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Men's Rules

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  • Popular Post

We nearly always hear 'the rules' from the female perspective. Below are some of the rules from the male side. They are all numbered '1' as I think they are all equally important:

 

1. Breasts are for looking at and that is what we do. Don't try to change that.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down. We like it up, you like it down. You don't hear us complaining that you left it down.

1. Saturday = sports and beer. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Just let it be.

1. Shopping is not a sport. No, we will never think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it and all will become clear.

1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question known to mankind.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A 'headache' that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible during an argument. In fact, all comments we make become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you may be fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know how best to do it, do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during the TV commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. All men only see in 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, we scratch it. It's what we do.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you reply "nothing" we will assume nothing is wrong. We know you are lying but it's just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you do not want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Honestly.

1. Don't ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sex, sport, cars, computers or meat pies.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

 

Anything further to add gents?

 

  • Popular Post

I am sure I read that already somewhere else. Maybe add the source. 

  • Author
2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I am sure I read that already somewhere else. Maybe add the source. 

My mate Dave on a WhatsApp message if that helps? No idea where he got it from. Not claiming it to be an original piece of journalism. 

  • Author
  • Popular Post
2 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

0.5 who cares

Well don't read it then Bignok. Thought I was on your ignore list?

19 hours ago, Keeps said:

We nearly always hear 'the rules' from the female perspective. Below are some of the rules from the male side. They are all numbered '1' as I think they are all equally important:

 

1. Breasts are for looking at and that is what we do. Don't try to change that.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down. We like it up, you like it down. You don't hear us complaining that you left it down.

1. Saturday = sports and beer. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Just let it be.

1. Shopping is not a sport. No, we will never think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it and all will become clear.

1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question known to mankind.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A 'headache' that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible during an argument. In fact, all comments we make become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you may be fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know how best to do it, do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during the TV commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. All men only see in 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, we scratch it. It's what we do.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you reply "nothing" we will assume nothing is wrong. We know you are lying but it's just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you do not want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Honestly.

1. Don't ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sex, sport, cars, computers or meat pies.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

 

Anything further to add gents?

Shopping is very much a sport.  The Sport in question is BIRD watching

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQnDMB1AP_YKCBGArKh3o_pna9Xbbznd4-1sQ&s

image.jpeg.0c1e89182c1b4b5e95f70d18b636059d.jpeg

  • Popular Post

1.  How DARE you post such a thing in this day and age!

 

1.  I like your style. 

Take your time. Give it at least 2-4 years, together ful time, before you propose. Time is ALWAYS our ally, and never theirs. The vast majority of Thai people are way immature for their age. And many women and men are emotionally undeveloped, and really just 13 year olds, who look like adults. So take you time, get to know who they really are. Take as much time as you need. If it's good it's only going to get better, and if there are problems, they are going to manifest themselves over time. 

 

You have NO idea what she's made of, you have no idea how good a job her family did raising her, you have no idea what her underlying neurosis or baggage is, until at least 12- 24 months into the relationship. Together, not online. The longer, the better. That is going to require a lot of pushback on your part, because she's constantly going to be asking to step up the timetable and move things along, so you need to be willing to push back. If she walks, let her walk.

 

Also, see if you like and respect her family. It is far harder to have a successful relationship here if you don't. Most Thais are very bonded to their families. 

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