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Posted

A beer bottle sits down next to a mirror.

A beer bottle starts talking to the mirror.

"If you break me, you'll get 1 year of bad luck!"

The mirror replies, "Are you kidding? thats nothing, with me you get 7 years of bad luck!"

Then they hear a bunch of laughter from behind them. Turning around, they find themselves looking at a condom.

  • Like 1
Posted

A guy is looking for a job and sees an application for an obstetrical assistant who has to trim patients "private parts" and rub oil there in preparation for the session. He tells the officer, "I'd like to apply for that one" and the officer says he has to go up to Sudbury. (Way the hell up north!)

What? The job's in Sudbury he asks?

No, it's here. That's just the end of the line.

  • Haha 1
Posted

A station wagon was driven in reverse and accidently runs into the Armor Hot Dog car.  The driver exits and says to the driver of the Armor Hot Dog car, "Damn is that all you can put up my rear"......

  • Haha 1
Posted

Last night I told my wife I was feeling horny.

"Well, we can soon sort that out," she said with a wink, and slowly undressed.

buck me, she was right...

I stopped feeling horny immediately!

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

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