Current Sinsod Rates

[jomtienbob]

I was just trying to research the going reasonable rates for SinSod and I thought I'd ask the question here just to get a gauge of what people are asking these days.

My story is basically I have lived and worked here 12 years and I have a GF wants to get married but they just started the Sinsod debate through her, but obviously orchestrated by her greedy poor family. My 29YO GF's outlaws want a cool 1m baht plus gold. No she is not a part of the royal family, just a girl from a poor rice farming family in Buriram. But just the same she graduated with a masters from Khonkaen Uni (I think) and has a good job with CP Foods in one of their regional accounting divisions, so there's no question of any BG stuff. She's never been married and is really a top class girl (with obviously a low class family) But Jeez 1m+ baht?

I've obviously pointed out to my GF (Tongue in cheek) that us Australians also have certain traditions where the Bride's parents pay all the wedding costs and that would also apply to the grandiose reception and flying all my (very very many) family and friends from Oz out for the week (business class) and staying at nothing less than the Royal Cliff. But I digress,,, really have things gone so far off into the loony bin here? I don't know any of my farang friends that have paid hefty SinSod and some of them are married into A level HiSo BKK families!! not rice farmers!!.

Does anyone out there have any other current demands so as I can gauge what should be a fair value? I don't mind to contribute but I wont stand for a blatant rip off.

[bkkjames]

I approached this issue a couple year's back different than most.

I convinced the father that marrying his daughter was a financial burden off him and onto me. In less than romantic terms, I was gaining a liability not an asset.

To go this route you must however give them a way out to save face. Therefore I provided the 'show money' on the day that I collected in full at the end of it.

I did paid for everything, wedding, reception, you name it - but I refused to pay for his daughter directly.

[Latindancer]

I believe 100,000 is the going rate for your situation. Though zero can be had too, depending on various factors, such as how much you think you will actualy offend them

Edited February 9, 2010 by Latindancer

[Soutpeel]

Pretty obvious you just havent come off the plane and after 12 years here, you should know the score, THB 1.0mil & gold is taking the proverbial p*ss and you have summed it up nicely the outlaws are driving this one.

Now one could argue if the whole deal is for show in KK and you are getting it back, then no loss, but if the outlaws have it mind they are keeping it then its another ball game, and I personally would be telling them to p*ss off in nice way of course...and tell them to come back with a realistic number...

[slapout]

Slow day at the roo ranch or the extended family in town for a piss up? My offer would be (after the Shela has her doctors' degree) a hot half a million baht and a baht nose ring. I do recommend verification of the prior schooling so as to apply for student loan for advanced degree.

[Tod Daniels]

Incredible as it seems, yet another thread started about sin-sod. The mind truly wobbles. ..

Unfortunately do to my posting penchants; other than the extremely cursory observations I will make, I refuse to get involved with mindless threads.

Perhaps not in your best interest that you posted on Thai Visa about this. It seems all foreign men are married to hi-so, uni-educated, pearly white skinned, thai-nese girls. In that regard you're likely to get some creative and/or marginally informed responses, which may or may not be applicable to your specific situation.

Then again, here's a suggestion; after living here for the last 12 years, why don't you actually go talk to thai men and see what their consensus might be?

For the life of me I don't know why you didn't use a nifty thing called the "Search function" on this website (or even Google for that matter) where you could find and read the posts about sin-sod to your hearts content.. .. I am sure there are HUNDREDS of them lurking around this forum.

One would have thought by now someone would have developed a program where you fill in some variable fields; education, previous marriage, location of birth, number of children, age, etc. and at the end a value in thai baht would be spit out, leaving no room for doubt.

Good Luck in your pursuit of the "current going rate".

Edited February 9, 2010 by tod-daniels

[bkkjames]

Is it just me or do other people think a certain Kiss Fanatic has all of his replies pre-written months in advance.

Today sinsod folder

Tomorrow Thai language folder

[Huey]

Yeah seriously, if your going to pay, just pay what a Thai man would pay for her. No more no less.

[Soutpeel]

One would have thought by now someone would have developed a program where you fill in some variable fields; education, previous marriage, location of birth, number of children, age, etc. and at the end a value in thai baht would be spit out, leaving no room for doubt.

Anybody care to take this one on in Excel ? it could become a pinned topic on TV, and every toursit who comes to Thailand and ends up shacked up with the girl of his dreams could do a quick calculation to see if his intended fits within his current finanical capabilities....

Could also add addtional workbook to determine for the newly married the costs of obtaining visa's for various countries as well as a workbook for the cost of building the outlaws a house in Isaan

surely there is a retired accountant out there who could do the honours, you would be doing farangs everywhere a great service

[mizzi39]

I approached this issue a couple year's back different than most.

I convinced the father that marrying his daughter was a financial burden off him and onto me. In less than romantic terms, I was gaining a liability not an asset.

To go this route you must however give them a way out to save face. Therefore I provided the 'show money' on the day that I collected in full at the end of it.

I did paid for everything, wedding, reception, you name it - but I refused to pay for his daughter directly.

Same here. I paid for the wedding, reception, and all of the other little odds and ends, but did not offer any sin sod. I wrote a bogus check which was used in its place which was ripped up after the wedding. If they insist on it tell them that it goes aginst your culture. If they continue to insist, just go to the amphurs office and marry there. Live at least 100 klm from your outlaws. Believe me 100 klm. is like living in another country. You will never even see them. OK I wrote enough. As TD stated there is enough info. on TV concerning sin sod to fill volumes, so do a search. I'm out!

[chicowoodduck]

Yeah seriously, if your going to pay, just pay what a Thai man would pay for her. No more no less.

My GF's family wanted a cool 3 million, plus the gold, plus the cows, etc., etc. I counterd with zero and have been living happily ever after in the Land of Vertical Smiles!

[Chalky]

Bob,

First of all, congratulations to you and your betrothed.

Many have said before, and I concur because I have done the same, that one should ensure up front that the money will be returned to you after the ceremony for you and your wife's use.

I presume that you have taken for a given that you are paying for the ceremony (ceremonies?) and reception(s) as a separate entity or entities?

This doesn't include the flying in of your family of course!

Another "tradition"is for the bride's family to match what you are putting in, this is the part that may or may not be physically presented to you (a nice touch that keeps the Baht amount down to a realistic level).

I like BkkJames and LatinDancer's responses, these are what I did as diplomatically as I could but, as my partner is the youngest daughter of a large family, "Pop" just replied that he was happy that she was happy (and now we have several rai of rubber trees!).

So I will close by saying that I offered (the smaller of) "all the nines" which has been accepted under the guidelines of the above - 1 Baht less than you recommended LatinDancer! Now we just have to fix a date for my UK family and friends to have enough time to save enough to come over!

Have a great day (or days) Bob.

[Tod Daniels]

Is it just me or do other people think a certain Kiss Fanatic has all of his replies pre-written months in advance.

Today sinsod folder

Tomorrow Thai language folder

Hey easy now; I resemble that remark !!

James; I only ask if you noticed, I stayed firmly on the correct side of the "DO NOT CROSS" line in my post on this thread.

Even I have the capacity to learn; albeit at a much slower pace than most illustrious posters here.

[britmaveric]

Bottle of Sangsom for the father in law should do it. I know that might be far too generous but its the right thing to do.

[richard_smith237]

I have a friend who's expenses are.......

Sin Sod - B400,000 (Wife from Bangkok, a Masters Graduate, Father connected (dept. Prime-Minister and various Politicians attended wedding).

Wedding Costs - B1,400,000 (everything including rings etc)

Envelope money - +/-B1,000,000 (money received from guest's)

He's not sure if he's getting sin-sod back or not (they're still on honeymoon and It's not polite to discuss the return of sin-sod before hand).

The couple have been given 1 Rai of land in Bangkok (est. Value at +/-B15 million).

I think that puts a B1,000,000 request for Sin-sod well into its perspective.... (oh... and the guy is a Westerner).

[jomtienbob]

Incredible as it seems, yet another thread started about sin-sod. The mind truly wobbles. ..

Unfortunately do to my posting penchants; other than the extremely cursory observations I will make, I refuse to get involved with mindless threads.

Perhaps not in your best interest that you posted on Thai Visa about this. It seems all foreign men are married to hi-so, uni-educated, pearly white skinned, thai-nese girls. In that regard you're likely to get some creative and/or marginally informed responses, which may or may not be applicable to your specific situation.

Then again, here's a suggestion; after living here for the last 12 years, why don't you actually go talk to thai men and see what their consensus might be?

For the life of me I don't know why you didn't use a nifty thing called the "Search function" on this website (or even Google for that matter) where you could find and read the posts about sin-sod to your hearts content.. .. I am sure there are HUNDREDS of them lurking around this forum.

One would have thought by now someone would have developed a program where you fill in some variable fields; education, previous marriage, location of birth, number of children, age, etc. and at the end a value in thai baht would be spit out, leaving no room for doubt.

Good Luck in your pursuit of the "current going rate".

If I was able to find any current information I wouldn't have asked the question.

I can be just as much a smart-arse as anyone but I find that to be poor value expenditure of my time or efforts. The current relevance of the question is key because the Thai grape-vine is about all that the uneducated locals go by, and thus the reason asking the question here and not of a Thai man or woman. The ones that do know me would just think "he can easily afford that, why would he ask". The rest I can figure out. This is my GF's 1st experience at all this so her opinion is also moot. I have learned not to pay exorbitant values & markups here and researching the current market in advance is one of the main keys. 1-2 year old information is worthless.

Anyhow thanks to some of the other posters for some feedback. This is our form of grapevine and it does have the potential of being much better and faster than the local's but for a few bitter narcissistic individuals.

[jomtienbob]

I have a friend who's expenses are.......

Sin Sod - B400,000 (Wife from Bangkok, a Masters Graduate, Father connected (dept. Prime-Minister and various Politicians attended wedding).

Wedding Costs - B1,400,000 (everything including rings etc)

Envelope money - +/-B1,000,000 (money received from guest's)

He's not sure if he's getting sin-sod back or not (they're still on honeymoon and It's not polite to discuss the return of sin-sod before hand).

The couple have been given 1 Rai of land in Bangkok (est. Value at +/-B15 million).

I think that puts a B1,000,000 request for Sin-sod well into its perspective.... (oh... and the guy is a Westerner).

Thanks a lot that is interesting.

I will forward this to my GF and that might (only an outside chance) get her thinking a little.

Anyhow it certainly quashes their ask for 1m+

thanks again

[jomtienbob]

Bob,

First of all, congratulations to you and your betrothed.

Many have said before, and I concur because I have done the same, that one should ensure up front that the money will be returned to you after the ceremony for you and your wife's use.

I presume that you have taken for a given that you are paying for the ceremony (ceremonies?) and reception(s) as a separate entity or entities?

This doesn't include the flying in of your family of course!

Another "tradition"is for the bride's family to match what you are putting in, this is the part that may or may not be physically presented to you (a nice touch that keeps the Baht amount down to a realistic level).

I like BkkJames and LatinDancer's responses, these are what I did as diplomatically as I could but, as my partner is the youngest daughter of a large family, "Pop" just replied that he was happy that she was happy (and now we have several rai of rubber trees!).

So I will close by saying that I offered (the smaller of) "all the nines" which has been accepted under the guidelines of the above - 1 Baht less than you recommended LatinDancer! Now we just have to fix a date for my UK family and friends to have enough time to save enough to come over!

Have a great day (or days) Bob.

Thanks for your kind response.

The reference to flying friends and family over was me being sarcastic inasmuch OK I pay 1m+ and you put your hand in the pocket for the expenses which I could easily make into 2-3m if they are paying ;-) but nah, they live on less than 10k a month so the point is frivolity at best.

My GF just said "oh what can I do" she feels trapped and I feel that it is terrible for them to put her in that position. But no I still won't bend over and let em do it to me!! That would be setting a very bad precedent.

Thanks anyhow

[jomtienbob]

I believe 100,000 is the going rate for your situation. Though zero can be had too, depending on various factors, such as how much you think you will actualy offend them

Thanks, I wouldn't blink at that and if anything reasonable under 200k was mentioned I'd not be discussing it here.

I'm not sure if I care if I offend them anymore, but I wouldn't want to do so to my GF, but I suppose that is inexorably linked.

Yes the point is that just the receptions and honeymoon etc will run well past the 1m I guess, so I am also guessing I can see they are very greedy and care not about much else than the money. So common here.

[eurasianthai]

There is no "fair" value for a Sin Sod.

A fair value would probably be no Sin Sod.

[britmaveric]

You need to literally man up and put your foot down. Do not pay a single baht!! If they do not like this idea then you know that their daughter's happiness has no bearing in this situation because its all about dosh. If this becomes a problem then take marriage off of the table and continue as you are.

[jomtienbob]

Yeah seriously, if your going to pay, just pay what a Thai man would pay for her. No more no less.

My GF's family wanted a cool 3 million, plus the gold, plus the cows, etc., etc. I counterd with zero and have been living happily ever after in the Land of Vertical Smiles!

Good point

It could be a 1st Hail-Mary Speculator type bid and not the end they settle on. I put the "I don't pay" card on the table along with the "you already know how generous I am" one to my GF, but she is brainwashed by the family and can't see anything but their avarice.

[GingerLing]

I approached this issue a couple year's back different than most.

I convinced the father that marrying his daughter was a financial burden off him and onto me. In less than romantic terms, I was gaining a liability not an asset.

To go this route you must however give them a way out to save face. Therefore I provided the 'show money' on the day that I collected in full at the end of it.

I did paid for everything, wedding, reception, you name it - but I refused to pay for his daughter directly.

My wife's parents were quite understanding of the situation, that in the UK the bride's family pay for the wedding. So we met in the middle, their family didn't pay for the UK wedding and my family didn't pay a Sin Sod. My wife and I paid for the wedding in Thai and the one in UK.

[Spoonman]

Been with my missus since Feb 08, she came from a Bar and is now 22, no kids and never married (that i know of).

This marriage thing has reared its ugly head, for shitsNgiggles i ask how much for sinsod, she rang her mum and whilst still on the phone told me 300,000B, I fell outta me chair laughing.

A few weeks later the subject came up again, I said not a chance in hel_l will i pay 300k so onto the phone she went, within 5 minutes the $$$$ was down to 40k !!!!

I reckon I can get the figure down to zero... will need some more time though.

[britmaveric]

^used goods, def the amount will be zero.

[geriatrickid]

The test of the farang's self esteem and commonsense is how he responds to the demand for payment. If one is confident of his self worth and not a sucker, he will point out the economic facts: That if the subject of the transaction is to be treated like chattel, then it is only fair that there be an appraisal of value. None of these objects up for sale are worth the asking prize of the sinsod. Would you overpay for a car, a washing machine or a garden hoe? No. So why do it here? Pying the sinsod is the first step to a marriage that will end with a man's crushed dreams, empty bank account and broken heart.

The reality is that the women that are worth paying a sinsod for, don't make unreasonable demands or even expect one, and those that demand a bloated sinsod payment are never worth it. Be a smart shopper.

Maybe it's time for Tesco to offer a sinsod department where silly farangs can go and buy a fresh bride off the shelf.

[Rimmer]

Flaming post deleted, keep it civil please

[mizzi39]

Get a life! You want to pay for a used fanny you deserve what ever you want to be screwed for. How many of these 'Sin Sot' topics do we have to put up with.

Jeezus H Criste You are not compelled to read the postings let alone compelled to be so crass rude and obnoxious about them. You don't have to put up with any of the postings here at all, go somewhere else!

I agree with your response above "jomtienbob" and no one should be flaming you here. Although there is plenty of info on the sinsod issue, I can understand how tedious it can be to sift through to find the answers you are looking for.

It is obvious that you care very much for your wife to be. You may want to think about setting up a meeting with her family. NOT uncles aunts cousins, etc, but mom and dad ONLY!! If you agree to a sinsod then you need to TELL them what is realistically feasible for you. After all you are starting a life with their daughter and her problems become yours and visa versa, financially and otherwise.

I was married here in Issan with a full Issan wedding and writing a check (although bogus) was totally accepable to my inlaws and the 200+ people at our wedding. After all, the sinsod is a face saving issue. If you feel like you are being extorted then this is a seperate issue.

Good luck. Hopefully you will have more constructive posts to help guide you.

[BigWheelMan]

I think this thread should be moved to the scams section.

[BigWheelMan]

The test of the farang's self esteem and commonsense is how he responds to the demand for payment. If one is confident of his self worth and not a sucker, he will point out the economic facts: That if the subject of the transaction is to be treated like chattel, then it is only fair that there be an appraisal of value. None of these objects up for sale are worth the asking prize of the sinsod. Would you overpay for a car, a washing machine or a garden hoe? No. So why do it here? Pying the sinsod is the first step to a marriage that will end with a man's crushed dreams, empty bank account and broken heart.

The reality is that the women that are worth paying a sinsod for, don't make unreasonable demands or even expect one, and those that demand a bloated sinsod payment are never worth it. Be a smart shopper.

Maybe it's time for Tesco to offer a sinsod department where silly farangs can go and buy a fresh bride off the shelf.

Or how about a shop where we can trade in the missis for a new one?

Edited February 9, 2010 by BigWheelMan