The ONLY farang on the block syndrome

[Kwasaki]

On 8/22/2016 at 0:54 PM, Kwasaki said:

There's a young Englishman here about 2 years whose built about 6 terraced bungalow guest rooms with his wife's on her bit of village land she has.

 

2 hours ago, JJGreen said:

You have lost me. Do u mean the rooms are for her family?
I initially thought u meant guest rooms for travellers... which seemed odd for a small village

 

You thought right first time, they just appeared one day and they developed his wife/gf ?  land in building terraced Guesthouse rooms one of which is at end and larger which they live in.

 

' My ' village   is not small and a tourist destination,  so because there are so many Hotels,  resorts,  Guesthouses and Home Stay places they thought it a good idea to do the same.    

[Kwasaki]

51 minutes ago, billd766 said:

 

In my small village there are 3 resorts in a 2 km stretch of the road. None of them seem to make enough money to keep going but somehow they do.

 

Ours is a big village really but it's still the same here,  they survive mainly because they own the land and live there,  whenever l ask hows things they always say there full.  

[JJGreen]

Why would I be interested in talking to you just because we happen to have the same colour skin? We probably have bugger all else in common.

 

Some people seem to think farangs in Thailand are all members of some club and should acknowledge each other whenever they meet. I don't agree. You're just some random white dude I don't know. I wouldn't make a fuss over meeting you back where I came from, so I'm not going to do it here either.

That's a different issue...and a recent thread from memory.
This is about wanting to be the only farang on the block...not about saying hello or not

[SoiBiker]

7 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

That's a different issue...and a recent thread from memory.
This is about wanting to be the only farang on the block...not about saying hello or not

 

So what are you basing your presumption of this desire on if not their lack of willingness to greet you?

[JJGreen]

 

So what are you basing your presumption of this desire on if not their lack of willingness to greet you?

I wouldnt put that down as anywhere near a reason for my observations.

[SoiBiker]

 

21 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

I wouldnt put that down as anywhere near a reason for my observations.

 

So what are you basing this on?

[MissAndry]

On 8/17/2016 at 1:54 PM, JJGreen said:

 

kenk, that wasn't what I was referring to but it could be part of it for sure. There could be lots of reasons somepne doesn't want to engage in a conversation; Having an off day, different language speaker, introvert, unsociable, wary, etcetera.

 

 

I don't want to talk with lonely and needy old men.

It's as simple as that.

[JJGreen]

 

 

So what are you basing this on?

Personal observations and speaking to people about their thoughts on the subject. Quite a number of posters have added their own observations and reasons for the phenomenon on this thread

[SoiBiker]

So what was it you observed that lead you to believe people felt this way?

[JJGreen]

So what was it you observed that lead you to believe people felt this way?

FArangs resentful of seeing other farangs in their space. Body language...mannerisms..
Attitude

[bamukloy]

On Thursday, August 18, 2016 at 0:57 AM, Lee4Life said:

I have found many other farangs to be unapproachable. I don't feel like I am partial to anyone, but it seems like when I try and talk to most other foreigners they just aren't interested.

I wouldnt be to upset..no great loss!

Just look at a few posters here. They see a guy walking down a soiand next they ASSume hes a looser, couldnt make it in his own country..is worried about being exposed..

Wow just on sight they can deduct all this 

Why would you want to associate with em anyway.

A lot of em come from countries that are billions in debt, yet claim the best country, the richest in the world...blah blah

Yeah, who are real loosers buddy?

[SoiBiker]

Just now, JJGreen said:

FArangs resentful of seeing other farangs in their space. Body language...mannerisms..
Attitude

 

Not exactly conclusive, is it?

[JJGreen]

 

Not exactly conclusive, is it?

Not at all..That's why i put it out there on the forum to see if others have noticed

Seems like enough people agree and have observed it too...

Also many added reasons and thoughts why

Have a read through the thread

[Gecko123]

Upcountry, there seems to be two subsets of people: long-timers and newbies. Quite often, a high percentage of the newbies bail out after a fairly short period of time. Marital problems, boredom, social isolation, relocation (either to other parts of Thailand or back home), automobile accidents, and health problems are leading reasons for why this happens. Some guys might come across as unfriendly simply because they have sized a new comer up, and decided they won't be around for very long and its not worth the effort to get to know them.

 

Truth be told, there is also a lot of insecurity in the expatriate community. People constantly size one another up over how much money they have, how big their house is, how well they speak Thai, how pretty or young their Thai wife is, etc., etc. Thais size expats up just as much, but usually the expat is held in fairly high esteem in their eyes, if for no other reason than most expats have greater comparative wealth. When another farang lands on the scene, its like the yard stick changes, which can cause stress.

 

I once ran into the Thai widow of an expatriate who had died the year before in a motorcycle accident. I asked her what her deceased husband thought about me and the rest of the foreigners who he hung out with in town. She told me he badmouthed the rest of us every time he came home. Got a laugh out of that one. I'll admit I do it too. If people want to pretend they're on a higher plane and never do that, so be it, but my experience is that this behavior is virtually universal. I could tell a lot more stories like this, but basically most guys want to be "king of the jungle" over here, and anyone who calls their self-perception into question is often not so welcome.

 

Also, Thailand, "the land of smiles" attracts a lot of guys who are challenged in the social skills department. Again, I'll happily admit that I fall into this category as well. Those already marginal social skills can be further eroded by living in a 100% Thai environment to the point where it can sometimes be challenging to form new relationships. 

 

Finally, there is a Thai Visa mentality out there which contributes to this phenomena. You know, the attitude that anyone who wants to strike up a conversation is a needy loser who should be shunned at all costs. Or the:  "I didn't come over here to hang out with other foreigners" mentality. Or the "all other expats except me are either wanted by Interpol, pedophiles, going to hit me up for a loan, or come hang out at my house day after day."

 

 

[JJGreen]

Upcountry, there seems to be two subsets of people: long-timers and newbies. Quite often, a high percentage of the newbies bail out after a fairly short period of time. Marital problems, boredom, social isolation, relocation (either to other parts of Thailand or back home), automobile accidents, and health problems are leading reasons for why this happens. Some guys might come across as unfriendly simply because they have sized a new comer up, and decided they won't be around for very long and its not worth the effort to get to know them.

 

Truth be told, there is also a lot of insecurity in the expatriate community. People constantly size one another up over how much money they have, how big their house is, how well they speak Thai, how pretty or young their Thai wife is, etc., etc. Thais size expats up just as much, but usually the expat is held in fairly high esteem in their eyes, if for no other reason than most expats have greater comparative wealth. When another farang lands on the scene, its like the yard stick changes, which can cause stress.

 

I once ran into the Thai widow of an expatriate who had died the year before in a motorcycle accident. I asked her what her deceased husband thought about me and the rest of the foreigners who he hung out with in town. She told me he badmouthed the rest of us every time he came home. Got a laugh out of that one. I'll admit I do it too. If people want to pretend they're on a higher plane and never do that, so be it, but my experience is that this behavior is virtually universal. I could tell a lot more stories like this, but basically most guys want to be "king of the jungle" over here, and anyone who calls their self-perception into question is often not so welcome.

 

Also, Thailand, "the land of smiles" attracts a lot of guys who are challenged in the social skills department. Again, I'll happily admit that I fall into this category as well. Those already marginal social skills can be further eroded by living in a 100% Thai environment to the point where it can sometimes be challenging to form new relationships. 

 

Finally, there is a Thai Visa mentality out there which contributes to this phenomena. You know, the attitude that anyone who wants to strike up a conversation is a needy loser who should be shunned at all costs. Or the:  "I didn't come over here to hang out with other foreigners" mentality. Or the "all other expats except me are either wanted by Interpol, pedophiles, going to hit me up for a loan, or come hang out at my house day after day."

 

 

Great post...id give it two likes

[happy Joe]

3 hours ago, MissAndry said:

 

I don't want to talk with lonely and needy old men.

It's as simple as that.

 

Hee hee! That is funny. 

And for me I don't want to meet people who are at least as stupid as me.

[SoiBiker]

3 hours ago, MissAndry said:

 

I don't want to talk with lonely and needy old men.

It's as simple as that.

 

And yet you use this forum?

[pgrahmm]

Coming from this at a different point of view.....I think.....

 

Admittedly haven't read all the previous posts.....

 

When we moved in years ago our MooBaan was about 70/30 Thai ownership & it was a nice friendly mix.....Lot's of friendly smiles and hellos - friendly, respectfully quiet neighbors.....Fruit shared from trees & a nice atmosphere.......Farangs -just enough to talk to and mix with as desired......Pleasant......

 

Now, the mix has flip flopped....

The Thai's have moved on & the area is the worse for it......Farangs are running up & down the roads with the the guys running cluelessly shirtless....The stout farangwoman are marching through the streets gracelessly with earbuds in talking loud enough to be heard over the earbuds + 3 houses away......The acknowledgement, smiles, nods, and hello's went away with the Thais.......New speed bumps have been installed due to more aggressive driving......We're 14K out of CM & reaching Farang saturation......

 

About 9K further away I'm noticing Farangs walking in areas & shops I never or rarely had seen them before, where alternate transportation is sparse,l so there is definitely an influx......

 

We're in the process of looking into other areas......

 

We/I don't need to be the "only" Farang in town......But, we also don't need to be in a Farang saturated area......Moved to Thailand because I liked it & the people - still do.....

 

Quite frankly the Thais are better neighbors.......And in many cases (but not all) better people......

 

 

 

 

[SoiBiker]

It's funny when people complain about a problem they're part of. 

[JJGreen]

Coming from this at a different point of view.....I think.....

 

Admittedly haven't read all the previous posts.....

 

When we moved in years ago our MooBaan was about 70/30 Thai ownership & it was a nice friendly mix.....Lot's of friendly smiles and hellos - friendly, respectfully quiet neighbors.....Fruit shared from trees & a nice atmosphere.......Farangs -just enough to talk to and mix with as desired......Pleasant......

 

Now, the mix has flip flopped....

The Thai's have moved on & the area is the worse for it......Farangs are running up & down the roads with the the guys running cluelessly shirtless....The stout farangwoman are marching through the streets gracelessly with earbuds in talking loud enough to be heard over the earbuds + 3 houses away......The acknowledgement, smiles, nods, and hello's went away with the Thais.......New speed bumps have been installed due to more aggressive driving......We're 14K out of CM & reaching Farang saturation......

 

About 9K further away I'm noticing Farangs walking in areas & shops I never or rarely had seen them before, where alternate transportation is sparse,l so there is definitely an influx......

 

We're in the process of looking into other areas......

 

We/I don't need to be the "only" Farang in town......But, we also don't need to be in a Farang saturated area......Moved to Thailand because I liked it & the people - still do.....

 

Quite frankly the Thais are better neighbors.......And in many cases (but not all) better people......

 

 

 

 

That would be part of it...but in a more adjusted and rational way than some others ive seen

[Rc2702]

No problem seeing other foreigners about will always smile and acknowledge if in close proximity but I don't go out my way looking for farang friendly bars in fact I avoid them at all costs as the general conversation is pretty dull and the common topic is thai bashing. 

[pgrahmm]

16 hours ago, SoiBiker said:

It's funny when people complain about a problem they're part of. 

 

Welcome to the human condition......

 

The kids are Thai born so we're a 75/25 at our house.... - and me  ......

Edited August 28, 2016 by pgrahmm

[rott]

On Saturday, August 27, 2016 at 11:20 AM, SoiBiker said:

Why would I be interested in talking to you just because we happen to have the same colour skin? We probably have bugger all else in common.

 

Some people seem to think farangs in Thailand are all members of some club and should acknowledge each other whenever they meet. I don't agree. You're just some random white dude I don't know. I wouldn't make a fuss over meeting you back where I came from, so I'm not going to do it here either.

Logical enough in Sukhumvit or Silom, but to me in a location where you possibly only see one or two farangs a day it seems odd and ignorant not to say hello. Doesn't hurt and costs nothing.