When...you look around at 4 years of gathered 'chattle' (pots, pans, DVD player, TV, kettle, electric fan, sugar jars etc.) and...

NONE OF IT WORKS PROPERLY....

AND...

YOU KNOW YOU WILL NOT GET YOUR MONEY BACK ON ANY OF IT....

AND...

You just smile to yourself and thank Buddha you are living here!

when a thai girl has got 4 fingers up her nose and you just shrug and say " mai bepen rai "

You know you've been in Thailand too long when:

- you read "You know you've been in Thailand too long when..." for the zillionth time

You know you've been in Thailand too long when:

- you read "You know you've been in Thailand too long when..." for the zillionth time

Good one.

... When you go to the other half's village in the middle of nowhere and enjoy yourself.

......When you KNOW you've been here too long and you read the "You Know You've been In Thailand Too Long" forum for the zillionth time but you can still find some things to add.......time to cash in and get a book deal

.. when you order noodles on a street stand and nip into the 7/11 for a cup of coffee to go with it, don't get annoyed at the slow service, just leave it on the counter for them to check out in their own good time and then bring outside to your table.

.. when you find Bangkoks streets to quiet (!!) you buy some guava just to hear the Thais say "he he he, farang gin farang!"

.. when you drive past an ATM because there is one Thai person using it.

Think this is the best thread I've ever seen on here.

Not only does it not bother you a lady is cleaning the urinal next to the one you are using, but that you also start to have a casual chat with her.

You think blondes look exotic.

You think a face smothered hand cream and white powder is attractive.

You stop thinking that a girl riding pillion on a motorbike, side-saddle, wearing a mini-skirt, with one toe pointing to the ground, while putting on make-up, is anything out of the ordinary.

Farang tourists come up to you and ask you directions.

You think L & M cigarettes taste better than B & H.

You think nothing of getting up on stage at a karaeoke bar and singing - and you know the words off by heart. (I got THREE floral garlands for MY effort!)

Peter

Yep hilarious thread. Living in Oz with Thai wife and her mum these things still happen

when you think the 300 metres to the local shop is faaaar too far to walk.

You know you've been in Thailand too long when:

You have overstayed your visa.

You know you've been in Thailand too long when:

You have overstayed your visa.

Obviously!

I don't unnerstand...I've seen all ob de above an' I don't think that I've been in Thailand too long (2 years cumulative out ob de past sebben...)

gee willakers...

.......When you become a buddhist monk to try to evade the visa people

You know you've been in Thailand too long when:

• You can go for weeks without toilet paper
  
• The footprints on the toilet seat are your own
  
• It's perfectly acceptable to drive on the wrong side of the street
  
• You decline to weara motorbyke helmet because it will mess up your hair
  
• You have a pinky fingernail an inch long
  
• It is no longer surprising that the only decision made at meeting time is the venue of the next meeeting
  
• You no longer wonder how a civil servant earning 400US$ a month can afford to drive a Mercedes
  
• It's exciting to see if you can get into the elevator before anyone else can get out
  
• "Sexpats", "Pirates", "Yellow Fever" and "Rice Queens" are part of your vocabulary
  
• It's just part of the adventure when the waiter correctly repeats your order and the cook makes you something completely different
  
• When shopping at the supermarket, a farang stares you downwhen he catches you looking into his basket while you wonder to yourself what farangs eat
  
• You are not surprised when three men show up to chane a lightbulb.
  
• You are careful to cover your mouth when picking your teeth, but openly pick your nose at the dinner table.
  

You shout "Hey You" when you see another farang on the other side of the street!!

When you have friends visiting from home, you act astonished and congratulate them when they put some chilli on their food, and say things like, "Ooooh!! Farang gin pet dai!!!! Geng mak!"

When you talk to your parents/home based friends on the phone you express agreement with "err err nan lae" and have to fight the urge to end the call with "kap, kap, wad dee kap"

when you get a pizza and immediately proceed to add more tomato sauce on top of the cheese.

when a comedian being hit on the head with a metal tray is actually pretty funny.

when you get in the taxi and the dude turns the meter on without you asking.

when your in a klong taxi and your the dude holding the rope to pull up the splash sheet.

You don't flinch at guys in the toilet staring at your knob!!

You correct the bar girls begging emails for them.

The street vendors on Sukhumvit Road buy you beer.

...when you get to the mo'cyc taxi stand at 11am, see all the drivers sitting drinking lao khao & still consider getting them to take you to your destination

when a comedian being hit on the head with a metal tray is actually pretty funny.

That is the height of comedic sophistication and hilarity. A bit like a fat ugly katoey slipping on a banana skin whilst being chased by some hiso tart with a gun.

When you're on the phone to your 70-year old auntie and you're raving about the freebie you scored last night out of the Nana Disco.

When the Thai immigration officer asks YOU for permission to stay.

(Silly, I know)

When you start noticing topics looping back again on TV

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=3662

- when you get annoyed of constant reminders from other thaivisa members, telling you that a particular subject has been discussed before.

when you start saying 'kani na' when you're finished on the telephone.

When the touts ignore you.

When the touts ignore you

and the hookers