Familiarity breeds contempt?

[bob smith]

I've started to notice a pattern emerging.

 

I usually go out to eat and drink quite a lot in various places around Thailand.

Whenever I go somewhere new for the first time they are always all smiles, greeting me and lavishing me with their service.

 

However, I have noticed that once I return to the same establishment and they recognize my face the servers arent nearly as friendly.

Now if i get chatting with them and I have had a few I will sometimes let my guard down and start speaking with them in Thai.

This is when things become critical.

They either warm to this, or as is in the case of the woman the other day - they get offended by it.

 

I am a pretty well dressed guy and I usually dine alone.

So naturally the girls/waitresses want to get to know me a bit more.

sometimes they even sit at my table. they ask questions like ‘how long you stay here?’ ‘you have thai girlfriend?’..

sometimes I give them a cover story, depending on how I gauge the atmosphere in the place (are they scammy, etc)

but other times I let my guard down and tell all.

 

I have definitely noticed a pattern emerging:

The places were I play the dumb farang on holiday welcome me with open arms every time,

the places that know the real me start to become more aloof and even (i think) dislike me after my 4 or 5th visit.

The truth is, I am a wealthy farang who has done good here,

I think many of them don’t like that and are envious of me.

or is it just a classic case of familiarity breeding contempt? 

do I just need to find a new place to eat?

 

This has happened on multiple occasions in different parts of the country.

I decided to start this a while back as kind of a social experiment.

What I found was the dumb farang fresh off the boat gets more respect and better service than the average Thai speaking expat does.

 

Make of that what you will.

 

bob.

Edited March 21 by bob smith

[stoner]

7 minutes ago, bob smith said:

The places were I play the dumb farang on holiday welcome me with open arms every time,

the places that know the real me start to become more aloof and even (i think) dislike me after my 4 or 5th visit.

 

easy target vs knowing the ropes

[Dolf]

Another troll.

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, stoner said:

 

easy target vs knowing the ropes

It’s strange.

 

Because a regular customer over years of frequenting the place will be worth a lot more than a short term one who only visits once.

 

bob.

[bob smith]

3 minutes ago, Dolf said:

Another troll.

No. 

 

it isn’t

 

did you even read it?

 

bob.

[Dolf]

It is just trash Bob. Nobody believes your stories.

[Yagoda]

Maybe they will like you better the second time if you refrain from acting like an entitled jerk the first time.

 

Have you ever considered tht old adage: To know you is to hate you?

[stoner]

2 minutes ago, bob smith said:

It’s strange.

 

Because a regular customer over years of frequenting the place will be worth a lot more than a short term one who only visits once.

 

bob.

 

you are assuming they think that far ahead. today is all that matters. tomorrow i am a beautiful butterfly. 

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, stoner said:

 

you are assuming they think that far ahead. today is all that matters. tomorrow i am a beautiful butterfly. 

indeed, I do assume quite a lot.

 

and I also tend to see the best in people, another flaw of mine.

 

bob.

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, Dolf said:

It is just trash Bob. Nobody believes your stories.

why are you commenting then?

 

bob.

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, Yagoda said:

Maybe they will like you better the second time if you refrain from acting like an entitled jerk the first time.

 

Have you ever considered tht old adage: To know you is to hate you?

how does one act like an entitled jerk by just walking into a restaurant?

 

is it the body language? dress sense?

or can they smell it on me?

 

bob.

[Yagoda]

1 minute ago, bob smith said:

how does one act like an entitled jerk by just walking into a restaurant?

 

is it the body language? dress sense?

or can they smell it on me?

 

bob.

Dont know why they hate you Bobby Boy, but I dont know you and find you to be obnoxious, so Im sure you are worse in person.

[sirineou]

Quote

Familiarity breeds contempt?

Your arguments sound familiar. 

[Dolf]

I've eaten in lots of restaurants. Staff either don't care or just top up your drink and ice.

 

Are you a real person Bob? None of your stories match reality.

[stoner]

12 minutes ago, Dolf said:

Another troll.

 

is it much different than the daily trumping that goes on ? 

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, Dolf said:

I've eaten in lots of restaurants. Staff either don't care or just top up your drink and ice.

 

Are you a real person Bob? None of your stories match reality.

they match my reality quite well, funnily enough.

 

bob.

[2baht]

4 minutes ago, bob smith said:

why are you commenting then?

 

bob.

He's not overly smart, Bob! 

[bob smith]

3 minutes ago, Yagoda said:

Dont know why they hate you Bobby Boy, but I dont know you and find you to be obnoxious, so Im sure you are worse in person.

Ok, thanks for your input mate!

 

bob.

[sirineou]

20 minutes ago, bob smith said:

However, I have noticed that once I return to the same establishment and they recognize my face the servers arent nearly as friendly.

Have you noticed your food tasting a bit different than the same food served to others? 

Special sauce comes to mind  

[worgeordie]

You think too much Bob , things ,made up or not only happen to you,

I have lived here for 36 years and have never come across some of

the stuff you go on about. you must be a very unlikable person  

 

regards worgeordie

[marin]

8 minutes ago, bob smith said:

and I also tend to see the best in people, another flaw of mine.

 

bob.

Then why do you start countless threads putting down the Thai populace in one way or another.

[bob smith]

Just now, worgeordie said:

You think too much Bob , things ,made up or not only happen to you,

I have lived here for 36 years and have never come across some of

the stuff you go on about. you must be a very unlikable person  

 

regards worgeordie

well I suppose that is subjective. when I go out I am a paying customer so I guess there is that. I always tip well if the service is up to standard, but who is the arbiter of service standards? shouldn’t it be the customer?

 

bob.

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, marin said:

Then why do you start countless threads putting down the Thai populace in one way or another.

again, just my honest observations.

 

what can I do if it’s the truth?

 

bob.

[JonnyF]

I found the same thing in restaurants. People will quip that you are just unlikeable and now they know that, but in reality I think they believe you are now a regular and will come back anyway, so better to focus their energy on the new customers and try to make them regulars as well.

 

The opposite of back home where I get far better treatment once they know me as a regular. It's strange, and I find myself trying new places just to get that decent initial level of service again. 

 

Of course, with girls it is better to play the dumb, 2 week millionaire than the "know too mutt" long timer. If they think you're going to leave soon and potentially send them money every month they tend to be very friendly. 

[2baht]

Just now, marin said:

Then why do you start countless threads putting down the Thai populace in one way or another.

Because it's easy! Hang in there Bob, I'm a fan!

[Stocky]

25 minutes ago, bob smith said:

However, I have noticed that once I return to the same establishment and they recognize my face the servers aren't nearly as friendly.

I can empathise with them

[bob smith]

1 minute ago, JonnyF said:

I found the same thing in restaurants. People will quip that you are just unlikeable and now they know that, but in reality I think they believe you are now a regular and will come back anyway, so better to focus their energy on the new customers and try to make them regulars as well.

 

The opposite of back home where I get far better treatment once they know me as a regular. It's strange, and I find myself trying new places just to get that decent initial level of service again. 

 

Of course, with girls it is better to play the dumb, 2 week millionaire than the "know too mutt" long timer. If they think you're going to leave soon and potentially send them money every month they tend to be very friendly. 

finally someone who gets what I am talking about!…

 

cheers mate, you have already brightened up my day!

 

bob.

[Dolf]

7 minutes ago, bob smith said:

they match my reality quite well, funnily enough.

 

bob.

So your claim is staffed are obsessed with farangs. They are either super nice or rude 

 

Your troll stories are terrible.

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, Dolf said:

So your claim is staffed are obsessed with farangs. They are either super nice or rude 

 

Your troll stories are terrible.

let’s hear some of your stories then?

 

bob.

[2baht]

Just now, Dolf said:

Your troll stories are terrible.

Your posts are worse!