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The silence of the lamb(s).

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As I keep close contact with my Farang friends in Thailand, there seems to be a re-occuring theme and appearantly more common than I ever thought.


Here it is:  Oftentimes, when Thai wife gets mad at Farang hubby, instead of discussing a problem with hubby, some Thai wifes tend to go silent for days at a time. (Avoiding confrontation, I suppose). The affected Farangs usually don't take this well.


There was a time when I too was confronted with lenghty periods of silence. The day came, when I decided to counteract the "silence-terror" by checking into the nearest hotel (in the sticks), leaving message that I would not return home unless she would regain speach quickly. Otherwise, she would have to visit me in the future at "Lulu's Bar and Grill and Dancers" in Pattaya. Extremely effective. Had to apply this strategy only 2 times. Miraculously, she regained speach in less than 24 hours on both occasions. After that, no more "silence" episodes.


Just curious, how other TVF members handle (handled) this or similar situations.
Cheers.
PS: Clearly only addressing Farangs that have found themeselves in such a situation. Posts like "My Thai Wife of 69 years has never done anything like that to me" are unnecessary, as they would be "off topic" right from the beginning.

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  • cornishcarlos
    cornishcarlos

    I enjoy the peace and quiet.... I've got very good at making her sulk :)

  • chrissables
    chrissables

    Try this...........   "Are you ok darling?" No answer   "Anything i can do for you?" No answer   "I'm moving to Soi 6 for a few days, ok" Answer most likel

  • I am shocked when she invades the ambient silence by speaking.  Remember....  silence is golden, enjoy it when ya got it.

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Years ago I gave mine 500 baht and told her to go home to her village for a while.

The break perhaps did us both good, but she soon began to realize in that environment where her bread was buttered. Recent times we have both got closer and it is rare.... but I just leave her to it if she has a bottom-lip event.

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I enjoy the peace and quiet.... I've got very good at making her sulk :)

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Try this...........

 

"Are you ok darling?"

No answer

 

"Anything i can do for you?"

No answer

 

"I'm moving to Soi 6 for a few days, ok"

Answer most likely!

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I am shocked when she invades the ambient silence by speaking.  Remember....  silence is golden, enjoy it when ya got it.

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I never have that problem......She has the problem... ( with my silences).

Yep, get that too but these days it only lasts for a couple of hours. Even so, it's so immature - and she's nearly 40!

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I divorced the childish drudge and found another who could act more sensibly.

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Say nothing, and start packing a suitcase....

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16 minutes ago, cms22 said:

Yep, get that too but these days it only lasts for a couple of hours. Even so, it's so immature - and she's nearly 40!

In Thai years that's about 13!

Be Happy - slience is golden .....

 

remember the old saying...

 

"when a thai woman is talking to you she is lying"....

 

"when a thai woman is not talking and silent she is thinking of the next lie to tell you" ........

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I give her some time to stew... it usually goes away after 5 minutes, but it is mostly a rarity for us - my wife is mostly happy, but then I can have the opposite problem, when happy, she talks too much.

 

I once advised a friend new to Thai, to shut up if his wife gets angry and give her 5 minutes. When she got angry, he told her "24" said I should shut up for 5 minutes - she answered, "better make it ten!" You have to give extra points for funny.  

1 hour ago, jacko45k said:

Years ago I gave mine 500 baht and told her to go home to her village for a while.

The break perhaps did us both good, but she soon began to realize in that environment where her bread was buttered. Recent times we have both got closer and it is rare.... but I just leave her to it if she has a bottom-lip event.

Hide your money and go out and don't come back for 3 days. Then everything will be resolved within minutes, one way or another.

 

My wife (40, well educated teacher) got moody with me for a few days as I asked her to put the baby to bed at 11.30 pm as I wanted to see something on the TV before bed !

 

But she usually comes round a day or so later.

 

Sometimes I wonder if they are like this rather than confront the issues as they still worry about their ex clocking them one before and fear the same.

 

 

If my wife does this she is waiting for an apology or for me to try and sweet talk her and show her that I care. Being stubborn I refuse to do this if I did nothing wrong in the first place. So, I wait for her to get over her childish silence and look forward to the make up sex ;)

I simply ignore her and carry on as usual, it generally doesn't last long then.

I was married to one of those many years ago. If I knew then what I now know, the first time she tried it on I would have told her to &&&& off.

2 hours ago, cornishcarlos said:

I enjoy the peace and quiet.... I've got very good at making her sulk :)

This. 

 

A bit of PlayStation or Netflix in peace is great. 

2 hours ago, weegee said:

Say nothing, and start packing a suitcase....

I can see the reaction in my head  "Where you go??" she will say with kitchen knife in her hand  - 

 

My wife doesn't do the silent treatment.  To her credit, that is one area where she has become Westernized.  Arguments are normally short blowups, mutual silence for a short period of time, and either we both drop it, or we talk it out. 

Yes my Thai wife is the same well educated in the Thai manner ie never wrong (ex Teacher) but gets angry quickly, as i do, then argue over something ridiculous, which i forget quickly, she then goes into a sulk that can last for days depending of the strength of our argument, other than that, she's one in a million! 

After a good spat ... three days of silence is my golden rule .... together, we go on about our business without speaking .... it works wonders .... many times, the original spat is never even discussed again.  Usually, with sincere relationships, this works wonders because the cause is some stupid misunderstanding that actually sorts itself in the silence. Insincere relationships will never sort themselves no matter the problem solving approach . . .just sayn 

You van either accept to live with her mindset until you die or chanhe to another one. There are girls that are intelligent and know how to conversate. But yes its a common problem in thailand and thaigirls

pack her bags and put them at the front door....worked for me...

When I was back home my ex never spoke to me for three months, I told my mate, and he said " hang on to her, not many of them about " Their like hens teeth

I have a good laff and then go for a beer or two or theww or four. I just ignore her until she speaks to me

My Falang friends and I don't have that experience , in fact the opposite , we are screamed at .  Any attempt to defend ourselves verbally is deemed an argument ; so we have learnt to give wives the silent treatment .  My wife only takes half an hour to an hours to come and apologize , say she's sorry to talk too fast and too loud .  

2 hours ago, RichardColeman said:

My wife (40, well educated teacher)

 

do you think of her in those terms or are the parentheses there to help us understand your wife is different?

Mine used to pull that crap.  She went 3 days once.  I ignore it if I am right, I apologize if I am wrong.  She has learned that if don't apologize I never will and she cools off.  The time frame has gone down from 3 days to 1 shower length. 

 

 

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