Why did you marry? And maybe why did you do it again?

[OneMoreFarang 39681]

Lots of people get married, and lots of people get divorced.

And many do it again, and maybe again. Why?

 

Personally I never married. From teenager age until now I saw too many unhappy couples. And too many guys who married, divorced and paid a fortune.

I am happy with my gf, since many years, and she mentioned marrying often enough (until she gave up mentioning it). I just don't see the point of signing a contract which has, from my point of view, only negative sides.

But lots of guys marry, including lots of farangs in Thailand. Why did you do it? And would you do it again?

 

I was inspired by this thread and all the people who would tell their 18yo self not to marry...

 

[BritManToo 65735]

6 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

But lots of guys marry, including lots of farangs in Thailand. Why did you do it? And would you do it again?

Why not, there's no downside to marriage in Thailand.

You can still bang other women, and you get a VISA extension with 400k in the bank.

[CANSIAM 1235]

16 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Why not, there's no downside to marriage in Thailand.

You can still bang other women, and you get a VISA extension with 400k in the bank.

Lol its not true love, its about a 400k saving or at least access to it to do as you wish...........

[BritManToo 65735]

Just now, CANSIAM said:

Lol its not true love, its about a 400k saving or at least access to it to do as you wish...........

Topic isn't about love, it's about marriage.

[jerrymahoney 1630]

One reason I decided, or was willing, to get married for the first time anywhere in Thailand is because there is 'sin tua' being that property acquired before marriage is not common marital property, and for me that is everything.

 

 

[OneMoreFarang 39681]

15 minutes ago, jerrymahoney said:

One reason I decided, or was willing, to get married for the first time anywhere in Thailand is because there is 'sin tua' being that property acquired before marriage is not common marital property, and for me that is everything.

Maybe I am a little slow this morning. Why is that a reason to get married? 

[ezzra 54684]

One topic i will not be able to reply to, in my early 70' and never married, why? good question, do i feel better/worse/different/sorry/lucky or any other emotions? truthfully, i don't know and probably will never know either...

[jerrymahoney 1630]

9 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Maybe I am a little slow this morning. Why is that a reason to get married? 

It is not a reason to get married. It is a reason that, if I decide to walk, she gets nothing other than the most basic household expenses.

Edited August 2 by jerrymahoney

[JayClay 1438]

People change. It's a fact of life. There's no guarantee that you will both change along the same path so there's no guarantee you will both feel the same way about each other forever. None.

 

The issue with being married is that you have to go through the break-up process twice, as at some point you need to get divorced. That doesn't particularly appeal to me.

[PJ71 577]

i married for the money!

[jerrymahoney 1630]

41 minutes ago, JayClay said:

People change. It's a fact of life. There's no guarantee that you will both change along the same path so there's no guarantee you will both feel the same way about each other forever. None.

 

The issue with being married is that you have to go through the break-up process twice, as at some point you need to get divorced. That doesn't particularly appeal to me.

It seems to me there are enough instances on here where a guy tells his Thai GF that they cannot get married because he is still married back in USofA, UK, etc. and his wife will not give him a divorce other than under unacceptable (to him ) terms.

 

So even if you choose to move on, divorce is not always the best way to go.

Edited August 2 by jerrymahoney

[jerrymahoney 1630]

24 minutes ago, PJ71 said:

i married for the money!

I married for a new house with a 25m swimming pool

[Jerno 1638]

Keep saying no to your gf about marriage and eventually she will leave you or regularly bang your neighbor behind your back.  If you are ok with either, then you should not marry her as you are not the least bit committed to a real relationship, and she's just a convenient companion, and that's it.  

[userabcd 2219]

Got married because it was the right thing to do and not take advantage of being in a one sided relationship with another human being.

[Gaccha 324]

A key point not recognised by those celebrating the frugal divorce laws in Thailand in this thread: it is where you are resident which determines what laws apply. 

 

If you marry in Thailand,  live in Thailand for 8 years, then move to England for 6 months... then the English Law applies to your divorce.

 

It follows that if your priority is maintaining financial health, marriage restricts your movement around the globe.

 

The benefits are trivial; the cost is extraordinary. 

[KhunLA 7334]

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Why not, there's no downside to marriage in Thailand.

You can still bang other women, and you get a VISA extension with 400k in the bank.

Agree 100%.  If not married, I couldn't not invest in RE the first 19 yrs here.  I would have had to wait till daughter was 20, since not a fan of condo market.  Three house and 9 plots of land later, and I've basically lived here rent free for 22 yrs in houses I had built.  Renting only while in between owning with wife #3 & GF now wife #4.

 

Within 1 or 2 yrs of marriage, you'll know if investing is a good idea or not.  If skeptical, simply don't.  No rocket science needed.

 

Could have stayed vested in the stock market, if not wanting to touch savings, but that's actually work, and not what I consider retired, which I came here to do.

 

That extra 10-25k a month saved on owning vs renting, wife & daughter are welcome to it, after I depart.  

Edited August 2 by KhunLA

[sipi 6335]

I got married late and became a father even later. It just happened that way.

Best thing I ever did. My wife is my best mate and my son is like a little brother.

Everyone else I know my age got married early, and divorced, and carrying baggage.

[CANSIAM 1235]

1 hour ago, Jerno said:

Keep saying no to your gf about marriage and eventually she will leave you or regularly bang your neighbor behind your back.  If you are ok with either, then you should not marry her as you are not the least bit committed to a real relationship, and she's just a convenient companion, and that's it.  

I guess its quite possible she may bang your neighbour regardless.......

[KhunLA 7334]

26 minutes ago, sipi said:

I got married late and became a father even later. It just happened that way.

Best thing I ever did. My wife is my best mate and my son is like a little brother.

Everyone else I know my age got married early, and divorced, and carrying baggage.

I didn't do the kid thing, early on, as waited till I knew I had the finance to allow me to have the time to raise a wee one.   Actually the now wife, was part of that, since having the 'daughter' and know she would need a woman in her life also.  Since compatible to both, after 8 yrs of living together, marriage wasn't much of a leap.

[jerrymahoney 1630]

Even if I decided to walk, I see no need for a divorce.

 

[KIngsofisaan 838]

Some men will do the right thing for their families, some men will think they are doing the right thing for themselves.

 

Either avenue will elicit negative responses from the other side.

 

Those that always do the right thing for themselves, will never understand those that do the right thing for their families.

 

 

 

 

[Dante99 3359]

3 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I just don't see the point of signing a contract which has, from my point of view, only negative sides.

Positive sides from another point of view, the wife's but who cares about her really.  Nice.

[KIngsofisaan 838]

1 hour ago, KhunLA said:

Agree 100%.  If not married, I couldn't not invest in RE the first 19 yrs here.  I would have had to wait till daughter was 20, since not a fan of condo market.  Three house and 9 plots of land later, and I've basically lived here rent free for 22 yrs in houses I had built.  Renting only while in between owning with wife #3 & GF now wife #4.

 

Within 1 or 2 yrs of marriage, you'll know if investing is a good idea or not.  If skeptical, simply don't.  No rocket science needed.

 

Could have stayed vested in the stock market, if not wanting to touch savings, but that's actually work, and not what I consider retired, which I came here to do.

 

That extra 10-25k a month saved on owning vs renting, wife & daughter are welcome to it, after I depart.  

Good on you, to think of them in your plans when you are no longer here.

[actonion 1831]

i married 3 times, friends say  its because i like wedding cake 

[KIngsofisaan 838]

2 hours ago, JayClay said:

People change. It's a fact of life. There's no guarantee that you will both change along the same path so there's no guarantee you will both feel the same way about each other forever. None.

 

The issue with being married is that you have to go through the break-up process twice, as at some point you need to get divorced. That doesn't particularly appeal to me.

What in life is guaranteed except death?

 

There is  also NO guarantee neither of you will change and you will still be happily together till death do you both part.

 

 

 

 

[1FinickyOne 10755]

I "married' here and before that, back home... though never had a legal government marriage if that counts...

 

The reason I 'married' here was so that my wife could hold her head high in the village and the parents could get sin sod... it was a village wedding w/no paper. You might call it a symbolic commitment. 

 

The reason one would marry is companionship and family... 

[jerrymahoney 1630]

1 hour ago, KhunLA said:

Renting only while in between owning with wife #3 & GF now wife #4.

They say our love won't pay the rent

'Fore it's earned our money's all been spent

 

-- but I Got You, Babe

[sawadee1947 4569]

4 hours ago, CANSIAM said:

Lol its not true love, its about a 400k saving or at least access to it to do as you wish...........

Well, that's reason enough

[sawadee1947 4569]

16 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

I "married' here and before that, back home... though never had a legal government marriage if that counts...

 

The reason I 'married' here was so that my wife could hold her head high in the village and the parents could get sin sod... it was a village wedding w/no paper. You might call it a symbolic commitment. 

 

The reason one would marry is companionship and family... 

Yeah, in later or actually the very last years it's true companionship and a free nurse at home who will burn you some happy day

[jerrymahoney 1630]

39 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

I "married' here and before that, back home... though never had a legal government marriage if that counts...

 

The reason I 'married' here was so that my wife could hold her head high in the village and the parents could get sin sod... it was a village wedding w/no paper. You might call it a symbolic commitment. 

 

The reason one would marry is companionship and family... 

I was just the opposite: I said that I will go through all the legalities up to the meeting and papers  at the amphur office but I am not going through one of those village-type marriage ceremonies.