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NE live in village monthly


DJ54

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51 minutes ago, BEVUP said:

Wasn't expecting family to come along !

 

That's where it all went wrong - where were they before, in some shack working on a farm

Some people have had the parents come along (when older then these 2 )

Certainly not Free Loading sisters

 

Why on earth are you paying those freeloaders?  What does your wife do all day (watch them )

You pay for everything & give them a place to stay (isn't that enough ), if they want extra let them earn it 

These pair are taking the piss - do you think a thai family would pay their live in relatives to do chores

 

Your about to retire ! You had better get a grip on things

BIL sends 3000 a mth for 2 kids - That wouldn't cut it, who is paying the rest or is that just a minders fee

 

5000 is ample my wife gives elderly mother (unable to work ) 2000 p/mth

 

10,000 ? You have been had from the start.

Some people have actually got to fully support themselves in rented accommodation on that

 

Am I correct to say that are you Aussie 

That would be just over $400 AUD a mth alone - You must have a good super (most Aussies don't )

 

 

 

 

Perhaps he can afford to and he wants to do it.

 

After all it is his life, his family and it won't cost you even 25 satang.

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10 minutes ago, billd766 said:

Perhaps he can afford to and he wants to do it.

 

After all it is his life, his family and it won't cost you even 25 satang.

Yes up to him 

But why throw the quote in " I wasn't expecting the family to come along "

Then starts building / paying / supplying / ect 

& is now worried they want more (which wont cost me a Satang )

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3 hours ago, DJ54 said:

This is a learning experience for me in the works.

Should have done yer homework at home. Too late now. How's things going to be if you find out you've been paying too much and then try and cut it. You'll be public enemy number one. Posts #37 & 38 hit the nail.

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On 5/16/2018 at 7:03 AM, DJ54 said:

 

Thanks to all for input. 

 

Your monthly (everyone included) spend should be as much as they might expect from a good son/daughter/spouse who was living living away from home and sending home as much money as they could.

 

(A good son/daughter/spouse who was of their socio-economic group).

 

If you want to go a bit further (and justify a foreigner being in their family rather than a Thai) you could bung them a couple of thou on top.

 

If you don't put in a bit extra what's the point of having you around, instead of having a Thai (albeit rarely seen) who speaks the lingo, likes the food and isn't always complaining about how different is to the "old country"?

 

That is the way "relationships" (all relationships) work in Thailand.

 

All very well understood among the Thais themselves.

 

Or did you think it was about "love"?

 

 

Edited by Enoon
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8 hours ago, Rally123 said:

It doesn't sound like it. And why come on a public forum seeking advice?

 

What don't you understand about the fact that it IS his life and not yours?

 

It is not as if he is begging TVF for a #gofundme.

 

8 hours ago, Rally123 said:

'WHY?'

 

Wrong question. Why not stay?

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10 hours ago, DJ54 said:

Appreciate it Rally and just giving you a bit of jaw jacking.

 

All that said I’m a bit of a softy I will admit 100% that’s absolutely correct and part of my mindset that all people aren’t bad. Grew up in East LA hood met bad and and mostly good people. Southern born Papa Alabama Mama Georgia good old folks. 

 

I’ve been fortunate in life making decent money taking my knowledge and starting a Rep company (Aerospace) Asia for last 15 years. Lucky on houses I’ve boughtand sold 1 in California that doubled before market dropped, 2 in China from Cal. Profits which doubled. The tired of 

China moved to Thailand land for the weather low costs etc. 

 

Thinkng surely what goes in China won’t be the same elsewhere and as you say poor are the same most places. I believed the story the gal told 

me poor family etc. I’ve questioned my self several time on what are you thinking open your eyes idiot. 

 

The reason I asked input was to make sure I wasn’t getting shellacked again. Which it was an attempt to do so. Used some information given from forum members and told the wife I asked what Is the norm and accordingly no increase. 

 

Although a little late ate and a decent sum lost before I woke up. I’ve pulled in the reins and was told I’m going to leave. Ok good luck I’m not

giving to invalid requests the door is that way. 

 

Possible lucky that the land bought 2 years ago was a block of land that

One older individual owns will transfer ownership to many second quarter. With the relationship I’ve built with owner be able to delay or ?

if needed. 

 

Learned a a lot in a short period of two years and a big part of that from the folks on the forum. A great deal eyeopeners. Love the country and ideal place to live. Just need to make good decisions thinking of myself. Anything that falls in place good if not I’m still in good shape. 

 

Thanks have ave a great weekend. 

 

I admire your honesty even though you will get the usual cynical crap from some. 

You are right to pull in the reigns a little. You have contributed a lot to the family already and they are all benefitting a great deal by you being around. 

As a previous poster said the alarm bells would ring for me when they wanted to up the ante to 10,000/month. There is no justification for this only greed. 

Your intentions were good by trying to start a business. I can see quite a few parallels in your relationship and mine tbh. I have done similar with my partner and up to now she's running her little shop well. Her parents dont ask for money but I do buy food and treat give them a couple of thousand now and again but definitely not a regular income type of thing. 

I try and stay away from regular handouts for the very reason you are experiencing. 

Its all a learning curve. Best of luck. 

 

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1 minute ago, sammieuk1 said:

I will be giving the in-laws my tired leather sofa as soon as I can find a replacement and that will be my total contribution in 8 years.

I don't give anything anymore ( they blew or stuffed the lot )

MIL is 65 + & has had a mild stroke (that's the only 2000 bht from wife / me )

I replaced a Sofa once & only to discover it had a big rip in it due to not controlling BIL kids 

Now no problems as BIL wont show his face due to what he had done to family & SIL now in BK & MIL back in the village wooden hut

 

 

 

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It’s all give and take in the end , as they are unaware of the consequences . You give and they take, and take and take. Never stops. There’s no shame. And as proof, I personally know many who have lost their shirt. A new love affair recently in that area and the lady’s demand was for over 40,000 a month. 

 

I wish i knew how to communicate to them about consequences. But they are great poker players. Push hard. Too hard most times. 

I believe the idea is there are always rich farangs available.

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14 minutes ago, Brickbat said:

It’s all give and take in the end , as they are unaware of the consequences . You give and they take, and take and take. Never stops. There’s no shame. And as proof, I personally know many who have lost their shirt. A new love affair recently in that area and the lady’s demand was for over 40,000 a month. 

 

I wish i knew how to communicate to them about consequences. But they are great poker players. Push hard. Too hard most times. 

I believe the idea is there are always rich farangs available.

If that was what she making in Pattaya or alike, then her price is 40 000,- 

 

Simple as that, why make it so complicated? 

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For reference, my wife gives her mum about 12,000 Baht for 6 months (2,000 Baht per month). All other expenses are paid by us, so that's just pocket money for hairdresser, going to temple, and so on.

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On 15/05/2018 at 11:20 PM, cooked said:

Without knowing all the details I should say that ฿5000.- a month is really enough. What were they living off before you turned up? 

No harm to the OP, but if it was me, I would be saying to myself, this is the only reason I am here, apart from the 5000 Baht per month, anyone who lets themself get into the position that they are financially responsible for in laws are off their head.

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1 hour ago, atyclb said:

look at the bright side, many can return to their home countries and become gainfully employed as experts in administering public assistance.

& the same situation with Thais (in a sense )

Take the OP who tried to help them with a business - Yep failed (as we know why ), then they just went back & lazed around again (I've seen all this to )

Or they end up with a nice house, blow that through greed by mortgaging to get more (face ) & end back up in the shack

 

But then as other posters have said why not get a middle class women 

That also comes with the fact that most of them would be up to their eyeballs in debt (but at least they may have something in the end to show for it )

 

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