you should be able to obtain your Divorce and also perhaps get some financial settlement to. But having said that, it will be a long uphill climb all the way for you to get that. Now considering that you don't have money to obtain a Lawyer here, it will feel more like an up-mountain climb for you.So it would also be a true test of your determination.

Obtaining Child Custody now would also be very difficult for you. Possession is nine tenths of the law and he has possession of your son. To get him back, if he is not willing to give him to you, is even more difficult than the Divorce Settlement, but also more enforceable if you win. If your Son is happy with him then perhaps the best thing you could do for him is let him stay,

So your first step is to try and find a lawyer who will help you. I can't see you doing this on your own, and getting a fare settlement as well. But I could be totally wrong as I am not a Thai Lawyer.

[ALFREDO]

I do not know, if the OP is a troll, or this is true story, but anyway in my opinion.

How much you love your child, if the father is more or less ok, the child is better off in England regarding schooling and upbringing his whole future all together is better in England.

Maybe you can get another family visit visa and see your son there, but think what is in the interest for the life of your son, not think only what is in your interest.

Edited December 19, 2014 by ALFREDO

[NeverSure]

If you are married to a Thai lady in Thailand ..is it acceptable to have a girlfriend sometimes?

I plead the fifth!

I think you've had too many fifths.

[jacko45k]

If you are married to a Thai lady in Thailand ..is it acceptable to have a girlfriend sometimes?

I plead the fifth!

I think you've had too many fifths.

You and her agree then!

[billd766]

If he is British and has son with him legally, and you are Thai = Expensive and Take Long Time.

If he has resources, he can hire British attorney and make it difficult for you.

Possession of son legally will be difficult to challenge, and all of this will cost you much money and time.

Not easy.

I suggest: contrite, meaningful conversation. Suggest he let you talk to son. Maybe you can convince son to return to you and Thailand.

You ask for advice and suggestions .... but give few details. So hard to offer advice.

Good luck and best wishes.

Thanks, he does let me talk to my son. maybe once or twice a week when he finishes school and get home, usually around midnight or 1am Thai time. I would text him on LINE first to ask the time or if i can talk to my son. But when I asked if he would talk to me, he would say he's busy...

To be honest I feel a bit offended now , it seems like some guys are against Thai women or somehow.

Letting my problem out in public isn't easy and I'm not doing it for getting many replies or attention. If someone would look and they would see that I've been a member on this site for a long while and only have a few numbers.

Thanks for your reply

Many farang men on Thai Visa have been caught by women in general and Thai women in particular as this is Thailand. However many more DO have successful marriages and children with Thai women but those are classed as irrelevant by the whiners, moaners and losers some of whom are replying to this thread.

I can image in part how you feel and it is hard to be without your son.

I too have gone through a divorce but in my case it was my fault and I did my best for my wife and son in the UK.

[gemguy]

It's an affair...yes. but it's been more than 2 women for sure since last year.. so how many more does he needs ? lol

TO be honest, it's been 1 and half year now

If the husband you refer to is living and staying here in Thailand his womanizing ways could easily be an ongoing affair while the other women may also be wondering how to separate from him when he moves onto another new women.

Meantime I believe he could be served with Papers requesting a legal separation or divorce recognized by British law....you would think

How much or how little it would cost you....I can not say.

Cheers.

[jomcondo]

I would like to congratulate your husband on a well planned operation.

he also has enough foresight to not return to thailand where you can snatch the child back.

you lost.

[Sheryl]

A "troll-calling" post has been removed.

OP:

1. Britain does have laws on parental abduction and it might be worth seeking consular advice at the British Embassy. Even if you never obtained UK citizenship you are presumably the mother of a child with British nationality. Discussion with them needs to focus on the custody issue, not getting a divorce which as below, you should be able to easily manage.

2. You should also seek advise from a lawyer with experience in international custody issues. Possibly the Brit Emb could suggest one.

3. Look into lodging a complain with your own Ministry of Foreign Affairs (again, focused on the abduction of the child without your consent).

4. As far as divorcing him goes I think that is not difficult in Thailand and your Ampur can advise you. He will be summoned to appear at the Ampur office but when he doesn't show I think there will be some process whereby you can receive the divorce. Your problem is the child custody.

[nithisa78]

If you are married to a Thai lady in Thailand ..is it acceptable to have a girlfriend sometimes?

You better ask your wife if she can accepted that. You will know the answer.

?

It isn't a good idea, 99.9% of the time.

[GOLDBUGGY]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

A "troll-calling" post has been removed.

OP:

1. Britain does have laws on parental abduction and it might be worth seeking consular advice at the British Embassy. Even if you never obtained UK citizenship you are presumably the mother of a child with British nationality. Discussion with them needs to focus on the custody issue, not getting a divorce which as below, you should be able to easily manage.

2. You should also seek advise from a lawyer with experience in international custody issues. Possibly the Brit Emb could suggest one.

3. Look into lodging a complain with your own Ministry of Foreign Affairs (again, focused on the abduction of the child without your consent).

4. As far as divorcing him goes I think that is not difficult in Thailand and your Ampur can advise you. He will be summoned to appear at the Ampur office but when he doesn't show I think there will be some process whereby you can receive the divorce. Your problem is the child custody.

If she was a UK Citizen, then she would not need a Visa to go their, and as she has already said she did. So the UK Embassy will do very little for her.

A child going on Vacation with his Father, or in this case a permanent move, does not classify as Child Abduction. Child Abduction occurs when a person, other than a Parent or Guardian takes the said child, who is under the age of 14 years, away without permission or authority.

Before any action can take place a Court would first have to determine who should have Custody of the child. If she were to win, and yet he refuses to turn the child over to her, the authorities would take this child and he would be charged with Contempt of Court, and not Child Abduction.If he were to later sneak into Thailand and steal his son from the school playground, without knowledge or permission, that would be Kidnapping.

If all she wanted was a Uncontested Divorce then this should be easy to obtain. But this may mean giving up on all the assets they worked together in the marriage to obtain. She mentioned they had a business together in Thailand that they sold just before he moved away. So why should she give up her half of that? Just so she can get a Divorce?

My Friend! She was asking on how she can get a Divorce, and her Son back, expecting all the whistles and bells that go with it. Not BS!

[Thai at Heart]

The issue is firstly where did you get married.

Thailand or the UK.

[mania]

The issue is firstly where did you get married.

Thailand or the UK.

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/785235-how-can-i-divorce-my-husband/page-2#entry8825461

[Sheryl]

If she was a UK Citizen, then she would not need a Visa to go their, and as she has already said she did. So the UK Embassy will do very little for her

A child going on Vacation with his Father, or in this case a permanent move, does not classify as Child Abduction. Child Abduction occurs when a person, other than a Parent or Guardian takes the said child, who is under the age of 14 years, away without permission or authority.

She is apparently the mother of a UK citizen, who is a minor. So I think it is worth a try, framed in terms of reporting the parental abduction of a UK minor.

You are incorrect re UK child abduction laws. The UK Child Abduction law of 1984 clearly recognized parental abduction as a category of child abduction. Child Abduction, under UK law, is not limited to removal by a person other than parent. Many countries likewise recognize parental abduction as a crime. A parent cannot legally remove a child without the consent of the other parent unless s/he has been awarded sole awarded by a court, which is evidentally not the case here.

OP: while primarily focused on helping parents whose child has been removed from the UK, rather than to it, I suggest you try contacting this organization in the UK http://www.pact-online.org/ As regards assets, under Thai law to my understanding you are entitled to half. Again, this is something your Ampur an advise you on. Though if your husband has taken your assets out of the country with him, getting your share may be problematic.

[redandyellow]

I don't have the answers about the pending divorce, but do keep as stress-free as you can in the interim, with exercise, other relaxation things like deep breathing, which helps anxiety, have a good diet, and avoid alcohol.

All the best

[GOLDBUGGY]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

If she was a UK Citizen, then she would not need a Visa to go their, and as she has already said she did. So the UK Embassy will do very little for her

A child going on Vacation with his Father, or in this case a permanent move, does not classify as Child Abduction. Child Abduction occurs when a person, other than a Parent or Guardian takes the said child, who is under the age of 14 years, away without permission or authority.

She is apparently the mother of a UK citizen, who is a minor. So I think it is worth a try, framed in terms of reporting the parental abduction of a UK minor.

You are incorrect re UK child abduction laws. The UK Child Abduction law of 1984 clearly recognized parental abduction as a category of child abduction. Child Abduction, under UK law, is not limited to removal by a person other than parent. Many countries likewise recognize parental abduction as a crime. A parent cannot legally remove a child without the consent of the other parent unless s/he has been awarded sole awarded by a court, which is evidentally not the case here.

OP: while primarily focused on helping parents whose child has been removed from the UK, rather than to it, I suggest you try contacting this organization in the UK http://www.pact-online.org/ As regards assets, under Thai law to my understanding you are entitled to half. Again, this is something your Ampur an advise you on. Though if your husband has taken your assets out of the country with him, getting your share may be problematic.

So what you are saying then that a Parent cannot legally remove a child without the other Parents consent. So if I decided to take my boy fishing, and the wife didn't agree, I could have Police waiting for me when I came back and charged with Child Abduction?

I don't think so My Friend.

Besides! Who ever said she did not give him permission to take her Son? Haven't you noticed that it is only you who says that?

Read the Ops Post! She said they sold their business as they planned to move to the UK and her Husband and Son went first, (as he is a UK Citizen) while she waited for her UK Visa and tied up lose ends. Nobody ever says he was abducted.

And FYI, in case you don't know this as well, most Embassies won't lift a finger to help you when you are a citizen of that Embassy, in another country, and really need it. Or offer very limited help.

So what help do you expect them to give her when there is no crime committed and she is not a UK Citizen? To perhaps provide a Thai Lawyer who speaks English, which she does not need and surely cant afford right now?

[Boon Mee]

I get the impression that people posting here are wasting their time, including me. Is the OP simply wanting to draw traffic or increase their posting count? As people say, not enough information has been given and no replies from the OP responding to questions.

Got that right. Sometimes it's amazing how much traffic can be generated by these Trolls.

Miss the days when Dirty Dog would mosie on in here and wind up george & Dr. Pat Pong!

[Sheryl]

So what you are saying then that a Parent cannot legally remove a child without the other Parents consent. So if I decided to take my boy fishing, and the wife didn't agree, I could have Police waiting for me when I came back and charged with Child Abduction?..

Obviously taking a child fishing is not the same as moving away permanently with the child to another place.

The child has been physically removed from his mother, 24/7, since last March. Hardly analogous to a "fishing trip". And yes, it does qualify as parental abduction since the intent and effect has been to change where the child lives against the other parent's wishes.

[mania]

So what you are saying then that a Parent cannot legally remove a child without the other Parents consent. So if I decided to take my boy fishing, and the wife didn't agree, I could have Police waiting for me when I came back and charged with Child Abduction?..

Obviously taking a child fishing is not the same as moving away permanently with the child to another place.

The child has been physically removed from his mother, 24/7, since last March. Hardly analogous to a "fishing trip". And yes, it does qualify as parental abduction since the intent and effect has been to change where the child lives against the other parent's wishes.

Yes I am from the USA & to travel with a minor Internationally requires both parents consent.

I am not sure about UK laws but I would be surprised if something similar doesn't exist

Letter of Consent for International Travel

The U.S. Department of State suggests that a parent who plans to travel abroad without the child's other parent obtain a letter of consent. The entry and departure requirements for travelers often vary from one airport to another and from one destination to another. Under some circumstances, an airline employee or immigration official may ask to see signed consent from the child's other parent before allowing a child to leave the country.

Consequences of Travel without Parental Consent

If a divorced parent takes a child out of the country without the other parent's consent, the other parent may be able to open an international parental child abduction case. The U.S. Department of State handles international child kidnapping through the Office of Children's Issues. In addition, a custodial parent may need to file a local police report and ask law enforcement to enter the minor's information into the National Crime Information Center, a federal database. The parent may also benefit from consulting with a family law attorney about enforcing the custody terms of the divorce decree.

Edited December 22, 2014 by mania

[khunpaul1962]

So what you are saying then that a Parent cannot legally remove a child without the other Parents consent. So if I decided to take my boy fishing, and the wife didn't agree, I could have Police waiting for me when I came back and charged with Child Abduction?..

Obviously taking a child fishing is not the same as moving away permanently with the child to another place.

The child has been physically removed from his mother, 24/7, since last March. Hardly analogous to a "fishing trip". And yes, it does qualify as parental abduction since the intent and effect has been to change where the child lives against the other parent's wishes.

Yes I am from the USA & to travel with a minor Internationally requires both parents consent.

I am not sure about UK laws but I would be surprised if something similar doesn't exist

Letter of Consent for International Travel

The U.S. Department of State suggests that a parent who plans to travel abroad without the child's other parent obtain a letter of consent. The entry and departure requirements for travelers often vary from one airport to another and from one destination to another. Under some circumstances, an airline employee or immigration official may ask to see signed consent from the child's other parent before allowing a child to leave the country.

Consequences of Travel without Parental Consent

If a divorced parent takes a child out of the country without the other parent's consent, the other parent may be able to open an international parental child abduction case. The U.S. Department of State handles international child kidnapping through the Office of Children's Issues. In addition, a custodial parent may need to file a local police report and ask law enforcement to enter the minor's information into the National Crime Information Center, a federal database. The parent may also benefit from consulting with a family law attorney about enforcing the custody terms of the divorce decree.

I have traveled two times to the states with my son 4 years old without his mother and without the mother's consent. Without any problem the last time in June of this year.

Edited December 23, 2014 by khunpaul1962

[mania]

I have traveled two times to the states with my son 4 years old without his mother and without the mother's consent. Without any problem the last time in June of this year.

I do not think it is a problem & we are free to do so....

In other words It is not something scanned for....

But if the other parent comes forward with the claim

then the problem begins & so does the follow up.

Especially so in the US

Edited December 23, 2014 by mania

[Sheryl]

Airline and immigration staff can, at anytime, ask to see proof that the other parent consents. They do not always do so, but they can. That someone has succeeded in taking children abroad without consent of the other parent in the past does not mean they will succeed in future, anymore than having exceeded the speed limit undetected in the past means you won't get stopped next time.

(I trust that doesn't khunpaul meant he has traveled without an proof of his wife's consent,not that he has actually taken the child against the mother's wishes or without her knowledge....).

[NancyL]

Indeed, there are laws to this effect and it's just a good idea when one parent is traveling internationally with a child to have documentation that the other parent is in agreement, especially a man traveling with alone with small children. My brother always did this when traveling with his daughters, and they are not mixed race. But, the youngest was sometimes given to temper tantrums where she would create public scenes yelling things like "you're not really my father/mother" when she wasn't getting her way. (Fortunately she outgrew that phase about 15 years ago and now is well-adjusted.)

Edited December 25, 2014 by NancyL

[HCB]

Sad to hear this case , much more sad is a kid , this reason why i am still single and happy for my status. Although sometimes i am lonely.

[dbrenn]

If he doesn't want a divorce, the only way to get a divorce is if you go to court. You can do that in Thailand, as that is where you got married and where you live.

Agreed. The OP can get a court order for a divorce in Thailand on the grounds that her husband has abandoned her, moved overseas, and no longer supports her.

[nevets]

The husband is not allowed to take a child out of Thailand without the written permission of the mother if he is going alone.

She could state he went without permission if that was so and the law would help get him back.

As for the divorce after 3 yrs she can go to court and get one , in Thailand as he has deserted her and committed adultery.