British man's Thai wife killed by ya ba addict - druggy was her "gik", say police

[spidermike007]

First of all RIP to the Thai wife that leaves behind two children and a hubby.

I went through the same problems 6 years ago.

After 19 years marriage and finally going for a divorce, I picked up a stunner in a bar on Cowboy and a week later I was already in Udon to meet the family and discuss Sinsod and completing her mansion that was still not finished yet after two other farangs from Italy and Holland left her.

At the time I worked in Singapore and my relationship started in September and ended on Songkran around 7 months later. I ignored all the red lights for almost 7 months and longterm friends that have known me for over 20 years and lived in Bangkok told me to run as far as I can out of the relationship.

Their have been many red lights:

1) I had to pay every day for a dinner and a lot of Sonchai's came to the party which most were introduced to me as their cousins, neighbors, high low players etc.

2) Family had every day money problems as they are all hooked up to gambling, yaba and drinking

3) I told my Udon lady to stop gambling, drinking and her words to me was only stupid farangs pay sinsod to a bar lady or even consider a bar girl as their future wife.

4) I called her from Singapore and told her that I am coming back to Udon in two days time and she told me on the phone that she miss me so much. What she didn't know was that I was on the way to the airport already and I hired a limo from Udon and visited at night our (her) home and surprise she was with a guy who she introduced as her cousin to me. This guy only showed up after the house was build and during the time of construction the guy could not be seen.

5) She also had a brother in law who is a farang and his wife bragged how much money she had from this guy every month. The guy was almost 70 years and always out of the country and came only once a year for two months. He too found his wife on Soi Cowboy and has been working none-stop to finance her a lifestyle that every Isaan woman in that village asked her to find a rich farang hubby. When I went to the bar on Cowboy again I noted 5 girls in the bar that came all from the same village.

What I try to say is that no one needs to be surprised that a Thai bargirl wants to have a gik on the sideline when hubby is overseas. It is fairly to say that if the woman was a bargirl that she was in the trade for making money and this will not stop even after they are married and have children.

As for me I was burned and wrote off 1.5 million Baht over a period of 7 months but I know guys in Udon they have been milked for over 10 years and lost far more money then I did in 7 months. I have no bad feelings towards her but I am very happy that I listen on the end to close friends that saved me and my money.

Great story. I applaud you for your candor. It takes a big man to admit to something like this.

Yeah, on an anonymous forum it takes a really big man ....give me a break...

Was it you using one of your other numerous accounts ?

Please enlighten us all with your equally courageous acts, that you have performed lately. It does not take a particularly big man, to attempt to look taller, by lopping off the head of the man standing next to him.

[thaiguzzi]

9 pages and counting of drivel and condescending poor taste posts.

Some of the posts are verging on disgusting.

I can count on one hand the number of decent posts.

Typical of this forum.

You guys really need to get out more and get a life.

RIP to the poor woman, nobody deserves this.

Love and Respect to the husband and his two kids.

I totally agree tg.

It's the pack mentality that reads about a terrible incident and thinks it's fair game to rip pieces out of the husband and wife, without knowing all the facts.

I think I know the husband. He's a decent bloke who doesn't deserve this.

Indeed.

Ya Know, if this had been a Thai/Thai incident without a Felang husband in the background, i doubt the story would have got more than a page or two in replies.

Basically, a Felang's wife, and mother of his two kids has been murdered. Allegedly, she had a Thai boyfriend, who is the perp.

So this then turns into the usual hate, anger, and vitriol spewing forth from the majority of forum posters, keyboard warriors, whatever. Certainly not decent human beings with a modicum of intelligence and half a heart.

I mean, words and phrases like;

"slut"

"lowlife"

"she had it coming to her"

"she got what she deserved".

Then it goes off tangent, chastity, adultery, statistics, marriage counsellors, pscyco anylists, and "bar girls", "can't keep their legs shut", "Thai women they're all the same"....

Jesus H. Christ, where do people get this stuff from. There's good and bad in everybody and everywhere, but these sweeping generalisations, Jeez. Some very bitter and twisted people about.

[Artisi]

And guess it follows that Western women and Western men are the pillars of chastity and would never even contemplate such a thing.

No, they are not, but Thais are number 1!

Statistics, aren't they marvellous for those trying to win an argument.

56% of Thais from a population of 70M or thereabouts compared to how many millions totalled from the countries listed, you will have to try harder than that.

guessing maths is not your forte then?

What has math got to do with , when countering a statement implying that Thais do it more than the rest of the world, seems comprehension is not your forte then.

[Agent Sumo]

The usual suspects spewing out the usual guff.

"Thai women this, Thai women that, they should be grateful that some surly control freak is paying their bills and taking them on BigC shopping extravaganzas blah, blah, blah"

Sad sack farangs select wives based on how much control they can exert over her with money then cry like pussies when she plays away with another guy who at least pretends to show her more affection than a monthly stipend.

After all, what more could she possibly want than her bills paid, Thai daytime soaps and lots of som tam, right?

Almost every married farang guy I know is smashing something else on the side so can we shelve the double standards, please?

Men are at it, women are at it, everyone's at it

[NCFC]

Every time he looks at his kids he'll be reminded of her. Better to put them up for adoption and move on.

[coxo]

Every time he looks at his kids he'll be reminded of her. Better to put them up for adoption and move on.

I can see you don't have children by this moronic statement!

[SussexExpat]

Every time he looks at his kids he'll be reminded of her. Better to put them up for adoption and move on.

Is that the best you can come up with? I'm sure if you used your other brain cell you could think of something more moronic.

[Broken Record]

The usual suspects spewing out the usual guff.

"Thai women this, Thai women that, they should be grateful that some surly control freak is paying their bills and taking them on BigC shopping extravaganzas blah, blah, blah"

Sad sack farangs select wives based on how much control they can exert over her with money then cry like pussies when she plays away with another guy who at least pretends to show her more affection than a monthly stipend.

After all, what more could she possibly want than her bills paid, Thai daytime soaps and lots of som tam, right?

Almost every married farang guy I know is smashing something else on the side so can we shelve the double standards, please?

Men are at it, women are at it, everyone's at it

ThaiVisa members are different.

[soc]

I don't know the details of this relationship like other well-informed TVF members, so all I can say is that I hope the two children will be taken care of in the best way and that the murderer will be brought to justice.

However, I am a bit puzzled by this

the deceased's white Mazda license plate กบ 1800 (Udon Thani)

why would she keep her licence plate in the bedroom, and why would the killer want to steal it?

The sentence makes sense if there is a comer after the word "Mazda".

[soc]

Maybe he did know & condoned it, if she kept it discreet.

However she didn't keep it discreet, silly woman.

She shouldn't have picked a junkie.

[geriatrickid]

The bright side is that the Brit fellow is better off. Maybe now he will learn it is better to rent than to marry.

And what of the children?

No matter how awful the woman may have been she was 2 kids' mother.

They merit some compassion do they not?

[gk10002000]

Almost unbelievable the way Thais rationalize things, except I have been to the country a dozen times. The Thai "lover" who was fooling around with the married lady was himself mad because he thought she was fooling around with somebody else!

[gemguy]

whats new, married with kids and screwing a druggie on the side, not happy enough with a well to do hubby, nice house, well financed, needed a bit of side action to keep her occupied while he was away working, nothing new at all for some thai women, they simply cant keep their legs closed, marriage means nothing but then many thai men are the same

And guess it follows that Western women and Western men are the pillars of chastity and would never even contemplate such a thing.

Anyone who has lived here knows, unless completely blinkered by rose coloured glasses, that Thais are very 'flexible' with regards to morals and loyalty.

They even have names for it

'mia noi' 'gik' as it's so prevalent it's the 'norm'. To be fair males far more than females but it's part of 'Thainess' that guys have a 'mia noi' and a few 'giks' and females are, more or less, accepting here and THAT does not happen in Western countries that I know of. Cheating sometimes yes but not a pandemic of 'flexible sex' as it is here.

I believe the Old English word to describe women such as that is: Trollop

"She was a right and proper Trollop"

I like it........So let's use the word Trollop as a regular part of our English vocabulary to describe such girls or women.

Of course proper English is essential.... so there is no misunderstanding.....correct?.....lol

So...everyone repeat after me: "That woman is a real Trollop"

Cheers

Edited July 16, 2016 by gemguy

[Artisi]

whats new, married with kids and screwing a druggie on the side, not happy enough with a well to do hubby, nice house, well financed, needed a bit of side action to keep her occupied while he was away working, nothing new at all for some thai women, they simply cant keep their legs closed, marriage means nothing but then many thai men are the same

And guess it follows that Western women and Western men are the pillars of chastity and would never even contemplate such a thing.

Anyone who has lived here knows, unless completely blinkered by rose coloured glasses, that Thais are very 'flexible' with regards to morals and loyalty.

They even have names for it

'mia noi' 'gik' as it's so prevalent it's the 'norm'. To be fair males far more than females but it's part of 'Thainess' that guys have a 'mia noi' and a few 'giks' and females are, more or less, accepting here and THAT does not happen in Western countries that I know of. Cheating sometimes yes but not a pandemic of 'flexible sex' as it is here.

I believe the Old English word to describe women such as that is: Trollop

"She was a right and proper Trollop"

I like it........So let's use the word Trollop as a regular part of our English vocabulary to describe such girls or women.

Of course proper English is essential.... so there is no misunderstanding.....correct?.....lol

So...everyone repeat after me: "That woman is a real Trollop"

Cheers

That woman was a real trollop. (grammar)

That's assuming she was which is something we don't know for a fact.

[bamukloy]

First of all RIP to the Thai wife that leaves behind two children and a hubby.

I went through the same problems 6 years ago.

After 19 years marriage and finally going for a divorce, I picked up a stunner in a bar on Cowboy and a week later I was already in Udon to meet the family and discuss Sinsod and completing her mansion that was still not finished yet after two other farangs from Italy and Holland left her.

At the time I worked in Singapore and my relationship started in September and ended on Songkran around 7 months later. I ignored all the red lights for almost 7 months and longterm friends that have known me for over 20 years and lived in Bangkok told me to run as far as I can out of the relationship.

Their have been many red lights:

1) I had to pay every day for a dinner and a lot of Sonchai's came to the party which most were introduced to me as their cousins, neighbors, high low players etc.

2) Family had every day money problems as they are all hooked up to gambling, yaba and drinking

3) I told my Udon lady to stop gambling, drinking and her words to me was only stupid farangs pay sinsod to a bar lady or even consider a bar girl as their future wife.

4) I called her from Singapore and told her that I am coming back to Udon in two days time and she told me on the phone that she miss me so much. What she didn't know was that I was on the way to the airport already and I hired a limo from Udon and visited at night our (her) home and surprise she was with a guy who she introduced as her cousin to me. This guy only showed up after the house was build and during the time of construction the guy could not be seen.

5) She also had a brother in law who is a farang and his wife bragged how much money she had from this guy every month. The guy was almost 70 years and always out of the country and came only once a year for two months. He too found his wife on Soi Cowboy and has been working none-stop to finance her a lifestyle that every Isaan woman in that village asked her to find a rich farang hubby. When I went to the bar on Cowboy again I noted 5 girls in the bar that came all from the same village.

What I try to say is that no one needs to be surprised that a Thai bargirl wants to have a gik on the sideline when hubby is overseas. It is fairly to say that if the woman was a bargirl that she was in the trade for making money and this will not stop even after they are married and have children.

As for me I was burned and wrote off 1.5 million Baht over a period of 7 months but I know guys in Udon they have been milked for over 10 years and lost far more money then I did in 7 months. I have no bad feelings towards her but I am very happy that I listen on the end to close friends that saved me and my money.

Great story. I applaud you for your candor. It takes a big man to admit to something like this. There are countless lessons to be learned from your plight.

1. First and foremost is the realization that time is our ally. Time almost always benefits us, and rarely benefits her. So use it wisely. Take your time getting to know her. Her issues, problems, neurosis, dilemmas, conflicts, anger, jealousy, possessiveness, emotional baggage, and all else will reveal itself given enough time. Do not allow HER to push the agenda. It is up to YOU to control the agenda. Push back. She will nearly always push the timetable. She may be in a hurry to take your money, or at the minimum, establish more financial security. Do not allow it. We are working on my timeframe here. If that does not work for you, you can leave anytime. Nothing you say or do is going to push the timeline, for me. Nothing. All you are doing by pushing the timeline is revealing your level of anxiety, and making me question whether or not being with you is the right thing for me. Keep pushing, and I am out of here.

2. Hooking up with a bar girl, and in the extreme, a Soi Cowboy, Nana, or Pattaya go-go girl is a recipe for disaster. It takes a very strong man to survive something like that. You just do not know where she has been, what she has been up to, or the extent of the whole thing. But, one thing that is safe to assume, in most cases, is that she has been with hundreds if not thousands already, and the chances of her having a healthy agenda toward you, and a healthy state of mind are very low. And the second thing that is safe to assume, is that the story she is telling you is NOT the truth, and not her life.

3. Typically, most women here are more clever than we are. Many are very skilled in plying their trade, telling us what we want to hear, and creating a background story line, that works for us. A lot of foreigners come here and are very emotionally vulnerable. The women know that. So, buyer beware. Again, take your time. Chances are, that a really beautiful, sexy young thing will not want you to take your time, and may not have much patience for that. So what? It takes a long time to really get to know someone. That applies for the majority of civilians. And when you are talking about a bar or go-go girl, even more time is needed, to know what you are dealing with. The potential issues are just too great. So, if she is not willing to give you that time, what do you do? You move on. No hesitation. It does not matter how sexy, or how beautiful she is. You just move on. You treat yourself with kindness, respect, and dignity, and do the right thing, and walk out that door!

Nice advice, but wouldnt it be easier to just not hang around bar girls?

I say, being on your own is better than living a lie, bank accounts drained, having to go home etc

[bruceamstutz]

new

The bright side is that the Brit fellow is better off. Maybe now he will learn it is better to rent than to marry.

If I had to guess I would say at least a ha-sip ha-sip chance the Husband was doing the same thing during his business trips and She knew it was going on.....Feel sorry for the kids and may She RIP.....

[SussexExpat]

new

The bright side is that the Brit fellow is better off. Maybe now he will learn it is better to rent than to marry.

If I had to guess I would say at least a ha-sip ha-sip chance the Husband was doing the same thing during his business trips and She knew it was going on.....Feel sorry for the kids and may She RIP.....

Guess again.

[Rough Rider]

The British husband will know about this by now I guess and will be flying to Thailand.

Maybe get his 2 children and his empty house where his wife was strangled by her lover boy.

He will need to sell the house as he can not own land in Thailand.

I can imagine a better life as this.

Hope the kids will be in good hands.

Sell the house? Are you sure? I'm sure her parents already arranged that they will have the house. Udon is Isaan and these greedy people will make sure they get everything that is available because the money tree was cut down by this drug addicted lover boy. May her sole find peace, and the husband his house back. Another sad ending for a farang in Thailand

[NCFC]

There's nothing in this piece to suggest she was eating fish.