Illegitimate Child

[theonetrueaussie]

I have had gfs in the past who did the same when I broke up with them. They said the same thing....I'm pregnant you have to come back to me or I'm pregnant I need money now....I just blocked them....Saw one of them 7 months later and told her she looked great for being 7 months pregnant and having no belly at all...Odds of her actually being pregnant are slim to none if she told you that AFTER you have broken up with them..

[Preacher]

1 hour ago, orlov said:

How does this square with advice on the internet from one family lawyer that states “For children who are born outside a marriage in Thailand the biological father is not required by law to pay child support......” At this stage I’m simply trying to understand Thai law, nothing more. 

That statement is true, but not the full story. If not married the law can't presume who the father is. But with a paternity suit the courts will establish who the father is. The biological father than also becomes the legal father, with all attached responsibilities.  

[BritManToo]

3 hours ago, bkk6060 said:

The law and doing the right thing do not always fall hand in hand.

I would accompany her to confirm if you are the father.  I would hope any man would want to know if he reproduced another human being.

Anyone who doesn't or does not take financial responsibility after confirmation, is a disgusting irresponsible troll who should probably burn in hell..

Never bothered me, and I never use a condom.

Her body, her choice, her baby.

It's only 40bht for the morning after pill ..... up to her how she spends the 1,000bht I just gave her..

[BritManToo]

2 hours ago, orlov said:

How does this square with advice on the internet from one family lawyer that states “For children who are born outside a marriage in Thailand the biological father is not required by law to pay child support......” At this stage I’m simply trying to understand Thai law, nothing more. 

It's nonsense posted by a wannabe white knight.

If you're not married, you have no legal responsibility towards any children you father in Thailand.

If you are married, there is no financial responsibility towards any children you father, unless you are employed and pay tax in Thailand.

[BritManToo]

3 hours ago, mr mr said:

deny deny deny. then book the first reparation flight out of dodge. 

Usually just moving house with no forwarding address is enough.

[Odin Norway]

5 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

Yes, its not such a good idea to have unprotected sex with females whom you don't want to reproduce with .

  You would have to be an immoral person  to impregnate females and disregard the consequences , I.E, a baby .

  Shameful behavior 

Oh come on.I have had a few that pulled the condom of half way through.Do not come with your moral speach.

[Odin Norway]

3 hours ago, orlov said:

How does this square with advice on the internet from one family lawyer that states “For children who are born outside a marriage in Thailand the biological father is not required by law to pay child support......” At this stage I’m simply trying to understand Thai law, nothing more. 

Listen to what you have read.There is no law that say she can take you to court.In here its just the saints on their high horse riding their own moral.

[Odin Norway]

3 hours ago, wolf81 said:

I feel giving around 3.000 - 5.000 is a bit low. I guess it could be "kinda" ok if growing up on the Thai country side and grandparents take care of the child while the girlfriend works in some nearby farms, in the factory or in the city. Still, for the child I doubt it'll be a nice existence. 

 

I'd say pay at least 10.000 a month for a child. Sure, 10.000 THB is about the average monthly wage here on the country side, but if it's your biological child, surely you'd want the child to be in a somewhat better position, right? 

 

Better still would be to try to take custody of your own child, if your girlfriend can agree on that. You can make sure the child gets decent education and such. Can get a nanny to help take care, etc... More expensive surely, but imo better.

 

Best is if the child has good contact with both biological parents and both parents can get along well and both take care of the child, but I am sure that is out of the picture. There's been research done on children that are missing one of the most important figures in their lives (father figure / mother figure) and generally it can cause issues when the child grows up. 

 

As a father it's also possible to get a dependent visa, so that can make staying in Thailand long term easier.

Have you read what the O.P is writing at all. This is a blackmailing female that he dosnt want to see again.Do not even try to put girlfriend into it.Most likely one that is payd by the hour and had 4 others before him on the same day.Why would he even bother.If he was a thai man she wouldnt even dare to mention it.

 

[fredwiggy]

11 minutes ago, Odin Norway said:

Oh come on.I have had a few that pulled the condom of half way through.Do not come with your moral speach.

Acting like the local men here doesn't look good for foreigners. Making babies that you aren't taking care of is reprehensible behavior. Use a condom if you're having sex. It isn't all the woman's responsibility to prevent pregnancy. There are way too many children here without fathers, which by the way is an important person in their lives, as important as the mother. Children without dads are emotionally damaged from the start. Girls turn promiscuous and boys experiment with drugs, alcohol, and grow up thinking women are objects, much like some here. Their low self esteem hurts them into adulthood, and they in turn raise damaged children. A moral speech perhaps, but those that disagree are disturbed users that think their pleasure is all there is in a relationship, and don't take the responsibility if the child is born from it. If both people go into having sex with nothing on their minds but a good time, and understand the implications from it, and take precautions, no problem. But a lot of the time, someone gets hurt, and the children are the ones that suffer the most. If this is just a blackmailing female, then get a paternity test, period, and then go from there.

Edited August 13, 2020 by fredwiggy

[geworthomd]

I’m not sure what the question of responsibility vs irresponsibility is here. It is quite black and white. 
1.  Before you give any money she must supply proof. Insist on a joint DNA test. No test no proof equals no money. 
2.  If the test is positive then welcome to the humanitarian and responsible global male half of the planet, you are a father!  Think of your child growing up without a father. Think about the financial struggled they will have. Think about a single mother having to work. Step up to the plate and be a man. 
 

If she could get an abortion then you are responsible for half the bill. Considering the costs of raising a child through college I wonder if it might be easier for you to pay for all of the abortion 

 

i apologize to all if my post is a bit blunt. This isn’t meant to be offensive or tart. My directness is intended to man-up any man who might think about running away from his child like a mouse. The DNA test will simply answer the test of your responsibility vs being played only as a chess piece in her financial game of trying to capture the King. 

[SteveK]

It's funny in Thailand how many girls seem to realise they are pregnant a few days after being dumped. Or it could be that they are lying and trying to get more money, but Thais would never do such a thing!

[khunPer]

22 hours ago, orlov said:

Anybody know more about this subject?

The has been some reports in the later years where court has decided between 3,000 baht and 5,000 a month in child support from a father.

 

You should insist on a DNA test when the child is born, which is also necessary if you wish to be acknowledged as legal father; a name of a Thai birth certificate don't give you any parental rights, if not married to the mother.

 

Any good common sense, if a DNA test proves that you are the father, would IMHO be some level of support to your child...????

[Kurtf]

It seems to me that anyone with any morals would WANT to provide some support for a child they brought into the world. But then again morals seems to be a thing of the past. Someone that refused to help pay for the raising of their own child is just a piece of excrement.

[geworthomd]

I highly disagree with one post, “...her body her choice”. 
it takes two to reproduce. “Her body”, “your body”, condom (yes) or not (dumb), JOINTLY RESPONSIBLE. 
 

Yes there are scammers out there but no DNA test (you pay) then no money, even for an abortion. 
 

Thailand, or any place on this planet, can be a place for degenerates to come to thinking they can 2020 live the “hippie” lifestyle of running away from life’s responsibility. 
 

Look, we are guests in a society belonging to polite and socially responsible people who by their mercy, allow us to stay here. Should we contribute to the morality and family safety /family security?  When my father was alive he always said, “Put more i to your society than you take out”. Society has many different sizes that surround you. My intended definition is the people of Thailand as a whole. Dear father, if you can read this, I please forgive me. I am giving this man the opposite of your long-standing advice. If his society here is defined as his relation with a women, just the two of them, then he should take more of his man OUT of his society than he puts IN. 

[Max69xl]

6 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

Yes, its not such a good idea to have unprotected sex with females whom you don't want to reproduce with .

  You would have to be an immoral person  to impregnate females and disregard the consequences , I.E, a baby .

  Shameful behavior 

How do you know she is pregnant? Have you met her earlier? 

[SteveK]

Don't believe a photo of a positive pregnancy test either!

[RocketDog]

OP. Two questions to guide your decision. 

1. Is the child truly yours? 

2.do you have any reason to suspect the child would not need addional support beyond what the mother could provide. 

If the answer is no to both questions then ignore the issue and party on as you have been without regard to consequences.

 

Otherwise you face a moral decision.

 

Good luck. A condom no doubt seems a fair tradeoff at this point in your life. 

[CorpusChristie]

20 minutes ago, RocketDog said:

OP. Two questions to guide your decision. 

1. Is the child truly yours? 

2.do you have any reason to suspect the child would not need addional support beyond what the mother could provide. 

If the answer is no to both questions then ignore the issue and party on as you have been without regard to consequences.

 

Otherwise you face a moral decision.

 

Good luck. A condom no doubt seems a fair tradeoff at this point in your life. 

Also the minor point of a Child growing up without a Father and also not knowing who is Father is 

[Road Warrior]

old story from many thai women , your the father ???????????????????//  do like 90% thai men -- disappear !!!!

[geworthomd]

I’m so sorry but by the time I finished my edit the time expired. 
1.  Urine and blood (beta HCG laboratory test will prove if she is pregnant). Start with the drug story urine test strip. If positive then insist on the blood test. 
 

You still don’t know if it is yours and you won’t be able to confirm without a DNA test. The DNA test is performed after the child is born or if there is another reason for an amniocentesis, for example to check for birth defects. This is common in western countries. 
 

Though you are not morally or financially responsible until you are provided proof it is yours, an abortion paid bu you is cheaper than putting a child through college. There is no education better than experience. 
 

In practice the BCP is only 91% effective in a population study if added human error is taken into consideration. We all see better results. When taken per instructions and not forgetting then it is 99% effective in many populations. I think this may not be high enough in responsible people because that would mean 1 pregnancy for every 100 times sex. If we have 10 friends and they each had sex 10 times then one of them would get pregnant. We just don’t see it existentially that high. 
 

However, do you trust her to be able to follow the instructions 100% of the time?  Does she have the money to pay for them without being embarrassed to ask you for that money each month?  Are there other reasons why she would not want to take her BCP’s?  
 

if she does give birth to your child then he or she is your responsibility. Most every western countries will allow citizenship for that child with a positive DNA test so you can’t hide. You can be sued in your own country. My final advice is to be careful out there. This is a great society and they allow us to be here as their guests. Yes, there ate emotional scammers in every country. For those women, be very clear of your algorithm for decision making. Pay directly to the hospital for any abortion.  You may want a Beta HCG to chase her off if she is not pregnant. Pay directly to the hospital for any bills at all. When the child is born u can get a DNA test and find out if it is yours. If it is then man-up. If it isn’t then learn and evolve. 

[CorpusChristie]

11 minutes ago, Road Warrior said:

old story from many thai women , your the father ???????????????????//  do like 90% thai men -- disappear !!!!

Did you do your survey in Pattaya bars ?

[Elkski]

Rough lesson in life. I'm sure Sleepless nights.  X a

 Why do you think it's yours?   Don't assume this. 

If you do suspect its yours you may care if this  woman eats well for 9 months and no drugs or drinking.   A damaged child could make things much worse.  Of course insist on a DNA test before deciding your final actions.  I would think it would feel terrible to so a runner and never knowing.   Get cut as soon as your finished  with babies. 

[The Theory]

[khunPer]

2 hours ago, geworthomd said:

Pay directly to the hospital for any abortion.

Abortion is illegal in Thailand, need to be rape or incest; or doctor's in case of mother's illness.

[brewsterbudgen]

5 minutes ago, khunPer said:

Abortion is illegal in Thailand, need to be rape or incest; or doctor's in case of mother's illness.

Like most things in Thailand, while technically illegal, it's possible to have a legal abortion.

 

https://pda.or.th/contact-us/

[ericthai]

12 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

I expect Western males to act more responsibly than poorly educated, poor third world prostitutes 

Wow, so now the guys girlfriend is a prostitute?

[snowgard]

12 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

I expect Western males to act more responsibly than poorly educated, poor third world prostitutes 

And I think that someone who calls all Thai women (who him don't know or saw) prostitutes is an <deleted> and misogynist.

[CorpusChristie]

1 hour ago, snowgard said:

And I think that someone who calls all Thai women (who him don't know or saw) prostitutes is an <deleted> and misogynist.

The females in question , these guys having unprotected sex with , are quite clearly paid for encounters and they are indeed prostitutes .

  I never suggested that all Thai females are prostitutes  

[GAZZPA]

Firstly, you do need to confirm it is your baby, assuming she is not lying about the pregnancy. If it does work out you are the father then surely you would want to pay a fair allowance for the child? Would you not want to have anything to do with the child if he/she is yours? So first things first you want a test to prove the child is yours, it is, I believe a common scam to extract money from you. 

[GAZZPA]

13 hours ago, CorpusChristie said:

Also the minor point of a Child growing up without a Father and also not knowing who is Father is 

absolutely,,, I do hope if the child is his he takes full responsibility and stays in the childs life. The child would be able to get a passport from his fathers country and potentially a better education/life (depending on where the father is from but I am assuming the West).