Lost in Translation: Your Funniest Misunderstandings with Thai Language

[Chris Daley]

Have you ever been completely lost in translation while talking to a Thai person, either due to language barriers or cultural differences?

 

I used to go to restaurant often and there was always a child that would take the order and bring the plates.  She even took the bill at the end.  She must have been about 8 years old.  Once day the little girl was not there so I said the twenty year old ''where is the little girl'' she had no idea what I meant.  So I said ''she is so cute''.  She just said thank you.

 

So now I am the stalker that likes the twenty year old and thinks she is cute.  Or she thinks the shop had a ghost girl in it.

 

Have you ever had a misunderstanding that you wish could just time travel and have the conversation again?

[liddelljohn]

Misprounouced  ''I want to eat shellfish  a few times  and seen a look of either horror or a smile  on waitress's face ,, say Phom  Dongan Kin Hoi  correct tone and thats I want to eat shellfish like , mussels ,etc    say it with wrong inflection  on ''Hoi'' and it means I want to eat your pussy!!!!!!!!!!!    got me a couple of nice  girlfriends  ha ha

[kidneyw]

Once ordered an Amarit beer and the waitress brought me an omelette. This was up in Fang, northern Thailand way back.

[Keeps]

When I first came to Thailand late 90's mobile phones weren't that common. I got friendly with an Italian restaurant owner and his wife had a telephone which you could use to phone home for a fee. She was a rather large lady and her name was Mo but I spent the first week calling her moo. At the time I didn't know this was the Thai word for pig. 

[BigStar]

Back in the early 2000s I visited a small, local TT&T office about my landline. Three ladies were working close together at the small counter.

 

After some discussion among themselves, they concluded that I'd have to come back the next day for necessary paperwork. One of them told me so.  

 

In the USA when you ask a shop owner/store employee, "What time do you open?" it's immediately understood you're referring to the shop's opening hours. Somewhat idiomatic, perhaps. 

 

Without really thinking it out, I mentally translated that question literally into Thai and asked it of the lady who'd just spoken to me.

 

All three burst out laughing.

 

[kickstart]

I first come to Thailand to work along with a small groupmate, few months went by one of my friends and myself were talking, and this subject come up my friend was working in a office ,and was introduced to his work colleges, one girl was called Moi, which he remembered after a few days he said something like where's Moi he got some very odd looks ,after a while he found out why ,moi in the wrong tone  is pubic hair ,and yes he said it in the wrong tone .

My wife and myself use to know a woman called Moi the odd time I have had to name her, I remember this episode.

I have been told they are 9 meanings for the word Khow I said once I am going to Ginn Khow, eat rice /have lunch, then someone said you are going to eat some one's knee, same word different tone.

[richard_smith237]

A misunderstanding with Tenglish... 

 

About 20 years ago my GF (ex) and I had been out for dinner....  I was meeting up with friends  afterwards and she had an early start, I stayed out, she took her car and drove back to mine.

We'd valet parked. When driving back she called me and told me that after collecting the car and driving out, upon exiting the restaurant car park the security guy told her that there was seamen on the car....  what ?

She explained to me that security had said it was because the car was valet parked near a building site...   I asked what on earth does she think happened, a load of labourers jacking off and spaffing over the cars below from 20 stories high ???

She said the security advised her to 'wipe it off' as it could damage the paint... I asked her what she thought the guys had been consuming to make their seamen so corrosive...   the conversation became a little heated, me suggesting don't be so ridiculous, the security guy was winding her up... and then also about to go to the security guy and asking what on earth he'd be saying to my GF... 

I left it...  GF was annoyed with me because I thought the hole thing was ridiculous. 

I got home, checked the car and saw some splashes of 'cement' on the bonnet which I had to clean off !!!...

She always pronounced her T's correctly after that !!!!

 

 

 

 

[bignok]

Sheet pronounced s h it

[animalmagic]

I was in a taxi in Hong Kong with my Chinese girlfriend and a colleague with his Thai wife.  He explained to his wife where we going in Thai and used the phrase 'gai-gai'.  Apparently, it means something like close to in Thai; in Chinese it is a slang word for pu**y.  My girlfriend was horrified then amused.

[2baht]

   Kee Ma, depending on the tone means either ride a horse or dog $#!t! Be careful!

[brianthainess]

Came here one time after I'd had an accident, and was using crutches to get around, I was in the shower and realized I'd forgotten  My Towel,  had a 'GF'  there and I called out to her for My Towel she brought me one of my crutches ??? that is when I learnt the Thai word for walking stick Mithea.  

[alien365]

I wanted some chicken breast from the market so naturally I asked for nom gai. I knew that nom meant both breast and milk in Thai. The seller looked confused so I did the British thing and said again but louder, naturally that attracted others' attention. I then asked one more time while making the boobs hand gesture (to make it clear I didn't mean chicken milk). They looked at me like I was crazy and they were certainly not amused. That was the day I learned to ask for og gai. 

[sikishrory]

12 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

A misunderstanding with Tenglish... 

 

About 20 years ago my GF (ex) and I had been out for dinner....  I was meeting up with friends  afterwards and she had an early start, I stayed out, she took her car and drove back to mine.

We'd valet parked. When driving back she called me and told me that after collecting the car and driving out, upon exiting the restaurant car park the security guy told her that there was seamen on the car....  what ?

She explained to me that security had said it was because the car was valet parked near a building site...   I asked what on earth does she think happened, a load of labourers jacking off and spaffing over the cars below from 20 stories high ???

She said the security advised her to 'wipe it off' as it could damage the paint... I asked her what she thought the guys had been consuming to make their seamen so corrosive...   the conversation became a little heated, me suggesting don't be so ridiculous, the security guy was winding her up... and then also about to go to the security guy and asking what on earth he'd be saying to my GF... 

I left it...  GF was annoyed with me because I thought the hole thing was ridiculous. 

I got home, checked the car and saw some splashes of 'cement' on the bonnet which I had to clean off !!!...

She always pronounced her T's correctly after that !!!!

 

 

 

 

This was my one as well.

I was at a bar drinking cocktails a couple of months ago. They had put a word peice of grey meringue on the top. The 3 girls all wanted to try it. One commented it was like "semen".

There was background music and a lot happening so I just smiled and said yea.

Then in my brain I thought, no I really need to get to the bottom of this.

So I asked "it's like what"?

Semen!

It took 3 times for me to realise she was saying cement but leaving the t off.

I immediately knew I had discovered a new favourite word to get Thais to say.

Old favourite was Ralph.

There's a good clip on this topic I'll try find.

 

[Gandtee]

Trying to impress my kids at the airport restaurant asked for the bill in Thai. The waiter looked confused. My wife asked me what I had said to him. She said you have asked him to fill your tank up. Red face. Another one when trying to get a fine lowered after being wheel clamped at 2am on Walking St back in 1987. Yes, I think I must have been one of the first. At the police station I told the desk sergeant that my Thai brother in law was a police colonel. When coming out of the station I realised I had called him a head pineapple. Sopalot no Saluwat. He dropped the fine to Bt300 so he must have been impressed. My brother in law now long retired, is still referred to in the family as Chief Pineapple. 

[freeworld]

13 hours ago, kickstart said:

I first come to Thailand to work along with a small groupmate, few months went by one of my friends and myself were talking, and this subject come up my friend was working in a office ,and was introduced to his work colleges, one girl was called Moi, which he remembered after a few days he said something like where's Moi he got some very odd looks ,after a while he found out why ,moi in the wrong tone  is pubic hair ,and yes he said it in the wrong tone .

My wife and myself use to know a woman called Moi the odd time I have had to name her, I remember this episode.

I have been told they are 9 meanings for the word Khow I said once I am going to Ginn Khow, eat rice /have lunch, then someone said you are going to eat some one's knee, same word different tone.

Did not know this word moi. Pronounced it to my wife and was immediately scolded.

 

Dont dare try and ask for a Banana in Thai, I can never get the pronunciation correct.

[chuang]

Try saying banana in Thai...

[actonion]

At    a in Restaurant in Jomtien beach i ordered  2 fried eggs  on toast   it came on 2  plates,   1 plate had the   eggs on,  the other plate had 2 unbuttered toast & a dollop of jam, i asked why the jam, the lady said all  toast orders come with  jam..!!

[Grusa]

At a small restaurant at Vinmanmek Palace years ago, I tried to order laab moo, which was on the menu. All I got was a blank look. I tried every tone and inflexion......nothing.

Can anyone tell me any Thai word with which "laab" in any tone can be confused, off a menu?

[toofarnorth]

Not sure if it is the Thai language but several years ago my Thai wife and myself stopped to fill up with gasahol and I needed a pee.

There were 3 options for relief.  Ladies on the left , men on the right . In the middle was a wider one and a sign for wheelchairs.

The wife said while pointing to the middle one ' We share '. I said we were not !

[toofarnorth]

14 minutes ago, chuang said:

Try saying banana in Thai...

We have Tree Shrews in the trees over the road from us. Just as well they are not squirels , ask a Thai to say squirel .

[Dirk Z]

13 hours ago, kickstart said:

I first come to Thailand to work along with a small groupmate, few months went by one of my friends and myself were talking, and this subject come up my friend was working in a office ,and was introduced to his work colleges, one girl was called Moi, which he remembered after a few days he said something like where's Moi he got some very odd looks ,after a while he found out why ,moi in the wrong tone  is pubic hair ,and yes he said it in the wrong tone .

My wife and myself use to know a woman called Moi the odd time I have had to name her, I remember this episode.

I have been told they are 9 meanings for the word Khow I said once I am going to Ginn Khow, eat rice /have lunch, then someone said you are going to eat some one's knee, same word different tone.

In Dutch "mooi" means nice or beautiful. The word is very often used, especially when looking at items in a shop or a market. Gives some reactions at times.

[Lacessit]

I remember a Thai woman who, over the dinner table, said she liked eating bulls^!t. Turned out she liked blue cheese.

 

My GF stated she wanted to go to Wat Ching. Where the hell is this Wat, I asked. Eventually I understood she wanted to go home to do the washing.

 

She does now understand the difference between an election and an erection.

[ChrisKC]

Recently, my wife asked me in English:

 

If I do the washing, will you hang yourself?

[bluebluewater]

An "erection" is when Japanese people vote . . . 

[nikmar]

แดด = sunshine

i have difficulty pronouncing certain Thai characters and ด is a problem as it sounds very similar to ต. 

With that in mind i remarked to my Mother in Law that the sun had come out.

 

 

แดดออกแล้ว.

 

Unfortunately , she heard something entirely different.  

 

แตดออกแล้ว

 

which lead to a very shocked mother in law and my wife banishing me from ever using the word "sunshine" in Thai again. Father in law wasnt best pleased either. I even remarked that it was beautiful to see. I still cringe.

[nikmar]

3 hours ago, 2baht said:

   Kee Ma, depending on the tone means either ride a horse or dog $#!t! Be careful!

55. i once told my class that my friend's daughter really really liked riding horses in Thai. I was met with some very strange looks.

[NewGuy]

A while ago, trying out my skills, I asked a waitress if she had sticky rice. “Mi kee niao, mai Khrap?” After getting the blankest stare it clicked. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

[richard_smith237]

11 minutes ago, nikmar said:

55. i once told my class that my friend's daughter really really liked riding horses in Thai. I was met with some very strange looks.

Wife & I returned from the Alps…

Had dinner with the in-laws…

… phone came out with photos & I told them (in Thai) ‘it was beautiful, there’s snow everywhere’…. 

Father in-law was horrified, wife & MiL giggling ! 

 

[brianthainess]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

She does now understand the difference between an election and an erection.

Was it not Yingluck in an interview once on TV who said " I had an Erection"

I remember telling the Thai English teacher at the local school, who with great glee told me the next day that she had had a lot of fun with her students explaining the difference. 

[Keeps]

4 hours ago, 2baht said:

   Kee Ma, depending on the tone means either ride a horse or dog $#!t! Be careful!

There is a soi in Lamai on Samui commonly known as Soi Kee Ma. It's a strip of bars. Before it was paved you had to hop down it foot to foot dodging the dog $#it. I used to look like I was doing some weird tribal dance. Also made checking out the bars/ladies quite difficult as it was constantly eyes on the ground.