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Posted

Inevitably, "marriage" to a Thai National must occasionally surface here. My marriage to my Thai wife evolved like this:

We got married in 2003. We stayed in my home country together until 2011, then I reached my retirement age and moved to Thailand. My wife to follow me at her discretion.

- Here is the thing: Wife earns 15 times the amount in form of wages as she would in Thailand (lower management position). This is not a printing error.

As she is a "workaholic" she could not live in rural Thailand anymore, swinging in the hammock and watching "soap operas" all day. According to her, Thailand is not a desirable place to live, as long as there are better alternatives. No kidding!

I, on the other hand, have no desire to return to my home country where a pack of cigarettes costs 300 Bht in the meantime. (Just to pick an example).

We Skype weekly. We are in complete agreement with the situation. If she needs me, I will be there. If I need her, she will be here. No hokus-pokus necessary, since we are financially on an equal level (according to my accountant).

A perfect marriage, especially since we feel no urge to engage "Private Detectives" to find out what we are doing in our spare time.biggrin.png

Cheers.

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Posted (edited)

Shouldn't married people be living together?

I don't think any of us has the right to say "should" - if an arrangement suits the individuals concerned, why might they not do what they want just because it's slightly unconventional?

I know plenty of couples where HE goes overseas to work and SHE stays at home - this is just a variation on that theme and i find it refreshing that it works and I'm not too cynical to believe it cannot!

Good Luck Mr & Mrs Swissie

Edited by VBF
Posted

So, OP.... how much does a lower management position pay in Thailand?

My gf is a higher level admin assistant and she earns 40k a month.

So, let's say a lower management position commands the same salary in Thailand, we are looking at 600,000 baht a month.

Well, you either are out of touch wish salaries in Thailand, or your wife makes as much as much as a senior Harris defense contractor that I know.

Waiting for an answer to this perhaps bragging thread?

Posted

If it works for you, then great. Every couple is probably different kn many ways.

Personally, I didnt get married to live on the opposite side of the world to my wife.

If I felt or "we" felt that was acceptable I would consider it a major problem and possibly the beginning of the end.

Posted (edited)

Shouldn't married people be living together?

It helps especially if you want to indulge in sexual relations with one another.

Which is one of many factors of marriage is it not.

Edited by stoneyboy
Posted

Shouldn't married people be living together?

I think thats the basic idea, of being Married. How can you be called married if you live apart,married means joined i think.

Posted

Don't worry about it. You'll have kicked the bucket soon enough if you are still smoking into retirement smile.png (sav a space up there for me - I'll be following along not far behind, as I still drink into retirement!)

Posted

OP, you have cracked the secret to happy married life.

Katharine Hepburn used to say "A married couple should stay in different houses and visit one another occasionally".

Youhave taken it to a foolproof level.

Posted

I'm puzzled as to why the OP considers himself married.

What he describes here is quite a normal situation: a Thai woman married a westerner for the opportunity to live and work in a foreign country.

Clearly, she now values the money she can earn in Switzerland more than her husband's company.

I see nothing wrong with this. The marriage is obviously over, and the Thai woman has got the better life she wanted.

Kudos to her.

I have infinitely more respect for women like this than parasites who live off their husbands.

Posted

I'm puzzled as to why the OP considers himself married.

What he describes here is quite a normal situation: a Thai woman married a westerner for the opportunity to live and work in a foreign country.

Clearly, she now values the money she can earn in Switzerland more than her husband's company.

I see nothing wrong with this. The marriage is obviously over, and the Thai woman has got the better life she wanted.

Kudos to her.

I have infinitely more respect for women like this than parasites who live off their husbands.

Perhaps married by a piece of paper but when one considers swissie's comment "According to her, Thailand is not a desirable place to live, as long as there are better alternatives" then one would consider the basic fundamentals of marriage may never be met. She has found a far better alternative so will she ever "follow at her discretion?" Especially in a western country management position where she is capable of earning solid money until retirement to build assets and then have a pension to stay in that better alternative than Thailand.

Posted

.....she got what she wanted.....you didn't.....

...where does 'perfect' fit in......

...you got perfectly scr*wed...like so many of us did.....

....good f*cking luck convincing yourself otherwise.......

Posted

well I don't know where you live but in OZ a pack of smokes cost 660 baht

but you can always give up whistling.gif

From his TV name I would hazard a guess at Switzerland but could be way off the mark....

I would say that is a fair assumption.

Posted

I met and fell in love with my wife over 15 years ago. We have lived happily together in Thailand and she has never tried to tie me down. I can go out when it suit me,and I have no problem with her doing the same. I consider I have a very good marriage. I married my wife to be with her not thousands of miles apart. I can't see how the poster can say he has a perfect marriage I think he will either find a new girlfriend or have many lonely nights by himself.

Posted

Your wife will continue to work until it is time to retire. She will take her pension and her new boyfriend( 20 years younger then you) Move back to

Thailand, kick you out of the house that you paid for. And live a happy life. When you end up in the hospital due to lung cancer; she will send her

maid to bring you more smokes; so that you will die faster. Good Luck, Mr Happy :)

Posted

Some believe absence makes the heart grow fonder, I believe absence makes the fond

heart wander. Best of luck as you relationship moves forward. whistling.gif

Posted

I'm puzzled as to why the OP considers himself married.

What he describes here is quite a normal situation: a Thai woman married a westerner for the opportunity to live and work in a foreign country.

Clearly, she now values the money she can earn in Switzerland more than her husband's company.

I see nothing wrong with this. The marriage is obviously over, and the Thai woman has got the better life she wanted.

Kudos to her.

I have infinitely more respect for women like this than parasites who live off their husbands.

So you are saying that any wife who does not have a job is a parasite? How wrong can you be? My wife works and I wish I was able to ask her to stop work and I would keep her, she provides for her parents, one thing I would never have been prepared to do.

Posted

I don't understand how this is a 'marriage'. It seems the only resemblance is that you'll be there for eachorher in the event of sickness.

It appears to be more a marriage of convenience/ financial contract, but if you're happy with it, who are we to criticize?

I think you're making assumptions re fidelity, that would be erroneous, but once agsin, if it works to your satisfaction, who are we, etc.

There are plenty of 'dildos with wallets' who have convinced themselves that their arrangements are legitimate, actually work, and are acceptable.

Posted

We are all different obviously...bit I know quite a few people who came to Thailand, got married then went back home to continue on working while the wife stayed in Thailand....and for the life of me I cannot understand the reasoning behind this. I got married here in Thailand because I have been living here for 14 years and did not wish to spend my remaining years alone without any companionship. My wife and I are together most of the time and when we begin to feel the need for our own space she takes up a bit of a job for a few months until we begin again to miss each others company. We go everywhere together (I do not drink so have no "pub" friends or others for that matter for reasons I have explained on here before, I'm reclusive by nature and an disillusioned by most of my fellow mankind by which I mean...they're self centeredness). My wife and I spend a lot of time laughing together and it is getting better as she understands my type of humour and we both get a great kick out of "slagging" each other. If we were to be apart it would be the laughing companionship I would miss the most.

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