Worst Joke Ever 2024

[ballpoint]

Woman just phoned her husband and the conversation went like this :-
Her... "You know that Gladiator movie that I got you for Xmas..???
Him...: "Yeah."
Her...: "Wind it forward One Hour, 16 mins and 28 seconds."
Him..."Right, I've done that"..
Her..: "Okay, you see the Gladiator at the front Fighting the Lion"..???
Him...: "I can see that, yeah."
Her...: "Just behind him, there are two Gladiators having a Sword Fight with each other"..??
Him...: Okay, I see them."
Her...: "Well, behind them two, on the left hand side of the Screen, there's a Gladiator holding a Spear"..???
Him... "Yes...! I can see him"..
Her...: "Those are the Sandals, I want for my Birthday".

[ballpoint]

Studies have shown that men think about sex every 5 minge!

[ballpoint]

What do you call a Filipino contortionist?

A Manila Folder.

[ballpoint]

My wife asked me if I could clear the kitchen table.

I had to get a running start, but I made it!

[tifino]

7 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Studies have shown that men think about sex every 5 minge!

minge of flies has an interestingly relevant cover! ???? 

[jvs]

14 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

Something must be wrong with your feet?

[Davo369]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

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[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Davo369]

[Seth1a2a]

On 1/2/2021 at 7:18 PM, sanuk711 said:

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This ailment has many victims .  Even a guy in New Zealand has it.....He could not make the convention due to 49 personal reasons. Others were also too busy to attend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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and in other news,  New Zealand 'shooter' flashes 'white power' symbol in court.

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Edited January 5, 2021 by Seth1a2a

[fangless]

A nymphomaniac could never find enough men to satisfy her so she decided to buy her own sex aid. She had an old boyfriend who stocked some unique sexual aids and went along to ask him for something extra special.” As it happens, I’ve just had this delivered,” he said. “It’s from Hawaii and it’s got strange powers. All you have to say is “Sex toy my hole” and it will do the business.” 

So she took it home, unwrapped it and said “Sex toy my hole” 
and the thing jumped out of the box and up between her legs.

 

It was the most fantastic feeling she’d ever had but when she wanted it to stop she couldn’t. Her boyfriend hadn’t given her the right words to say and she was now feeling very knackered. 
“There’s only one thing to do,” she thought to herself. “I’d better get to the doctor’s.” 

So she jumped in the car and drove as fast as she could to the surgery but on the way a policeman stopped her for speeding. She explained her predicament, in between having another orgasm, but the policeman looked at her as if she was mad. “If I believed that, I’d believe anything,” he said. 

“Sex toy my *ss!” 

 

 

 

 

Edited January 5, 2021 by fangless

[fangless]

The business is doing badly and one of two people from middle management will have to go.

It’s not an easy decision, as both Theresa and Jack have been there a long time and they’re both very good. The first one to leave work tomorrow will get their cards, decides the Personnel Manager; that’s the only way he can think of doing it.

 

The following evening, 30 minutes before she usually leaves, Theresa tells Jack she has a bad headache. It could be a migraine coming on, so she’s going to go home early. As she gets her coat, the Personnel Manager spots her and decides to take immediate action. He goes over to her and says, 
“There’s something I have to say to you, Theresa. I’m going to have to lay you or Jack off.” 

“Jack off!” she retorted angrily. “I’ve got a bad headache.” 

[fangless]

A man walks up to the bar and asks for an entendre. 
“Would you like a single or a double?” asks the barmaid. 
“A double please,” he replies. 
“OK, Sir, so yours is a large one.” 

[fangless]

“It’s no good, Mrs Smith, I can’t find anything physically wrong with you, it must be the effects of too much drinking,” said the doctor. 

“Well, in that case I’ll come back when you’re sober!” exclaimed the woman. 
 

[sanuk711]

[roo860]

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[sanuk711]

 

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