Chris Daley

His kids must be proud of him.

We already invented candy in England. Did Thailand not get the memo?

Use western union

You ran 8 km? Why would anyone do that? It's too much to be daily exercise and a one-off marathon is dangerous. Little but often is better than 8k once a year.

Yeah I sometimes think Aseannow is a disgusting trove of car accident threads but Thairaith takes some beating. They have some gruesome footage ready for the morning viewers.

Talk abbot taking the piss.

Fishing is for the lowest of the low in Thailand. She would be embarrassed to be with you.

Go to the immigration office. The online stuff never works in Thailand. If you see .th just leave it.

If they sell you mayo that is condensed milk and put your hot coffee cup in a plastic bag, it's time to start stabbing.

It could be the house owner / landlady that isn't paying. I paid my fees on time every month and then one day they said they were missing some. I sent a message to the landlady and she said she will sort it out. They would even come to the front of our house and shout her name. My gf said she doesn't live here. We also had some debt collectors come around looking for her. Please contact the home owner not the person renting it. There is a chance the Thai people are keeping the money.

Good luck. You're going to need it.

So many zip-lock plastic bags being collected as evidence these days.

By the time it takes me to find protection and do that it would be game over or I would forget and come back upstairs with the tv remote. I let the woman do the protection.

See what happens if you don't wear a mask.

The company that my gf works for just fired 3 workers. And they only have like 7 to start with. They are trying to give them an opportunity to resign first because the boss doesn't want to pay the leaving salary to them. The boss spends all the money on big houses, nice cars, golf clubs and drinking. So the slightest change and he is finished.

The tree that they hit had been the cause of accidents before. Because it is a ghost tree.

One time I was at Laos airport and about 100 sacks of rice went on before me.

I blame video games.

I will be working. Xmas day is test day in Thai schools. So I will be an exam invigilator. The Thai testing system is the most out of date and confusing thing. Everything is in Thai writing but we expected to do it. Draw the seating plan on the whiteboard, arrange the desks in that order, hand the papers out in that order except there are two year groups in each room so now the papers are different because one groups is doing math and the other is doing science so now we collect the papers except math finished after 1 hour and science is 40 minutes so now we collect the papers and put them into your fingers in a certain order (the thai teacher insisted that I stack 20 papers between my fingers and another 20 between the others so they are 'in order') but we check them again anyway so collect the papers except 3 students are not finished so now there is no order and also walk up the rows in order and skip every other row because there are two subjects also ask the students to tear apart certain pages now sort the papers into different bags except the torn pages go on top and now use a huge metal spike to stab 15 test papers (i actually saw one thai teacher bleeding blood over the papers because she had cut herself) put the papers into the bags and take them to the office. do it again for the next 5 days.

Tourists can not have a Thai ATM card.

Steve-O - ''Going clean is my hardest stunt yet.''

So many jokes, so little time....

I bent down slightly to play with my cat and felt a sharp stabbing pain across my head. I have had this for a while now and it comes and goes randomly. I believe they are called Icepick Headaches. How about you? Do you think nothing matters and we live in an uncaring universe? Or do you think there is a purpose to life? Can you measure 'good' or is it just an abstract idea?

It means you are just not very good at English. The lazy students are like you. They speak basic pub English and it is full of mistakes. The advanced students can joke about current events and speak at full speed in a clear voice. Either all English speakers are wrong, or you suck at English. Also try this on with Chinese. Go to the teacher and tell her she can not speak Chinese.

After finishing my sweet shredded pork sweet bread sweet mayo 3-tier sandwich. I felt a bit thirsty but then I remembered Thailand doesn't have clean drinking water so I started musing on the delicious drinking water in England and the free healthcare. It made me remember that ''To be born British is to win first prize in the lottery of life.'' I will now go an read up on the latest school shootings in America.