Sorry, Men But,

[TonySoprano]

Women do have plenty of important roles here, like anywhere else, but it's silly to think that there is even one non-patriarchal society on the planet.

Yeah, I felt pretty bad recently when a Farang woman with a Thai husband over heard a conversation between myself and another male talking about the possibilities available to Thai and Farang men in Thailand. She felt the need to put me in my place, and let me know that not all Thai men are like that. She was right to do so I guess, as it was not the right place for me and my friend to be discussing this type of stuff, but at the same time, come on, every woman you ask will tell you "Oh, no, my husband is faithful. He's not like the others"... Everyone is in that 1%... in their own minds.

This is a 100% patriarchal society, and way moreso than any Western society.

If these types of possibilites were available as easily in the West, they would be taken of advantage there too.

Edited March 11, 2009 by TonySoprano

[G54]

see what happens,the OP gives the weaker sex a compliment,and what do they reply with................insults.should learn "you can never win an argument with women"

So, in summary, theres some big butch women here with big hairy clusters......sounds about right, no arguments from me

I am not Big and Butch and I dont have Big Hairy Clusters, but i always manage to get things done. I like this thread, its a compliment to all us good Ladies.

It was a compliment but maybe some ladies like to have a go

Common sense tells us that there are times when it is handy to have a fluent speaking Thai about to help with certain problems. How many of you can speak fluent Thai? I can get by with my Thai in a lot of circumstances but the accent does not help

I stand by the impression I have that many Thai men seem subservient when dealing with others.

As for helping myself I do not have a problem doing that, but wading through the quagmire of bureaucracy here can be mind boggling at times. And the 'Next week' attitude that leads to months can be a pain in the ass.

[tuky]

Um, whatever. You've entirely lost me. Quoting a non-existent post by me? By someone else? In a thread I did not participate in?

And just so you know, I do cook and I do take of things for myself, if that is what your point is here, but tbh, I am not entirely sure.

sbk,

I bet if I spent half an hour copying, cutting and photo shopping I could come up with many of said posts...instead I have exposed you as a wannabe Howard Hughes.

For example...

Our discussion HERE....

[patklang]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Seems like you are the one with the problem,so take your balls in your hand and be a man dam_n it.

[GuestHouse]

I was mulling over starting a thread on a similar line.... not that Thai women have the balls that ought to belong to Thai men, rather that for a country which attracts so many foreign men looking for women less 'assertive' than their western sisters Thailand nevertheless seems to be brimming with farangs who are in complete fear of the meek and mild Thai woman they came here to meet.

[permanent_disorder]

Um, whatever. You've entirely lost me. Quoting a non-existent post by me? By someone else? In a thread I did not participate in?

And just so you know, I do cook and I do take of things for myself, if that is what your point is here, but tbh, I am not entirely sure.

it's about the construction of gender roles.

whats the point in slapping the OP for making compliments to thai woman? call him not man enough or send him to language school, because for some problem he got the help of thai women. help with task, he as a male and his male friends to have been not sucessful. this isn't just a language problem, but a thing we as constructed males are just not good enough. thanks god there are females helping us out.

and i am pretty sure that also the OP does a lot things by himself, maybe even cooking or "cleans the house". (with "cleans the house" i try to establish a running gag).

his topic is more or less an reply to the ugly attidude forwards thai woman on this board, phallogocentric misogyny is the mainstream here. and so this thread is related to other topics.

[Super Hans]

Ah yes, thats where I thought this thread was headed.

its a pity that we can't praise one group without denigrating and demeaning another, isn't it?

Erm, you have read the title to this thread, I take it? Does the fact that you - a female - allows this blatant sexism on this forum mean I can open one called "sorry, girls, but you just can't drive as well as men, can you?"?

No? 'Course not. Silly me.

[Boo]

I have deleted some posts. Try to keep it civil folks.

[daoyai]

I think of dealing with paperwork and officials and such to be administrative, secreterial kinds of tasks, nothing wrong with having the woman help out where she can.

[tuky]

I was mulling over starting a thread on a similar line.... not that Thai women have the balls that ought to belong to Thai men, rather that for a country which attracts so many foreign men looking for women less 'assertive' than their western sisters Thailand nevertheless seems to be brimming with farangs who are in complete fear of the meek and mild Thai woman they came here to meet.

I find myself quite pleased that you didn't start a thread in this vain GH. Tonight is one of those nights...

No longer a mod, can no longer edit a few errant thoughts before others noticed .

And tonight I may have a few...errant thoughts, beer and trying to work out the who, why and whatever else...

I guess my disjointed rant cuold be regarded in the sense that women the world over hold a power over us blokes, in some of us it is less than others...

which brings me to my next point, it would be quite interesting to study the iron content of those of us suckers vs the winners

;p

[Boo]

My last post wasn't a suggestion

And it wasn't an invite to discuss moderation either.

The rules on derogatory comments & flaming are quite clear.

[NanLaew]

I heard an academic claiming that the average female says approximately 70,000 words in a day whereas the male utters only around 2,000 words per day.

What was the OP on about again?

[permanent_disorder]

I was mulling over starting a thread on a similar line.... not that Thai women have the balls that ought to belong to Thai men, rather that for a country which attracts so many foreign men looking for women less 'assertive' than their western sisters Thailand nevertheless seems to be brimming with farangs who are in complete fear of the meek and mild Thai woman they came here to meet.

that is my observation too. not only fear of women, also contempt of women. a bitterness as a results of failed relationships with woman, back home and here in thailand again.

why? my theory is that they are actually gays, but just didn't find it out by themself and still want to follow daddy's role model or what they think how a 'real man' has to be.

they prefer to hang around with other grumbling males and bitching about woman. wasted time. they should rather try to have some fun with each other. win -win situation. there is nothing wrong with being gay and probably much more easier to be a 'real man', not all gays are fags (Amer. English). but also cowboys, bikers, working class heros. the acceptance for facial hair is also much more higher in this scene.

[Moonrakers]

Are you trying to come out of the closet Perm_disorder?

[NanLaew]

On that happy thought, do gay men speak more words and lesbians speak less?

[Moonrakers]

On that happy thought, do gay men speak more words and lesbians speak less?

That might depend on whether or not the are working class hero Lesbians, with acceptance for facial hair.

Edited March 11, 2009 by Moonrakers

[G54]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Seems like you are the one with the problem,so take your balls in your hand and be a man dam_n it.

Well, what a sad <deleted> you are. Take your own balls in hand.

[Boo]

^^^lol nanlaew

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I don't really know what to say. I was going to criticize the original poster for suffering from the thing that affects many Western residents in Thailand namely that they relate to Thai women much better than men, gays excepted.

But then some female posters responded with such negativity and downright aggressive and petty comments that I don't know anymore which way to go. Let's just say that overall it's not one of the better topics on this forum.

[Boo]

I was gonna post how it is amazing that when a female poster makes a comment deemed to be out of order by a male poster it has to be made a big issue that a women made it & I was gonna post that it is funny how the same type of agressive posts by male posters are very rarely brought up the same context but then I decided I cant be bothered cause I will probably just be accused of being agressive & rude

[WinnieTheKhwai]

No worries, I make big issues out nasty comments by male posters as well. I call em as I see em.

[mahtin]

phallogocentric misogyny is the mainstream here

How do women reclaim their subjectivity, power and freedom in the postcolonial phallogocentric social symbolic? What are the politics of admittance that confronts the postcolonial woman whose subject position has often been ventriloquised and inscribed from the position of the Other? Moreover, can the 'recovery' of a subject-position also move beyond the essentialising claims of racial, ethnic and gender strictures? More importantly, is 'Woman' a proper name? Is there a proper, essential Truth and identity to 'Woman'? In short, these are some of the challenges that the figure of the subaltern woman raises: the challenge that we dispose ourselves to a feminism of ethics that is an affirmative ethical position toward the wholly other who maintains an absolute singularity (tout autre est tout autre), the challenge of a radical alterity and an undecidability that demands, insists that we move beyond the boundedness of racial, ethnic and gender enclosures.

Who's an onanist, eh?

[Gaccha]

phallogocentric misogyny is the mainstream here

How do women reclaim their subjectivity, power and freedom in the postcolonial phallogocentric social symbolic? What are the politics of admittance that confronts the postcolonial woman whose subject position has often been ventriloquised and inscribed from the position of the Other? Moreover, can the 'recovery' of a subject-position also move beyond the essentialising claims of racial, ethnic and gender strictures? More importantly, is 'Woman' a proper name? Is there a proper, essential Truth and identity to 'Woman'? In short, these are some of the challenges that the figure of the subaltern woman raises: the challenge that we dispose ourselves to a feminism of ethics that is an affirmative ethical position toward the wholly other who maintains an absolute singularity (tout autre est tout autre), the challenge of a radical alterity and an undecidability that demands, insists that we move beyond the boundedness of racial, ethnic and gender enclosures.

Who's an onanist, eh?

If you quote someone you must always provide a citation:

Netto, Priscilla. "Postcolonial Phallogocentrism and the challenge of radical alterity" Paper presented at the annual meeting of the International Studies Association, Le Centre Sheraton Hotel, Montreal, Quebec, Canada, Mar 17, 2004 2009-02-06 <http://www.allacademic.com/meta/p72954_index.html

Schoolboy error.

Any research that seeks to evaluate the above questions in relation to the representational spaces of postcolonial diasporic aesthetics, spaces that moreover exemplify the art of the political that operates in the space of the 'perhaps', spaces that foreground the possibilisation of the impossible, has got to be worth a look.

[mommysboy]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

The thing is guys are in the thick of it most of the time, it's a marathon slog. All very well you turning up doing a token sprint now and then and then wondering what the problem is.

Can't you go back to farangland really, I mean that's half the reason why I came out here!!! to escape

[AndyBlueEyes]

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

(OP's post edited by ABE for brevity)

I couldn't agree with you more G54. When it comes to cleaning the house, doing the laundry, ironing, washing the dishes and all the other menial household duties, women are the best and always seem to get the job done. I would be the first one to admit that I could not live without them ! (tongue in cheek)

[desi]

On that happy thought, do gay men speak more words and lesbians speak less?

yes

(kidding)

[permanent_disorder]

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Seems like you are the one with the problem,so take your balls in your hand and be a man dam_n it.

task: find a way to reach the following goal: someone has to clean the house

select the picture that in your opinion looks like a good strategy to reach that goal:

a)

[lioness]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

Not everyone is the same. My Thai husband can spot a problem almost before it happes, he gets everything sorted in double quick time and helps Farang friends with problems as well.

2 Ex husbands one Aussie and one English both brilliant in their work envionment were totally useless in managing anything not work related and I spent a lot of years runing around after the 2 of them. I feel like I'm in heaven now, having a man who is capable of taking care of his woman and making our lives stressfree.

[senign]

Women do have plenty of important roles here, like anywhere else, but it's silly to think that there is even one non-patriarchal society on the planet.

Ever heard of the Musuo tribe in China or the Khasis in Meghalaya among many others?

These are the only two I visited.

Correction: Visited and understanding local customs!

Some other places I visited, but was too busy finding a hotel, shower, onward transportation, food...........

[Brigante7]

Yet again when confronted with a problem, it is being left to the female gender to assert their authority and get some action.

Far too often I have seen the men here will knuckle their forehead and give it 'Yes, Sir. Three bags full, Sir.' when dealing with staff in offices or shops and other places. But get a woman to go in there and sort the problem and she generally does. It seems the women have the balls round here and the gumption too. The same on the telephone. A man will often come back having agreed to whatever he was told by the person on the other end.

I needed a letter to show my address here - in the end a secretary of the Amphur sorted it.

I needed someone to sort out a problem with the Tourist Police. A woman did that too.

A problem with the house. You guessed, a woman on the phone to sort it and get some action.

Latest problem is with an engineer fobbing off a male friend who called, with lame excuses and has done so for 3 weeks now. I phoned a female and it is being sorted now.

All these and many other problems I've seen over the years that needed someone who can speak Thai and I have tried getting male friends to sort them, but each time they come back with some sad excuse such as, 'Another week.' Not today.' 'No can get.' etc.

Not only for myself either. Living with family in the past, it was always the women who seemed to get the job done, be it a funeral, a house problem or whatever.

Thank heavens for Thai female friends!!

So because your male friends can't get something done for you that means men are useless? Maybe you need to get some friends with a spine.