My Girlfriends New Tattoo

[eurasianthai]

Maybe some people like to walk around thinking how lucky they are to have an 'individual' at their side in-spite of others discriminatory and narrow-minded looks...

I on the other hand like to walk around thinking how lucky I am to have an individual at my side and simply feel comfortable being dealt with positively and not give others who I come into contact with the opportunity to make a negative judgment.

I'm sure you meant good, but I just did not undersatand it...

Edited April 25, 2010 by eurasianthai

[NADTATIDA1]

It sounds like your expectations are different about what your relationship means. Don't listen to the people lecturing you about owning her. She dissed you. I don't feel a lot of love coming from your post either; that would be the only good reason to keep working on the relationship.

It is her body ok,she is free to do with it what she wants,she is an adult.....by the sounds of it she realises that and doesn't care for narrow minded people like him anyway.

You surprise me Jingthing i thought you was quite open minded and liberal in your thoughts,so if someone upsets you by doing what you don't want.....you would be angry?? this is weird! and controlling.

[rgs2001uk]

Unfortunately society in Thailand is not as socially developed to the levels we would like to believe it has in the West.

People make negative judgements here very quickly, people do judge a book by its cover, especially when regarding mixed couples.

I walk around the shops etc and sometimes see women who when walking around with a Thai fella would look normal, but place them with a Western guy and they look rather slutty....

I think when in Thailand a Thai girl has to dress a little more conservatively if she is walking around with a westerner if she expected to be treated and looked upon respectfully. Absence of tattoo's is part of this dress code in my book.

I'm all for individuality and character, but not at the cost of a woman looking like a hooker in not only in my eyes, but in the eyes of the general society.

So true, once you get out of Pattaya and Bangkok its like taking a step back in time.

Victorian England or Smallsville USA springs to mind, the majority of Thais are very conservative people who will judge as they themselves are judged.

I have heard Thais pass judgement and comment on the height of a girls shoes and length of the skirt worn,

attire usually found in the nightime industry.

Whether you agree with this or not, its just the way it is here.

[sarahsbloke]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper, but maybe fun for a night or two.

Thai society judge ladies with tattoos very harshly, they are not allowed employment with many companies.

The social stigma is too much and most Thais will assume she is/was a hooker.

(Although plenty of Thais assume any girl with a white man is/was a hooker ...... quite often they are right)

If you have good employment in Thailand you wouldn't be able to take such a girl to a workplace event.

Plenty of girls around why get stuck with a silly one?

Edited April 25, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[Jingthing]

It sounds like your expectations are different about what your relationship means. Don't listen to the people lecturing you about owning her. She dissed you. I don't feel a lot of love coming from your post either; that would be the only good reason to keep working on the relationship.

It is her body ok,she is free to do with it what she wants,she is an adult.....by the sounds of it she realises that and doesn't care for narrow minded people like him anyway.

You surprise me Jingthing i thought you was quite open minded and liberal in your thoughts,so if someone upsets you by doing what you don't want.....you would be angry?? this is weird! and controlling.

You totally misunderstand me! I am not talking about me. I am talking about the OP and his reported relationship. He had different expectations than his partner. The partner didn't even bother to TALK about it with him. If you think he is sexist, OK, but it is his right to be that way if that's how he feels, and this woman may just not be a good one for him for his happiness. Hers too, from the sound of it.

Edited April 25, 2010 by Jingthing

[mark45y]

Ditto.

Are you now going to dictate how she dresses, what she eats, and how long her hair should be?

You sound like a not very nice control freak. And I am sure you are giving her grief about this as i write...

Just for your information I like long hair and she has short hair. I like slim women and she is chubby. I have never said anything about it. I don’t tell her what to eat or where to go. Sometimes I suggest she try things. She now likes sharp cheese and Blackthorn cider. Neither cheap here. I cook a lot and she now eats way too much fattening Farang food. I am not very controlling.

I wonder however, Patsycat if you would get something so permanent as a tattoo without discussing it with your significant other?

[eurasianthai]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper.

Come on, staying with somebody does not depend on whether they have a tattoo or not.

Hopefully...

[bangkokrick]

She chooses to be with you......but leads a life of her own too, and makes a few of her own choices.....which you should respect

A tattoo does not make her anything other than a girl who wanted to have a tattoo....she may occasionally be stereotyped, fortunately only by the ignorant

You may be correct. But I think the majority in Thailand over the age of 40 feel the same about big tattoos. The people I work with are mostly over 40 and Thai.

None of this is unknown to her. She knew the problems she would be creating.

I guess it depends on where your priorities lie, your relationship with your girlfriend, or with your work colleagues.........if they can't adjust and respect individualism, within reason.....they have problems of their own making......your girlfriend has created no problem.

When beepers first came out I got one. My wife at the time thought it was cool to beep me 10 times a day. No emergency she just liked doing it. At first I answered the beeps but then I gave the beeper to my assistant and let him deal with my wife. She stopped calling after a few weeks. Then we got a divorce.

Did your wife run away with your assistant?

She had the tattoos when you first met her, so why was it not a problem then?

Cheers, Rick

[Jingthing]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper.

Come on, staying with somebody does not depend on whether they have a tattoo or not.

Hopefully...

Yeah, but failing to talk about an area of conflict (when you know it is a sore point for your partner) before taking action is a very bad sign for a relationship. It shows lack of respect on her part. It would be like if he went out and bought a 4 million baht car without asking her when she had expressed a desire to buy a house.

Edited April 25, 2010 by Jingthing

[473geo]

None of this is unknown to her. She knew the problems she would be creating.

I guess it depends on where your priorities lie, your relationship with your girlfriend, or with your work colleagues.........if they can't adjust and respect individualism, within reason.....they have problems of their own making......your girlfriend has created no problem.

When beepers first came out I got one. My wife at the time thought it was cool to beep me 10 times a day. No emergency she just liked doing it. At first I answered the beeps but then I gave the beeper to my assistant and let him deal with my wife. She stopped calling after a few weeks. Then we got a divorce.

Not sure I've made the leap here with you.........Tattoo........to.......Beeper?

I used to have a beeper......I got rid of the beeper!!!

[mark45y]

It sounds like your expectations are different about what your relationship means. Don't listen to the people lecturing you about owning her. She dissed you. I don't feel a lot of love coming from your post either; that would be the only good reason to keep working on the relationship.

I am not in love with her if that is what you are asking. She does things for me and I do things for her and we normally don’t get on each others nerves. That’s a pretty good relationship in my book.

Is a Thai woman ever in love a Farang? I am not the one to ask. I have had the privilege to be in love a few times. Not looking to do it again. If I was feeling like I was falling in love I think I would run the other way.

Just a calm life. I don’t want to control or change her. The way she was although not perfect was fine by me.

However I agree with the you I think she dissed me.

[StreetCowboy]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper,...

A girl with large gloves is a keeper.

[eurasianthai]

It would be like if he went out and bought a 4 million baht car without asking her

Well, show me a 4 million baht tattoo

[beechguy]

1. The needles that are used are ALWAYS sterile and you are always shown them being taken out of a new air tight packet.

2. What has having a tattoo got to do with working in a bar??........... There are alot of girls, even hi -so girls with tattoos, its called being individual and not following the flock.

If i was her I would be kicking you out for being so petty and small minded about tattooed girls.

Regards

VM

If alot of girls, even hi-so girls are getting tattoos, how is getting one, not following the flock?

[FarAwayBen]

Find a new girl who doesn't have tattoos if that's your preference. As far as looking for respect, remember, the culture is different here, a lot of behavior will come off as disrespectful to a westerner when in fact it's perfectly normal. Lying, for example.

And please, never ever call your Thai girlfriend/wife a prostitute. Plenty of jealous relatives in her hometown have already done that just for being with you so it's a sensitive matter, and it's not an easy thing for her to overcome.

[Jingthing]

Well, if its a relationship without love, probably the best thing to do is give it some time and see how you feel in a month or so. If you are still angry after a long time and/or don't trust her at all anymore, that's probably your answer.

[eurasianthai]

Find a new girl who doesn't have tattoos if that's your preference.

This thread is getting absurd, does anybody choose a partner based on weight, height, tattoos, nationality, whatever?

Pitiful.

[NADTATIDA1]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper,...

A girl with large gloves is a keeper.

or a Boxer!

[StreetCowboy]

I don't feel that a girl with large obvious tattoos is a keeper,...

A girl with large gloves is a keeper.

or a Boxer!

I think the tattoo signifies a boxer rebellion

SC

[centrico]

Yes, it is her body to do with what she wants but when in a relationship of 2 years same as the OP surely you take each others feelings into account? She knows he objects strongly to the tattoo but goes ahead and does it anyway. No discussion as two reasonable adults might have. No compromise reached. A tattoo is not something that can easily be erased so it is not like some fashion accessory you can throw out when you are tired of it.

Individuality is fine if it does not impinge on others in a relationship. Any relationship is about compromise, surely?

If the OP feels so strongly about the female in his life having a tattoo it is up to him to decide if he can live with it or not. That is also an individual choice. Many people dislike tattoos but do we have to slag them off because they do not like them?

[StreetCowboy]

Find a new girl who doesn't have tattoos if that's your preference.

This thread is getting absurd, does anybody choose a partner based on weight, height, tattoos, nationality, whatever?

Pitiful.

I'm looking for an egyptian or lebanese, to complete the set.

SC

[eurasianthai]

strongly about the female in his life having a tattoo it is up to him to decide if he can live with it or not. That is also an individual choice. Many people dislike tattoos but do we have to slag them off because they do not like them?

You mean because a girl has a tattoo, he can't live with her?

Stupid as stupid can be.

Sorry.

[mark45y]

Did your wife run away with your assistant?

She had the tattoos when you first met her, so why was it not a problem then?

Cheers, Rick

The tattoos were a problem for me when we first met. But after knowing her for a while I wrote them off to youthful indiscretion. Her honesty and even temperament were more important. I think her unannounced new tattoo is a statement on her part. A statement that says what I feel and think are not important.

My beeper crazed wife eventually moved the gardener in the house. Yes, she got the house. He beat her up and she had him arrested. They she paid his bail the next morning to get him out of jail and then her son beat him up. I don’t think it was a good relationship. In any event it didn’t take me long to get over it. Both her and the gardener had tattoos. She had a lot of piercing too, I don’t know about the gardener.

[mark45y]

Find a new girl who doesn't have tattoos if that's your preference.

This thread is getting absurd, does anybody choose a partner based on weight, height, tattoos, nationality, whatever?

Pitiful.

A woman chooses a partner based on success, power and those kinds of things. A man chooses a partner based on beauty. This can't be news to you. I don't, of course because I am an enlightened new wave kind of guy!

[Boo]

its her body, if you don't like tattoos then find a women who shares you view but you decided to carry on a relationship with a women who already had body art. Don't be surprised when she chooses to get more.

As for tattoos signifying hookers, umm, we now live in Issan & hubby as a tattooist is doing work on women who have never set foot outside of their own province let alone ever been near a lady bar. Try not to assume or judge too much, thai people aren't cookie cutters of the next & not everyone has the same view on them (outside of the bar trade). The younger thai generations (40 years down) don't view them in the same negative way as some older people may.

[StreetCowboy]

its her body, if you don't like tattoos then find a women who shares you view but you decided to carry on a relationship with a women who already had body art. Don't be surprised when she chooses to get more.

As for tattoos signifying hookers, umm, we now live in Issan & hubby as a tattooist is doing work on women who have never set foot outside of their own province let alone ever been near a lady bar. Try not to assume or judge too much, thai people aren't cookie cutters of the next & not everyone has the same view on them (outside of the bar trade). The younger thai generations (40 years down) don't view them in the same negative way as some older people may.

But you've got to admit - a big tattoo, and the company she keeps - its not exactly calculus to add 2 and 2 together, is it?

I suppose up till now he could pretend she was his daughter...

SC

[safeandsound]

A tattoo on a woman can be very sexy if done right and in the right place, being in the right frame of mind about it obviously helps.

[StreetCowboy]

A tattoo on a woman can be very sexy if done right and in the right place, being in the right frame of mind about it obviously helps.

I reckon its worth about 10%

[Jingthing]

The OP is being honest. He doesn't deserve to be skewered or judged. People have the right to have their own criteria for relationships. Its not a matter of right and wrong; more about compatibility.

Edited April 25, 2010 by Jingthing

[mrtoad]

lol merbyn kernow!

Better than voting for the Jock and English parties that have fuc_ked up the country. Although if you can actually read, the avatar that he has, has nothing to do with Mebyon Kernow.

Edited April 25, 2010 by mrtoad