You Know you are in Thailand when........

[NoshowJones]

I know topics like this have been on before, they can be quite entertaining, I think it is a good idea to have this topic on

every so often as Thaivisa keeps on getting new members.

So let's hear both your positives and negatives about Thailand.

You know you are in Thailand when You forget your change and someone comes after you with it.

You are walking in a market, and someone comes up behind you on a motorbike pumping their horn at you.

Every yes/no question you ask a Thai, they always say "yes".

When they resurface a road then come to potholes, they leave it then start resurfacing again a little further down the road.

When in ie, Bangkok, you hardly ever hear any vehicles pumping horns, yet in London, New York, Glasgow, you hear them all the time.

Any more?

[wow64]

The pretty girl calling you handsum man has a bigger package then you.

Sent from my c64

[CharlieH]

Vehicles/motorcycles on the wrong side of the road, going the wrong way is the "norm"

Rear lights in pitch dark are optional, not a requirement.

4 up on a motorcycle, is family outing

Meals ordered in a restaurant (2 people) can arrive in any order, and seldom for both people to eat at the same time.

[zyphodb]

Teenagers think it's cool to swap their headlights & tail lights so it looks like they're going in the opposite direction after dark, maybe to confuse ghosts chasing them, lunetics....

[Suradit69]

When some 75 year old farang posts a question on TV asking random strangers if it's true his 20 year old girl friend really loves him because he's a "sexy man."

When some 75 year old farang suspects his 20 year old girl friend is exploiting him and fails to see that he might be accused of the same thing.

When some farang thinks everything in his passport is a visa.

When many foreigners feel Thailand is making too big a deal over their multi-year overstay and that the police should spend more of their time arresting Thais for blocking the pavement/sidewalk while texting.

When farang feel a convenience store is scamming them because they rounded up their Internet provider's invoice to the nearest 25 satang.

When a farang announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of English employed by Immigrations officers.

When a farang English teacher announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of pay he's receiving.

Edited January 30, 2016 by Suradit69

[Gringogazzer]

...the male/female caricatures on the toilet entrance don't necessarily match whose using them.

[BookMan]

[dotpoom]

When I find myself repeating a Noun two times in the course of a conversation....like...Taxi Taxi....Same Same...etc.,

[dotpoom]

OK....so...Same Same...is not a Noun....just checking to see if you are awake 555

[sanukjim]

When walking down the road,You know whether its the high or low season by how handsom the ladies claim you are.

[tomyumchai]

when YOU hand over the money to pay for something and they hand the change back to your thai partner.....

on a funnier point-

when every thai gets the car searched at an army checkpoint but YOU wind the drivers window down and they give it the "oh no its a foreigner" look and wave you straight through.... happens every time for me.

[1FinickyOne]

when you can tell someone wishing to meet you that you are either near the 7/11 or the temple - and never be wrong...

[schaffhausen]

When the lady at Kasikornbank in Korat tell's you that you have to go back to Hua Hin for

changing your Adress from Hua Hin to Korat......

Edited January 30, 2016 by schaffhausen

[schaffhausen]

When the guy at Kasikornbank in the Mall Korat needs exact 45 min to write the confirmation for the immigration office

that you had 800'000 Bath for 3 months in your account...

[lordblackader]

when YOU hand over the money to pay for something and they hand the change back to your thai partner.....

on a funnier point-

when every thai gets the car searched at an army checkpoint but YOU wind the drivers window down and they give it the "oh no its a foreigner" look and wave you straight through.... happens every time for me.

Good to know this isn't in my head and I'm being paranoid. Nearly without fail when I Kep Tang they give me the bill, then return the change to my girlfriend.

[ianrodders]

When you're waiting to shop in T21 mall in Bkk and they're turning away all the white foreigners saying not open till ten but allowing all the Thais to walk through the door at 09:30

[sipi]

When the temperature falls to 18C and you pull on a jacket because you are cold.

[Gsxrnz]

....when you can buy everything you could ever need from the comfort of your bar stool from a passing vendor.

Donuts

Kebabs

Fried Chicken

Noodles etc etc ad nauseam

Belts

Bras

T-Shirts

Viagra

Torches

Lasers

Speakers

Cane Furniture

Mattresses

Towels

Bedding

Statues

Watches

Ear rings

Knickers

Socks

Shoes

Sunglasses

_{Blow Jobs}

Tazers

Jeans

Sausage Rolls & Pies

Porchettas

Crossbows

Calculators

Bucket & Spade Set

Newspapers

Ice Cream

Massages

Manicure Sets

I'm bored now. Feel free to add to the list

[Inquisitorial]

At restaurant/cafe. When your food comes out in staggered intervals and the first person served has eaten their meal before the last person get theirs.

[Gsxrnz]

At restaurant/cafe. When your food comes out in staggered intervals and the first person served has eaten their meal before the last person get theirs.

While I take your point when applied to a Western restaurant or when ordering western food, I don't concur when it comes to Thai food. Thai dishes are (in the most part) not single dishes to be consumed by one person.

The dishes are meant to be shared - so having the various dishes arrive at intervals is entirely appropriate.

Sure, it's a pain when one wants a single western dish and the others order Thai.

[colinneil]

When you order steak/ chips, you finish the steak then the chips arrive (yes did happen to me once )

When you ask for something in a shop and you get !! no hab!! as the answer. Even though you can see what you want in front of you.

[Ghostnigel]

When some 75 year old farang posts a question on TV asking random strangers if it's true his 20 year old girl friend really loves him because he's a "sexy man."

When some 75 year old farang suspects his 20 year old girl friend is exploiting him and fails to see that he might be accused of the same thing.

When some farang thinks everything in his passport is a visa.

When many foreigners feel Thailand is making too big a deal over their multi-year overstay and that the police should spend more of their time arresting Thais for blocking the pavement/sidewalk while texting.

When farang feel a convenience store is scamming them because they rounded up their Internet provider's invoice to the nearest 25 satang.

When a farang announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of English employed by Immigrations officers.

When a farang English teacher announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of pay he's receiving.

You're in Thailand when, people spell border as boarder, and advice as advise....and you have the urge to correct it....sorry mate, gotta be done, lol

[angiolo]

At restaurant/cafe. When your food comes out in staggered intervals and the first person served has eaten their meal before the last person get theirs.

Then you must be in a greek cafe

[NoshowJones]

When walking down the road,You know whether its the high or low season by how handsom the ladies claim you are.

Yes, even the fat, tattooed brigade.

[GMajor]

When a shop's opening hours are from noon to 3 AM

When you show up at 3 PM to find it closed

When you call the shop owner to know when he'll be there but he doesn't make it on time and does not call you back either.

When you finally get your appointment the day after with an ultimatum "I am at the shop for the next 45 minutes"

When you get there but never hear a faint word of excuse

When you find out at last that you're dealing with a really fine individual who really cares and devotes all of his attention to your problem.

[NoshowJones]

When you're waiting to shop in T21 mall in Bkk and they're turning away all the white foreigners saying not open till ten but allowing all the Thais to walk through the door at 09:30

That's a new one on me. But in Thailand, you believe anything.

[NoshowJones]

When the temperature falls to 18C and you pull on a jacket because you are cold.

I don't, I have not got a jacket, only a hoodie I brought back from the UK.

[Gsxrnz]

When some 75 year old farang posts a question on TV asking random strangers if it's true his 20 year old girl friend really loves him because he's a "sexy man."

When some 75 year old farang suspects his 20 year old girl friend is exploiting him and fails to see that he might be accused of the same thing.

When some farang thinks everything in his passport is a visa.

When many foreigners feel Thailand is making too big a deal over their multi-year overstay and that the police should spend more of their time arresting Thais for blocking the pavement/sidewalk while texting.

When farang feel a convenience store is scamming them because they rounded up their Internet provider's invoice to the nearest 25 satang.

When a farang announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of English employed by Immigrations officers.

When a farang English teacher announces he was doing a "boarder" run and asks for "advise" while simultaneously complaining about the poor level of pay he's receiving.

You're in Thailand when, people spell border as boarder, and advice as advise....and you have the urge to correct it....sorry mate, gotta be done, lol

Um.....you missed the satire

But to be fair, maybe he should have used (sic) instead of quotes.

Edited January 30, 2016 by Gsxrnz

[NoshowJones]

....when you can buy everything you could ever need from the comfort of your bar stool from a passing vendor.

Donuts

Kebabs

Fried Chicken

Noodles etc etc ad nauseam

Belts

Bras

T-Shirts

Viagra

Torches

Lasers

Speakers

Cane Furniture

Mattresses

Towels

Bedding

Statues

Watches

Ear rings

Knickers

Socks

Shoes

Sunglasses

_{Blow Jobs}

Tazers

Jeans

Sausage Rolls & Pies

Porchettas

Crossbows

Calculators

Bucket & Spade Set

Newspapers

Ice Cream

Massages

Manicure Sets

I'm bored now. Feel free to add to the list

I never sit on a barstool, but I get the drift. Ice cream and bread together.

[samsensam]

When I find myself repeating a Noun two times in the course of a conversation....like...Taxi Taxi....Same Same...etc.,

same is used as an adjective or pronoun. sorry to be a pedant but if we don't know our basic english grammar how can we hope to help the thais?