How Does Your Partner Rate?

[jamman]

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

Then I rated the most important of my past girlfriends. The system works, the numbers closely matched how connected I was with these women and the overall satisfaction.

Quality Possible points

Emotionally stable. 5

Faithful 5

Empathetic 5

Quality, quantity, power of orgasms 7

Physically attractive 6

Smart 5

Good lover 4

Gracious 3

Giving 2

Attentive 5

Forgiving 4

Fun 6

Demerits

Bossy -4

Naggy -4

Gets fat -3

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

Does your current partner rate a higher score than your highest scoring previous one? How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

[The Dan Sai Kid]

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

Then I rated the most important of my past girlfriends. The system works, the numbers closely matched how connected I was with these women and the overall satisfaction.

Quality Possible points

Emotionally stable. 5

Faithful 5

Empathetic 5

Quality, quantity, power of orgasms 7

Physically attractive 6

Smart 5

Good lover 4

Gracious 3

Giving 2

Attentive 5

Forgiving 4

Fun 6

Demerits

Bossy -4

Naggy -4

Gets fat -3

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

Does your current partner rate a higher score than your highest scoring previous one? How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

Are you single?

If so, I think I know why!

[jumnien]

Boy, I'd hate to see how my wife would rate me!

Spends too much time reading TV posts -5

[jamman]

Are you single?

If so, I think I know why!

I came up with this excersise as I was puzzled by my last relationship, and wanted to be sure to look for a more suitable mate next time.

Putting numbers on the characteristics important to me helped me to see a whole picture, without diminishing the value of any of the parts. I value sexuality, as reflected in how many sexual characteristics are included, and their scores. And the non-sexual characteristics make up the greater bulk. I'm sure others will have very different value systems. I'd be curious as to how different.

[In the Rai!]

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

[Robski]

Are these ratings out of ten? if so it reads like this;

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

Then I rated the most important of my past girlfriends. The system works, the numbers closely matched how connected I was with these women and the overall satisfaction.

Quality Possible points

Emotionally stable. 5 She had a bipolar disorder.

Faithful 5 screwed half my mates.

Empathetic 5 could hardly work out what I was on about.

Quality, quantity, power of orgasms 7 Alll she ever wanted was a shag

Physically attractive 6 weren't no oil painting.

Smart 5 didn't understand the off-side rule.

Good lover 4 wouldn't go down.

Gracious 3 A total nightmare in public.

Giving 2 forgot my birthday, but did leave me with a little present.

Attentive 5 Used to show up on payday.

Forgiving 4 She just wouldn't let it lay.

Fun 6 She liked a drink.

As for the rest what can I say? She certainly made an impression on you.

Demerits

Bossy -4

Naggy -4

Gets fat -3

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

Does your current partner rate a higher score than your highest scoring previous one? How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

I'd scrap it. Cheer up mate things couldn't get any worse!

Edited January 15, 2007 by Robski

[The Dan Sai Kid]

Actually, you left out breast size and can she cook...

[jamman]

Are these ratings out of ten? if so it reads like this;

The idea is that these number are the maximum score, per category. For instance I can rate any former lover from 0 to 5 for emotional stability. Each category can get a different maximum number, depending on how heavily that category affects my attraction and comfort with the person.

Past lovers scored a total of from 1 to 48, with most somewhere around 22.

Edited January 15, 2007 by jamman

[jbowman1993]

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

Then I rated the most important of my past girlfriends. The system works, the numbers closely matched how connected I was with these women and the overall satisfaction.

Quality Possible points

Emotionally stable. 5

Faithful 5

Empathetic 5

Quality, quantity, power of orgasms 7

Physically attractive 6

Smart 5

Good lover 4

Gracious 3

Giving 2

Attentive 5

Forgiving 4

Fun 6

Demerits

Bossy -4

Naggy -4

Gets fat -3

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

Does your current partner rate a higher score than your highest scoring previous one? How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

Wow, you are an idiot...

[jamman]

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

Wow, you are an idiot...

I can certainly see why you are attracted to a website discussion board. You are quite articulate, and your empathy and cutting insight shine, with a unique character.

Aside from noticing that I'm an idiot, (I'll give you that) was there something about my post you have any comment about? Were my values similar to yours? Do you appreciate thinking about what matters in a mate?

[jamman]

Actually, you left out breast size and can she cook...

Breast size - ya - but it's included under physcially attractive.

I did forget honesty. I've been in Asia for 5 years, and some standards have laxed.

I'm of a new mindset now. I have in mind to look for love in higher class places. The problem with that is that educated dames sometimes lose track of their libidinous roots. I appreciate conversation and passion - the both. I tried low class girls, but that didn't work out for me. I wonder about things like that, but find the only way to find out, is not to think, but to do. I did, and I'm done.

[jamman]

Are you single?

If so, I think I know why!

Why?

Edited January 17, 2007 by jamman

[Alf Witt]

Wow! He's really taking this seriously!

Is this the same guy who was searching for "classy birds" a few days ago?

My suggestion - there are some Japanese websites called "Anime" or "Hentai". Check them out. Sounds like you are into virtual reality.

[jbowman1993]

Are you single?

If so, I think I know why!

Why?

Why? Because you are an idiot...

[helicoptor]

Are these ratings out of ten? if so it reads like this;

In trying to understand who I should pursue, I wrote down the attributes most important to me, and gave them points.

Then I rated the most important of my past girlfriends. The system works, the numbers closely matched how connected I was with these women and the overall satisfaction.

Quality Possible points

Emotionally stable. 5 She had a bipolar disorder.

Faithful 5 screwed half my mates.

Empathetic 5 could hardly work out what I was on about.

Quality, quantity, power of orgasms 7 Alll she ever wanted was a shag

Physically attractive 6 weren't no oil painting.

Smart 5 didn't understand the off-side rule.

Good lover 4 wouldn't go down.

Gracious 3 A total nightmare in public.

Giving 2 forgot my birthday, but did leave me with a little present.

Attentive 5 Used to show up on payday.

Forgiving 4 She just wouldn't let it lay.

Fun 6 She liked a drink.

As for the rest what can I say? She certainly made an impression on you.

Demerits

Bossy -4

Naggy -4

Gets fat -3

Psychopath cruelty -5

Psycho jealousy -5

Does your current partner rate a higher score than your highest scoring previous one? How would you change the rating system to be closer to your personal values?

I'd scrap it. Cheer up mate things couldn't get any worse!

QUALITY post you have cheered me up for the rest of the day Robski

[tutsiwarrior]

this thread sorta brings to mind the 'football test' scene outta the movie Diner by Barry Levinson wherein a girl was supposta answer correctly to obscure questions about american football before her boyfriend would consider marriage...

jamman, don't mean to offend, but there is a similarity...

[OlRedEyes]

You seem to be searching for a new direction. If you are drifting, just relax. There's nowhere to go in this life anyways. Just enjoy the experiences. The best experiences happen without mapping.

If you're tired of the 'low-class' partners, from the little I've gathered about you from your previous postings, the hiso's will definitely piss you off. Middle class seems the best bet. But generally, as with anything middle-of-the-road, they can get boring....

[jamman]

this thread sorta brings to mind the 'football test' scene outta the movie Diner by Barry Levinson wherein a girl was supposta answer correctly to obscure questions about american football before her boyfriend would consider marriage...

jamman, don't mean to offend, but there is a similarity...

I'm not seeing the similarity. All of us, ALL of us, try to get a mate we are attracted to. I simply am trying to put into words as accurately as possible what I'm attracted to.

I'm baffled at the response to this. I'd have thought it was an obvious and natural thing to do - something that we all do - if not so precicely. I'd have thought added clarity for such an important choice would be seen as helpful.

[jamman]

You seem to be searching for a new direction. If you are drifting, just relax. There's nowhere to go in this life anyways. Just enjoy the experiences. The best experiences happen without mapping.

If you're tired of the 'low-class' partners, from the little I've gathered about you from your previous postings, the hiso's will definitely piss you off. Middle class seems the best bet. But generally, as with anything middle-of-the-road, they can get boring....

Ya, in terms of class, I have my own definition of it, based on personal qualities, and not social rank. To me a person is classy to the degree that they are empathetic and curious. Strangely enough, there are families, tribes, whole communities with a high percentage of unempathetic and uninspired people. To get out of the getto physically is easier than mentally, for people trained in greed and boredom.

I suspect you are right that boring can go hand in hand with middle class. I'm attracted to high living risk takers. People who aim to blend in bore me silly.

I do enjoy things that "just happen". But I'm not going to be a blind idiot again - learning from mistakes makes the new things that "just happen" happen better. I'll be choosy - it's a good idea. I've seen the vast difference of quality of life my father had with his first versus second wife. Our mate makes an incalculably huge difference to the quality of life.

[Robski]

I'm baffled at the response to this. I'd have thought it was an obvious and natural thing to do - something that we all do - if not so precicely. I'd have thought added clarity for such an important choice would be seen as helpful.

We may do it, but in our own heads. Writing a list mm... maybe but it's a sign your getting neurotic about it.

Publishing that list in a public forum, NAH!

Jamman, you live you learn, that's the way it goes.

There's no such thing as perfection and when you meet the girl of your dreams you'll find she has some bad habit or baggage that annoys the sheeite out of you.

It's normal to be cynical/confused about the other half, just don't wear your heart on your sleeve and try looking past the stereotypes. Now stop whinging and be a man about it!

Edited January 18, 2007 by Robski

[OlRedEyes]

I find you an exceptional poster. Very interesting. I've often wondered what my life would have been like today had I continued being as intense as I was during the first 40 years. Getting over my existential crisis sorted that out to a great degree.

Once you really realise that nothing matters, why bother? Surely the only two reasons would be for protecting those you care for from suffering, and the pleasure of life and understanding. But maybe you believe differently. Somehow I don't take you for a fairy-on-the-plant type person.

Ever hear the term burnout.

Keep on posting. I love your direct even style. And your mind. And the <deleted> you stir

/edit

I have even been welcomed as a member here by <deleted> now

Edited January 18, 2007 by OlRedEyes

[jamman]

I'm baffled at the response to this. I'd have thought it was an obvious and natural thing to do - something that we all do - if not so precicely. I'd have thought added clarity for such an important choice would be seen as helpful.

We may do it, but in our own heads. Writing a list mm... maybe but it's a sign your getting neurotic about it.

Publishing that list in a public forum, NAH!

Jamman, you live you learn, that's the way it goes.

There's no such thing as perfection and when you meet the girl of your dreams you'll find she has some bad habit or baggage that annoys the sheeite out of you.

It's normal to be cynical/confused about the other half, just don't wear your heart on your sleeve and try looking past the stereotypes. Now stop whinging and be a man about it!

What are you going on about. I'm not winging, and I'm over.

If you think a public forum is not a place for discussing such issues, that is your neurosis, not mine.

As for perfection, I'm not clear as to why you mention it. I'm talking about priorities, and understanding what I want. That does not equate to demanding perfection.

Edited January 18, 2007 by jamman

[jamman]

I find you an exceptional poster. Very interesting. I've often wondered what my life would have been like today had I continued being as intense as I was during the first 40 years. Getting over my existential crisis sorted that out to a great degree.

Once you really realise that nothing matters, why bother? Surely the only two reasons would be for protecting those you care for from suffering, and the pleasure of life and understanding. But maybe you believe differently. Somehow I don't take you for a fairy-on-the-plant type person.

Ever hear the term burnout.

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

I'm not concerned about burn out. As to things mattering, having meaning or not, I have a burning, undying curiosity. There doesn't have to be a reason to be curious. Life force courses in me, reason or no. As for intensity, I have no interest in lessening it - in fact I do chi-kung meditations that raise intensity to dangerous and perhaps insane levels. What else is a body to do? Turning down the volume is not my aim - I don't want that kind of cessation of suffering.

I can no longer say with my previous certaintly that nihilism is a confusion, but from a strict hedonistic point of view, it seems nihilism doesn't take into account that meaningless wisdom is better than meaningless ignorance. Give me more.

Edited January 18, 2007 by jamman

[meom]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

[jamman]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

[meom]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

So when you rated your first woman wasn't masturbation sort of the bench mark?

[jamman]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

So when you rated your first woman wasn't masturbation sort of the bench mark?

I'm really not getting you. I have no idea what, or why, you are trying to communicate. It's like you are speaking a foreign language. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.

[meom]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

So when you rated your first woman wasn't masturbation sort of the bench mark?

I'm really not getting you. I have no idea what, or why, you are trying to communicate. It's like you are speaking a foreign language. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.

Sorry mate i thought the topic of the thread was to rate your previous lovers.

[jamman]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

So when you rated your first woman wasn't masturbation sort of the bench mark?

I'm really not getting you. I have no idea what, or why, you are trying to communicate. It's like you are speaking a foreign language. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.

Sorry mate i thought the topic of the thread was to rate your previous lovers.

A wild guess at what you are trying to say: are you suggesting to think of someone while masturbating, to get a clearer emotional feel for them?

Edited January 18, 2007 by jamman

[meom]

Ya, I've had some existential criseses also. I like that kind of puzzle. I'm having one now. I have no idea what matters.

Have you tried masturbation? It might alter your perspective

I'm not following your meaning at all. Of course I masturbate - everyone does.

So when you rated your first woman wasn't masturbation sort of the bench mark?

I'm really not getting you. I have no idea what, or why, you are trying to communicate. It's like you are speaking a foreign language. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.

Sorry mate i thought the topic of the thread was to rate your previous lovers.

A wild guess at what you are trying to say: are you suggesting to think of someone while masturbating, to get a clearer emotional feel for them?

I'm simply asking what points in your rating system would you give to your hands and do they rank higher or lower than some of your girl friends?