How to Catch a Cheater?

[lust]

how do you know when your Thai GF is lying?

Her mouth is open

Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Everything that goes into her mouth is a dick.

[how241]

Once the trust is gone, its over mate, dont waste anymore time or heartache, start again.

+1...You probably already know the truth but your looking for some confirmation to throw in her face. In the end, you'll only suffer more so just move on.

[maynard420]

I know a few private detectives in Pattaya and BKK or wherever you are they will come and they are very good at what they do, cost about 8,000 baht, it can be more, they will track her and also get all records from the mobile carrier, it can be done, I have used it also, just drop me a message.

Best Regards.

Jay.

[georgemandm]

Thai woman are like mangos on a mango tree just geat a new mango of the tree , why waste your time on her .

[kennypowers]

Call the number already.

[BigC]

I suspect my Thai GF is cheating on me because of a received text, in English, apologizing for missing her calls. No phone records of the calls. Recently there were several calls back and forth a couple of hours before she was supposedly with her sister; arriving to see me late. For personal reasons, I want to make certain she really is cheating before breaking up with her. How can I do that? I don't have time to follow her around all day.

Suspicious but not sackable

Nothing sexual in the SMS

Maybe she does know people that she speaks to in english maybe she is cheating but there is not enough to prove she is cheating

I would look into it though

Forget all these other people there advise is rubbish

Not trusting someone and finding something suspicious is not the same

She might be cheating she might not

I would defiantly look into it

[Don Aleman]

Thai girls don't call that "cheating", it is just "doing business. What do you call your philandering ? Physical therapy !

[mercman24]

what a brilliant idea, nicking her sim card, of course i have no need of this, as i am madly in love with myself.

[Nowisee]

The oldest trick in the book. You confront her, ask her to show you her phone call and text and LINE and whatever message history of all the people in her contacts.
IF she refuses, she might be guilty of being less than honest with you...or she might just be highly offended.
or, you can do some kinesics interview techniques on her and if you suspect she is being less than honest...shitcan her and write it off on lesson learned.

[Loptr]

Don't dump her, just cheat back.

Cheating is a Thai national pastime, good for all ages and all social classes.

Then why have a GF in the first place? Better to just have a few giks that you don't really care about, other than sanook... This western concept of fidelity really is overrated...

[Morakot]

Why not just ask her what's going on?

Edited January 8, 2015 by Morakot

[Nemesis7]

Move on...since you already lost trust on her. Simply tell her it must end cause its not working, its simple.

[thejcb]

Just ask her straight, If she doesnt answer she is cheating on you and if her lips start to move then she is lying !

[luckylefty]

Like a lot of the other sensible answers, I'd have to agree that if you can't trust her then it's already pretty much over.
It might be hard to accept but the easiest way to move on is to get fresh and go out and look for another. There are way too many
beautiful and intelligent women out there, considering you don't pick up at the red light.

[Gecko123]

Thai woman are like mangos on a mango tree just geat a new mango of the tree , why waste your time on her .

You need to be hit in the head with a mango, preferably a nice hard unripe one.

[uptheos]

OP, if you found the texts and calls...........She is cheating you.

What do you expect? A written confession?

Just say Bye Bye politely...........and kick her out.

Plenty of gorgeous chicks around.

If you have trouble finding a new one.......I can spare one or two of mine..............

Retrieving foot in the process

[smotherb]

As a former private detective, (or like others in this thread .. as a person with common sense) it comes down to this.

The truth is a chain and one need not break all the links to render it useless ... just one.

When Thai's are caught in a lie, they answer questions ... with questions. Almost in a childish and very transparent way.

Do not play this game ... it goes no where fast.

Instead, sit down and explain that "we come from different cultures and I try hard to respect yours ... now you are going to respect mine. My culture is truth driven and we value positive partnerships based on the truth. i know in your culture you do not like yes or no questions, but this is the easy way to get to where we need to be if we are going to be happy together."

Show her the text messages, look her in the eye and ask her, yes or no, do you know who these are from? If she says no, trust your instincts and decide if in your heart, you beleive her. (Never discount the power of your "Lizard Brain" to know when it hears a lie ... just trust me on this ... it is reality. (She will look away, she will swallow hard, her cheeks or neck with flush, she will tighten her body...etc)

When she is done say, "This is easy to solve, show me your phone, text messages and call logs." Period, full stop. Any hesitation and you have your answer. My GF leaves her phone around, no password, and often leaves the house without it. She has full access to mine and is free to use it anytime. We do not have these issues.

But once we did. She got a text from an old flame, I said "<deleted> is this" and she told me the truth. I said, OK ... fair enough, if you really do not want him writing let me help you write the reply. She instantly opened the phone and his contact information. I smiled and said, "Never mind, i am sure you can handle this." The rest is history and I trust her 98% of the time. (Sorry, that is about as high as it can get "Ashes to ashes and dust to dust, show me a woman a man can trust.")

Then ask her where she went the other night and have her begin at the house and explain the day until she got home.

Take notes.

Now, ask her to tell the story again, beginning from when she got home and going backwards.

Liars can not do this, they require a logical sequence, where a truth teller simply needs to remember ... the truth.

Why you do not just sit down with a mate, explain the story, call from his phone and see who the F this is is a mystery to me. Or not, because .... you may not want to know. Better yet, if you have a woman friend to make the call, "Do you remember meeting me, I want to see you" Mr Wonderful will be more than happy to furnish her with his life story and even arrange a meeting.

You had me until, "My culture is truth driven . . . "

[otocheater]

Cheating is nasty thing ever. If you dont love her more than yourself just walk away. But if you love her more than anything in the world just kill her.

P.S. If you find out she is cheated, please dont cheat back otherwise you will look even more disgusting.

?

[Smurkster]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Don't dump her, just cheat back.
Cheating is a Thai national pastime, good for all ages and all social classes.

Then why have a GF in the first place? Better to just have a few giks that you don't really care about, other than sanook... This western concept of fidelity really is overrated...

it's not overrated to the partner that ISNT cheating and has put time in effort into a relationship only to have the other one flush that down the toilet with their infidelity....

[Morakot]

if you love her more than anything in the world just kill her

...and go straight to prison.

Edited January 8, 2015 by Morakot

[smotherb]

You came for an advice here on toxic thai visa forum,where 90% of guys are dating bar girls?

And you pulled that out of your <deleted> exactly how ?

I was thinking that was a conservative estimate

[smotherb]

how do you know when your Thai GF is lying?

Her mouth is open

Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Everything that goes into her mouth is a dick.

Vulgar and impossible

[KhnomKhnom]

"Cheating" is a deep label error. What people like to call "cheating" is just temporary sexual experimentation. If the partner, woman or man, comes home, takes care of the home and partner, and does not throw money away, the best advice is to FORGET ABOUT IT.

If the partner does not come home, etc., then it is time to confront the beginning of the end of the relationship because the experimentation has turned into habit and the preferred life...... that is not with you, the existing partner.

There are many signs to suspect that a woman is having a sexual fling...... buying new and sexy underwear and clothes, using perfume and make up more, watching her weight and going to hair dresser more often. Too, there will be otherwise unexplained absences that she dismisses lightly as a trip to the wat or to family/gf. She goes directly into a bath upon coming home. If she is determined to make a real permanent break, she will be squirreling away money in a hidden account and making sure "her stuff" is in her name. Look at her closet to see if lots less of hers is in there. She may have a close gf who is divorced to give her tips.

Now, if you just can not forget about it and live and let live.... Here are some steps, but YOU must do them--if you do not want to take this trouble, then back to the condition called "forget about it."

-if she says she is going to the wat, shopping, bar, hairdresser..... go with her; do not leave her side for a minute and observe if she appears angry of disturbed.

-encourage her to use GrabTaxi and then track her movements by the app that comes with GrabTaxi.

-use her telephone often and watch her reactions.

-if you speak Thai or can get a trusted translator, find her worst enemy (usually jealousy) and pay the enemy to tell you what is happening and to watch her and report.

Do not hire a Thai citizen private investigator; he has no professional ethics and will approach her and make a deal with her to pay him off her case. That way the P.I. gets money from her, reports no problems to you, and takes your money, too. SOP.

Especially in cases of older man/younger woman, we should expect sexual experimentation from time to time. The temptations are huge and the culture is relaxed about it, if very secretive. A woman hits age 40 and may feel life and good times are over for her unless she grabs some fast-disappearing fun (same hits men). If she is wise, she will take a wild run around, and then settle down to her old man who she really knows is best for her.... and for her family. Good luck to all.

[otocheater]

if you love her more than anything in the world just kill her

...and go straight to prison.

No need to go to jail if OP is clever enaugh.

555

?

[KhnomKhnom]

"Cheating" is a deep label error. What people like to call "cheating" is just temporary sexual experimentation. If the partner, woman or man, comes home, takes care of the home and partner, and does not throw money away, the best advice is to FORGET ABOUT IT.

If the partner does not come home, etc., then it is time to confront the beginning of the end of the relationship because the experimentation has turned into habit and the preferred life...... that is not with you, the existing partner.

There are many signs to suspect that a woman is having a sexual fling...... buying new and sexy underwear and clothes, using perfume and make up more, watching her weight and going to hair dresser more often. Too, there will be otherwise unexplained absences that she dismisses lightly as a trip to the wat or to family/gf. She goes directly into a bath upon coming home. If she is determined to make a real permanent break, she will be squirreling away money in a hidden account and making sure "her stuff" is in her name. Look at her closet to see if lots less of hers is in there. She may have a close gf who is divorced to give her tips.

Now, if you just can not forget about it and live and let live.... Here are some steps, but YOU must do them--if you do not want to take this trouble, then back to the condition called "forget about it."

-if she says she is going to the wat, shopping, bar, hairdresser..... go with her; do not leave her side for a minute and observe if she appears angry of disturbed.

-encourage her to use GrabTaxi and then track her movements by the app that comes with GrabTaxi.

-use her telephone often and watch her reactions.

-if you speak Thai or can get a trusted translator, find her worst enemy (usually jealousy) and pay the enemy to tell you what is happening and to watch her and report.

Do not hire a Thai citizen private investigator; he has no professional ethics and will approach her and make a deal with her to pay him off her case. That way the P.I. gets money from her, reports no problems to you, and takes your money, too. SOP.

Especially in cases of older man/younger woman, we should expect sexual experimentation from time to time. The temptations are huge and the culture is relaxed about it, if very secretive. A woman hits age 40 and may feel life and good times are over for her unless she grabs some fast-disappearing fun (same hits men). If she is wise, she will take a wild run around, and then settle down to her old man who she really knows is best for her.... and for her family. Good luck to all.

Get a Thai to translate her Facebook and Tweets.

[Morakot]

if you love her more than anything in the world just kill her

...and go straight to prison.

No need to go to jail if OP is clever enaugh.

The OP doesn't sound so clever as he appears unable to communicate with her.

Also you sound like a person without any morals.

[csabo]

Once the trust is gone, its over mate, dont waste anymore time or heartache, start again.

This is the best answer but it does not include how you should leave. If it was me, I would just disappear one day and let her wonder forever. To a women that is the worst torture.

[Serendipity24]

If she's giving reasons like "I have to meet my sister" or "My friend is very sick/drunk and I need to help her" or "My friend broke up w her bf...need me to go see her" then something is fishy!!

I was in a group of Thai girls before and they gave me some 411 on how the game is played:s

Try telling her that you have a friend who got cheated by his gf...see her reaction.

Edited January 8, 2015 by Serendipity24

[timendres]

Don't dump her, just cheat back.

Cheating is a Thai national pastime, good for all ages and all social classes.

Some organization did a study once to determine which nationalities cheated the most.

#1 cheaters in the world -- Thai Men! (any surprise?)

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.

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#2 -- Thai women. Any guesses as to why?

[A1Str8]

There are 8 women to every 1 man in Thailand. If you are concerned then your feelings are probably correct.

1 Down 7 to go I say!

This one! If you are in doubt, that probably happens for a reason.

Tell her that if she can't be honest with you, you are leaving her. Don't watch what she says, it doesn't matter. Watch her reaction. You should be able to tell if she's lying. Or record it and post it. I am gonna tell you if she's being honest or not. Thai women are transparent. Somebody should teach them how to lie properly.