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What was the outcome when your daughter found out your TGF was younger than her?


Nemises

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33 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

Paedophilia is a crime whether it involves boys or girls.  Not sure why you find "old western guys" with young boys more creepy than if they're with young girls!  As long as the boy or girl is 18+ what difference does it make?

Depends on the age of the boys and girls. Pedophilia involves prepubescent children. Someone involved with postpubescent minors would be a child molester. 

 

I don't see any 70-year-olds walking around with 20-year-olds unless it's their daughter. 

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38 minutes ago, FarAngMoh said:

My family (my mother in particular) had a hard time accepting me marrying a non-white. My father-in-law was even more repulsed about his daughter marrying a non-Asian, so much so that it took over 10 years before he finally consented (grudgingly) and then we got married, that was 20 years ago (and the ice still hasn’t thawed completely).


I think any family that genuinely loves you will understand in time… no matter if it’s age gap or whatever, as long as you are happy. 

I wish I'd had a FIL to be that so disliked me marrying her that we didn't for 10 years as after 5 years we'd be separated, and I'd still be living in LOS.

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4 hours ago, jak2002003 said:

Would you guys be fine with your 20 year old good looking  daughters marrying an overweight 70 year old Thai immigrant to your country, who was only there on a retirement visa and could not speak a word of your own language, and who already had grown up kids and an ex wife? 

It doesn't really compare.

 

If your daughter was from a very poor country with little social welfare, she didn't have a bright future, maybe had a kid already or had worked in prostitution and no one from her own country would marry her, and by being with the much older foreign guy she would have a much better future, then it might compare a little better.

 

People might be OK with it.

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3 hours ago, Neeranam said:

My father said to me once, just after I'd taken him to Nana plaza, that he'd come here and get a young woman when my mother died. I was shocked! However, he died before my mother. 

I have known a few old dudes whose daughters didn't speak to them, and I understand why, they basically were sex addicts and their addiction caused them to forget their kids and grandkids. 

So, you imagine it as a choice between being there for the grandkids, or having a younger Thai wife?  You cannot do both? 

 

When you have children or grandkids, you have to stay in that country and cannot have a younger wife?  Otherwise you have to give up contact with them altogether?

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5 hours ago, Neeranam said:

My father said to me once, just after I'd taken him to Nana plaza, that he'd come here and get a young woman when my mother died. I was shocked! However, he died before my mother. 

I have known a few old dudes whose daughters didn't speak to them, and I understand why, they basically were sex addicts and their addiction caused them to forget their kids and grandkids. 

I forgot my kids the moment they left my house.

What they do, and with whom, is no longer my business and vice versa.

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1 hour ago, BangkokReady said:

It doesn't really compare.

 

If your daughter was from a very poor country with little social welfare, she didn't have a bright future, maybe had a kid already or had worked in prostitution and no one from her own country would marry her, and by being with the much older foreign guy she would have a much better future, then it might compare a little better.

 

People might be OK with it.

That seems like exploitation of young girls becasue they are poor. 

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27 minutes ago, Yellowtail said:

You (and people like you) think opening a factory and giving impoverished people jobs is exploiting them as well, yes? 

 

Go to a third world country and hand out someone else's money to make the people dependent and you're a hero. 

 

Go to a third world country and spend your own money to build a factory and teach people skills that make them independent and you're exploiting them. 

 

Almost any transaction involves exploitation of some kind. Usually it's mutual.

 

Rich and poor countries exist. This difference allows people to open factories in poor countries in order to make their products for a lower cost. Generally the jobs are better than others, hence people work there. If the wages weren't lower, people would simply manufacture their products back home.

 

Women who marry older men for money have a choice whether they do it or not. They obviously think their life will be better.

 

Why is no one up in arms about women who are with fat ugly men their own age? Surely those women don't find fat ugly men attractive and it must be more about money? Why is this concern reserved for women with men older than them? Very telling.

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The other thing goes through my head is the fate of kids born of age disparate relationships.

 

You may alienate kids from previous relationships since your new gf/wife may well be the same age as them, but what about the kids you spawn with that 20 something Thai gf?

 

We've all seen it, the 60/70 something with the 20 something slopping around the mall with a couple of rugrats.

 

Those kids are never going to experience growing up with Dad. 

 

First prom, first terrifying meeting with bf/gf, Dad teaching them how drive, just goofing off playing ball, and the delight of grandkids.

 

Thats part of a kids upbringing and for many a child of an elderly Dad those things just ain't gonna happen

Edited by GinBoy2
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49 minutes ago, jak2002003 said:

That seems like exploitation of young girls becasue they are poor. 

The girl can always refuse, unless you are suggesting that they are forced to marry old farangs. Perhaps they'd rather be exploited than live in poverty.

 

BTW, nurses have long been exploited in western countries because they won't go on strike for a decent wage, so are you going to lobby the government to raise nurse wages to what they deserve, or is it OK because no old men are involved in shagging them?

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3 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

The other thing goes through my head is the fate of kids born of age disparate relationships.

 

You may alienate kids from previous relationships since your new gf/wife may well be the same age as them, but what about the kids you spawn with that 20 something Thai gf?

 

We've all seen it, the 60/70 something with the 20 something slopping around the mall with a couple of rugrats.

 

Those kids are never going to experience growing up with Dad. 

 

First prom, first terrifying meeting with bf/gf, Dad teaching them how drive, just goofing off playing ball, and the delight of grandkids.

 

Thats part of a kids upbringing and for many a child of an elderly Dad those things just ain't gonna happen

Only reason I can come up with for those women to want to have kids with ancient men is that IMO they provide a guaranteed income till the kid is at least old enough to get a job. I can't work out why the ancient men want more kids.

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9 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

Those kids are never going to experience growing up with Dad. 

My Brit wife divorced me, so that's another couple of kids not growing up with dad.

Single moms are everywhere these days.

 

When I was teaching in UK high schools (2009), not having a dad seemed to be the norm.

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Just now, BritManToo said:

My Brit wife divorced me, so that's another couple of kids not growing up with dad.

Single moms are everywhere these days.

There are single Mom's I agree, but you aren't dead!

 

The single Mom who at 25 married a 70 year old guy is going to have a child with a dead Father before that kid is an adult

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45 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

Those kids are never going to experience growing up with Dad. 

I wonder if they would choose mot to exist.

 

It still might be better than the alternative. The woman might not have the choice of having a guy at home her own age.

 

Isn't a husband and dad who's around for 10-20 years and leaves her financially secure better than the alternative? Being alone, or possibly getting a "sperm donor"?

 

I think, perhaps, the critics of these relationships are imagining (possibly deliberately) a woman who could easily have a happy life, with an atractive man of her own age, some kids, etc., but is forced into a relationship by an evil White man. I don't believe that to be the case.

Edited by BangkokReady
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34 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

There are single Mom's I agree, but you aren't dead!

 

The single Mom who at 25 married a 70 year old guy is going to have a child with a dead Father before that kid is an adult

The single Mom who at 25 does not marry a 70 year old guy is going to have a child without a father from the get. 

 

Would a stream of boyfriends be better? At least the mother (and child) might have a house and a little dough to fall back on. 

 

Edited by Yellowtail
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2 hours ago, BangkokReady said:

So, you imagine it as a choice between being there for the grandkids, or having a younger Thai wife?  You cannot do both? 

 

When you have children or grandkids, you have to stay in that country and cannot have a younger wife?  Otherwise you have to give up contact with them altogether?

I know what addiction is and have overcome mine, to alcohol and drugs. 

I feel sorry for those sex addicts that put their addiction ahead of their family. 

 

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On 7/7/2023 at 7:46 AM, BritManToo said:

Can't say I bother with my kids once they've moved out. Guess I'm a bad person.

am with you on that and really not bothered at all, it's my life they can do or think whatever they want, life goes on

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15 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

I know what addiction is and have overcome mine, to alcohol and drugs. 

I feel sorry for those sex addicts that put their addiction ahead of their family. 

 

Why would someone need to be a sex addict to marry a much younger woman?

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7 hours ago, Neeranam said:

I have a 20 year old and would not be happy with her hooking up with a 30 year old Thai guy, yet alone a 70 year old. 

love is blind and age it's just a number.... people should do whatever they want and whatever makes them feel good, no prejudgments we only live once

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16 minutes ago, Mavideol said:

love is blind and age it's just a number.... people should do whatever they want and whatever makes them feel good, no prejudgments we only live once

I agree with you, but what if the thing they "want" to do harms themselves or others? (I mean withing the law, but nonetheless, harmful.)

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