Advice Need

[Maizefarmer]

This is not a flame bait and is a true story (some details not affecting storyline have been change for privacy reasons)

i meet this thai girl while she was working as a waitress in my country. i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip, after some time we gotten to know each other better and became friends (over a 1 year period). she was working illegally so she have to make visa runs back to thailand every 1-2 months. we went out a few times and after that became intimate. that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance. This man is always travelling but she would time her waitress job to coincide with when he is in town. she goes back to him every night after finishing her waitress job. she has been with this man for 2 years but insists that she have no feelings for him, from her i know that this rich man have stash many women in many countries and she is only one of them. she does not want to leave him yet but she says she is in love with me. i have not given her a single cent so far. i have even suggested that i will 'pay' her the allowance if she can leave this man. but she told me to give her a year more when she have save up enough money then we will get marry. she is back in thailand now while i am in my own country. i cannot stand this 'arrangement' anymore and would ask if any members have been in a similar situation before with any thai girls. is this the norm?

btw She is an university graduate and was working as a teacher in her province before but found the money too little to get by. She is in her late 20s and i am a chinese singaporean 40 years old. i am no where as rich as her sponsor but i can get by. i think i am in love with this girl as she is with me. how can i break this deadlock?

Run - run like hel_l: once you get to know a person the fact that they are fat or thin becomes a minor issue - its charcter that counts, and in this case if she has the character to shaft him, she has the charcter to shaft you. As to whether or not she does is another story, but for me knowing that she's willing to, is quite enough thank's.

[Travel2003]

My concerns

1) Is she setting me up as future sponsor

2) Will she leave once another 'better' offer comes along

3) Does she have more sponsors that i dun know about

She says that in a year's time she would stop as she would have complete her financial commitments and gotten everything she wants (house, car etc) and saved enough for a small business (to open a restaurant in her province). Should i believe her?

1.yes

2. yes

3.yes

can u see a pattern here?

I agree.

As long as money is involved, and there is no real relationship.

Sponsor or no sponsor, call it what you want, but money change hands, in order to meet frequently.

That is not a relationship I would like to have, if i was single.

When a person already has a so called sponsor, why would he/she not do it again, or with multiple sponsors, or "jump ship" when a better offer comes along?

Most likely he/she would.

Same all over the world.

Stay away from this scenario and hook up with a decent one.

[sassienie]

This is not a flame bait and is a true story (some details not affecting storyline have been change for privacy reasons)

i meet this thai girl while she was working as a waitress in my country. i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip, after some time we gotten to know each other better and became friends (over a 1 year period). she was working illegally so she have to make visa runs back to thailand every 1-2 months. we went out a few times and after that became intimate. that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance. This man is always travelling but she would time her waitress job to coincide with when he is in town. she goes back to him every night after finishing her waitress job. she has been with this man for 2 years but insists that she have no feelings for him, from her i know that this rich man have stash many women in many countries and she is only one of them. she does not want to leave him yet but she says she is in love with me. i have not given her a single cent so far. i have even suggested that i will 'pay' her the allowance if she can leave this man. but she told me to give her a year more when she have save up enough money then we will get marry. she is back in thailand now while i am in my own country. i cannot stand this 'arrangement' anymore and would ask if any members have been in a similar situation before with any thai girls. is this the norm?

btw She is an university graduate and was working as a teacher in her province before but found the money too little to get by. She is in her late 20s and i am a chinese singaporean 40 years old. i am no where as rich as her sponsor but i can get by. i think i am in love with this girl as she is with me. how can i break this deadlock?

She is in her 20s and is trying to build a future for herself.

In fact she is prostituting herself to this 70 year old man for a large amount of money.

For sex and a relationships she prefers someone like the OP, a younger man who she probably does not feel embarrassed to be seen with.

By her actions it appears that this girl has expensive tastes and wont be satisfied by settling down with a partner of no substantial wealth and slowly building up a future together. Money first before love.

The facts are there hitting you in the face, no need to believe what anyone says on Thaivisa.

A fool never takes advice or uses common sense, he only learns by experience.

[Scott]

She's a money grubber and you'd be best to get rid of her.

[somluck]

sorry Dont mean to sound rude..............BUT can`t a 40 yr old man figure out his shit on his own??? Especially your love life....

its pathetic sorry to say....do you expect people to understand your situation better then yourself??

what do you want! how the hel_l is our replies going to help??? What kind of advice are you seeking???

I know Loves stressful, But get a bottle of whiskey and figure this shit on your own!

CHOK DEE....hope it works out

The chinese have a saying that "those from the outside looking in can see much more clearly than the one inside".

I am not exactly a newbie, I have been married and divorced twice, have had a few relationships (including with thai ladies).....been conned a couple of times but by and large luckily most times ended up on top.

i thought she was the perfect girl for me until she told me the truth which threw a spammer in the works. she does not have expensive taste and infact could very well chose not work at the restaurant. I used to give her tips but now she refuses to take any of my money. i did not know that such a demure girl can led such a secret double life.

[somluck]

You are almost 32? BTW, she is fluent in English, speaks and writes better than me does.

oh I thought she's 21, have to back track then,.....and I'm prettty sure my english can be better than yours, if that's one of your requirement

As for the OP, do you think his girl didn't get a gander at his bank account? Probably the 2nd question after what kind of work does he do?

yeah....where is the OP?.....do tell here

She got no chance to look into my bank account at all. She did not ask me how much i make per month though her friends have tried to probe before. i am not a big spender nor a flashy guy, she has been to my house but i have told her that the place was rented from a friend at the discount.

So far from the 3 months we were together i have only bought her 2 gifts (out of my own accord) for valentine's day and her birthday. she has also gotten presents for me. she always jokingly tell me that in future when i marry her in thailand, i have to fork out sinsot of 2 million as i be marrying someone like her who has assets and i be getting half of that.

[Maigo6]

no need to believe what anyone says on Thaivisa.

I live my personal life in accordance with the advice given by the relationship experts on this anonymous website.

I can't thank you guys enough.

[sassienie]

no need to believe what anyone says on Thaivisa.

I live my personal life in accordance with the advice given by the relationship experts on this anonymous website.

I can't thank you guys enough.

Glad to be of service and if you need anymore personal advice, please don`t hesitate to contact me.

Edited March 5, 2009 by sassienie

[somluck]

no need to believe what anyone says on Thaivisa.

I live my personal life in accordance with the advice given by the relationship experts on this anonymous website.

I can't thank you guys enough.

Glad to be of service and if you need anymore personal advice, please don`t hesitate to contact me.

Are you the same person who goes by the same nick in another singaporean based forum?

[teacup]

As for the OP, do you think his girl didn't get a gander at his bank account? Probably the 2nd question after what kind of work does he do?

yeah....where is the OP?.....do tell here

She got no chance to look into my bank account at all. She did not ask me how much i make per month though her friends have tried to probe before. i am not a big spender nor a flashy guy, she has been to my house but i have told her that the place was rented from a friend at the discount.

So far from the 3 months we were together i have only bought her 2 gifts (out of my own accord) for valentine's day and her birthday. she has also gotten presents for me. she always jokingly tell me that in future when i marry her in thailand, i have to fork out sinsot of 2 million as i be marrying someone like her who has assets and i be getting half of that.

I, personally, would stay away from someone who’s putting the price tag on herself and very vocal about it too, in this early stage of a relationship.

Just remember……

Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes…just be only an illusion.

Best of luck

TC

[jackr]

RUN!

[britmaveric]

Unfortunately her not leaving the 70yr old immediately shows what sort of person she is. If it was true love I think you know she would have dumped the old man, and went off with you. Sorry time to move on.

[mrcree007]

My concerns

1) Is she setting me up as future sponsor

2) Will she leave once another 'better' offer comes along

3) Does she have more sponsors that i dun know about

She says that in a year's time she would stop as she would have complete her financial commitments and gotten everything she wants (house, car etc) and saved enough for a small business (to open a restaurant in her province). Should i believe her?

answers; 1) YES

2) YES

3)YES

[Maigo6]

My concerns

1) Is she setting me up as future sponsor

2) Will she leave once another 'better' offer comes along

3) Does she have more sponsors that i dun know about

She says that in a year's time she would stop as she would have complete her financial commitments and gotten everything she wants (house, car etc) and saved enough for a small business (to open a restaurant in her province). Should i believe her?

answers; 1) YES

2) YES

3)YES

Answers

1) No.

2) No.

3) No.

Yes you should believe her, she sounds like a very sensible girl who has a sound business plan, stick with her. To get a house and a car and a business all paid for in her name by other people is nothing short of genius.

Think yourself lucky to be part of her life.

Edited March 6, 2009 by Maigo6

[patklang]

Love can play a big part in some relationships,but if you have a gf/wife in Thailand and want the odd st then always pick a lady who already has a sponsor,less hassle,more rewards.

[teacup]

Love can play a big part in some relationships,but if you have a gf/wife in Thailand and want the odd st then always pick a lady who already has a sponsor,less hassle,more rewards.

oh dear....that's what the OP really needs right now,..... a banana peel speech

[a2396]

My concerns

1) Is she setting me up as future sponsor

2) Will she leave once another 'better' offer comes along

3) Does she have more sponsors that i dun know about

She says that in a year's time she would stop as she would have complete her financial commitments and gotten everything she wants (house, car etc) and saved enough for a small business (to open a restaurant in her province). Should i believe her?

1.yes

2. yes

3.yes

can u see a pattern here?

I agree.

As long as money is involved, and there is no real relationship.

Sponsor or no sponsor, call it what you want, but money change hands, in order to meet frequently.

That is not a relationship I would like to have, if i was single.

When a person already has a so called sponsor, why would he/she not do it again, or with multiple sponsors, or "jump ship" when a better offer comes along?

Most likely he/she would.

Same all over the world.

Stay away from this scenario and hook up with a decent one.

It is difficult, if not impossible, to find a lady not fixated on money here. I hope you live long enough to find a "decent lady", ie one you have to give no money to.

[Travel2003]

My concerns

1) Is she setting me up as future sponsor

2) Will she leave once another 'better' offer comes along

3) Does she have more sponsors that i dun know about

She says that in a year's time she would stop as she would have complete her financial commitments and gotten everything she wants (house, car etc) and saved enough for a small business (to open a restaurant in her province). Should i believe her?

1.yes

2. yes

3.yes

can u see a pattern here?

I agree.

As long as money is involved, and there is no real relationship.

Sponsor or no sponsor, call it what you want, but money change hands, in order to meet frequently.

That is not a relationship I would like to have, if i was single.

When a person already has a so called sponsor, why would he/she not do it again, or with multiple sponsors, or "jump ship" when a better offer comes along?

Most likely he/she would.

Same all over the world.

Stay away from this scenario and hook up with a decent one.

It is difficult, if not impossible, to find a lady not fixated on money here. I hope you live long enough to find a "decent lady", ie one you have to give no money to.

Hi

Not exactly what I meant.

In this situation, yes.

I strongly believe the vast majority of ladies in Thailand are not that fixated on money.

Of course, wealth/money is an important issue in the society, and will always have an important role.

In this situtation, the issue is purely money.

[ozzieovaseas]

If i was you i would be sh_t scared of the day that this girls leaves and falls into your arms.

She obviously is very high maintanence and as time progresses her head will probably swell to the point where she believes that everyone should treat her the same regard.

And if she gets used to the high-life of throwing money around like confetti (A Thai woman MUST have good face,designer label junk,jewellery,new car,condo,ect ect....You will soon be the one signing the cheques when the money runs out.

Actually I cant see many great benefits to you,other than having someone with good looks and good english...All of which you could find from someone who earns her cash in a more of a ...errr.... traditional way!

I would RUN like hel_l myself but before doing so why not have a bit of fun with some good ol "Thainess"..ie "Slyness"...

seeing how you told her your renting ect and havent spent lavishly, i would:

1. Arrange a night to call her.

2. On said night Drink a bottle of scotch.

3. Concoct a good story...maybe you were advised of a good opportunity on a low priced stock, did a day trade,suddenly went south,lost a bundle...and are now in deep shit. ect ect.

4. Drop a few hints about having to get a bridging loan and see how you go.

If she is really on all this allowance AND she is really serious about you then she should swing you a bit of cash right??

THEN take the money and RUN like hel_l!!!

PS. Even if she is getting that much every month i reckon you have bugger all chance on her "Love" coming to your rescue financialy. I would think the old guy is giving her that amount on the occasional months he spends with her and she is using this story to buy more time and freedom to find another permanent cash cow....Maybe if she thought you were cashed up she would be the one saying that she cant go through with the cherade any longer.

AND, IMHO, rich guys are not usually that dumb and easy to do over,otherwise how would they ever get that rich...

Then again we are talking about the power of the P...Y

[mahtin]

Another spaniard in the works: Who paid for her university education?

[JSixpack]

Another spaniard in the works

Loved that book, too, and wish I still had a copy. Seems to be out of print now, however. I'm not paying $50 used.

No doubt it would help the OP retain a sense of humor w/ this shady lady.

Edited March 8, 2009 by JSixpack

[dbrenn]

This is not a flame bait and is a true story (some details not affecting storyline have been change for privacy reasons)

i meet this thai girl while she was working as a waitress in my country. i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip, after some time we gotten to know each other better and became friends (over a 1 year period). she was working illegally so she have to make visa runs back to thailand every 1-2 months. we went out a few times and after that became intimate. that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance. This man is always travelling but she would time her waitress job to coincide with when he is in town. she goes back to him every night after finishing her waitress job. she has been with this man for 2 years but insists that she have no feelings for him, from her i know that this rich man have stash many women in many countries and she is only one of them. she does not want to leave him yet but she says she is in love with me. i have not given her a single cent so far. i have even suggested that i will 'pay' her the allowance if she can leave this man. but she told me to give her a year more when she have save up enough money then we will get marry. she is back in thailand now while i am in my own country. i cannot stand this 'arrangement' anymore and would ask if any members have been in a similar situation before with any thai girls. is this the norm?

btw She is an university graduate and was working as a teacher in her province before but found the money too little to get by. She is in her late 20s and i am a chinese singaporean 40 years old. i am no where as rich as her sponsor but i can get by. i think i am in love with this girl as she is with me. how can i break this deadlock?

1) It's way too complicated

2) She's a disloyal cheat. What makes you think that she won't do the same thing to you and run off with someone else at the drop of a hat?

3) By her own admission, she's a liar. Timing her job and playing the other guy, and probably you, like a Stradivarius. The other guy might be young and built like a bison, for all you know. He might be a psycho, or he might be a really nice bloke who is being duped by this tramp. How can you believe anything that a self-confessed liar tells you?

Run a mile mate, while you still have the chance.

Edited March 8, 2009 by dbrenn

[Pakeha]

that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance.

If she was a waitress in Thailand she would earn about 5000 baht a month. If she was a teacher she would earn 8000 or so (please chime in here experts). So 50000 baht a month from her sponsor - Mate she is sorted! Why would she be working as a waitress illegally? Surely she wouldn't be earning a third of that.

Somethings smells a little fishy.

[dbrenn]

.... i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip...

.... i have not given her a single cent so far...

You are contradicting yourself.

She works in a restaurant on the sly from her sponsor, presumably to meet people like you, who give her big tips. She's clever and, apart from the big tips, won't start taking your money immediately, but the fact that you are giving her big tips has likely put you in her crosshairs as a potential sucker who can be milked later on, along with a whole bunch of others.

Can't wait for the second installment, when she starts going on about sick mothers, needs to buy a new buffalo, house for her granny, how she wants to be a good girl and leave her sponsor (which she will never do as long and he is paying her 50 grand), etc, etc, etc.

Hope your brain has not been too overridden by your nether regions to quit while you can.

You are a troll, right?

[hhgz]

"i...i... i... i... i... is this the norm?"

Yes. Farang men are always falling in love with prostitutes.

[Pakeha]

"i...i... i... i... i... is this the norm?"

Yes. Farang men are always falling in love with prostitutes.

Really? I never have. Nor have any of my friends. Case in point!

[loong]

You may think she was joking about the 2 million sinsod...................

[Beardog]

Maybe I read this post wrong.......the lady is a university grad & works at a resturaunt WHY?

50,000 baht, lets get out the fishing pole & bait it up with some sweet scents to relieve you of your senses. Sounds like she is a master baiter! And her degree is in Using the internet to scam Farangs into using their little brain over the one upstairs. dam_n she must be good to wrangle out 50,000 baht a month .That is a lot of short times with 20 year old chicks....Things that make you go HMMMMMMMMM.

[userabcd]

This is not a flame bait and is a true story (some details not affecting storyline have been change for privacy reasons)

i meet this thai girl while she was working as a waitress in my country. i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip, after some time we gotten to know each other better and became friends (over a 1 year period). she was working illegally so she have to make visa runs back to thailand every 1-2 months. we went out a few times and after that became intimate. that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance. This man is always travelling but she would time her waitress job to coincide with when he is in town. she goes back to him every night after finishing her waitress job. she has been with this man for 2 years but insists that she have no feelings for him, from her i know that this rich man have stash many women in many countries and she is only one of them. she does not want to leave him yet but she says she is in love with me. i have not given her a single cent so far. i have even suggested that i will 'pay' her the allowance if she can leave this man. but she told me to give her a year more when she have save up enough money then we will get marry. she is back in thailand now while i am in my own country. i cannot stand this 'arrangement' anymore and would ask if any members have been in a similar situation before with any thai girls. is this the norm?

btw She is an university graduate and was working as a teacher in her province before but found the money too little to get by. She is in her late 20s and i am a chinese singaporean 40 years old. i am no where as rich as her sponsor but i can get by. i think i am in love with this girl as she is with me. how can i break this deadlock?

[userabcd]

This is not a flame bait and is a true story (some details not affecting storyline have been change for privacy reasons)

i meet this thai girl while she was working as a waitress in my country. i am a regular there at the restaurant and would always leave her a big tip, after some time we gotten to know each other better and became friends (over a 1 year period). she was working illegally so she have to make visa runs back to thailand every 1-2 months. we went out a few times and after that became intimate. that's when she told me that she is been 'sponsored' by a rich 70 year old European man who would give her around 50000 baht per month as allowance. This man is always travelling but she would time her waitress job to coincide with when he is in town. she goes back to him every night after finishing her waitress job. she has been with this man for 2 years but insists that she have no feelings for him, from her i know that this rich man have stash many women in many countries and she is only one of them. she does not want to leave him yet but she says she is in love with me. i have not given her a single cent so far. i have even suggested that i will 'pay' her the allowance if she can leave this man. but she told me to give her a year more when she have save up enough money then we will get marry. she is back in thailand now while i am in my own country. i cannot stand this 'arrangement' anymore and would ask if any members have been in a similar situation before with any thai girls. is this the norm?

btw She is an university graduate and was working as a teacher in her province before but found the money too little to get by. She is in her late 20s and i am a chinese singaporean 40 years old. i am no where as rich as her sponsor but i can get by. i think i am in love with this girl as she is with me. how can i break this deadlock?

Sounds like someone I know and the sponger to be avoided like the plague