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Find my English dad! Thirteen year old "Emmy" just wants a cuddle


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So mummy meets a farang in Nana and gets her jollies before going her separate way... now her daughter is 13 years old she wants to meet with the same 'farang' for a 'hug'.

 

I'd better not be making any further comments on this topic.

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1 hour ago, JAG said:

 

Yes, it takes two, and I don't suppose that the mother is blameless.

 

But I'm perhaps old fashioned, and believe that if you bring a child into this world, no matter under what circumstances, you have a responsibility to that child. To walk away from that responsibility is utterly selfish and cowardly.

 

Let's face it, £100 a month would make a huge difference to the little girl in the OP.. Some  may say that it is a lot to pay for a good shag 13 years ago, well you should have considered that before getting stuck in...

I doubt however that the daughter would see much of the £100. 

It's sad for the little girl not having and not knowing her father. She certainly needs him as I have witnessed many times  how some Thais - especially young- can be cruelly racist to 'look kreung' ( half caste)

Edited by Lemonltr
omitted a word.
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1 hour ago, mikebell said:

What of the thousands of Thai children abandoned by their Thai fathers as soon as morning sickness occurs?  They move on and repeat offend and are never held to account.  Most Thai males have no paternity gene.

Two wrongs make a right ?

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On 5/31/2017 at 6:11 PM, JAG said:

 

Yes, it takes two, and I don't suppose that the mother is blameless.

 

But I'm perhaps old fashioned, and believe that if you bring a child into this world, no matter under what circumstances, you have a responsibility to that child. To walk away from that responsibility is utterly selfish and cowardly.

 

Let's face it, £100 a month would make a huge difference to the little girl in the OP.. Some  may say that it is a lot to pay for a good shag 13 years ago, well you should have considered that before getting stuck in...

I agree 100%.

 

How can you look yourself in the mirror if you abandoned your own child?? I sure as hell couldn't.

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Every live birth is a miracle and to walk away from a situation that could produce such a miracle is a crime against humanity. We are not animals mmm well most of us are not but there are quite a few that are. Nothing wrong with condoms or for those that cannot wear them they should get of the train before Central station. I am an ex PI and I have helped a few women trace their ex boyfriends that disappeared when the woman became pregnant. Most thought because they were miles away from their own countries and could do as they liked in Thailand got a big surprise. No pressure, no heavy hand, just a promise to inform their families and employers and they instantly assumed responsibility.  

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1 hour ago, tonray said:

That does not give anyone license to be a deadbeat dad.

'red-rag-to-a-bull' to any that have been shafted by family courts in the west; not least because they allow mothers to use children as weapons yet jump on fathers like a python sketch when roles are reversed.

 

https://fnf.org.uk/

 

Edited by evadgib
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1 hour ago, Dustdevil said:

This one tugs at the old heart strings. I had a Malaysian-Chinese gf about 25 years ago; we spent some time alone  in London (met her halfway, me from the US and she from Malaysia) but her rich and snobbish mom put a stop to it because I was headed for a job in Saudi Arabia. According to her superior wisdom, anybody working in KSA must be a loser. Little later I got a phone call from the girl saying she'd gotten pregnant by a local man, and later still got a card from her saying something about love and signing it with her name and "Baby Jane." I always wonder if Jane was mine but of course Snobby Grand-Mommie Dearest didn't want me near any of them. I wish I knew... and I can't find Jane's mom.

that story reminds me of my ex here. met her 2y ago, together a year and a half.. got along well but she was immature and wanted absolute constant attention or within 30 seconds it would be "back to facebook then!" for hours along with sulking. eventually she had a fit because she was in the mood and i asked her to wait 30 seconds because i was busy. she started throwing things around, shouting etc.

 

anyways, I asked for a break so I could think, she kept pushing to see me and eventually we broke up.  I got my break.

2wks later I missed her, wanted to give her another chance.. but nope! she told me "I don't have sex with someone who is not my boyfriend!" (important later)

tried a week later (she is studying so free time on weekends) nope again.

 

turned out­. one week after we broke up she met some English bloke that came here for drinking and muay thai. (tourist)

one week after that (2 weeks after we broke up) she told me her "friend" dropped her at this guy's house then left.. and she was "stuck" there for 4 days

 

long story short, the guy convinced her to have unprotected sex, pulling out. "many times" in 4 days.. the next month I get a message on Facebook. she got pregnant within 2 weeks of us breaking up!

so now, she is in university she is in university first year, will have to quit university.. her parents practically disowned her.. so can't go back home (her dad never even knew about me in 1.5 years!)

 

the way she talks to me the guy wanted to skip town very quickly but then decided "it's a cute idea to have a baby" so he sticks around and gets free sex. my bet is he will disappear sooner or later and she will be in big trouble then. she said "he doesn't hold me at night like you did" and he always leaves her to go drink with his friends during the weekend when she goes there which makes her complain to me every week.

 

I got the snip 2 years ago myself, she was a virgin and I have ALWAYS worn a condom so it's definitely not mine.. but i still feel bad for the girl.

 

 

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1 hour ago, Dustdevil said:

This one tugs at the old heart strings. I had a Malaysian-Chinese gf about 25 years ago; we spent some time alone  in London (met her halfway, me from the US and she from Malaysia) but her rich and snobbish mom put a stop to it because I was headed for a job in Saudi Arabia. According to her superior wisdom, anybody working in KSA must be a loser. Little later I got a phone call from the girl saying she'd gotten pregnant by a local man, and later still got a card from her saying something about love and signing it with her name and "Baby Jane." I always wonder if Jane was mine but of course Snobby Grand-Mommie Dearest didn't want me near any of them. I wish I knew... and I can't find Jane's mom.

Having lived in Malaysia for a spell, Malaysian Chinese moms and grandmoms need to see your family tree and your bank book before they will ever approve of you as a serious contender. 

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56 minutes ago, kekalot said:

that story reminds me of my ex here. met her 2y ago, together a year and a half.. got along well but she was immature and wanted absolute constant attention or within 30 seconds it would be "back to facebook then!" for hours along with sulking. eventually she had a fit because she was in the mood and i asked her to wait 30 seconds because i was busy. she started throwing things around, shouting etc.

 

anyways, I asked for a break so I could think, she kept pushing to see me and eventually we broke up.  I got my break.

2wks later I missed her, wanted to give her another chance.. but nope! she told me "I don't have sex with someone who is not my boyfriend!" (important later)

tried a week later (she is studying so free time on weekends) nope again.

 

turned out­. one week after we broke up she met some English bloke that came here for drinking and muay thai. (tourist)

one week after that (2 weeks after we broke up) she told me her "friend" dropped her at this guy's house then left.. and she was "stuck" there for 4 days

 

long story short, the guy convinced her to have unprotected sex, pulling out. "many times" in 4 days.. the next month I get a message on Facebook. she got pregnant within 2 weeks of us breaking up!

so now, she is in university she is in university first year, will have to quit university.. her parents practically disowned her.. so can't go back home (her dad never even knew about me in 1.5 years!)

 

the way she talks to me the guy wanted to skip town very quickly but then decided "it's a cute idea to have a baby" so he sticks around and gets free sex. my bet is he will disappear sooner or later and she will be in big trouble then. she said "he doesn't hold me at night like you did" and he always leaves her to go drink with his friends during the weekend when she goes there which makes her complain to me every week.

 

I got the snip 2 years ago myself, she was a virgin and I have ALWAYS worn a condom so it's definitely not mine.. but i still feel bad for the girl.

 

 

But you know it's not yours.  And your ex-gf sounds like a very immature little brat. Me, I'll never know--and my gf was a sweetheart. Unique too--the only girl I ever knew who talked just like Audrey Hepburn. And she had all the right curves, unlike Audrey. *sigh*

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45 minutes ago, tonray said:

Having lived in Malaysia for a spell, Malaysian Chinese moms and grandmoms need to see your family tree and your bank book before they will ever approve of you as a serious contender. 

Well...actually I lived and worked there for a spell too. I married another Chinese from KL without any background checks. My wife (now ex) did what she wanted. She didn't want to be a Chinese wife stuck in the kitchen. We were married for 15 years, not a bad stretch. I think she's fortunate to have been liberated from that narrow- and small-minded little country, a country of low expectations. Now she's a high-paid corporate exec in Houston. Good for her.

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The poor girl "misses" her vision of the ideal, kind, caring, loving father; unfortunately this vision is far removed from the character of the alleged birth father.

 

A sad story that she shares, I imagine. with many other Thai children.

 

Every child deserves loving, kind father and mother figures in their lives, even if they aren't the birth parents.

 

Luckily as well as irresponsible falangs in this country there are many responsible falangs too, who provide love for these children. Check out Catherine Ruth Riley-Bryan on Facebook, she started the Bamboo School near Kanchanaburi, about 17 years ago, it is an orphanage with about 70 children living there. No child is turned away, whatever the families religion or race. Where possible Momma Cat places the babies with suitable families. An extraordinary woman who has been honoured by the Thai people.

16106044_10158109490910486_6483905741862151394_n.jpg

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1 hour ago, cruisemonkey said:

 

How can she miss someone she has never known?

It is a bad translation. I am sure the word khit theung was used. This is always translated as "miss" but also means "think of" [a person].

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Her mother likely put her up to this looking for a pay day.  If this guy is still alive and pops his head up (and he was American) he'd immediately be charged for 13 years back child support and ordered to pay obscene amounts of money with penalties and interest under threat of prison.  Good that they only have his first name.  

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11 minutes ago, Classic Ray said:

Other benefits that might be available to her include a British passport and access to British welfare state benefits including education. It's the least he could do to support her in that having ignored her all her life. 

- She has to get there first &

 

- You're placing too much credibility in an uncorroborated story @#1

 

Edited by evadgib
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This story is about a child who would like to see her father.

All this cynicism and judgement is uncalled for.

She is an innocent child and would like to know her father.

I have European friends who have had similar experiences.

 

I wish her luck in her quest to find him.

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8 hours ago, Classic Ray said:

Other benefits that might be available to her include a British passport and access to British welfare state benefits including education. It's the least he could do to support her in that having ignored her all her life. 

It costs the best part of £1000 to get her British Citizenship.

 

He has ignored the girl for 13 years.

 

Do you think he would pay?

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12 minutes ago, JAG said:

It costs the best part of £1000 to get her British Citizenship.

 

He has ignored the girl for 13 years.

 

Do you think he would pay?

Unfortunately, probably not.

If I found myself in his position, I would want to do the best I could for the child and would expect to make financial and parental input to the child's upbringing but that wouldn't necessarily mean living with the child  full time.

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22 hours ago, NanLaew said:

Very true but this is THAI visa.  In UK child support is abstracted from the errant father; here no sanctions are taken and the mother is forced to take whatever employment she can get to provide food/education for the child abandoned by the feckless father.

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