The poisonous Brother in Law

[LannaGuy]

2 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

Hello Patong..

 

Well..I wasn't going to post today and just try to read the  replies-because,to be frank,my ticker is on its last legs which is why my Aussie doctors keep telling me to come home.

 

I have tried to cultivate a certain sense of detachment from this lunatic family but that failed miserably about an hour ago..

 

Please indulge me in this,if you can.

The family restaurant failed mainly because the entire family ate the profits.

The karaoke bar failed because the BiL drank the profits.

The chicken farm failed because the lazy stepson would not get out of bed.

Nevermind..I could cope with all that..

But the Pitbull venture has me buggered.Lazy stepson borrowed 20,000 baht to buy male/female pitbulls to breed them.

When they turned up I pointed out that they needed lots of work,socializing and a secure enclosure to house them.The villagers started to complain (who wouldn't?)Lazy bastard has np money so I paid 5,000 to get an enclosure done.Lazy son then demands 5,000 so that he can get a job in the local hardware depot.Goes for two days and then collapses.Does nothing about the pitbulls.

 

Meanwhile the Pitbulls are growing..they see all the activity outside and realize that their master doesn't give a shit about them.

 

Dogs break out this morning..and attack a female dog..and get it in a death grip..small children are running around because the lazy BiL is still MIA.

 

Useless stepson is down the road drinking Hong Thong, "The Drink Of Isaan Champions".

 

Women running around screaming but not one of them would ever say anything about the neuron deprived cretin or any other  cretinish relatives either.

 

My heart rate went thru the roof,I locked my own dog in (the original and only dog on the property) and felt my pulse soaring..

 

I only hope that I get out of here before the dogs take out a small child and I have to front up the compensation,because,naturally,no-one will have any money.

whatever happens please get out with whatever you can and live your last days with some peace

[LannaGuy]

2 hours ago, owl sees all said:

I hear you Gary loud and clear.

 

During calm pensive moments i do get the impression that my wife was shown very little love when she herself was young. Scolding, conflict, arguments and sometimes violence was the norm for her. When I tell my daughter, as I do every night before she goes to sleep, "I love you" I often hear the tut tuts of disapproval.

 

A lot of these people are very backward (from our standpoint) emotionally. I constantly give my wife freedom to burn-herself-out on some things. I feel often that my disinterest only makes things worse.

 

If you are a chess player Gary; you would understand the word 'zungwang'. I sometimes think I'm in that position.

 

make plans and book flights - peace be with you

[Odysseus123]

3 hours ago, LannaGuy said:

whatever happens please get out with whatever you can and live your last days with some peace

I tried to go four months ago but my Thai doctor-who I respect-thought that It was very medically unwise to do so.She has now provided me with the requisite reports and I booked my ticket as soon as I got home from the hospital.Nothing will improve here.

 

After the anarchic hullabaloo settled today,it was I that hobbled downstairs,found the little soi dog,cleaned her ear-nearly bitten off-and applied some antibiotic cream.She also has some sort of wound in her chest but she won't let me get near to that.I am going to try and crush up some antibiotics and put it in her food tonight.

 

The family doesn't care.Life is cheap here.

I guess it was cheap in 15th century Transylvania too...

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

17 hours ago, The Dark Lord said:

I have been outed, quelle horreur!, 

 

Not just outed in my tongue but the multiple tongues of the EU!

 

Jeez you guys, you must have had a cracking education back in the day. 

 

Humphrey plugden - French teacher - would ask me why I did not use Sacre Bleu as quelled horreur is a very dated expression

 

deigo burns - Spanish teacher would pick up his cane and use it liberally on my rear end for not being able to remember a retort in spanish

 

sorry didn't do German but Shiezzer might fit?

 

ex wife - Swedish " teacher" would expect me to come out with Fahn or hellvetta. Knulle me should be saved for the more emotional moments

 

anyway guys I survived another night and another round of hysterical screaming at the door inviting me ( predominantly) to leave the premesis on a permanent basis.

 

so there's the good bit.

 

what I still cannot get my head around is the utter miscarriage of justice. If I had done anything wrong then I accept my punishment / fate but hellfire saying to a hippo sized woman with " a puss like a busted cooch" ( face like a broken settee) "I like your shirt and your hair looks better down than up" hardly represents fornication or the behaviour of a libidinous swine. 

 

With a 17 year proven track record of keeping " little brother" firmly behind the zipper as well on what basis can I therefore be subject to such nasty abuse?

 

in my mind is she trying to oust me to make way for the next sucker? If so good luck to him but I doubt that's the case. Applying logic is never wise when trying to understand a woman's behaviour let alone a rabidlymaniacal psychopath.

 

i don't suppose anyone here reads the DM that you get for free on your iPad? If you did there was a rather pertinent article as to how you can tell if your partner is a psychopath.

 

boy did it tick all the boxes!

 

moving on though, you guys have painted some beautiful pictures of how life should be. Sadly once it was similar to that but no longer.

 

Enjoying the wonder of the sunrise, the chanting if the monks, the peace of the morning mist burning off the rice fields, the power of the thunderstorms cannot be done when you have someone who honestly must be bordering on the insane line nearby spewing their venomous bile and hatred at you for an imagined crime. 

 

At at least I am not getting the bedroom door knocked down with a lump hammer today. What galls the most is it is my lumphamner

 

 

Have you tried the library? See below.

Best of luck, sounds like you need it...

 

 

Shoe - Mysteries.docx

Edited July 5, 2017 by George FmplesdaCosteedback

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

5 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

I tried to go four months ago but my Thai doctor-who I respect-thought that It was very medically unwise to do so.She has now provided me with the requisite reports and I booked my ticket as soon as I got home from the hospital.Nothing will improve here.

 

After the anarchic hullabaloo settled today,it was I that hobbled downstairs,found the little soi dog,cleaned her ear-nearly bitten off-and applied some antibiotic cream.She also has some sort of wound in her chest but she won't let me get near to that.I am going to try and crush up some antibiotics and put it in her food tonight.

 

The family doesn't care.Life is cheap here.

I guess it was cheap in 15th century Transylvania too...

I am not trying to make light of the situation, but thought you needed something to break the tension for a minute.

You have to get out, stick a few of your most  precious things and a jumper for the plane in a small bag and grab a taxi. Tell them you are going to the post office or something so you need to take your passport. Take the taxi to the post office and when it goes get one to the airport.

Leave it late so you are away before they can stop you not sat in departure.

 

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

16 hours ago, NanLaew said:

This is the generic version. There's a Thai one as well.

 

Excellent! You had me laughing for several minutes.

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

16 hours ago, transam said:

I am not in anyway religious except one belief that has followed me. That is..

"What goes around, comes around"....Have instilled that into Mrs.Trans and when she tells me about family and other stuff l then motion two circles with my hand...She now actually believes it, which is good for me.. 

 

I am sort of lucky her family are not nice people, because l do not now entertain them in any way..

Mrs.Trans often says she cannot believe they are her family...

We are now a little off topic, and it's about good person in need of some support:

Interesting what you use as a "code of life". Of course the concept is in most religions but explained in different ways. Heaven and Hell, reincarnation as a cockroach, or forty virgins waiting for you for murdering innocent heathen swine in the name of allah (err sorry, maybe that one's the opposite).

Our friend has done his bit with this family time and again over years, he needs to look after himself before their self destruction obsession drags him into the abyss with them. I worry he seems to be teetering on the edge. It Is decision time, sink or swim.

Love is not about only giving, it is about respect. It seems his generosity has lost him any respect unfortunately.

They have had more than their pound of flesh, time to leave with no regret.

Get out while you still have the force with you Dark Lord.

Don't forget you bank books...

 

Edited July 5, 2017 by George FmplesdaCosteedback

[The Dark Lord]

4 hours ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

We are now a little off topic, and it's about good person in need of some support:

Interesting what you use as a "code of life". Of course the concept is in most religions but explained in different ways. Heaven and Hell, reincarnation as a cockroach, or forty virgins waiting for you for murdering innocent heathen swine in the name of allah (err sorry, maybe that one's the opposite).

Our friend has done his bit with this family time and again over years, he needs to look after himself before their self destruction obsession drags him into the abyss with them. I worry he seems to be teetering on the edge. It Is decision time, sink or swim.

Love is not about only giving, it is about respect. It seems his generosity has lost him any respect unfortunately.

They have had more than their pound of flesh, time to leave with no regret.

Get out while you still have the force with you Dark Lord.

Don't forget you bank books...

 

Hi GFC and welcome, if that is appropriate, to the thread. 

 

You are right in so in so many ways here, firstly with the cartoon which made me smile but then with the astute observation  about my state of mind. I continue to have that guilt trip that is so deeply embedded in my soul that I cannot get rid which keeps reminding me that when I leave she will spiral very quickly into abject poverty and suffering having squandered obscene amounts of money on clothes, shoes handbags and friends despite my multiple warnings that the "fountain of tang" was not endless. 

 

Then on the other hand my brain tells me that to stay here is going to end in tears, possible injury and definite misery right up to the time when the old body finally checks out.

 

i certainly am beginning to understand what it must be like to have a dual personality. 

 

I take your point about just geabbing the essentials however however how do you explain " going to the post office" with two treble and two bass guitars ( value about $2k each) in your hands?

 

what I have sorted so far is;

 

a) fully packed

 4wd car hire at about Bht 1000 per day ( need the space) 

 

what i I need to try and sort out now is somewhere to drop my cases and guitars, amps etc off for safe keeping whilst I bugger off back to civilisation for a quick break.

 

off on to the internet shortly.

 

thanks guys.

[Odysseus123]

6 hours ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

I am not trying to make light of the situation, but thought you needed something to break the tension for a minute.

You have to get out, stick a few of your most  precious things and a jumper for the plane in a small bag and grab a taxi. Tell them you are going to the post office or something so you need to take your passport. Take the taxi to the post office and when it goes get one to the airport.

Leave it late so you are away before they can stop you not sat in departure.

 

George,

Thank you for your kindly advice.

Escaping one legged men are easy to spot at airports -because they make the alarms go beep..beep..beep...

 

I am okay and on track for departure.I guess that I was just putting in my final two-bob's worth of opinion on Thai right brained thinking.

 

Once I fall into the clutches of the left brainers at the other end....well..that will be another story entirely.

 

I do long to see Oz's beautiful blue skies and vast vistas one more time.

[marko kok prong]

On 7/5/2017 at 0:53 PM, Odysseus123 said:

Hello Patong..

 

Well..I wasn't going to post today and just try to read the  replies-because,to be frank,my ticker is on its last legs which is why my Aussie doctors keep telling me to come home.

 

I have tried to cultivate a certain sense of detachment from this lunatic family but that failed miserably about an hour ago..

 

Please indulge me in this,if you can.

The family restaurant failed mainly because the entire family ate the profits.

The karaoke bar failed because the BiL drank the profits.

The chicken farm failed because the lazy stepson would not get out of bed.

Nevermind..I could cope with all that..

But the Pitbull venture has me buggered.Lazy stepson borrowed 20,000 baht to buy male/female pitbulls to breed them.

When they turned up I pointed out that they needed lots of work,socializing and a secure enclosure to house them.The villagers started to complain (who wouldn't?)Lazy bastard has np money so I paid 5,000 to get an enclosure done.Lazy son then demands 5,000 so that he can get a job in the local hardware depot.Goes for two days and then collapses.Does nothing about the pitbulls.

 

Meanwhile the Pitbulls are growing..they see all the activity outside and realize that their master doesn't give a shit about them.

 

Dogs break out this morning..and attack a female dog..and get it in a death grip..small children are running around because the lazy BiL is still MIA.

 

Useless stepson is down the road drinking Hong Thong, "The Drink Of Isaan Champions".

 

Women running around screaming but not one of them would ever say anything about the neuron deprived cretin or any other  cretinish relatives either.

 

My heart rate went thru the roof,I locked my own dog in (the original and only dog on the property) and felt my pulse soaring..

 

I only hope that I get out of here before the dogs take out a small child and I have to front up the compensation,because,naturally,no-one will have any money.

Could you maybe wait a while and not feed the dogs for a few days,then ply the stepson with copious amounts of hong Tong and Lao khao,when he eventually passes out leave him near the pitbull enclosure and slip the gate open,a tragic accident,you will of course be expected to pay for the funeral,but think of the satisfaction. It is well known to other posters who have read my post's how my ex father in law attacked and tried to kill me,which finished my marriage,some months later i saw him driving his beaten up side car combination along,oops,i must of passed to close,he ended up in the ditch,shaken but not dead,i don't think he knew it was me,,well i never heard anything,apart from he was asking my ex wife for money for a new one,through the grapevine,but by then she was out of money,had to sell her car just to live,remember revenge is a dish best served cold.

[Odysseus123]

3 hours ago, marko kok prong said:

Could you maybe wait a while and not feed the dogs for a few days,then ply the stepson with copious amounts of hong Tong and Lao khao,when he eventually passes out leave him near the pitbull enclosure and slip the gate open,a tragic accident,you will of course be expected to pay for the funeral,but think of the satisfaction. It is well known to other posters who have read my post's how my ex father in law attacked and tried to kill me,which finished my marriage,some months later i saw him driving his beaten up side car combination along,oops,i must of passed to close,he ended up in the ditch,shaken but not dead,i don't think he knew it was me,,well i never heard anything,apart from he was asking my ex wife for money for a new one,through the grapevine,but by then she was out of money,had to sell her car just to live,remember revenge is a dish best served cold.

Marko,

 

Indeed,revenge is a dish best eaten cold..and you won't get an argument from me on that one.

I am glad that you got some measure of retribution but,alas,I am going to let it slide because I need to keep my eyes locked firmly on the objective.

 

Of course,this is what most of us do as it is in our intellectual DNA and we cannot change where we come from and neither,apparently, can the right brained Thai.It is good to have a mix..rational/logical versus imaginative/artistic etc. but I have only met a few Thai up here who even try to meet you half way on that point.

 

I often wondered-back there in the 90's- exactly why I was reading Julian Jaynes' "The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind." but now realize that I was unconsciously preparing myself for a  family orientated combat course in Thailand!

 

Keep well, stay safe,live long and prosper.

 

 

Edited July 6, 2017 by Odysseus123
spelling

[GarryP]

3 hours ago, marko kok prong said:

Could you maybe wait a while and not feed the dogs for a few days,then ply the stepson with copious amounts of hong Tong and Lao khao,when he eventually passes out leave him near the pitbull enclosure and slip the gate open,a tragic accident,you will of course be expected to pay for the funeral,but think of the satisfaction. It is well known to other posters who have read my post's how my ex father in law attacked and tried to kill me,which finished my marriage,some months later i saw him driving his beaten up side car combination along,oops,i must of passed to close,he ended up in the ditch,shaken but not dead,i don't think he knew it was me,,well i never heard anything,apart from he was asking my ex wife for money for a new one,through the grapevine,but by then she was out of money,had to sell her car just to live,remember revenge is a dish best served cold.

Really? Attacked by your ex father-in-law. I missed that. Wow!!! With a weapon? I can't get my mind around that.

[Been there done that]

46 minutes ago, GarryP said:

Really? Attacked by your ex father-in-law. I missed that. Wow!!! With a weapon? I can't get my mind around that.

Which decent person can ?

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

Planning is the main thing to escape. Revenge can wait, as it will likely come without any help, and make the dish sweeter knowing you can never be blamed. I can't condone murder however much it seems to be deserved.

A good friend they are unaware of can always help to stash precious instruments and bulky prized possessions, but getting them out of the house needs thought.

Thais are not so bright in general and lazy if it doesn't seem something that will make quick money if they can get it without any effort elsewhere.

I am sure you are more than clever enough to outwit this bunch of blood suckers.

 

I escaped from Amnat with a gun toting (almost brother in law) intent on killing me way back in the early 90s. Briefly he had stolen the money for the wedding party which I had given to my intended's mother, so his sister helped my escape when he came looking for more!. To be honest when we went to Amnat he was supposed to be in the local monkey house on various charges for some time to come, but had been unexpectedly released.

He passed on the message 'never come to Amnat again', and I sent the reply, 'never to come to Bangkok or you will be treated just the same'.

Never saw or heard from him again.

 

Good luck, and take care. Have no regrets, they have brought this on themselves.

 

 

 

Edited July 6, 2017 by George FmplesdaCosteedback
more info

[joecoolfrog]

On Tuesday, July 04, 2017 at 3:14 AM, Odysseus123 said:

Hmmm...

 

Not so good.My wife tried to drive us off a bridge once merely because a Thai Baptist lady stopped to talk to me when I was in hospital.The wild west,eh?

 

If we take Madusa's post as a starting point and envisage a lot of subsistence farmers and hunter gatherers sitting around swapping yarns and telling tall tales as a way of life for generations (chuck in the Lao Kow for free) then we are probably close to the source of the manifold fantasies.Toss in the colour and love of drama and you can get a most potent (and dangerous) brew!

I think you need add to the mix the influence of religion , the people are brainwashed into believing that acceptance in this life will be rewarded in the next. As Marx said , it is the Opium of the people , and very useful in keeping the 'peasants ' in their 'place '

To be fair things are changing , foreign influence has diluted the message and for many young Thais consumerism  is the new religion . However many rural Thais are pretty conservative , customs dont die overnight.

[joecoolfrog]

On Tuesday, July 04, 2017 at 7:02 AM, The Dark Lord said:

Ah wise one, I can only but bow to your wisdom ( no I am not taking the piss) I have tried and failed to come to grips with the fact that everything that goes wrong, irrespective of he perpetrator of said wrong, I get it in the neck. 

 

Way back when the current (?) Mrs DL and I were walking out if some thai bird even fluttered an eyelid in my direction, I got the cackar. We even had ( whilst living in the UK) some daft tart come around with her ( I assume) boyfriend. They were in our house no more than one hour. On meeting them at the door I took their coats ( snow on the ground) and hung them up, I then offered them a drink and then sat down to myself because either they didn't or preferred not to talk English. 

 

Two days later old fifi the bird phones my wife up and tells her that I wanted to sleep with her because I took her coat and offered her a drink!

 

My wife hit the roof with me and I got piles of shit and abuse for over a week. 

 

What the hell is wrong wrong with them? Fifi for her decidedly overactive imagination as well as Mrs DL for believing that crap from someone she has just met?

 

sorry but they are totally screwed up as a race (I can only talk about Issan as that is my experience) 

 

it is said everyone has a limit. Well I believe I have now reached mine. So for the soon to be former Mrs DL there will be no new house in Rayong, No new BMW in the drive, no more money making schemes that consist of "borrowing" vast sums from me then  handing it out like a man with no arms to any and all Facebook scammers that happen to catch her eye. In fact there will be nothing. I know I will get criticism from some, maybe many but when my six month old £1000 laptop is hurled accross the room, cars stolen by family, money disappearing from my wallet to help the son and daughter etc etc etc I am finding it difficult to find any reason to go on supporting her. 

 

I also noted whilst upgrading her iPad at her request that there were a whole host of Captains and Majors from the USArmy looking for a freind on her FB account.

 

i don't for one minute believe any are actually us military but what double standards are in play here.

 

and so as to remove any element of doubt, I am not a handsome guy and have never strayed either in body or mind from her in our 17 years. Why then am I repeatedly accused in public of being an old man with a snakes head or a butterfly? It's just crap talk

 

nah the double standards and the ability to lie about the facts to the freinds (FBI friends) has reached My limit. 

 

Sorry for pouring out my angst , most of you don't deserve it but use it as a warning. 

After the last failed relationship , nice girl but beaten down by the demands of her 'friends' and family , I decided never again.

Gone native , just friends / giks now but still the shit happens ! In the last week a friend stood me up ( because apparently another friend told her I liked her better ) and a Gik ( who swore she wasnt after anything other than casual fun ) screamed abuse at me for an hour because I had been chatting to somebody on Messenger. Note that she didn't actually know who I was chatting with , may have been my mum or sister but that didn't seem to matter.

They are pretty much all bat shit crazy but what can you do 555

[oldhippy]

My wife always tells me how in Thailand children "take care" of their parents.

A truly wonderful part of Thai culture.

Then her lazy "I am so entitled" son from BKK moves in with us.

Guess who "takes care" of who now?

 

Wife now sleeps in the annex, because I questioned her about that wonderful part of Thai culture. You no like my family ! - does that sound familiar?

And the "I am so entitled" son is upset with me because I said I was not happy with him borrowing my car in the afternoon, and bringing it back only the next day - no, he never asked, he just took it.

 

Of course I realize that all this is nothing, as compared to some horror stories that I read in this thread.

Lucky me 555.

There was a time when I would never put up with shyt like this, I would just show my back and leave.

But at the age of 66, options become fewer and fewer.

I just came back from 3 months in Europe, wife had told me to cancel her ticket, next changed her mind, but I told her "no can".

Had a great week after my return, then came the car borrowing episode.

I am so tired of walking on eggs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Odysseus123]

Old Hippy,

"I am so tired of walking on eggs.."

 

Yes,that's it-the tremendous energy one consumes tiptoeing on eggs/shells.

 

I have been trying to be as quiet as possible the last few days because these wretched angina attacks  are increasing.They come at around 3 am most nights so it is "at rest" and not "on exertion:"Heaven knows what the malignant melanoma is doing..

 

Anyway,I had one last night and it kinda ruins one's whole day.That did not stop me from unleashing a tremendous rant about the stepson who STILL has not taken the pit bulls out of their cage and exercised them or at least show them care and attention.

 

I hate the way that they treat dogs.

 

I am reminded of Thomas Hobbes classic description of a lawless society.."Life is poor,nasty,brutal and short."Yep, that just about sums it up and describes their driving practices too.

[owl sees all]

52 minutes ago, oldhippy said:

And the "I am so entitled" son is upset with me because I said I was not happy with him borrowing my car in the afternoon, and bringing it back only the next day - no, he never asked, he just took it.

In the first couple of months of being married I had a similar experience.

 

I had bought a motor bike and it was parked outside the M-in-L's house with the keys in it. One of the wife's sisters' daughters jumped on and went off for 10 minutes (her own bike was parked outside also). When she came back someone else took (borrowed) it. An hour later and 5/6 borrows later the wife approached. Give me 100 Bhat for some benzine for the bike; it's almost empty (or similar words).

 

I asked her why they were not using the other bike. Low on benzine she replied. I got on my bike rode to the shop and put one bottle of petrol in my bike and brought back a bottle (about one litre) for the other bike. I poured it in and took back the bottle.

 

On return I very nonchalantly I parked the bike up but this time put the keys in my pocket; unnoticed. Soon someone jumped onto the bike; No keys!! She went and complained to the wife. I told the wife to tell her to use their own bike as I've just put petrol in it. "They like your bike 'cause it is new." I stood firm. "No!" Wife was big upset for the rest of the day. 'Thainess!!'

 

Even to this day no-one can use my bike or pick-up without asking me. They have got me back many times over though with other stuff.

 

footnote; not one person came to me and asked either to use the bike or for the keys. 

Edited July 7, 2017 by owl sees all

[colinneil]

3 minutes ago, owl sees all said:

In the first couple of months of being married I had a similar experience.

 

I had bought a motor bike and it was parked outside the M-in-L's house with the keys in it. One of the wife's sisters' daughters jumped on and went off for 10 minutes (her own bike was parked outside also). When she came back someone else took (borrowed) it. An hour later and 5/6 borrows later the wife approached. Give me 100 Bhat for some benzine for the bike; it's almost empty (or similar words).

 

I asked her why they were not using the other bike. Low on benzine she replied. I got on my bike rode to the shop and put one bottle of petrol in my bike and brought back a bottle (about one litre) for the other bike. I poured it in and took back the bottle.

 

On return I very nonchalantly I parked the bike up but this time put the keys in my pocket; unnoticed. Soon someone jumped onto the bike; No keys!! She went and complained to the wife. I told the wife to tell her to use their own bike as I've just put petrol in it. "They like your bike 'cause it is new." I stood firm. "No!" Wife was big upset for the rest of the day. 'Thainess!!'

 

Even to this day no-one can use my bike or pick-up without asking me. They have got me back many times over though with other stuff.

 

footnote; not one person came to me and asked either to use the bike or for the keys. 

Not only you my friend, we used to have the same problem, not any more.

I had an electric motor fitted to the gate, nobody gets in without adsking.

Even when family ask i will not open it ( only opened by wife when she is home).

We bought a new pickup, first day it was here wifes sister came to me !!khun jair !! the second word was off.

You have your own, use it, but your is new, mine very old.

[oldcarguy]

Crazy thing is Thai working men seem to get the same BS  from the lazy relatives......

 

its not just us !

[owl sees all]

15 minutes ago, colinneil said:

Not only you my friend, we used to have the same problem, not any more.

I had an electric motor fitted to the gate, nobody gets in without adsking.

Even when family ask i will not open it ( only opened by wife when she is home).

We bought a new pickup, first day it was here wifes sister came to me !!khun jair !! the second word was off.

You have your own, use it, but your is new, mine very old.

A familiar, sad story again. Why sad? Well for me it's the reluctance/inability of the wives to actually 'stand by their man' where the family are concerned.

 

In my case I''d only been married a matter of weeks. It could have been so easy for the wife to take my side. But she didn't!! Instead she got upset with me.

 

Returning to the OP. I bought the useless B-in-L out of custody in Laos. Two months later he and the M-in-L were on their knees begging for dosh for a business. I reluctantly obliged and have regretted it ever since. 

 

BUT in all this I think they are the losers. I'm still here alive and kicking, happy and with a decent pension. They (yes; more than one B-in-L) still have nothing and have shot their bolts.

[LannaGuy]

41 minutes ago, owl sees all said:

In the first couple of months of being married I had a similar experience.

 

I had bought a motor bike and it was parked outside the M-in-L's house with the keys in it. One of the wife's sisters' daughters jumped on and went off for 10 minutes (her own bike was parked outside also). When she came back someone else took (borrowed) it. An hour later and 5/6 borrows later the wife approached. Give me 100 Bhat for some benzine for the bike; it's almost empty (or similar words).

 

I asked her why they were not using the other bike. Low on benzine she replied. I got on my bike rode to the shop and put one bottle of petrol in my bike and brought back a bottle (about one litre) for the other bike. I poured it in and took back the bottle.

 

On return I very nonchalantly I parked the bike up but this time put the keys in my pocket; unnoticed. Soon someone jumped onto the bike; No keys!! She went and complained to the wife. I told the wife to tell her to use their own bike as I've just put petrol in it. "They like your bike 'cause it is new." I stood firm. "No!" Wife was big upset for the rest of the day. 'Thainess!!'

 

Even to this day no-one can use my bike or pick-up without asking me. They have got me back many times over though with other stuff.

 

footnote; not one person came to me and asked either to use the bike or for the keys. 

"Thainess" but all of this should have fair warned you that getting hitched was not the best decision you have made. Hope to hear soon you are out of it.

[zoza]

25 minutes ago, oldhippy said:

My wife always tells me how in Thailand children "take care" of their parents.

A truly wonderful part of Thai culture.

Then her lazy "I am so entitled" son from BKK moves in with us.

Guess who "takes care" of who now?

 

Wife now sleeps in the annex, because I questioned her about that wonderful part of Thai culture. You no like my family ! - does that sound familiar?

And the "I am so entitled" son is upset with me because I said I was not happy with him borrowing my car in the afternoon, and bringing it back only the next day - no, he never asked, he just took it.

 

Of course I realize that all this is nothing, as compared to some horror stories that I read in this thread.

Lucky me 555.

There was a time when I would never put up with shyt like this, I would just show my back and leave.

But at the age of 66, options become fewer and fewer.

I just came back from 3 months in Europe, wife had told me to cancel her ticket, next changed her mind, but I told her "no can".

Had a great week after my return, then came the car borrowing episode.

I am so tired of walking on eggs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

oldhippy

I do not think the spoilt son syndrome ever ends you can only get over it, when I first met my wife's young son he wanted to

be a footballer, so one day in the village me and him and a few of his mates had a bit of a kick about....I was quite new to Thailand 

and I did not get Thainess  so although I was getting on I did show off a bit as I used to play a lot.

The next week he did not want to be a footballer ? he talked about being a ladyboy?

over the next few years he went increasingly off the rails by going on the whisky /wacky backy/stealing money/no school

and when I went to the house in the village I spotted a sword in his room? and when I asked I was told he had "Ghosts" ?

I told my wife if he ever had problems with his "Ghosts" that he would have to either pay or go to jail as I was not going to fund him.

yes it did happen and lucky enough it was not the sword but a bottle I gave my wife five thousand bhat and told her if it was not enough

he would go to jail before I paid any more.....lucky enough it was only stitches in the other boy.

after spending a few months in the village I noticed he was not about and found him in a hammock at the S I L house while every one

else worked so I gave my wife an ultimation that either he goes with his Dad in Bangkok (to work) or I go.

this has continued along with various incidents involving buying motorbikes/ borrowing money/ and then doing his army stint

his last venture was money to pay an agent to go and get work in Korea but he had defaulted on his last loan so house rules are

no more money to any family member while there is any outstanding payments. no exceptions.

he is in Bangkok with his dad, and is a nice lad but Thai boys are treated like gods and although this might seem ok to some I am

always drawn to the way my Mother used to treat us for the most part and she would say "A FAT CAT IS NO GOOD TO ANYONE" 

we all learned to work in market gardens and deliver newspapers jobs that got us ready for the real world

 

a Farang lad in the same village disables his car/motorbike after checking the miles he realised they were in constant use when

he was at work in the UK it is just Thainess and the best way is stop giving them the opportunity to take your stuff whether it is

for an hour or a week, if the batteries or other parts are absent there is no problems no arguments, you will not convince them

but you can outmaneuver them.    

[LannaGuy]

6 minutes ago, zoza said:

oldhippy

I do not think the spoilt son syndrome ever ends you can only get over it, when I first met my wife's young son he wanted to

be a footballer, so one day in the village me and him and a few of his mates had a bit of a kick about....I was quite new to Thailand 

and I did not get Thainess  so although I was getting on I did show off a bit as I used to play a lot.

The next week he did not want to be a footballer ? he talked about being a ladyboy?

over the next few years he went increasingly off the rails by going on the whisky /wacky backy/stealing money/no school

and when I went to the house in the village I spotted a sword in his room? and when I asked I was told he had "Ghosts" ?

I told my wife if he ever had problems with his "Ghosts" that he would have to either pay or go to jail as I was not going to fund him.

yes it did happen and lucky enough it was not the sword but a bottle I gave my wife five thousand bhat and told her if it was not enough

he would go to jail before I paid any more.....lucky enough it was only stitches in the other boy.

after spending a few months in the village I noticed he was not about and found him in a hammock at the S I L house while every one

else worked so I gave my wife an ultimation that either he goes with his Dad in Bangkok (to work) or I go.

this has continued along with various incidents involving buying motorbikes/ borrowing money/ and then doing his army stint

his last venture was money to pay an agent to go and get work in Korea but he had defaulted on his last loan so house rules are

no more money to any family member while there is any outstanding payments. no exceptions.

he is in Bangkok with his dad, and is a nice lad but Thai boys are treated like gods and although this might seem ok to some I am

always drawn to the way my Mother used to treat us for the most part and she would say "A FAT CAT IS NO GOOD TO ANYONE" 

we all learned to work in market gardens and deliver newspapers jobs that got us ready for the real world

 

a Farang lad in the same village disables his car/motorbike after checking the miles he realised they were in constant use when

he was at work in the UK it is just Thainess and the best way is stop giving them the opportunity to take your stuff whether it is

for an hour or a week, if the batteries or other parts are absent there is no problems no arguments, you will not convince them

but you can outmaneuver them.    

All well and good but better not to set up with a Thai in the first place? like you say you can't beat 'Thainess' so why bother?  you will NEVER be Thai or equal to them (as they are God's chosen) so relax, have fun and stay free

[owl sees all]

20 minutes ago, LannaGuy said:

"Thainess" but all of this should have fair warned you that getting hitched was not the best decision you have made. Hope to hear soon you are out of it.

Thanks for your kind hopes. Bang on; not the best for sure.

 

I probably would do things differently - as would most of us - but I've a wonderful daughter now (7 years old) and I'm very proud of her.

 

I've also created a life here in Isaan with the 70 rai farm and the village.

 

I would like my wife to support me sometimes.

[Damrongsak]

Just skimming over this long thread, I'm glad my wife is of Vietnamese stock, though she was born in Thailand.  She has half-Thai siblings.  Seems like the problems are now coming from the kids of her half-Thai siblings who married Thais.  One nephew recently ran off with some of his Mom's emergency gold stash.  Her other kid wrecked his motorcycle for the second time (drunk) and did a few days in the hospital. 

 

The half-Thai brother in law is great, but he married a Thai of less than sterling reputation.  Their two kids are a piece of work.  Too bad we sponsored them to come to the USA.  The girl could make big bucks in Pattaya.  The boy couldn't do yard work without destroying my lawn mower and weed eater, despite his upbringing in a motorcycle shop in Thailand.

[Andrew Dwyer]

Just skimming over this long thread, I'm glad my wife is of Vietnamese stock, though she was born in Thailand.  She has half-Thai siblings.  Seems like the problems are now coming from the kids of her half-Thai siblings who married Thais.  One nephew recently ran off with some of his Mom's emergency gold stash.  Her other kid wrecked his motorcycle for the second time (drunk) and did a few days in the hospital. 
 
The half-Thai brother in law is great, but he married a Thai of less than sterling reputation.  Their two kids are a piece of work.  Too bad we sponsored them to come to the USA.  The girl could make big bucks in Pattaya.  The boy couldn't do yard work without destroying my lawn mower and weed eater, despite his upbringing in a motorcycle shop in Thailand.

That old adage:
" if you want to get out of yard work, do it badly !! "

[BEVUP]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

A familiar, sad story again. Why sad? Well for me it's the reluctance/inability of the wives to actually 'stand by their man' where the family are concerned.

 

In my case I''d only been married a matter of weeks. It could have been so easy for the wife to take my side. But she didn't!! Instead she got upset with me.

 

Returning to the OP. I bought the useless B-in-L out of custody in Laos. Two months later he and the M-in-L were on their knees begging for dosh for a business. I reluctantly obliged and have regretted it ever since. 

 

BUT in all this I think they are the losers. I'm still here alive and kicking, happy and with a decent pension. They (yes; more than one B-in-L) still have nothing and have shot their bolts.

Very true it's about stature & money

[Damrongsak]

39 minutes ago, Andrew Dwyer said:

That old adage:
" if you want to get out of yard work, do it badly !! "

You bet.  Been mowing lawns and chopping weeds and snakes since I was about 12 years old.  Then I got a college degree in Horticulture and said "screw turf grass".  I did take a grad-level course in weed science, so I can defend myself if neighbors complain.

 

The niece I refer to came over to the US as a pudgy kid with funny glasses.  Five years later she became the first citizen as soon as she could.  Drives a Mini, lets her Dad (who works as a cook in a Thai restaurant) pay for everything and looks like a real fox.  Her English is excellent, or at least taunting.  Spendthrift like her Mom. Her Dad repairs cars on his day off to get ahead.