How To Understand Farang Nature...

[noy9000]

Thank you Noy. You have proved that bigotry comes in all shapes, colors and sizes and from all countries.

I'm not positive, but, pretty sure. Bigotry is worst in America. Want examples?

The man on top ask which racial sub-group I'm from, than farang prince says I'm a racist (somehow). Irony.

I'm chinese. I don't speak Thai that well, but, wanna bet on my prospect in relationship than the farangs? Okay, you used 'some of' - so - it's far I can say I've more prospect than the majority. Unless you are counting money in your relationships, I really don't think so.

But than again, I'm doing well in the financial department.

Hmmm Noy .... So you are pretty much limited to Thais that speak Chinese. <I am limited to Thais that speak Thai. or English I guess>

No there was NO IRONY in my question at all since this whole thread is about race. Farang being a term to describe white westerners. There is CERTAINLY no irony involved when you decide to not only bring race but nationality in it Farang Prince did NOT call you a racist ... he called you a bigot They are different things! But ... would I bet on your prospects for a relationship? No! If I did it would be without knowing you as more than a bigot that claims to be a 23 y/o doctor! Not enough info! Also not enough info based upon not knowing who you are attracted to! That being said you are likely at some severe disadvantages being ethnically Chinese from Singapore. Lots of family expectations and race/gender issues there in family issues! <That is solely a generalization since I don't know your family > As for your prospects versus mine .... well if you are single now ... I'll take that bet! and would have been able to beat you for the ast few years

Anyways ... you really can drop the anti-American rant ... it is tired !

Certainly something we can expect from Americans.

I really don't think I'm wrong to classify Americans apart from other farangs. Many occidentals will go "stupid americans" too. It's true. Ugly Americans are much more typical than Wise ones especially in Thailand, and, it's always a good thing to skip the potential landmines (which is why I said skipping americans, anyone English will be nice). Bigot, I am. Bigot, you are. Honestly, who isn't?

There're many types of doctors, family (just as you were saying). The past few years isn't a good representative, I'm was in countless one night stands (in Bangkok, Singapore & New Jersey) although there's no signs of stopping yet. But I think it's true there's a limit in thai guys whom I'm willing to date. I can be picky with the options that I have. As far as I'm concern, Asians have a distinctive advantage (if they do blend in) of being themselves without much expectations of keeping up social status (I think I look fine in my usual academic best), &, not alway having to make the first move.

Most of the time I'll always get hitched in local bars, it wouldn't be fair to put us on competition. I can speak Thai but not as fluent as I'd hoped (I can't write), with sufficient practice I'll blend in.

It has been off-topic enough. My recommendation is still to stay away from Americans, but, consider other farangs from any of the other nations. =)

Edited August 28, 2006 by noy9000

[jdinasia]

Noy ! NOW I UNDERSTAND! ........

You were in New Jersey! But everything in your post above changed your previous statements. Above you stopped talking about relationships and started talking about ONS's. <as I guess you had to, since on the relationship thing you had already lost :)That would be due to this American already being in a relationship.

And you completely missed the point of your <again potential liabilities ... since I do not know if your family situation is 'typical'> liabilities of being an ethically Chinese Singaporean, when it comes to having an open long term relationship with a man! 'Typical' Chinese families from Singapore have very high expectations that their sons will marry and have children and can bring LOTS of pressure to ber to achieve this!

So, that leaves only one question. What happened in New Jersey and Bangkok that so turned you off Americans? Did you find in the USA that most young cute white guys were only interested in other young cute white guys? That would be a very normal thing there! (the same as in Asia ... the young cute guys are typically only interested in the other guys that come from their same racial background!) What about the Americans in Bangkok? How did they hurt you? Seems like you would pull more of them if you wanted to just due to language considerations!

I am kind of sad for you on two points ... that at 23 you have had "countless" ONS's. The other reason is that you missed the point that it wasn't your limits of being willing to date thais that was the discussion you brought up but the Thai's willingness to date you

[jdinasia]

Great first post Trouble! Welcome to Thai Visa and the gay People in Thailand sub-forum!

[PeaceBlondie]

Yes, Trouble, great first post.

Uhh, concerning long term relationships, Americans who have countless one-night stands are to be avoided.

[jdinasia]

as would any nationality ... Singaporean .... German ... Thai ... etc as nauseum

[Trouble]

Noy, It would seem that you have had one or more very bad experiences with one or more Americans. I am sorry about that. At 23 you seemed to have formed very negative opinions about us. There isn't much I can do about that as your opinions come from your experience. I will tell you this. Thais, Chinese, Germans, French, et al can play just as many games as Americans. Do you think other groups do not play games? What planet have you been on? I know a young Chinese guy from KL who fell in love with an English guy and left everything to go off with him. The English guy turned cold on him in 4 months. This young Chinese guy is a dream come true. He wants loyalty, honesty, and a long term commitment. He is devastated by the experience. He has already formed some impressions of the English which he will carry with him a long time. In his case he has lived in America and desparately wants to return there. My point is not in saying that ALL English are that way but that you meet this type of sh*thead in any nationality or ethnic group. So please give it a break. When you are around long enough you will soon find that you will have both good and bad experiences with any group. You are a professional, do you really think making generalizations as you have is educated thinking?

Further, get a grip. You are young 23, professional, financially secure or so you have said. If so, sure you can probably pick up anything you want, for a night. Anyone can do that. Hookups are easy as all one has to do is get on the internet. You talk a pretty good story now but I want to see what you are doing in 40 years. I am 60, in good shape, financially secure and have found that I am getting more interest now than when I was younger. I am going to Nation VI and going to dance my ass off and have a great time. If you can believe it (which you probably can't since I am American and old), I have already got some SG boys looking to meet me. So you enjoy your youth and arrogance while you can. It is really easy to get one night stands, when the time comes I sincerely hope you meet some guy (of whatever nationality) with which you can have a great relationship. Life is way too short to place barriers in front of yourself. When you see someone in the gym and are attracted to him does he first have to pass your nationality test? Take a chance based on the individual not his nationality. We Americans are not all bad although I have met a few that I would easy like to see in the trash dump, but then I have met people like that everywhere. Just lighten up a little and you will find life much more enjoyable.

[TopChinese]

As a fellow Singaporean (or Sgboy for that matter), I have my suspicions about Noy.

He is certainly not a doctor trained in Singapore since medicine here involves at least 6 years of medical undergraduate education from 18yo, on top of the housemanship requirements and national service obligations. Most doctors here are only qualified at 26.

There are also some words in his posts which are quite archaic and unusual, eg "occidentals", "Thailanders" etc. No self-respecting Singaporean would admit to "not keeping up social status" and looking good in those gaudy academic robes. Troll alert.

Doubts aside, this Singaporean boy has always taken an open approach towards people in general and not holding their place of birth/maturity(if any)/penis sizes against them. There are already so many issues and misconceptions to deal with when you meet someone new. Why would you let a label keep you from having a good time?

JD, hope your opinion about SGboys won't hinder you from accepting a drink from one at @Richards sometime..

Trouble, you look like trouble.... I like trouble. Can i gt to knoe u bettr?

Edited August 29, 2006 by TopChinese

[noy9000]

There are also some words in his posts which are quite archaic and unusual, eg "occidentals", "Thailanders" etc. No self-respecting Singaporean would admit to "not keeping up social status" and looking good in those gaudy academic robes. Troll alert.

Choice of words really depend on the group of people you mix with. Social status etc. Okay, I'm old school. I hate to mention about social status thing, but, I'm sure you know how things are like in Thailand. I do know how to behave myself. There's a thing about looking good in the decent way because of the circle of friends I've here - not that I mind really!

The problem could probably (in my experience) that being western influenced, we have a different values - unless you're talking about dating Thais (possibly from bars) who are from the 'lower' social class (I really don't group, but, it's a descriptive term). That'll be different.

Back to the topic.

That isn't a problem with me & the Thais in the dating department. I've many options, but, I'm particular picky about some stuff.

I don't know - I know too many Americans. Once they come into Thailand, they become different, typically ugly americans (as we would call them). I really don't know why - they're just different. Long time residents can be different too. especially if they're old, there's a need for stability & also to settle down.

I suspect the anger has got to be with that - this is a forum with more long term residents (after all, it's expats). And the majority of the Americans out there are landmines to begin with.

[Trouble]

Thanks guys, I am new to this forum but have been coming to Thailand since I served in Vietnam in 1972 so I have lots of experiences. My knowledge comes nowhere near what you guys living there might have, but it does serve as a certain perspective. I have been fortunate to meet, and consider friends, many Thais over the years. And yes I have had a few long distance relationships with Thai men (not an easy thing to do). I have seen it all good and bad. That is why I really find gay men more alike than different. We really are a world wide community. So as I post in this forum I hope you all will take my comments for what they are worth - only one guy's perspective on things.

TopChinese I can be trouble and I can be a lamb very easily led to the slaughter. Careful with me as I can bite back. With that being said, you can buy me a drink anytime, I will be in Thailand in October.

Noy, I want to apologize for my somewhat terse comments but you certainly raised my blood pressure with the stay away from Americans comments. Reading your last post is more enlightening to me as it appears that you seem to have a problem with the American expat more so than Americans in general. I certainly can understand what you maybe be relating about. I think that you must understand that many farang (of any nationality) come to Thailand when they are older because they have worked and are able to retire and live less expensively and maybe enjoy a better life in Thailand. Unfortunately some of these farang whether straight or gay are interested only in serving their libido. They don't want committments, they are butterflies. Others maybe looking for that ltr that they never had at home and quite often that is with someone much younger. Any older man that thinks for a second because of his age, financial status, education, he can dominate the Thai and be successful in the relationship is foolish. That will eventually lead to failure. I certainly have seen the ugly American in Thailand and felt embarassed about it. But I have also seen the abusive German, Brit, French, etc. as well. I have heard discussion where men are so vulgar as to assume any Thai is available for a price. I have heard them discussing all sorts of issues from the prices of drinks in a bar to why somethings don't work in Thailand as well as their home country. There sometimes is a tendency to gripe about everything no matter how petty. So yes I can understand from your point of view if your experience with older gay Americans seems a bit jaded. I personally have a Canadian friend whose company I enjoy at times here in America when we meet socially but quite honestly I won't hang out with him in Thailand because I find him vulgar and crude. I had my 60th birthday party in Bangkok last February at a nice restaurant but did not invite him as I knew he would embarass me in front of my Thai friends because he can't get his mind out of the gutter. Your experience is your reality but as you have spent time in America you certainly cannot believe that all Americans are that way. I really hope that you can meet some of us who do visit Thailand and who live there that can change your perspective somewhat. Honestly, I can see your perspective but again I would ask that you don't make that generalization about every American you come across in Thailand.

[boybrat]

There are also some words in his posts which are quite archaic and unusual, eg "occidentals", "Thailanders" etc. No self-respecting Singaporean would admit to "not keeping up social status" and looking good in those gaudy academic robes. Troll alert.

Choice of words really depend on the group of people you mix with. Social status etc. Okay, I'm old school. I hate to mention about social status thing, but, I'm sure you know how things are like in Thailand. I do know how to behave myself. There's a thing about looking good in the decent way because of the circle of friends I've here - not that I mind really!

The problem could probably (in my experience) that being western influenced, we have a different values - unless you're talking about dating Thais (possibly from bars) who are from the 'lower' social class (I really don't group, but, it's a descriptive term). That'll be different.

Back to the topic.

That isn't a problem with me & the Thais in the dating department. I've many options, but, I'm particular picky about some stuff.

oh boy. why dont u just shut it. topchinese was right....are u SURE u are a doctor from singapore??? cos at 23...u are wayyyy too young to be one and earning that sum.

let see: in singapore you'll end junior college at 18.

then you join the army for 2 years, so you are in the army between 19-20. so ull leave the army at around 21....

and then ull enter the uni, do yr housemanship, etc etc.....for your doctors course...hmmmm...doesnt quite add up does it?????

btw, perhaps mummy didnt tell u that its very COMMON to announce to strangers the amount u earn every month. its in extremely bad taste. its just not done and shows your breeding. when i had a partner a loooonnnggg time ago, we never did tell each other how much we earned. its personal. it tacky to reveal to people how much u earn. tacky tacky tacky.

then there's something about yr english that isnt quite right.true true. and u said that u are a what... doctor?? tsk. and u scored in yr a-level gp with THAT level of written english? tsk.tsk. tsk.

i dun know bro. theres something about yr posts that is not congruent to the behaviour of the boys where u say u are from...

and trust me honey, in bkk...i dont know any 23 year old sg doctors. why??? cos my frens would have already told me or i would have already met u at the pool parties/bed supperclub/cafe4.hehhehehe!

PB: but one nite stands are so fun and convenient!

Edited August 30, 2006 by boybrat

[jdinasia]

As a fellow Singaporean (or Sgboy for that matter), I have my suspicions about Noy.

He is certainly not a doctor trained in Singapore since medicine here involves at least 6 years of medical undergraduate education from 18yo, on top of the housemanship requirements and national service obligations. Most doctors here are only qualified at 26.

There are also some words in his posts which are quite archaic and unusual, eg "occidentals", "Thailanders" etc. No self-respecting Singaporean would admit to "not keeping up social status" and looking good in those gaudy academic robes. Troll alert.

Doubts aside, this Singaporean boy has always taken an open approach towards people in general and not holding their place of birth/maturity(if any)/penis sizes against them. There are already so many issues and misconceptions to deal with when you meet someone new. Why would you let a label keep you from having a good time?

JD, hope your opinion about SGboys won't hinder you from accepting a drink from one at @Richards sometime..

Trouble, you look like trouble.... I like trouble. Can i gt to knoe u bettr?

TC ....

Should we happen to be in BKK at the same time I'd be happy to stand you a drink! My issues with Sgguys are certainly open to fluid adjustment! <as we have several acquaintances in common> I wouldn't seek out a SG'er to date ... but if one fell in my lap <so to speak> ... I just wouldn't seek one out to date << as pointed out before ... I live in Thailand ... why would I?>>

If you end up in Phuket for Nation i'll certainly be around! (plus the last day of Nation starts the Phuket Vegetarian Festival!)