what if I don't wake up tomorrow - would sleeping pills help

[Once Bitten]

I apologies if this topic seems a bit morbid

 

At 67 years of age Ive recently due to my first ever health check up and results , decided to alter my current life style with a more healthier diet and new daily exercise routine .

 

Things are progressing in the right direction and I am starting to feel the physical benefits already.

 

Having said that , one worrying side effect that has recently appeared , is that I now seem to have become fixated with the constant thought of , what if I don't wake up tomorrow.

 

As soon as I climb into bed and my head hits the pillow , I start to think may be I will die in my sleep , this new some what morbid feeling ,  I’m almost sure has been triggered by finally realizing that thanks to the first ever health check up and results ,  and my state of health combined with my advancing age, things are now not looking too good on my score board of life , contrary to my past history of good health and delusional belief that I would never prematurely die.

 

Although I currently don’t have any serious medical issues and I am trying my best to alter my life style , to hopefully prolong the number of years I have left , but I still have this nagging feeling that I will go to sleep one night soon and never wake up.

 

Now I have heard some say that the best way to die would be peacefully in your sleep, you pass away with nothing to worry about as opposed to going through a long drawn out illness to finally meet your maker, but this above view does not some how make me feel any better or reduce my apparent anxiety.

 

I’m hoping this on going nightly anxiety does not in any way contribute to or make things worse , but this constant night time occurrence is now affecting my sleep , I some times lay there for hours just mulling over the not waking up scenario to a point where I’m now wondering that , if taking some sort of sleeping pill / medication would be a good idea.

So I’m now wondering if any one here has had / is having the same worrying concerns on this same morbid subject,  but more importantly has come up with an antidote that will calm my mind and help finally remove the nagging   “ I may die in my sleep “   thoughts once and for all and will allow me to get a good nights sleep.

I know some may say , pull your self together , just get on with life , stop worrying , but I am genuinely concerned .

 

[Sheryl]

If you are going to die suddenly it can just as well occur while you are wide awake, being asleep doesn't increase the risk.

 

Sleeping pills are not a good idea. This is not a passing issue.

 

You need to come to grips with the reality of your mortality and make your peace with it.

 

Spiritual approach or psychological one, take your pick and proceed accordingly.

 

 

[4MyEgo]

Have you thought of getting a 2nd opinion if you haven't already ?

 

I had a  wake up call back in 2008 and since then have had the thought of passing coming and going and as I have a young family that I would like to watch grow, I just put the thought to the back of my mind when it rears its head, suffice to say it also makes it better that I know that they will be looked after when I am gone, but thinking of passing doesn't stop me from living and enjoying, passing is life's natural occurrence, we cannot escape it, but we have a choice to let it stay in our mind or put it in the back of our mind as a less important part of our life, so if you have had a healthy run so far, you have done well, so grab whatever life you have left in you and enjoy it, and if you pass in your sleep, you have no control over it.

 

As for the sleeping pills not a good idea, try a beer or a Vodka soda and lime before you go to bed like I do, it seems to put me down when I am watching TV in bed and when I wake, I smile 555

 

 

Edited November 20, 2016 by 4MyEgo

[Crossy]

OB, you are not alone!

 

Whilst I don't fear not waking up, I do get irrational panic attacks in the night, particularly if I cannot hear extraneous noises like the fan or aircon running, to the point of having to put the light on.

 

Recently an ear infection caused my mild deafness in one ear to become profound (temporarily), waking up in the night having laid on my good ear caused me to be totally incapable of going back to sleep or even lying down, bloody scary and totally irrational.

 

I'm an intelligent human being (OK, maybe score one from two) even so ...

 

Even lying on the duff ear didn't help

 

My hearing in the duff ear is getting progressively worse, I really have to manage the issue!

 

EDIT

 

Oh, and I get tinnitus in both ears on occasion

 

@4ME, you adulterate vodka with soda and lime? You deserve everything you get! The Russians are coming for you!!!

 

 

[MoonUnit]

2 hours ago, Once Bitten said:

I know some may say , pull your self together , just get on with life , stop worrying , but I am genuinely concerned .

 

Thank you for the reminder to get my affairs in order, Once Bitten.

 

I don't believe I'm going to keel over tomorrow or die in my sleep anytime soon, but occasionally need the reminder to ensure that my wife is taken care of if I do.  My Thai wife is a British citizen and if I do die tomorrow then she will not remain in the UK long after my demise.  I want my wife to be looked after and she certainly will be with my death in service benefit from my UK employer but I really should have a will drawn up to wrap things up.

 

I'm in my late 40s and smoke like a trooper and a free spirited person and entitled to live my life how I want, and I do. 

 

Anyway, nothing I can say or do is going to put your mind at rest, but maybe some comfort can be derived from ensuring that you are content that your affairs are in order if you do keel over before your time is up. 

 

I should also add that my mother died when I was a toddler and my sister when she was in her twenties.  I only mention this because I feel I have built up some sort of immunity through these unfortunate events as to the thought of death, as in I really don't care about such an event now.  I suppose I did well compared to my poor mother and sister, if you get my drift.

 

Try to keep yourself busy, which you allude to with a healthy plan, and I'm sure you'll be around for years to come.  Good luck.

[happynthailand]

OK, try (take)"Dormirax 25 " that should turn off your brain,you should sleep like a baby,

wake up in the morning nice and refrashed

Dormirax 25 is a mild tranquilliser,take one pill about  1/2 hour before bed

[JHolmesJr]

3 minutes ago, happynthailand said:

OK, try (take)"Dormirax 25 " that should turn off your brain,you should sleep like a baby,

wake up in the morning nice and refrashed

Dormirax 25 is a mild tranquilliser,take one pill about  1/2 hour before bed

 

can this pill make you stupid or dull the brain? I still need mine.

[tonray]

What's the worry ? If you don't wake up, you won't be bothered too much after the fact,

[4MyEgo]

14 hours ago, MoonUnit said:

 

Thank you for the reminder to get my affairs in order, Once Bitten.

 

I don't believe I'm going to keel over tomorrow or die in my sleep anytime soon, but occasionally need the reminder to ensure that my wife is taken care of if I do.  My Thai wife is a British citizen and if I do die tomorrow then she will not remain in the UK long after my demise.  I want my wife to be looked after and she certainly will be with my death in service benefit from my UK employer but I really should have a will drawn up to wrap things up.

 

I'm in my late 40s and smoke like a trooper and a free spirited person and entitled to live my life how I want, and I do. 

 

Anyway, nothing I can say or do is going to put your mind at rest, but maybe some comfort can be derived from ensuring that you are content that your affairs are in order if you do keel over before your time is up. 

 

I should also add that my mother died when I was a toddler and my sister when she was in her twenties.  I only mention this because I feel I have built up some sort of immunity through these unfortunate events as to the thought of death, as in I really don't care about such an event now.  I suppose I did well compared to my poor mother and sister, if you get my drift.

 

Try to keep yourself busy, which you allude to with a healthy plan, and I'm sure you'll be around for years to come.  Good luck.

 

Used to be a smoker from 12 to age 40, had a heart attack at 47, survived to tell you that, now 56, for what its worth, get rid of the smokes, because you are narrowing your arteries which eventually will lead to what happened to me, that or the big C, you are supporting no one but the biggest drug dealers in the world, governments, as they get the biggest slice of the pie in taxes, suffice to say I am sure you want to keep enjoying your "life" with your wife as opposed to leaving her with money, as opposed to what she has now, you in the flesh, now I am assuming money can't beat that 555

[dddave]

I'm 73 and have recently had my own get acquainted notices from the eternal gates.

I think MoonUnit has the right idea.  Get your affairs in order as the underlying cause of your anxiety could very well be all the loose ends that we all have dangling before us.

Updating documents as important as wills and life insurance policies, resolving possible debts from the past, making a comprehensive list of Bank, Brokerage and Trust accounts and especially these days, passwords to your important online accounts are all things that need to be done.  Your subconscious knows this and will torment you in it's own special way until you get this stuff done.

Dying painlessly in ones sleep is probably one of the greatest good-bye gifts anybody could get.  Just make sure you don't spoil it by leaving a chaotic mess for your survivors.

[Once Bitten]

Thanks to every one who took the time to comment and make suggestions , which I really appreciate .

 

 

 

When my head hits the pillow and my brain starts to think about the distinct possibility , although as Sheryl so aptly pointed out percentage wise not too likely,  of going to sleep and never waking up.  It starts a chain reaction of worry which seems to be divided into two areas , what will my beloved Thai family do when they realize that I’m now going to be asleep for ever , how will they cope without my loving care and daily guidance , how will my sudden departure impact of all their future daily lives
 .

The other area which I seem to think about and dwell on is , all the things I want to do when I wake up,  which I know may sound a bit silly , this mental to do list is a bit like the feeling that I get when I leave home and go on holiday , there I sit sunning my self on a sandy beach or relaxing by the pool ,  only find my self constantly thinking about all the things I need to do when I return back home.   

 

Like some here have so clearly pointed out ,  the nightly torment that I now seem to go through, is  I’m now sure related to the subject of making provisions for the inevitable day ,  so my loved one’s are not left in a state of distress and confusion .  So now getting all my affairs in order ,  where my family is concerned has to be sorted out  , which I freely admit I had never really attempted to do in the past .

As for trying to dispel or at least water down my anxiety , I’m hoping once  I have done every thing that I can now think of to put into place and set out a plan of affairs , that will hopefully help my family cope with my departure , no matter when or where it finally occurs . Hopefully just doing that will in some way help subdue  my own personal fear of going to sleep and never walking up.

The coming to grips with mortality part of it,  I may be wrong on this but I feel it may be some thing that others like my self , consider a difficult or upsetting subject to deal with , even more so for those of us that don't believe that there's an afterlife waiting for them. Personally being a fully paid up card carrying atheist , I find no comfort in religion

 

I don’t think I’m alone and I have a funny gut feeling that there’s a lot more people who may be reading my thoughts on this subject and in some way can relate to my feelings and anxiety about my fear of dying , especially those who are dealing with on going medical issues and those of us of an older age group , who are like my self now trying to alter their life styles with a view to staying healthy and delaying the inevitable knock on the door from a cloaked skeleton carrying a large scythe.

 

 

 

I suppose we could say that death provides us humans a life with meaning as with out death us humans would never feel any need to achieve or to get anything done.

 

[elliss]

On 11/20/2016 at 8:17 PM, JHolmesJr said:

 

can this pill make you stupid or dull the brain? I still need mine.

 

      Both , i should know .

      If you dont wake up ,   dont worry about it .

       Stress is  a killer .555

Edited November 21, 2016 by elliss

[MoonUnit]

15 minutes ago, Once Bitten said:

The coming to grips with mortality part of it,  I may be wrong on this but I feel it may be some thing that others like my self , consider a difficult or upsetting subject to deal with , even more so for those of us that don't believe that there's an afterlife waiting for them.

 

Oh for the days of being a carefree youth, Once Bitten.  They seem more distant everyday and we, in our more aged minds, move towards the realisation of our own mortality.

 

I can tell you that there is more to this life, and death, than your creed.  I've seen far too much but you and many others may not understand that there is far more going on in the ether than you'll understand.  It's all good by the way and I don't find it upsetting.  Just easier to accept.

[NancyL]

Make a list of all the tasks you need to do to get your affairs in order, yourself organized and your loved ones taken care of in your demise, or in the even you become incapacitated and they have to care for you, yet you're unable to communicate with them.  By having such a "to-do" list, your mind won't dwell on everything at night and you can spend your time during the day working on these tasks.  You'll have a great feeling of satisfaction as you complete each task and cross it off the list.

 

Be sure to get enough exercise and not drink too much alcohol.  Being tired at evening from exercise, rather than from drinking too much, will ensure you go to sleep quickly and have good restful sleep.

 

Medications to help you sleep should be avoided. Sure, there are "anti-anxiety" meds, but they're not intended for long-term use and will make you stupid and dependent in the long-run.  Believe me, I've seen older expats dependent on "benzos" for sleep who seem to have full blown dementia when brain scans and other tests show their only problem is the long-term benzo abuse.

[Once Bitten]

Thanks Nancy ,  with the help of your suggestions and all who replied , I have recently finished getting together and organizing every thing that I could think of,  that will hopefully make things less
stressful for my family should I depart this world , or become incapacitated and need care .

 

Doing all this has certainly lessened my night time anxiety and I now sleep a lot better.

 

[raro]

That's called catastrophic thinking and can be quite serious. Have it myself once in a while and if you allow it to grow it will live in your head rent free.

One way out is hypnotherapy, but also a very conscious "stop! I will not allow this thought to develop" can help.

There is an app called "the worry box" that can help you coping with negative or even catastrophic thoughts.

[al007]

On 11/21/2016 at 4:21 PM, dddave said:

 

Dying painlessly in ones sleep is probably one of the greatest good-bye gifts anybody could get.  Just make sure you don't spoil it by leaving a chaotic mess for your survivors.

 

Oh so true, another 7/8 yrs then to peacefully die in my sleep and painlessly, would be my dream come true

[GarryP]

13 hours ago, raro said:

That's called catastrophic thinking and can be quite serious. Have it myself once in a while and if you allow it to grow it will live in your head rent free.

One way out is hypnotherapy, but also a very conscious "stop! I will not allow this thought to develop" can help.

There is an app called "the worry box" that can help you coping with negative or even catastrophic thoughts.

 

I have found hypnosis very good for a variety of thought processes which increase anxiety, and overcoming habitual behaviour.