Luk Kreung Mums And Dads

[garro]

I was just wondering how luk kreung children deal with coming from two cultures. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who are bringing up their children in Thailand. How does your child relate to your country/culture? Is he/she proud of having two cultures, or is it an embarrasment? Any tips on how to make it easier for children to deal with being different from their fully-Thai peers?

[mrtoad]

I was just wondering how luk kreung children deal with coming from two cultures. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who are bringing up their children in Thailand. How does your child relate to your country/culture? Is he/she proud of having two cultures, or is it an embarrasment? Any tips on how to make it easier for children to deal with being different from their fully-Thai peers?

Good question, although I can really share any experiences yet as my daughter is only 2 and half, so although we do try to make her aware that she is British as well as Thai, I'm sure the identity thing will more of an issue in a couple of years time.

Looking forward to hearing from those with more experience.

[nidge]

So far my son seems to love it. He's only 11 months old so is blissfully unaware that he is different to all the other kids in the area but the attention he gets from all the women whenever we go out is amazing. They totally ignore all the thai babies when they see a chubby white one and if i had 20 baht for every mobile phone that has a picture of him on it i would be a rich man! If he still gets the attention once he is older i am sure he will continue to love it.

[garro]

So far my son seems to love it. He's only 11 months old so is blissfully unaware that he is different to all the other kids in the area but the attention he gets from all the women whenever we go out is amazing. They totally ignore all the thai babies when they see a chubby white one and if i had 20 baht for every mobile phone that has a picture of him on it i would be a rich man! If he still gets the attention once he is older i am sure he will continue to love it.

Hi Nidge, my son is three months younger than yours and gets the same type of fuss. It can actually become a bit embarrassing. I am not sure though how good this type of attention will be when he hits school. What have other people experienced?

Edited April 24, 2008 by garro

[KhaoNiaw]

When my daughter was little, she was quite proud of her British background - and liked to tell people she was British, not Thai.

As she's grown up (now 15), this has faded. We don't go to the UK very often but the family sometimes visit and we talk on the phone a lot. When she was 13, we sent her over on her own for the summer and she gets on very well with the British side of the family.

So, she's very aware of her British background and would, I think, adjust quite easily to living in the UK. But as a Thai teenager, in a Thai school with Thai friends, and as I'm the only one she uses English with on a daily basis, she now feels Thai. The British part is family, but it doesn't really touch on her daily experience at the moment so it's not a big part of her life.

In terms of her friends and school etc., I would say she's just a Thai kid who happens to have a farang father. People who know her don't treat her any differently and she has never been picked on or bullied because of her background. When we go out shopping etc., she still gets lots of people staring, not just the young guys, and one thing she liked about her last trip to the UK was that nobody gave her any attention like that.

[garro]

When my daughter was little, she was quite proud of her British background - and liked to tell people she was British, not Thai.

As she's grown up (now 15), this has faded. We don't go to the UK very often but the family sometimes visit and we talk on the phone a lot. When she was 13, we sent her over on her own for the summer and she gets on very well with the British side of the family.

So, she's very aware of her British background and would, I think, adjust quite easily to living in the UK. But as a Thai teenager, in a Thai school with Thai friends, and as I'm the only one she uses English with on a daily basis, she now feels Thai. The British part is family, but it doesn't really touch on her daily experience at the moment so it's not a big part of her life.

In terms of her friends and school etc., I would say she's just a Thai kid who happens to have a farang father. People who know her don't treat her any differently and she has never been picked on or bullied because of her background. When we go out shopping etc., she still gets lots of people staring, not just the young guys, and one thing she liked about her last trip to the UK was that nobody gave her any attention like that.

Good to know that your daughter is so well adjusted. Thanks.

[Brigante7]

So far my son seems to love it. He's only 11 months old so is blissfully unaware that he is different to all the other kids in the area but the attention he gets from all the women whenever we go out is amazing. They totally ignore all the thai babies when they see a chubby white one and if i had 20 baht for every mobile phone that has a picture of him on it i would be a rich man! If he still gets the attention once he is older i am sure he will continue to love it.

Hi Nidge, my son is three months younger than yours and gets the same type of fuss. It can actually become a bit embarrassing. I am not sure though how good this type of attention will be when he hits school. What have other people experienced?

Same here, my wife (Thai) & I were in Thailand for a holiday in February with our 4 month old boy and no matter where we went we were always getting stopped by people wanting a photo or just to talk to my wife about our son. I'm 1/2 Scottish & 1/2 Italian and my wife is 3/4 Thai and 1/4 Chinese so there is a hel_l of a mix going on there. My son especialy likes Thai ladies (Along with his dad), they always got a smile and for some reason it always seemed to be Thai ladies around 18 - 30 who liked our son most.

[torrenova]

As my daughter is only 10 1/2 months old she knows nothing of her heritage but I am concious of the fate which mixed kids in Thailand can have if there is no money or the father is permanently absent etc. I won't go so far as to say the Thais do not see the mixed kid as Thai but the mother can come in for some rough treatment and through her the kid suffers.

I've talked to grown up luk kreung kids who didn't have the non Thai father present and some say they had a hard time. Sure they were not from well off families but nevertheless, I think it is an important consideration.

In my home town in the UK we didn't have any non white kids when were growing up except a couple of adopted black children. Farther afield some mixed race kids had it tough I know. I suspect the same could happen in Thailand but as ever, everything would be overlooked if there was cash flowing about.

I wonder how many fathers think about that.

[jumnien]

My 2.8 year old son is very proud of his Thai heritage but has very deep reservations concerning his American backround and the destruction of American values brought on by 8 years of the Bush regime in place. Had he been born in another time he may well have been proud of his American heritage. As it stands now he tells other todlers that he is half-Canadian.

[garro]

Very precocious child you have there sunrise, but you can't fault his reasoning

[PeaceBlondie]

garro, what do you call a kid who's half Irish and half American? The last time I landed at Shannon (which is the name of one of her cousins), Alana was there to greet me, waving both flags! Of course, there is nothing special about blond, curly locks in Ireland.

[garro]

garro, what do you call a kid who's half Irish and half American? The last time I landed at Shannon (which is the name of one of her cousins), Alana was there to greet me, waving both flags! Of course, there is nothing special about blond, curly locks in Ireland.

We normally refer to Irish-Americans as 'Plastic Paddies'.

Asking a child to wave an American flag these days would likely be considered a form of child abuse

[Nibor1945]

Hi Garro.

My 2 children Thai/Brit are now 12 and 5 years old, the youngest seems to be following in her brothers footsteps as regards being Luk Kreung. To start with of course they both attracted more than their fair share of attention, whilst they were under 5 they enjoyed the fuss and attention. At age 7 or thereabouts my son went into denial, he tried to ignore it all and made a point of telling people he was/is Thai. Now at 12 he is trying to find a balance and has become more interested in things non-Thai, at school he likes to be considered (like KhoaNiaw's Child/young lady) as a Thai with a father who happens to be English. I try to avoid comparisons between the different cultures (but fail miserably when I'm behind the steering wheel) and let them find their own balance. When my son is Old/mature enough I'll send him to England for the summer holidays so he can gain some first hand experience of "things foreign" and improve his language skills. They are both Buddhist but my son has attended a Catholic "Bilingual school" so has knowledge of other religions, something else I try to let them find their own way in.

Having "Luk kreung" children is as much a learning curve for parents as it is for the kids so enjoy it and just point them back to the middle path if they veer to far off course.

Regards Nibor.

PS just read through this and found I had not made one mention of my Thai wife! It does help if the wife shares the same outlook on rearing the children, and we both had to "strike a balance" when my son reached his "denial phase". if you're not working in unison then it can get a little more complicated.

Edited May 1, 2008 by Nibor1945

[Thaiboxer]

Our son is only 2 1/2, so perhaps he doesn't notice the difference just yet. We also have a lot of people looking at him and making comments, etc. On the parental side of things, a British coworker of mine has a 6 year old girl who doesn't want her classmates to see her farang daddy. A lot of kids also tease her about being a 'luuk krueng". She considers herself Thai and likes to remind her dad that she's Thai, not British. Perhaps it's just a phase that kids go through.

[Schmeen]

my kids are 10 and 8.

Most of their friends are some sort of mix.

They definately consider themselves Western.

The oldest looks very thai but speaks fantastic English and only average Thai. He eats anything.

The youngest speaks fantastic english but only a small amount of Thai (he won't speak Thai around me so i am unsure of his true ability). He mainly enjoys Western food.

They go to International school, but are registered as Thais to ensure they have to do the required thai studies.

Their nanny speaks no English whatsoever and neither will any others in the future.

Generally they are fine with their mix, it has caused them no issues whatsoever. If we go to live in the UK, it'll be interesting to see how quickly the British Education system can unravel all the good work.

Edited May 5, 2008 by Schmeen

[Ananke]

I was just wondering how luk kreung children deal with coming from two cultures. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who are bringing up their children in Thailand. How does your child relate to your country/culture? Is he/she proud of having two cultures, or is it an embarrasment? Any tips on how to make it easier for children to deal with being different from their fully-Thai peers?

Luk Krung. Half-child. Only half. Incomplete. Not quite belonging. I wish there was a different word in Thai to describe people like us. I am a Luk Krung in my late 30s, born in a time so very different from your children, when such creatures were usually associated with GIs and call girls. Never mind that my Thai mother was a foreign educated executive in a large finance company, or that my Thai grandfather had been a diplomat. Outside the confines of the people who actually knew us, being a Luk Krung child wasn't exactly an easy identity to deal with in status ultra-concious Thailand.

Fortunately, times have changed, and as I understand, it is quite the in thing to be a Luk Krung in Thailand now. But at the end of the day, identity is important to all of us, and belonging is vital to children, so I'm afraid one way or another, your children are going to have a bit of a harder time finding themselves, especially in their adolescent years, than "default identity" people. But don't you fret - most of us get there in the end. There are things you can do, however, to smooth their way a little.

1) Respect the other's culture at all times - or at least make an effort to show that you do. Little ones have big ears! Complaining about Thai people's annoying Thai ways (there'll always be times!) or Farang rudeness or stupidity (really!) for example, may just be venting to you, but for a Luk Krung child, it can really unbalance our identity.

2) As they get older, do make sure they have access to other Luk Krung kids. Shouldn't be a problem in today's Thailand. We don't all need to hang around together - just knowing that we are not the only ones is wonderful. For my brother and I, our world blossomed the day we moved form Thai convent schools (all Thai kids except us) to an international school. As cherished as we were in our old schools, we were no longer the odd balls.

3) At some point, a Luk Krung will try to deny one of his/her identities. And eventually, the other. Maybe even many times before you become a grand parent. Don't let them give up YOUR culture. Stand your ground. Don't give in to this. Honestly. Bad idea. I'll tell you why: the world treats you not as who you are, but as who they see you to be. And for a globe trotting eurasian adolescent (adult, for that matter), that can trigger an identity confusion. Let your child DO any identity they want. But make sure they don't stop BEING half of who they are.

4) Equally accept that part of your chid's soul also belongs to a heritage that is not yours. Know that they are also different form you, and always let them know that that is okay.

5) Teach them that it is an advantage. Teach them always that it is an advantage. This belief, like a spell, will shelter them from bigotry until one day, they will work this our for themselves.

And here's a nice quote form someone who's obviously been there too:

"All my life I had been the bridge spanning the abyss between two worlds. That image has gone. I also mentioned that being from two cultures was like trying to mix oil and water. They don't mix, however hard you try. And therein lay my misunderstanding.

I am not the bridge that spans the two opposites. I am much bigger than that. I am the vessel that contains the whole - both Thai and Scottish, East and West, heart and mind, intellect and emotion, oil and water. And as I picked up my child's water-and-oil souvenir drinking cup, it all became clear: the interesting thing about oil and water is that when you stop trying to force them into one homogeneous mixture with all that shaking, things settle naturally, and what you are left with is something really quite beautiful. "

[garro]

I was just wondering how luk kreung children deal with coming from two cultures. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who are bringing up their children in Thailand. How does your child relate to your country/culture? Is he/she proud of having two cultures, or is it an embarrasment? Any tips on how to make it easier for children to deal with being different from their fully-Thai peers?

Luk Krung. Half-child. Only half. Incomplete. Not quite belonging. I wish there was a different word in Thai to describe people like us. I am a Luk Krung in my late 30s, born in a time so very different from your children, when such creatures were usually associated with GIs and call girls. Never mind that my Thai mother was a foreign educated executive in a large finance company, or that my Thai grandfather had been a diplomat. Outside the confines of the people who actually knew us, being a Luk Krung child wasn't exactly an easy identity to deal with in status ultra-concious Thailand.

Fortunately, times have changed, and as I understand, it is quite the in thing to be a Luk Krung in Thailand now. But at the end of the day, identity is important to all of us, and belonging is vital to children, so I'm afraid one way or another, your children are going to have a bit of a harder time finding themselves, especially in their adolescent years, than "default identity" people. But don't you fret - most of us get there in the end. There are things you can do, however, to smooth their way a little.

1) Respect the other's culture at all times - or at least make an effort to show that you do. Little ones have big ears! Complaining about Thai people's annoying Thai ways (there'll always be times!) or Farang rudeness or stupidity (really!) for example, may just be venting to you, but for a Luk Krung child, it can really unbalance our identity.

2) As they get older, do make sure they have access to other Luk Krung kids. Shouldn't be a problem in today's Thailand. We don't all need to hang around together - just knowing that we are not the only ones is wonderful. For my brother and I, our world blossomed the day we moved form Thai convent schools (all Thai kids except us) to an international school. As cherished as we were in our old schools, we were no longer the odd balls.

3) At some point, a Luk Krung will try to deny one of his/her identities. And eventually, the other. Maybe even many times before you become a grand parent. Don't let them give up YOUR culture. Stand your ground. Don't give in to this. Honestly. Bad idea. I'll tell you why: the world treats you not as who you are, but as who they see you to be. And for a globe trotting eurasian adolescent (adult, for that matter), that can trigger an identity confusion. Let your child DO any identity they want. But make sure they don't stop BEING half of who they are.

4) Equally accept that part of your chid's soul also belongs to a heritage that is not yours. Know that they are also different form you, and always let them know that that is okay.

5) Teach them that it is an advantage. Teach them always that it is an advantage. This belief, like a spell, will shelter them from bigotry until one day, they will work this our for themselves.

And here's a nice quote form someone who's obviously been there too:

"All my life I had been the bridge spanning the abyss between two worlds. That image has gone. I also mentioned that being from two cultures was like trying to mix oil and water. They don't mix, however hard you try. And therein lay my misunderstanding.

I am not the bridge that spans the two opposites. I am much bigger than that. I am the vessel that contains the whole - both Thai and Scottish, East and West, heart and mind, intellect and emotion, oil and water. And as I picked up my child's water-and-oil souvenir drinking cup, it all became clear: the interesting thing about oil and water is that when you stop trying to force them into one homogeneous mixture with all that shaking, things settle naturally, and what you are left with is something really quite beautiful. "

Fantasic post Ananke. I am sure you are a great source of pride for both your parents. I will certainly think carefully about your advice. Thanks

[Nomad97]

I was just wondering how luk kreung children deal with coming from two cultures. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who are bringing up their children in Thailand. How does your child relate to your country/culture? Is he/she proud of having two cultures, or is it an embarrasment? Any tips on how to make it easier for children to deal with being different from their fully-Thai peers?

Luk Krung. Half-child. Only half. Incomplete. Not quite belonging. I wish there was a different word in Thai to describe people like us. I am a Luk Krung in my late 30s, born in a time so very different from your children, when such creatures were usually associated with GIs and call girls. Never mind that my Thai mother was a foreign educated executive in a large finance company, or that my Thai grandfather had been a diplomat. Outside the confines of the people who actually knew us, being a Luk Krung child wasn't exactly an easy identity to deal with in status ultra-concious Thailand.

Fortunately, times have changed, and as I understand, it is quite the in thing to be a Luk Krung in Thailand now. But at the end of the day, identity is important to all of us, and belonging is vital to children, so I'm afraid one way or another, your children are going to have a bit of a harder time finding themselves, especially in their adolescent years, than "default identity" people. But don't you fret - most of us get there in the end. There are things you can do, however, to smooth their way a little.

1) Respect the other's culture at all times - or at least make an effort to show that you do. Little ones have big ears! Complaining about Thai people's annoying Thai ways (there'll always be times!) or Farang rudeness or stupidity (really!) for example, may just be venting to you, but for a Luk Krung child, it can really unbalance our identity.

2) As they get older, do make sure they have access to other Luk Krung kids. Shouldn't be a problem in today's Thailand. We don't all need to hang around together - just knowing that we are not the only ones is wonderful. For my brother and I, our world blossomed the day we moved form Thai convent schools (all Thai kids except us) to an international school. As cherished as we were in our old schools, we were no longer the odd balls.

3) At some point, a Luk Krung will try to deny one of his/her identities. And eventually, the other. Maybe even many times before you become a grand parent. Don't let them give up YOUR culture. Stand your ground. Don't give in to this. Honestly. Bad idea. I'll tell you why: the world treats you not as who you are, but as who they see you to be. And for a globe trotting eurasian adolescent (adult, for that matter), that can trigger an identity confusion. Let your child DO any identity they want. But make sure they don't stop BEING half of who they are.

4) Equally accept that part of your chid's soul also belongs to a heritage that is not yours. Know that they are also different form you, and always let them know that that is okay.

5) Teach them that it is an advantage. Teach them always that it is an advantage. This belief, like a spell, will shelter them from bigotry until one day, they will work this our for themselves.

And here's a nice quote form someone who's obviously been there too:

"All my life I had been the bridge spanning the abyss between two worlds. That image has gone. I also mentioned that being from two cultures was like trying to mix oil and water. They don't mix, however hard you try. And therein lay my misunderstanding.

I am not the bridge that spans the two opposites. I am much bigger than that. I am the vessel that contains the whole - both Thai and Scottish, East and West, heart and mind, intellect and emotion, oil and water. And as I picked up my child's water-and-oil souvenir drinking cup, it all became clear: the interesting thing about oil and water is that when you stop trying to force them into one homogeneous mixture with all that shaking, things settle naturally, and what you are left with is something really quite beautiful. "

Ananke, Thank you very much for your very personal insight into what it is like to be a Luk Krung. As an older English father to a young three year old Thai/British daughter I will heed your inspirational advice for a long time to come. Once again, many, many thanks.

Nomad97

[garro]

Ananke, I was just wondering???

What age were you and your sister when you moved to the international school?

Was it difficult to adjust to the international school?

Was there a big difference in the academic standard?

[Ananke]

Ananke, I was just wondering???

What age were you and your sister when you moved to the international school?

Was it difficult to adjust to the international school?

Was there a big difference in the academic standard?

Grades 3 and 5.

Was it difficult? No, not that I recall. I did miss my old friends, but there were loads of mixed kids like us. That was my most distinct memory. I went to RIS - when it was very small and still in town. Unlike ISB or Pattana, which were the other main choices in those days, it wasn't full of blond children either. Funny the things you find significant as a child.

I don't know about comparing the academic standard ... too young to care at the time. It was certainly differnet. In the Thai system, there was more weight on saving factual input - history, dates, methods, rules, learing by rote. I remember thinking that the international school kids were a bit dim at first. However, in the international system, we were encouraged more to see patterns, think original thoughts, and solve problems by ourselves. For me, I remember that Thai school was harder and harsher and you were pushed more to achieve, and international school gave me the environment to find my own way.

I retain elements of both exposures. Perhaps we accidently ended up with the best of both worlds.

After 10th grade, my brother and I each went to school in the UK to do A levels. That was a much harder change academically. By that age, the difference in the timing of subjects covered in each curriculum is huge. But it wasn't impossible. We were kids; it was a mum-and-dad level decision, and I guess we just got on with it.

[Jungian]

My children are very cautious around foreigners except me, they weren't raised that way but they tend to back away. My baby cries when my foreign friends try to hold her at least until they are around for a few hours and she gets adjusted to them. On the other hand the clerks in the shops (Thai) just scoop her from my arms and play with her no problems or complaints. My older daughter will not speak English to anyone except me unless she knows them for an extended period of time. As far as the mixing of cultures go we take the best parts of the East and the best parts of the West and combine them in our home. We don't raise our children Thai or American we raise them with the best that is available no matter if it is from China, UK, USA or Thailand we expose them to it all. Our goal is to raise Global Citizens not Thais or Americans, culture is great but pride tends to get one in trouble in the world.

[desi]

I retain elements of both exposures. Perhaps we accidently ended up with the best of both worlds.

Ananke, we need more of you on TV.

[scorecard]

I have a twist of this subject.

We adopted our Thai son when he was a teenager, and:

- He's very proud of his Thai heritage, and

- He's very proud to introduce his farang father, and

- He's very proud of his very typical farang surname.

Luckily he is adventurous in everything, one example: he loves to explore different foods, and on his request I've taught him to cook a lot of western dishes. He's also good at cooking Thai food.

From when I first met him, he politely said "please don't speak to me in Thai, I must learn English".

He often brings his university friends home and proudly introduces his father and says "he won't bite you".

He's been asked many questions many times about how he got a farang surname. His answer is "I'm adopted and the story is too long, I'll tell you another time", and he changes the subject. The last part is because he thinks it's our business only.

[dave_boo]

Good information throughout the thread (with the in vogue American bashing aside).

My daughter's all of 15 months, and I'm of the camp that one should find their own path. Thus, irrespective of her mother's proclaimations to others that she's "Amerikaan", she's going to have to decide for herself. Schooling will start in LOS and finish in the States. Hopefully that will be enough for her to hold on to her 'Thai-ness' until she's old enough to decide for herself which path she wants to travel, assuming that she doesn't want or can no straddle both.

It will be interesting none-the-less to witness her journey and hope that the life she chooses is what's best for her.

I grew up around a ton of Hispanic/Caucasian children and they were all well adjusted. We celebrated 4th of July and Cinco de Mayo. There was no snobbery nor fascination, which is remarkable considering I grew up in the Rust Belt (for our non-American members that's the area just south of the Great Lakes--nearly all white, especially in the countryside).

[maccaroni man]

hmm my oldest who is 11 was the child that put his mother and i at odds on more than one occassion mostly relating or because we were worried about his langauge skills and what culture he would identify with. We made an agreement early on that i would only speak english with him and she would only speak thai. As it turned out that was more of an issue than it needed to be, his spoken and written english is beautiful and his thai is ok. He has been in internatioanal schools all but one school yr at age 7 which we all call the year in hel_l, but it was good exposure to over crowded class rooms, mindless disciplin, rigid rules and regulations. The end result of that single school yr in a Thai school was to make him very much more aware of the thai way and much more respectful to his elders i.e. wais all elders immediatly and solidified his self determination that he is an American. His willingness to proclaim himself an american even though he had never gone to america struck a nerve with me as I knew he did not understand what he was so proudly declaring so i took him to the states for a four month journey of the USA. we drove 15,500 miles, saw the west coast the rocky mountains, florida, niagra falls, kansas, mt. rushmore, yellow stone park, seattle wa. friends and family and at the end of the day he understood why he could be proud to call himself an american. since then i have sent him back every summer to visit his cousins which he loves, so how does he view himself? I think he sees himslef as an Amercan with a Thai mother who he is very proud of. The youngest who is 5yrs old is not an issue as we are quite pleased with the way his brother has matured and thus far looks to be following the same path. One note is the only reason they ever call themselves mixed is because some adult tells them so.

[bkkjames]

As a new father (still looks and sounds strange when I write and talk about it) married to a fantastic person (Thai), we have made the decision that our son will grow up here and be very Thai (for better or worse).

However, that being said - I hope to provide him with guidance and learnings from my mistakes which will hopefully instill in him some 'human values = regardless of his nationality or residence'. Meaning, opening a door for ladies, not being afraid to get your hands dirty and earning his own way will be on the priority list.

As a farang, yes there are things that do bother me about certain aspects of local society but I also have to accept that most of these things are cultural norms and will no doubt play a big part in his development. Be that as it may, I will try to bring up my son to show respect to those who have earned it - be it big or small in name or stature. IMO, there's not enough of that around.

Some of my friends thought it strange that we would give our son a Thai first name with the middle and last being western...why not a western first name they said?

My reply (and it was my decision to go the Thai first name route) was simple - he already has a farang name - the last time I checked his mother is Thai and he will grow up in Thailand. I am extremely proud to have a son of Thai Canadian heritage and what better way to celebrate that by giving him a Thai first name.

In the end - time will tell if we have raised him in such a way to be independant - confident - compassionate, I will tell you though, if we fail, it won't be from lack of trying or love.

[billstarbuck]

Our daughter is almost 3, so is a bit young for this thread. Our Thai/American daughter came to Thailand at about 2. We hope to raise her to understand and appreciate both cultures. We gave her a Thai first name and my mother gave her her American middle name. Her Thai name is very unusual, all Thai's have heard it but probably do not know its meaning or origin. We only use her first name even in America. This will root her in Thai culture.

She went to a small daycare in America and now goes to a large daycare in Thailand. They only speak Thai there. Her mother and I only speak English with her to balance her Thai everywhere else (daycare, neighborhood/friends, and family). It seems to be working very well for us. She can speak very well in both languages, although she has a Thai accent, because of her mother.

She is the only mixed child in daycare. The problem is that everybody seems to treat her special, which I don't like. She gets a lot of attention from the adults and children. Overall we think it is the right place for her now. Saturday morning she says I don't want to go to daycare/school. Come Monday, she says "I want to go to daycare/school".

We have looked into putting her in an International School (pre K), but the school in the area doesn't really speak English well with pre K kids. At twenty times the cost, we'll pass. For now she is learning to socialize and speak Thai.

We hope she will always be able to speak Thai and that she can feel at home in Thailand.

We plan to go back to the West when she reaches school age.