Thai Divorce Law

[simon43]

I wonder if anyone on this forum has some knowledge about Thai divorce laws? Specifically, is it easy and straightforward for a Thai woman to divorce her Thai husband, if they have been living apart (by agreement) for 5 years.

I'm trying to help my Thai wife's sister, who has a marital problem. Sure, she can go and consult a Thai lawyer. But I'm looking for some initial advice that might put her on the right track before she goes and starts paying out

Quick bit of background info:

5 years ago this woman married a Thai guy and they soon had a daughter. However, husband gambled, drank etc and they soon split up to live separate lives. The young daughter was looked after by the husband's family members, whilst the wife paid for all the daughter's expenses. (His family lived close by, so the agreement was ok for all parties and his inlaws seemed reasonable people).

Then the husband's family moved to another province and took the little girl with them. The mother continued to pay for her upbringing, but was only able to visit her daughter once or twice a year. Also, she had now formed a serious relationship with another Thai man, and together they bought a house and started a business together.But she was always unhappy that her daughter did not live with her.

Anyway, bringing the story up to the present day, the woman had discussed divorce with her husband. He had agreed to this without condition. So yesterday my wife and I drove this woman to visit her daughter and to sign the divorce papers with her husband. (Long journey, very hot...)

However, the guy had changed his mind. He now wanted 50,000 baht before he would sign the papers. Shouting match between them and many tears from the woman who had hoped that the meeting would resolve the problem.

The issue of the daughter is not the most important thing, because she is looked after quite well by the husband's family, so the woman can accept that her daughter will not live with her. But she is trying to look to the future with the man she now lives with and with whom she has a growing business.

This woman assumes that she cannot divorce this guy unless he agrees to it. But is this correct under Thai law? I would have thought (hopeful here..), that since they have lived apart for 5 years, he could not oppose a divorce process initiated by the woman.

Any comments on this one? I'm really trying to understand what rights (if any), the Thai lady has in respect of divorcing her husband.

Thanks

Simon

[Richard Hall]

As per my knowledge other than in Western countries divorce requires that BOTH parties agree and sign. If this is the case then it is very quick and easy.

That blackmailing by asking for money to agree to the divorce appears to be quite common here particularly if one is into drinking and gambling.

Proposal: The mother takes the daughter to live with her right away and separates her from the husbands family. As the mother she has this right because in Thailand usually when it comes to children only the mother is significant. Simultaneously, she stops the payments and the other party has nothing on hand anymore to ask for cash. Possibly, they (including the husband) lose eventually their interest realizing that the money source has dried out and the price gets lower or just drops the demand entirely. Obviously, a better solution and cheaper than a court case. Even if the problem is only the husband and not his family at all they may urge him to get just get rid of his former wife particularly after being so crude to take her daughter with her. Possibly, however, the family has even made the husband to change his mind and that's why he is asking for the money now. Don't forget family relations are very significant here and therefore there can come great influence from this side seeing all of a sudden some long term income fading away.

Whatever you are going to do the mother should take the daughter to her as the very first step and stop the payments.

Good luck.

[mouse]

My sister in law is going through this and it was my understanding that she did not live under one roof with her spouse for one year and did not accept any financial assistance from him she could go to the Amphur and request to be divorced. Based on those facts alone the divorce would be granted. The child would of course be another story. I suspect that one should not make the mistake and take the future mate with them on such a trip to discuss the matter for it could bring some obnoxious feeling out of either party. Good luck. As for the child I understand that it is very common for the children to be used as a weapon in this society just as they are in ours. Unfortunately they are the only ones that suffer as a result.

[sbk]

I had always understood the law that the man could divorce the woman (even if she doesn't agree) if she is caught cheating on him. The woman, however, could only divorce her husband (without his agreement) if he is supporting another woman as his wife (ie mia noi).

This law may have changed a few years ago when Thailand liberalized it's laws towards women, I don't know. If he is living with another woman, it is worth a shot anyway.

[Chaamman]

Simon43

Assuming you want to get involved and get custody of the child for your wife's family then it will come down to money.

My advice is to go with your wife and someone that is fluent in Thai and English and negotiate with kid gloves (remember you are in Thailand and they regard "Face" above all things).

I reckon you could be in the thick of this domestic for sometime.

Depending on where you are, if you are stuck and require someone (a solictor Thai) that is fluent in Thai and English I will gladly give you his details.

Best of Luck

[lopburi3]

I'm trying to help my Thai wife's sister, who has a marital problem.

Not mental problem (yet). I also read it wrong the first pass.

[Chaamman]

Thanks Lopburi3 I have edited the reply.

[simon43]

Thanks for all your helpful replies. Just to emphasize that I'm on the fringes of this issue and not a relevant party in the divorce or caring for the daughter! I'm just trying to advice my wife's sister.

One suggestion was that she go and take her daughter back to her own home immediately. Well, apparently she has tried that on 2 occasions. and on each occasion the husband has travelled to her home and forcibly taken the daughter back to his inlaws. I don't think he has great affection for his daughter. Rather, he realises that she is his 'weapon' against his wife.

Trying to reason with this guy seems not possible. When my wife's sister tried to speak reasonably with him yesterday he just shouted at her. The guy has little money and spends what he has on gambling. A loser basically.

One reason why this woman wants to divorce him is because she is unable to acquire any assets etc in her name. Eg - if she buys a car in her name then apparently her 'husband' could lay claim to it. And likewise, if he gets involved in any dodgy dealings and borrows money etc, then the lenders might well come looking for her to repay it.

All in all, she wants shot of the guy so she can get on with her life.

Chaamman, your offer is welcome, so please do PM me with the contact details of this solicitor. But I hope he is not too costly! This problem is not my problem for which I'm prepared to pay the husband as a way out. It is a problem with my wife's sister, and I can only advise her.

Mouse - do you know more about your posting? Clearly, if this is the case then a quick divorce could be had quite easily.

Simon

[mouse]

Mouse - do you know more about your posting? Clearly, if this is the case then a quick divorce could be had quite easily.

Nothing more. I suggest that you have her go to the Amphur's office where they register brith, death, marriage and divorce and speak to the people there. Here in Kamphaeng Phet they have a very nice older gentleman that always goes out of his way to get us this and that, in order for us to qualify the needs of some delirious beauracrat. Good luck and keep us posted.

Information is a valuable commodity in this coutnry.

[Nam Kao]

Thai man efie buffalo chai mai dee

[Yohan]

Our friend in Thailand had about the same problems...husband crazy, took their daughter, refusing divorce..... Hmmm baht 100.000,- will change his mind....this is, what he said....

Some Thai men, when it comes to divorce, feel that they have some right to do so - somehow a repayment of the dowry....anyway, he really paid a dowry 4 years ago..

There are 2 solutions.....one is the legal way.... costs also money, takes a good time, maybe 30 months or so.... who knows.....

and the other one is to pay.... as usual in Thailand there are always 2 choices...

Going there, but not alone, together with an legal advisor, meeting the man, offer as follows: child back to mother now, divorce paper signed now, offer baht 30.000,-in cash - showing him the cash money....your choice, ex-husband: now or never...and of course baht 100.000,- no way at all...

Some talk, finally paid baht 40.000,- ....divorce finished in 30 minutes...

Best to look for some legal advisor to go with you, my general impression, to pay money is not a fair solution, but it is a quick solution.....

Johann

[Thetyim]

My sister in law is going through this and it was my understanding that she did not live under one roof with her spouse for one year and did not accept any financial assistance from him she could go to the Amphur and request to be divorced.

This is correct except you must go through the courts and not through the Amphur

to get a divorce where the husband is not in agreement.

[TizMe]

My GF had to pay 20,000 Baht to her ex before he would sign the papers.

They had been seperated for over 5 years. He had no contact with his children. He was already shacked up with a new wife.

She paid him this amount quickly, because she said that if he found out that she was now dating a "farang" that the price would escalate.

[lopburi3]

She paid him this amount quickly, because she said that if he found out that she was now dating a "farang" that the price would escalate

This is probably a key element in the posters case. The husband has noted a foreigner involved and believes he can get something. As much as it hurts I suspect the cheapest and fastest course would be to bargain the price down and pay him off. Sister in law is right that this is a common property situation as long as she is married so she really should get free of him asap.

Legal process would take time and cause hard feelings to increase. At some point that could become very counter productive. The Thai way of negotiations/face saving is best I believe.

[KevinN]

Depending on where in Thailand he lives,,Might just be cheaper and quicker to hire a shooter.,or slip some linnit in his sausages in the morning.

That really sounds like the correct way to go with such an assho1e.

[taxexile]

Depending on where in Thailand he lives,,Might just be cheaper and quicker to hire a shooter.,or slip some linnit in his sausages in the morning.

a practical man is our kev.

[natee1]

Please enlighten me what is 'linnit'?

[KevinN]

linnit is a pesticide that is sold in farm and garden centers that is posed to be really poison. and was suggested by someone on here to feed to soi dogs inside thai sausages to stop them from barking all night.

[Pepe']

Isn't murder illegal in Thailand?

[simon43]

Well, I'm happy to report that there has been a reasonable happy outcome of all this. Last week the younger brother of my wife's sister went down to see this guy. Rather than getting into a shouting match with him, they went down the pub and chatted together like friends. After a few drinks, the brother was able to persuade him that a quickie divorce without any payments was the best all-round solution.

The guy agreed to this and the sister drove straight down and managed to get the divorce there and then. The only fly in the ointment was that this guy insisted on having custody of the young daughter. But she is being looked after quite well by his family, so this was not a sticking point.

Thanks to everyone who gave useful advice!! I'll try to get a refund on the linnet

[KevinN]

I looked at the divorce rules and it said something about 3 yrs separation and something about 1 year separation and I didn't really understand anything.

My wife says that unless both agree that it must be done by lawyers and a judge,and I guess very expensive..

There are 2 women here that we know that want a divorce from their husbands because of girl friends of husbands,they leave home for days at a time and they say no divorce and one is a school teacher and the other has a retail business and they both make the money and owned the property before marriage,but the husbands claim the business's and the real property. one is a used car salesman and the other is a cop, so looks like the women are screwed,,maybe you can sell the Linnet to them?

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Isn't murder illegal in Thailand?

Getting caught seems to be the main problem Pepe

[KevinN]

Maybe you could say they were big time drug dealers?,,It seems to be legal to kill them.