How to show the Thai gf who's boss?

[samsensam]

 

get yourself a gik and a mia noi, a double whammy;  show her who's boss and that you understand and want to conform to thai culture

 

 

[samsensam]

 

or... start playing Bruce Springsteen CDs

[Si Thea01]

21 hours ago, Jdiddy said:

Start seeing other girls

 

 

That's a death wish.

[catman20]

20 hours ago, Peterw42 said:

Shag her sister usually sets the ground rules.

or the mother 

[Peterw42]

7 hours ago, fanc said:

I'm pretty new to this forum, my wife and I are considering moving to Thailand next year - depending on life factors - but we'll end up there for a year or two at some point.

 

Anyway, to get to the point I notice a lot of the guys in this forum basically talk about their girlfriends and wives as if they're property.  It's kinda shocking to read, and really not all that surprising that a lot of you guys are pretty miserable.  Like how do you expect to have a halfway decent relationship with a person you don't even really consider to be a person?

 

i'm not sure if OP is trolling, but it doesn't really seem all that out of line with a lot of the other posts in here.

 

This thread is in the Farang Pub forum, ie: a light hearted tongue in cheek forum, the sort of crap you would talk at the pub. The OP is asking a pretty misogynistic question ( I dont think He means literally) and I think you will find the answers are in response to that. 

[lostinisaan]

That's an easy one. Just wear her skirts and bras and let her walk around in sandals, socks and filthy shorts that see a washing machine every three months only.........

[lostinisaan]

40 minutes ago, transam said:

Yeh, she emailed me this morning..................

 

 Damn ! And I thought I was the only one......

[dotpoom]

Is she your girlfriend ....or your underling.?

[Calach]

7 hours ago, fanc said:

Anyway, to get to the point I notice a lot of the guys in this forum basically talk about their girlfriends and wives as if they're property. 

 

Usually it's more like a rental.

[NoshowJones]

Even before I start to read the OP, I will say this. In a relationship or marriage, there is no boss.

Decisions should be made equally, with compromises to be made if required.

[Psimbo]

If you don't want to give up BJs you can't show her who's boss !

[NoshowJones]

7 hours ago, Don Mega said:

Property implies ownership.

I do not own my missus, if she don't like my rules she is free to leave at anytime.

and it you don't like her rules, you are free to leave also.

[bridge2bridge]

DON'T give her EVERYTHING she wants.

And if she is not happy tell her to GO.

EASY.

 

[TPI]

5 hours ago, fanc said:

 

Even if your relationship is entirely a financial transaction, you should still treat the other person with some dignity.  They aren't your property any more than an employee is property.  If you think of employees as property you're going to have a bad time as an employer.

 

 

What are you keeping her around for then? You don't sound all that attached.

 

 

Heh I assume you're being a bit ironic, but I don't really see why men should be in charge anyway.  Not that women should be in charge, either.   In a relationship it's better to be (at least I've found in my life) in an equal relationship where both partners respect each other than one where you have to lay out ground rules like you're her father.

Ah franc franc! In a "normal" relationship things are generally pretty even, in Thailand the same rules don't apply. Men fill a certain niche in society, women fill another and never the twain shall meet! I don't like it and most reasonable men don't like it but it's the way the women like it non the less!! You'll find Thai society similar to the one your grandmother would recognise where women have a different sort of relationship with their husbands than what you would consider normal!

[Pimay1]

Put you gf or wife on a strict budget and explain to her when the money is gone for this month she will get no more until next month and stick to it.

[Emster23]

Seems if you feel the need to ask us how to show her "who's the boss" perhaps hold a mirror up to her face....

[4MyEgo]

My model of 10 years is still working as if she was brand new, she hasn't changed, I have never had to updated her program either, she knows I have the remote and she can be replaced at the press of a button, simple really, but having said that, I really love my model, a bit like my Kawasaki ZZR 1100 back in the old country, she would get up and go whenever I turned the throttle back, enjoyed riding that bike as much as I do the Mrs, although had to get rid of the bitch (bike), due to having had a heart attack one day, will let you work that one out.

[MANFROMBOCA]

growing a set of balls helps

[silent]

5 hours ago, transam said:

There's a lot of farang 'tough' talk going on here..........................

 

Fishing for a belated welcome to thai visa ?

[lord john]

4 hours ago, Donutz said:

I agree Fanc, but it seems that this forum attracks a good number of trolls, grumphy men and old farts with old fashioned views (dating back to the 1950's or even as far as the stone age). Oh and let's forget those who think that any Thai women, especially those with a farang, can be bought...

I've got plenty of bruses dropping out of my chair over such posts. I don't venture into this area of the forum often but I kinda got used to it. To me some of the relationships or 'relationships' described seem like absolute horror to me. I'm glad that I had a charming wife who saw me as much her equal as I saw her. No boss, not being a 'daddy' (would be kinda hard with me being younger than her 555). The topic starter could very well be a troll, but some of the posts are very much with serious undertone. But to each their own, if two people are in a relationship on an other basis than love, trust and equals, fine by me. Ofcourse if both are fine with the arrangement and atleast have some level of respect for eachother. Such a relation would be absolute hell to me but those posters might find a relationship like I had absolute horror and self destructive. They probably got dumped by an ex who took a lot from them and they lost trust in women? Or see Thai women as different were as I do not, finding 'culture' overrated. Culture is a thin layer of cloth, most is determined by personality, intelligence and a persons past.  My love was just a fantastic person, nothing different or the same to her as any other women on this planet. She happend to be 'Thai' but that was just a label. Met her by chanche and I do have a weakness for asian females but I don't buy into the 'they are different' stories. It's all about finding that perfect person, lover, match. 

I must agree with Donutz. I have been in a relationship with a Thai lady for almost four years now. I find it's not so much me being the boss in our relationship, as her expecting me to be the decision maker in most instances. She tends to consider me before anything else. At first I could not understand it like, how she stopped me doing my own laundry because she would lose face for not taking good care of her man. But when you are in Thailand you must be accepting of the differences and not be constantly seeking to poo poo their ways. Lest you be unhappy. 

[Kabula]

Pay her more, listen, speak less, hold her, do what she enjoys, and she should be more  submissive; until a better deal comes along; sadly...

 

But, not always the case!

[elgordo38]

8 hours ago, fanc said:

I'm pretty new to this forum, my wife and I are considering moving to Thailand next year - depending on life factors - but we'll end up there for a year or two at some point.

 

Anyway, to get to the point I notice a lot of the guys in this forum basically talk about their girlfriends and wives as if they're property.  It's kinda shocking to read, and really not all that surprising that a lot of you guys are pretty miserable.  Like how do you expect to have a halfway decent relationship with a person you don't even really consider to be a person?

 

i'm not sure if OP is trolling, but it doesn't really seem all that out of line with a lot of the other posts in here.

Be it a g/f, wife or property. They cost money to woo and maintain.Then there is high and low maintenance. If your lucky its the latter. Then there is the humor of TV posters who like to banter about their "property"  To have a decent half way relationship you have to lighten up. The other half wants a man that is funny and humorous. When you pack your suitcase for Thailand don't forget to pack your humor and your smile. 

Signed 

Miserable with a smile on my face.

P.S. Feel free to seek further advice. Its free and we will definitely help you over the rough spots here. In no time flat you will re read your message above and break out laughing.  

[Dazinoz]

She has already shown you.

 

[tails]

trolling right? why is a boss required?

[Michael8511]

so agree with above poster Donutz. And for me you are not buying a pet or companion. The relation have to be a 2 sided street, you both have to agree with each other's as equal. My partner do the cooking and cleaning since he likes it, otherwise we talk about things and have an open and honest discussion. I don't think he is different just because he's Asian, they may think more about taking care of their elderly and I think it's a good thing that they respect their parents and take care of them since it's almost no security for them. He take care of his mother together with his 3 siblings and contribute 1.500 bath a month for her and a nephew that go to school and live with her. We go once every 2 weeks to Lotus and buy water, beer, juice, cleaning, personal items like shampoo etc. and washing detergent. Food we buy from the local market near Coloseum, eat mostly Fish, vegetables and fruit but they also have meat there and if we need pork we buy it there. All this we do together, otherwise it's mostly I who like to go out once in a while. He have no demand on getting money to buy something or getting something because he's with me. He do that because he like it as any relation in the west.

if your girlfriend starting to demand things it's time to have a serious talk with her and explain that you are not interested in a relation where she takes command and deside about spendings, it have to be a mutual thing otherwise you look for someone else.

its a lot of gold diggers out there and if she's one of those you are worth a better catch. The bars are full.

[csabo]

We were walking back to the car after movie last night and I asked her if she knew where the car was. She said "when I'm with you I use my brain zero percent."  Mission accomplished

[smotherb]

7 hours ago, MissAndry said:

 

If he's paying for her company, and she's a lot younger, and doesn't earn money herself, then he will think of her as property. Entirely understandable IMHO.

 

Completely different if they are the same age and she works to contribute to the household expenses.

What if she is a lot younger, but still works to contribute to the household? That can happen, I know.

I wouldn’t want to be with a woman who is with me only for the money. Although I have seen it literally hundreds of times, I still do not understand how a man can be a long-term customer—to be cuckolded day in and day out. Have they lost all sense of pride and think they aren’t worth loving for themselves?  It seems it must be so.

[MissAndry]

1 minute ago, smotherb said:

Have they lost all sense of pride and think they aren’t worth loving for themselves?  It seems it must be so.

 

 

I haven't noticed any old white guys worthy of loving for themselves in Thailand.

I guess there must be one or two around, but the other 99.9% seem to be OK with paying.

[csabo]

In an alternate forum the OP's gf is bragging how she has total control of her bf.

[smotherb]

Just now, MissAndry said:

 

I haven't noticed any old white guys worthy of loving for themselves in Thailand.

I guess there must be one or two around, but the other 99.9% seem to be OK with paying.

You haven't met all old white guys and perhaps those worth loving are not interested in you. There must be some mutual recognition of worth to make it happen, don't you think?.

 

However, you are right that most old and young white guys seem to be okay with paying.