Neighbour was angry with me today. Dont know what to do.

[jak2002003]

I read through this treat, but think I must have missed something.

 

Am I right in thinking the OP is calling the police to come to prevent an elderly couple somehow stopping work on his property?

 

Are the old couple going to block off the road and start a protest?  Are they dangerous?

 

Did the OP upset them by not informing them about the work and then proceeding to splatter their property with wet concrete and then just offer then 500 baht and expect that was the polite and correct thing to do????  He did not even offer to clean it up?

 

Really, calling 2 police to come to this petty  little situation is a massive overreaction and pathetic thing to do... and it will lead to more problems for the OP than an old lady waving at him in an annoyed way.

 

He is going to make himself very unpopular in his community... no wonder his poor wife (who he never allows time off work) does not want to get involved.  

 

 

Edited July 16, 2020 by jak2002003

[tandor]

20 hours ago, Malawi said:

Just ignore the old bat.

...the builder should have spoken with all parties including the tessabaan/village head prior..IMHO

[bbabythai]

5 hours ago, FritsSikkink said:

Are you a builder so you know it isn't possible or are you not willing to spend money on a solution that could have prevented this.

Your wife works 24/7?

Offering 500 THB is an insult but offering 10% discount on your business is ridiculous. why would they need to spend money in your business to get compensated? You probably will still make a profit on that.

Now you want to invade their space without consent.

 

You should have talked with them before you started working, bring a nice present, have some drinks and tell them about your issues and ask for their help.  

we wrote them a letter a week ago to which they did not respond. They are beyond reproach. As discussed above they are rude and put their hand up like a stop sign. 

[ravip]

1 minute ago, bbabythai said:

we wrote them a letter a week ago to which they did not respond. They are beyond reproach. As discussed above they are rude and put their hand up like a stop sign. 

LOL... why?

[bbabythai]

3 hours ago, pookondee said:

IMO, you have been given some amazingly silly advice on this thread.

Especially the silly 1990's style advice on wai'ing. ridiculous

 

And after whats happened already, the pot-plant/gift thing is just as bad.

She will probably end up throwing it at you.

 

IMO, The only sound advice was the people who said "leave it to the Thais"

 

If it were me i would have made myself scarce during the whole process.

 

The bossman or people doing the job would have easily dealt with the old lady, Thai style.

 

Another thing ive noticed, hanging around squarking at the workers and checking up/telling them what to do, NEVER gets you anywhere in Thailand.

 

In fact, when you do that, dont be suprised if you end up with faults you didnt notice, that later end up being a big P in the A!

your last 2 paragraphs are extremely true. Might explain why I paid for 2 new windows that now leak inside

[Tagged]

What kind of neighborhoo is it? High so class? Middle class? 
 

If you sent a neighbour warning, just put up your biggest smile and say mai pen rai, give them food on the door, if not taken, just continue to do so, they will feel they lost face after awhile! Just be good and continue to be good, no explanation, and never ssk for permition for doing anything on your property, just do it. 
 

 

[fittobethaied]

You will definitely need to cement render the exposed side even if the interior is rendered. My stepson just experienced that and after the first rain this season the room flooded.

[ravip]

5 minutes ago, Tagged said:

What kind of neighborhoo is it? High so class? Middle class? 
 

If you sent a neighbour warning, just put up your biggest smile and say mai pen rai, give them food on the door, if not taken, just continue to do so, they will feel they lost face after awhile! Just be good and continue to be good, no explanation, and never ssk for permition for doing anything on your property, just do it. 
 

 

LOL... whatever the neighbourhood class, just evaluate you own class... 

[balo]

Tell them you have friends high up,  local police boss or mafia, that should work . 

[Dap]

Seems you've tried to be neighborly, forthcoming and polite. Now do what needs to be done w/o encroaching on their domain and be done with it. Unfortunately, nothing you say or do will be met with any cordial response. Get it all done as quickly and professionally as possible and cease all attempts to communicate any further. Good luck.

[Neeranam]

21 hours ago, bbabythai said:

If they do try to stop us I will have to get very angry and raise my voice

So many things weird in this post. 

 

Offering someone 500 baht for dropping cement on their garden? Did you think they might have some pride? 

Why all the gestures? Did you speak/write to them in Thai? 

 

As for raising your voice and upsetting them  sounds like you're a people pleaser.

[Bigz]

21 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Never initiate a wai to someone of lesser social/financial/educational status than yourself.

They will see you as inferior or weak.

This comment makes you a self righteous <deleted>. You are absolutely wrong in every way you observe the world around you. Your type would feel at home in rural India surrounded by dalits. I bet you still can have a little fun in Thailand feeling supreme but one day you'll pay.

[Gandtee]

21 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Given farangs don't know how to wai properly, the OP may have insulted her by doing it wrong.

Why wai? Even a wee wai. Why oh why do we wai?????

Edited July 16, 2020 by Gandtee
Additional words.

[BritManToo]

4 minutes ago, Bigz said:

This comment makes you a self righteous <deleted>. You are absolutely wrong in every way you observe the world around you. Your type would feel at home in rural India surrounded by dalits. I bet you still can have a little fun in Thailand feeling supreme but one day you'll pay.

I merely commented on how the system works.

You want to wai wait staff, m/c taxi guys and bar girls ......... feel free.

 

Edited July 16, 2020 by BritManToo

[Neeranam]

11 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I merely commented on how the system works.

You want to wai wait staff, m/c taxi guys and bar girls ......... feel free.

 

That's not what you said. It was totally wrong.

[BritManToo]

Just now, Neeranam said:

That's not what you said. It was totally wrong.

Defaulted on your mortgage yet?

[Bigz]

3 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I merely commented on how the system works.

You want to wai wait staff, m/c taxi guys and bar girls ......... feel free.

 

I do wai to 'lower' class people when I feel appropriate out of respect. Obviously not going too silly by wai-ing everyone (including the cab driver) You however stated that no wai should be given for lower class or poorer people than you because it makes you look weak...this makes you an arrogant, ungrateful <deleted>. And don't forget that one day when you are weak those 'dalits' will remember how you've treated them. 

[BritManToo]

My original post ..........

"Never initiate a wai to someone of lesser social/financial/educational status than yourself."

You can't fix stupid, but you can ignore stupid ......... goodbye.

Edited July 16, 2020 by BritManToo

[hotandsticky]

3 minutes ago, Bigz said:

I do wai to 'lower' class people when I feel appropriate out of respect. Obviously not going too silly by wai-ing everyone (including the cab driver) You however stated that no wai should be given for lower class or poorer people than you because it makes you look weak...this makes you an arrogant, ungrateful <deleted>. And don't forget that one day when you are weak those 'dalits' will remember how you've treated them. 

 

 

I don't think you understand Thai culture or their hierarchical structures................. you wouldn't see a Thai doing it  -  or waiing at 7-11 staff, that I have seen wannabe Thai Farangs do. 

[Sart Bimpson]

Please dont make trouble here.

it is just not worth it.

 

stay happy and stay peaceful.

 

Sart. 

[Neeranam]

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

My original post ..........

"Never initiate a wai to someone of lesser social/financial/educational status than yourself."

You can't fix stupid, but you can ignore stupid ......... goodbye.

What is your educational status?

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, Neeranam said:

What is your educational status?

Way beyond any Thai (or expat) I'm likely to meet .... along with my age and wealth.

Edited July 16, 2020 by BritManToo

[Skeptic7]

If the situation was reversed...no Thai would give a ????-less about you, nor give you a thought or a care. "Eff" her! Just give them that stupid Thai smile and carry on with your project. 

[innosiem]

6 hours ago, bbabythai said:

I respect all the replies on this thread but this is the advice I will take. I talked to my staff about the idea and they agree, given the circumstances, that police presence will prevent further issues tomorrow. I just got back from the station and the boss of traffic cop dept said he can do it. I said we just need 1 guy for 1 hour at the beginning. We didnt mention any issues with the neighbours. He said 'oh you need the premium service. 2 guys..' I asked how much and of course he didnt tell me. Anyways, if it means the old lady will not be able to stop me doing the job tomorrow then its worth it. I also intend to take the mother in law. Same age and I think it will work if she translates for me. My wife cannot leave our business. 

 

cheers for your help.

don't forget to give her a gift
a simple fruit basket will do
mother in law could bring it????
then they could talk about you????

Edited July 16, 2020 by innosiem

[Bigz]

1 minute ago, hotandsticky said:

 

 

I don't think you understand Thai culture or their hierarchical structures................. you wouldn't see a Thai doing it  -  or waiing at 7-11 staff, that I have seen wannabe Thai Farangs do. 

No mate. You don't understand what I wrote. Read again maybe? I don't wai to taxi drivers or 7/11 staff or bar sluts or at the market, restaurant. I do wai however when appropriate even to poorer or uneducated people. Including poor old relatives, family friends on first meeting and so on. Britman stated that this shouldn't be done and I find his comment outrageous. By his logic you should initiate wai to everyone who is more rich or educated. No thanks, I don't live by your pretentious standards.

[Kadilo]

You wouldn’t catch the Spanish doing it. No wai Jose!

[alacrity]

You must have employed exceedingly messy workers for your debris to fall on another's property.

Why use a cherry picker when there should easily be enough space to erect a scaffold?

[sead]

Rent a cop

Edited July 16, 2020 by sead

[Neeranam]

41 minutes ago, Bigz said:

bar sluts

A breath of fresh air, instead of people pretending they're not and calling them 'bar girls' as if they don't sell their bodies.

[vinny41]

7 hours ago, bbabythai said:

I respect all the replies on this thread but this is the advice I will take. I talked to my staff about the idea and they agree, given the circumstances, that police presence will prevent further issues tomorrow. I just got back from the station and the boss of traffic cop dept said he can do it. I said we just need 1 guy for 1 hour at the beginning. We didnt mention any issues with the neighbours. He said 'oh you need the premium service. 2 guys..' I asked how much and of course he didnt tell me. Anyways, if it means the old lady will not be able to stop me doing the job tomorrow then its worth it. I also intend to take the mother in law. Same age and I think it will work if she translates for me. My wife cannot leave our business. 

 

cheers for your help.

I think you need to ensure that your wife is there tomorrow when the cherry picker arrives ( I assume she also wants the work completed)

On this thread you keep mentioned your business, your staff but recently you mentioned that you don't have a WP

immigration might have given you the okay to paint the fence or cut the grass as part of your marriage extension

hiring a cherry picker and giving instructions to a construction team might be considered outside their scope of what you can do within a marriage extension

involving the police just will confirm to immigration what your role is, all immigration have to do is ask the police did the wife ask for your assistance or was it the farang