I thought it would get easier here at older age

[Hummin]

4 minutes ago, Lorry said:

Easy.

Just change your parents.

Be born as a Thai.

(You also need the required bank balance to get respect here, but most farang meet this requirement easily).

 

Or you can stand out and be respectful and make a difference from most foreigners they hear about or seen. 

 

If claim respect, then ,,,

 

Anyway, I do not go to temple, marked, and do not need to show off. Maintain a small group of people, and do not really care about what others think or say about me. 

 

If they do not respect me, they do not respect my wife or her family. 

 

Do I feel respected by Thais? Not at all if generally spoken, but I'm met with respect when I renew my visa, licenses, and everyone I need in my life to live effortlessly in Thailand. 

 

I think the differences comes down to the family you marry in to, and their connections in the village. 

 

 

[Patong2021]

23 minutes ago, saintdomingo said:

The strange thing is this name has been here since 2017 and only posted 4 times, 3 on Thursday 1 on Friday. Probably a logical explanation.

There is a way to do this. I don't think it is allowed for one to explain how.

[unblocktheplanet]

On 6/20/2025 at 1:20 AM, Lorry said:

Try getting the seat for the elderly on the BTS. You don't even get the senior fare,

I do get a senior card on BTS, because I have a pink card. And I often am offered the senior seat, and give it up for someone in more need. Maybe you're not being Thai enough.

[unblocktheplanet]

20 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Anyway, I do not go to temple, marked. Do I feel respected by Thais? Not at all.

The life of any village anywhere is in its market and temple. And they're fun. Going there makes you known as a decent person. That's what respect is.

 

What do you call respect? If you're an elder, do you want to sit at those tables at Songkran so villagers can pour lustral water over yours hands? Or do you want to be the fun guy who throws water with the kids.

 

I try to do both!

[Hummin]

12 minutes ago, unblocktheplanet said:

The life of any village anywhere is in its market and temple. And they're fun. Going there makes you known as a decent person. That's what respect is.

 

What do you call respect? If you're an elder, do you want to sit at those tables at Songkran so villagers can pour lustral water over yours hands? Or do you want to be the fun guy who throws water with the kids.

 

I try to do both!

Oh, I'm done with with those songkran celebrations years ago. Here the family go to temple, and we have a dinner with family, where the elderly gets their respect. I'm not reckoned as elderly neither do I want. 

 

For me and us it is more about sharing responsibility and take care of each other and contribute where we can. Temple or songkran play in the streets is not part of the family celebration. Just old good traditional celebration. Of course the kids on the corners give us water as we pass, and also do their paying respect with the powder when we stop for family and friends of family. 

 

I'm not buddhist so they do not expect me to go to the temple. The temple is a family business so my family always contribute with making food and cleaning up dishes, as well making decorations which they get paid for. 

[Lorry]

41 minutes ago, unblocktheplanet said:

On 6/20/2025 at 1:20 AM, Lorry said:

 

I do get a senior card on BTS, because I have a pink card.

Interesting, I didn't know this. 

You just got it at a station (remember which one?)?

I will try.

[unblocktheplanet]

1 hour ago, Lorry said:

Interesting, I didn't know this. 

You just got it at a station (remember which one?)?

I will try.

I've tried most of them on the Sukhumvit line. Approach with confidence. Only once had I been asked to produce my pink card. Been hassled twice.

 

The first time, at Phrom Pong, I was stupid and gave up my card--B300. NEVER DO THIS! Hang onto your card. I'm quite prepared to hang out until the tourist police arrive. It would be big news if a foreigner were busted for 'theft of services'. Yeah, a night in the hoosegow and a judge laughing this out of court. Would the BTS lawyers even show up? That would 'show them up'!

 

You may not be as much of a radical extremist as I but that's the only way to effect change. After all, the MTR sees no problem.

 

Pick a station outside tourist zones for purchase & top-up. Not Ekamai, Thonglor, Phrom Pong, Asok, Nana, Ploenchit, Chidlom, Siam, maybe Chatuchak. The rest should be fine. Don't give up your card and they will back down.

 

Caveat: you may run into a rulesy BTS employee or someone having a bad day. Or maybe a BTS crackdown. It won't last.

 

 

[Lorry]

3 minutes ago, unblocktheplanet said:

I've tried most of them on the Sukhumvit line. Approach with confidence. Only once had I been asked to produce my pink card. Been hassled twice.

 

The first time, at Phrom Pong, I was stupid and gave up my card--B300. NEVER DO THIS! Hang onto your card. I'm quite prepared to hang out until the tourist police arrive. It would be big news if a foreigner were busted for 'theft of services'. Yeah, a night in the hoosegow and a judge laughing this out of court. Would the BTS lawyers even show up? That would 'show them up'!

 

You may not be as much of a radical extremist as I but that's the only way to effect change. After all, the MTR sees no problem.

 

Pick a station outside tourist zones for purchase & top-up. Not Ekamai, Thonglor, Phrom Pong, Asok, Nana, Ploenchit, Chidlom, Siam, maybe Chatuchak. The rest should be fine. Don't give up your card and they will back down.

 

Caveat: you may run into a rulesy BTS employee or someone having a bad day. Or maybe a BTS crackdown. It won't last.

 

 

Thx, I wil try.

My last trip on the BTS was 107 B, I didn't even know they have that expensive trips.

[roo860]

On 6/20/2025 at 11:34 AM, KhaoHom said:

If I may be so bold.. I wonder how much living in Chiang Mai has to do with it. I've always intensely found the place utterly boring to a fault. Then you have the bad air on top of it. It's a dead city for dead people. No amount of silly motorbike rides in the mountains or whatever will change that. It's not even Thailand's second city although it's often thought of as such. Second City is Phuket or Pattaya.  CM just a wasteland

Chiang Mai is well rid of you then.

[unblocktheplanet]

24 minutes ago, Lorry said:

Thx, I wil try.

My last trip on the BTS was 107 B, I didn't even know they have that expensive trips.

Seniors are half price but only if off-hours 9am-4pm and 8pm to 12am.

[1FinickyOne]

18 hours ago, Lorry said:

No, they are not cheaper than the "Western World", whatever that may mean.

They are cheaper then in the US, but more expensive than non-subsidized prices in Europe. 

You don't know what the Western World means? 

 

I am going to say any of your assumptive knowledge might be suspect... 

[1FinickyOne]

On 6/20/2025 at 1:20 AM, Lorry said:

As you get older,  in the eyes of Thais you resemble more and more not a working professional,  but a typical retiree aka old sex tourist

 

On 6/20/2025 at 1:20 AM, Lorry said:

elder farangs, of course not. Thais do not respect farangs.

Incorrect - very very incorrect

[1FinickyOne]

1 hour ago, Lorry said:

I didn't even know they have that expensive trips.

 

2 hours ago, Lorry said:

Interesting, I didn't know this. 

And the beat goes on... 

[1FinickyOne]

On 6/20/2025 at 1:05 PM, Lorry said:

Farangs don't have any position in Thai society

They do if they are known to help others in times of need... that is 100% - definitely. 

[youreavinalaff]

20 hours ago, Hummin said:

What is bs? Explain with your words your own experiences 

 

 

 

20 hours ago, Lorry said:

Thanks for this elaborate comment.

It really explains things in depth, like your other posts.

Good there are smart posters like you,  they keep this board valuable. 

 

It's the answer your posts deserve. 

 

Respect is a two way thing. It's earned by both parties. I've been in hotels with my wife and received respect from all corners.

 

Same as I've lived in my wife's village and given the locals respect.

 

 

[youreavinalaff]

20 hours ago, Lorry said:

Unfortunately,  I meant generally. 

Even your Isaan girl does not respect you. 

You've clearly failed to get on and are blaming everyone else and assume everyone else is in the same boat.

 

It is plain and clear where the blame lies here.

[Hummin]

10 minutes ago, youreavinalaff said:

 

It's the answer your posts deserve. 

 

Respect is a two way thing. It's earned by both parties. I've been in hotels with my wife and received respect from all corners.

 

Same as I've lived in my wife's village and given the locals respect.

 

 

What you do not understand, at a 5 star hotel, there is not the same as a hotel in Pattaya where you start conversations with your neighbors, in the elevator,  neighbour table or whatever. 

 

Respect is to leave other people alone unless there is a natural binding to start a conversation. 

 

Anyway, with you I believe it is waste of time to explain. 

[youreavinalaff]

Just now, Hummin said:

What you do not understand, at a 5 star hotel, there is not the same as a hotel in Pattaya where you start conversations with your neighbors, in the elevator,  neighbour table or whatever. 

 

Respect is to leave other people alone unless there is a natural binding to start a conversation. 

 

Anyway, with you I believe it is waste of time to explain. 

It's not valid waste of time and I think you'll find my reply was correct. In any hotel I've been in with my wife, we've always been respected. 

 

Your definition of respect is slightly narrow. I would add courtesy and politeness. 

 

I've never been in a hotel in Pattaya with my wife so I wouldn't know about that.

 

 

[Hummin]

32 minutes ago, youreavinalaff said:

It's not valid waste of time and I think you'll find my reply was correct. In any hotel I've been in with my wife, we've always been respected. 

 

Your definition of respect is slightly narrow. I would add courtesy and politeness. 

 

I've never been in a hotel in Pattaya with my wife so I wouldn't know about that.

 

 

Maybe we just talk past each other 

 

We are treated with respect, and we respect others which we should do. But Thailand have a quite hierarchical society where they do not mix with lower status if not out of normal circumstances. 
 

Same as I said you meeting at arenas you sharing interests or through work . 
 

Does that makes more sense

[youreavinalaff]

1 minute ago, Hummin said:

Maybe we just talk past each other 

 

We are treated with respect, and we respect others which we should do. But Thailand have a quite hierarchical society where they do not mix with lower status if not out of normal circumstances. 
 

Same as I said you meeting at arenas you sharing interests or through work . 
 

Does that makes more sense

This thread is about the idea that Farang have no standing in Thai society. 

 

Your post brings in the bigger picture. That is, that Hi-So Thais don't respect those supposedly "lower" than them. Of course this happens. It happens all over the world. 

 

However, it has nothing to do with being a Farang. The poster we both initially replied to has some sort of hang up about Farang and Thai relationships. Probably something he brought upon himself.

[simon43]

On 6/21/2025 at 11:30 AM, youreavinalaff said:

There are beach shorts and regular day to day shorts. There's nothing wrong with wearing the appropriate ones on a day to day basis.

 

No need for a collard shirt either. A  t shirt or a sports vest is also fine to wear.

Try wearing long trousers and a collared shirt and see how you are treated by the locals.  I only wear long trousers and usually wear a collared shirt.  Locals address me as 'ajarn', which is a term of respect, many adults duck as they go pass me out of respect, yet many have never even spoken with me previously.

 

Thai people often form their opinion of you by sight and sound, (as do many other nations, and it perhaps shouldn't be so, but this is the real world).  I've noticed that complete Thai strangers will not address me in broken (or not-so-broken) English, but will immediately speak Thai to me, even if they have never spoken with me before.  They assume from my appearance and dress that I am educated, and can therefore speak Thai 🙂

 

BTW, I am actually a very modest sort of chap, so what I've commented above is not blowing my own trumpet, but simply pointing out that your appearance and manner is very important for Thais to 'allocate' you into the correct layer of the pecking order....

[richard_smith237]

6 minutes ago, simon43 said:

Try wearing long trousers and a collared shirt and see how you are treated by the locals.  I only wear long trousers and usually wear a collared shirt.  Locals address me as 'ajarn', which is a term of respect,

 

They think you are a local language school teacher - Its not high on the totem pole, but above a factory or 7-11 worker.

 

6 minutes ago, simon43 said:

many adults duck as they go pass me out of respect, yet many have never even spoken with me previously.

 

Yes, a sign of respect - they can clearly see you are a lot older.

 

6 minutes ago, simon43 said:

Thai people often form their opinion of you by sight and sound, (as do many other nations, and it perhaps shouldn't be so, but this is the real world). 

 

Very true - Thai's respond to treat each encounter based on its individual merits - those merits contain many facets.

 

6 minutes ago, simon43 said:

I've noticed that complete Thai strangers will not address me in broken (or not-so-broken) English, but will immediately speak Thai to me, even if they have never spoken with me before.  They assume from my appearance and dress that I am educated, and can therefore speak Thai 🙂

 

Because they can't speak any English, especially outside of tourist hubs - its not about their perception of your eduction but about their own.

 

6 minutes ago, simon43 said:

BTW, I am actually a very modest sort of chap, so what I've commented above is not blowing my own trumpet, but simply pointing out that your appearance and manner is very important for Thais to 'allocate' you into the correct layer of the pecking order....

 

'The pecking order' think I think is fairly accurate...  Thai's love to know how other Thai's fit into their 'socio-economic-educational' totem pole...  we are no different, though we remain an enigma as we can mix where they can't... i.e. we can have a beer with a Grab Rider and the same day be having a beer with the CEO of a Major Thai institution etc...    its easier for foreigners to circumnavigate and socio-economic and cultural demographics across the divides of Thai boundaries - where 'we fit in as individuals' will be individually decided...

 

For example: A poor Win-Rider may see us as just another farang, whereas the business owning CEO who's son attends the same school automatically places us on a level socio-economic-educational footing.....

 

Highly variable...  and down to individual situation...  Generalisations are extremely difficult to be made with any reliability. 

 

 

 

[simon43]

3 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

 

They think you are a local language school teacher - Its not high on the totem pole, but above a factory or 7-11 worker.

 

 

Yes, a sign of respect - they can clearly see you are a lot older.

 

 

...

Lol, there are no language schools where I live 🙂 I certainly know that the Thai 'grapevine' circulates information very rapidly, so perhaps these strangers know more about me than I know about me....

 

Certainly there is respect because I am old!

[richard_smith237]

Just now, simon43 said:

Lol, there are no language schools where I live 🙂 I certainly know that the Thai 'grapevine' circulates information very rapidly, so perhaps these strangers know more about me than I know about me....

 

Certainly there is respect because I am old!

 

If its a small area... its very likely they all know everything about you !!!...  There's nothing strong than the local gossips for getting the info out there !!...

 

... So the respect, the nods, the smiles you are getting - are all because you've become a familiar part of the landscape and there indeed exists respect, very likely because you yourself have always acted in a respectful manner to others within the community.

 

 

 

[youreavinalaff]

2 hours ago, simon43 said:

Try wearing long trousers and a collared shirt and see how you are treated by the locals.  I only wear long trousers and usually wear a collared shirt.  Locals address me as 'ajarn', which is a term of respect, many adults duck as they go pass me out of respect, yet many have never even spoken with me previously.

 

Thai people often form their opinion of you by sight and sound, (as do many other nations, and it perhaps shouldn't be so, but this is the real world).  I've noticed that complete Thai strangers will not address me in broken (or not-so-broken) English, but will immediately speak Thai to me, even if they have never spoken with me before.  They assume from my appearance and dress that I am educated, and can therefore speak Thai 🙂

 

BTW, I am actually a very modest sort of chap, so what I've commented above is not blowing my own trumpet, but simply pointing out that your appearance and manner is very important for Thais to 'allocate' you into the correct layer of the pecking order....

I have respect from my neighbour's, family, friends and Thai people in general. Having been a teacher for over 20 years I'm fully aware of the term " Ajarn". However, I've pointed out to people there's no need to call me "Ajarn" or bow their heads as they pass. I'm happy to be on equal terms.

 

I'm not going to start wearing long trousers and a collared shirt in the village or when shopping or generally out and about. I don't need to in an attempt to look important. I'd much rather blend in.

 

I speak good Thai and people who know me know that. When I'm out and about I speak Thai from the off so people know not to be afraid of a language barrier. When I'm in the village I make an effort to try to communicate in Khmer.

[Colabamumbai]

On 6/19/2025 at 10:13 PM, Chinagmaiguy said:

I had always thought the older I got here the more respect I would get. How wrong I was. For 25 years I had my fun, worked for the government and had various professional jobs in Thailand. The older Thai's always get more respect but I seem to get overcharged more and more and overcharged for the simplest things, medical services especially. Sure, you can say I'm cheap and bitter but others I know have noticed the same thing. To the point of not feeling safe. I wonder how long i should stay on here? Ok go ahead with the nasty responses. 

 

I see little respect for us elderly and those who contributed in teaching foreign skills. 

[Wrwest]

On 6/19/2025 at 10:13 PM, Chinagmaiguy said:

I had always thought the older I got here the more respect I would get. How wrong I was. For 25 years I had my fun, worked for the government and had various professional jobs in Thailand. The older Thai's always get more respect but I seem to get overcharged more and more and overcharged for the simplest things, medical services especially. Sure, you can say I'm cheap and bitter but others I know have noticed the same thing. To the point of not feeling safe. I wonder how long i should stay on here? Ok go ahead with the nasty responses. 

 

Approaching 14 years retired here in Chiang Mai. I suppose I am protected from some oversharing due to having a dedicated Thai Wife and Stepdaughter. Ability with a few words in Thai with the smile helps. Recently visiting a Nat'l Park = Thai price for the 3 of us (yes, we all are aware this varies widely).

[Thingamabob]

On 6/20/2025 at 10:44 AM, FritsSikkink said:

What a load of BS.

Had loads of times that Thai people ask me if I want to sit in the BTS.

Me likewise. Now 83 years old, retired to Thailand in 1993. So far, so good.

[Card]

On 6/20/2025 at 10:44 AM, FritsSikkink said:

What a load of BS.

Had loads of times that Thai people ask me if I want to sit in the BTS.

I've lived in bkk 21 years and am now aged 76 and I travel daily on the BTS/mrt. Nobody has ever stood up to let me sit down. 

[Card]

On 6/20/2025 at 10:44 AM, FritsSikkink said:

What a load of BS.

Had loads of times that Thai people ask me if I want to sit in the BTS.

I've lived in bkk 21 years and am now aged 76 and I travel daily on the BTS/mrt. Nobody has ever stood up to let me sit down.