Raising Baby In Issan

[missThailand]

Ive been sending $500 a month to help raise my baby in issan, been doing this for 4 years ,now my gf wants more as the school years is coming.How much more is a reasonable anount?

[F1fanatic]

How could you be so mean???

At least 1,000 dollars a month is the right amount.

[dumball]

I feel you are already paying more than enough to support a mother with one small child , just perhaps you are supporting the extended family also .

[cardholder]

How could you be so mean???

At least 1,000 dollars a month is the right amount.

I fear F1 that you have not truly accounted for inflation and the strengthening Baht.

The old greenback does not stretch so far these days - I would go for US$ 1,250 per month.

(I presume we are talking United States Dollars and not Liberian Dollars - chai mai ?)

[way2muchcoffee]

Yes. 15,000 bt/month is sufficient for a mother and child to live relatively comfortably in Issan so long as they lived the native lifestyle. But there wouldn't be much left over for extras.

Personally I would want my child to have a bit more in the way of clothes, toys, proper nutrition, games, bicycle, books, be able to go to a movie, a show, an event, a trip, have a computer etc. These things are not really possible on 15,000 bt/month.

Edited September 10, 2010 by way2muchcoffee

[F1fanatic]

Yes. 15,000 bt/month is sufficient for a mother and child to live relatively comfortably in Issan so long as they lived the native lifestyle, but there wouldn't be a much left over for extras. Personally I would want my child to have a bit more in the way of clothes, toys, proper nutrition, games, bicycle, books, be able to go to a movie, a show, an event, a trip, have a computer etc. These things are not really possible on 15,000 bt/month.

We all agree.

I thought 1,000 dollars a month was enough -you've pointed out the error of my way. It should be at least 2.000 dollars a month.

All her friends and family are living on far more and would be horrified if the OP offered less.

[cardholder]

Yes. 15,000 bt/month is sufficient for a mother and child to live relatively comfortably in Issan so long as they lived the native lifestyle, but there wouldn't be a much left over for extras. Personally I would want my child to have a bit more in the way of clothes, toys, proper nutrition, games, bicycle, books, be able to go to a movie, a show, an event, a trip, have a computer etc. These things are not really possible on 15,000 bt/month.

We all agree.

I thought 1,000 dollars a month was enough -you've pointed out the error of my way. It should be at least 2.000 dollars a month.

All her friends and family are living on far more and would be horrified if the OP offered less.

Her sister's probably getting $2,000 per month..........

........ from each of 3 different Falangs

[missThailand]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

[IanForbes]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

10,000 dollars a month? What do you do for a living, rob banks or run illegal drugs? I live quite comfortably on 2,500 dollars a month. There is already a topic on how much people earn in Thailand. Most rural salaries are between 6,000 and 10,000 baht per month... NOT DOLLARS. Rural Thai families seem to exist quite nicely on that amount.

If you need money for the child's clothing and school then I suggest that YOU buy the items needed on your return visit. Understand of course, that no matter HOW much money you send, it will never be enough. The reason being that you would be paying for the entire village to suck off the rich farang. You would be supplying funds for the mother in law's gambling habit and the Thai boyfriend's drinking problem. You can never buy enough beer to supply the whole village.

[way2muchcoffee]

If you need money for the child's clothing and school then I suggest that YOU buy the items needed on your return visit. Understand of course, that no matter HOW much money you send, it will never be enough. The reason being that you would be paying for the entire village to suck off the rich farang. You would be supplying funds for the mother in law's gambling habit and the Thai boyfriend's drinking problem. You can never buy enough beer to supply the whole village.

Mostly good advice. Not very nice to assume that the maternal family are hard drinking gamblers though. It could be true, but it may well not be. Would have been a better post without the extra garbage on the end.

Edited September 10, 2010 by way2muchcoffee

[F1fanatic]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

10,000 dollars a month? What do you do for a living, rob banks or run illegal drugs? I live quite comfortably on 2,500 dollars a month. There is already a topic on how much people earn in Thailand. Most rural salaries are between 6,000 and 10,000 baht per month... NOT DOLLARS. Rural Thai families seem to exist quite nicely on that amount.

If you need money for the child's clothing and school then I suggest that YOU buy the items needed on your return visit. Understand of course, that no matter HOW much money you send, it will never be enough. The reason being that you would be paying for the entire village to suck off the rich farang. You would be supplying funds for the mother in law's gambling habit and the Thai boyfriend's drinking problem. You can never buy enough beer to supply the whole village.

You don't mean that Ian. As your previous posts have pointed out, some Thais just love you for what you are - they're not interested in money at all.

But, the OP should listen - you need on 2,500 dollars a month. My previous post saying 2,000 dollars a month was clearly on the low side. He needs to pay at least 2,500 dollars a month for her to have a decent life.

[JPPR2]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

10,000 dollars a month? What do you do for a living, rob banks or run illegal drugs? I live quite comfortably on 2,500 dollars a month. There is already a topic on how much people earn in Thailand. Most rural salaries are between 6,000 and 10,000 baht per month... NOT DOLLARS. Rural Thai families seem to exist quite nicely on that amount.

If you need money for the child's clothing and school then I suggest that YOU buy the items needed on your return visit. Understand of course, that no matter HOW much money you send, it will never be enough. The reason being that you would be paying for the entire village to suck off the rich farang. You would be supplying funds for the mother in law's gambling habit and the Thai boyfriend's drinking problem. You can never buy enough beer to supply the whole village.

You don't mean that Ian. As your previous posts have pointed out, some Thais just love you for what you are - they're not interested in money at all.

But, the OP should listen - you need on 2,500 dollars a month. My previous post saying 2,000 dollars a month was clearly on the low side. He needs to pay at least 2,500 dollars a month for her to have a decent life.

Pardon my confusion here, but can I get acquire some clarification?

Ian: When you state $2500, are you talking living in the US with $2500 a month or in Thailand($75K baht)?

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht). For comparison I live quite comfortably with my GF within that range and we own a Townhouse, a Car and do whatever we want for the most part, we do not go with out. $2000 to $2500 seems like an awful lot. Now I understand everybody has a different set of needs and expectations but I personally came to Thailand to shed myself of excessive behaviors and waste the US instills in people.

$15,000 Baht a month for support is more then reasonable, in my opinion.

[way2muchcoffee]

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht). For comparison I live quite comfortably with my GF within that range and we own a Townhouse, a Car and do whatever we want for the most part, we do not go with out. $2000 to $2500 seems like an awful lot. Now I understand everybody has a different set of needs and expectations but I personally came to Thailand to shed myself of excessive behaviors and waste the US instills in people.

$15,000 Baht a month for support is more then reasonable, in my opinion.

Are you saying you bought the townhouse and car on only 25,000 bt/month without any extra cash added? It would seem very difficult to do unless you used up some cash from savings you earned in the west.

What about saving for retirement, holidays, a private school for a child? Include saving for a down payment on a house and car or monthly payments. Could you do all this on 25k?

Edited September 10, 2010 by way2muchcoffee

[IanForbes]

You don't mean that Ian. As your previous posts have pointed out, some Thais just love you for what you are - they're not interested in money at all.

But, the OP should listen - you need on 2,500 dollars a month. My previous post saying 2,000 dollars a month was clearly on the low side. He needs to pay at least 2,500 dollars a month for her to have a decent life.

I meant EXACTLY what I wrote, F1fanatic. I understand you are having a bit of a dig at me, but that's okay. I've got thick skin and don't mind a bit of teasing.

There is a HUGE difference between living in rural Thailand (Issan) and living in a posh district of Bangkok or some fancy mooban. If I can live quite nicely on 2500 dollars a month in Canada then some Thai woman in Issan can live quite nicely on 15000 baht... even with a child. She would be lucky to find a job paying that much anywhere in Issan.

However, I also think any farang who gets a woman pregnant in Thailand without intending on living there is also both foolish and irresponsible. Long distance love affairs don't work.

[DP25]

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht).

You don't buy many nights out at Nana Plaza with that

[IanForbes]

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht).

You don't buy many nights out at Nana Plaza with that

True, but I don't think the OP wants his girl friend to do the Nana Plaza scene. There is a HUGE difference between living comfortably in a rural Thai village and being one of the party crowd in a well known bar scene.

[JPPR2]

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht). For comparison I live quite comfortably with my GF within that range and we own a Townhouse, a Car and do whatever we want for the most part, we do not go with out. $2000 to $2500 seems like an awful lot. Now I understand everybody has a different set of needs and expectations but I personally came to Thailand to shed myself of excessive behaviors and waste the US instills in people.

$15,000 Baht a month for support is more then reasonable, in my opinion.

Are you saying you bought the townhouse and car on only 25,000 bt/month without any extra cash added? It would seem very difficult to do unless you used up some cash from savings you earned in the west.

What about saving for retirement, holidays, a private school for a child? Include saving for a down payment on a house and car or monthly payments. Could you do all this on 25k?

Let me explain a bit further but before I do please let me be clear. I do fully respect that everybody has their own level of living expectations. I would never question that as it is clearly a personal preference and not one that I would ever pass judgement.

With that said, I put about 20% down on the town house(Yes Western money). I put 50% down on the car. Now I think we all know that a car is NOT a necessity but a luxury. Public transportation is excellent, whether bus, van, cab or BTS. I was here for 2 years before we bought the car and we only did that as we go to see her parents frequently and the van timing got to be a problem at times. Plus we wanted to take them to dinner or other places after we got there and they do not own a vehicle.

Answering your other comments, we do not want children so that is an easy answer. Obviously location has it's own price tag. We live 15KM north of downtown BKK in a brand new Townhouse development. We bought it 1.5 years back. I finally turned 50( I was waiting so I can now be on the retirement visa). Holidays will be additional expenses but even those are not expensive. We are a modest couple. I moved here to get away from the life style, not bring it with me. We both agree that excessive living costs more but if you curb that you would be surprised how efficient and happy you can live. We have basic creature comforts, Cable, Cell phones, TV's, washer/dryer etc. We shop for sales on clothes. We do not need brand name western style clothes. We have great friends we socialize with and go out with them and travel with them(All Thai). Again I moved from the US as it costs most people $5-$8k USD a month to survive. And I mean Survive!!!. It is simply crazy. After meeting my GF 3 years back at work on transfer activities, it made no sense to stay in the US when I could live a better quality of life.

As for school for children, my future mother in law was a teacher in the public school and recently retired. I taught English for a week to have some fun. Why pay for private education all the time? Sounds like a western need. I can see college but that is way down the road for those deciding to go that route.

But back on target to thread title. As Ian said, I agree to have a child and not live in Thailand is not an ideal decision but not one I made but $500 USD($15K baht a month) is plenty. Most only make a little over half that in a month working. I know this to be factual as I set operations here and it was why the company moved it here.

I hope this response is still somewhat inline with the topic. I do not want to take it off topic

[dumball]

I do not understand some of the posts that want this young lady to live in grand style , they were both as guilty as each other to bring this child into the world , at least the young man is doing his honorable duty to support both the lady and his(?) child , how many Thai men are this honorable ? Living in a village in a family owned house , there is no rent to pay , $500.00 is ample for her to live very well , goodness gracious , she could live quite well in the city for that as many Thai do with a family of three or four , what one neds to think about is that this young man does not live in the country with her and the child . At his present rate of funding he is more likely to keep paying support , raising the ante for no real neccessisty will make him ponder why he has a need to pay anything at all , My wife and I cover ALL of our living needs on $550.00 a month in a nice apartment in the city , surely this young lady has it "Made in the shade " .

[gregchambers]

Actually, to be serious, 100 baht a day is more than enough to cover food and essentials in Isarn. It is vitally important that there is not any kind of surplus to fund the Thia boyfriend etc. Schools and hospitals are almost free for Thai citizens so maybe 10,000 baht on the birthday as a bonus would be about right. A complete waste of time paying more as it will all be raked off by the family/boyfriend.

A lot of farang on here get hysterical because they have been ruined by Western women and taken to the cleaners, and can't take it that some guys in the West have children with Thais and don't get done over.

Having said that, I would put all the money you don't send but could afford to send in a savings account for the child and given it to them when you think they can handle it without getting ripped off by their Thai family (18 or 21?)

This is what I have done for my kids and now that they can think for themselves they are not complaining!

[CWMcMurray]

I agree with others that 15,000 thb a month should be fine for both mother and child.

If I was the OP, I would probably go visit schools with the mother on his next trip to visit his kid in Thailand. With the understanding that he will pay the schools costs.

By going to see the school himself, he can be assured that

1. the school does provide the level of education that he wants for his child

2. The actual costs of tuition, so as not to be "taken advantage of". He may even be able to coordinate with the school to allow him to transfers funds directly to the school if needed.

[dumball]

'gregchambers' timestamp='1284179170' post='3876420']

Actually, to be serious, 100 baht a day is more than enough to cover food and essentials in Isarn. It is vitally important that there is not any kind of surplus to fund the Thia boyfriend etc. Schools and hospitals are almost free for Thai citizens so maybe 10,000 baht on the birthday as a bonus would be about right. A complete waste of time paying more as it will all be raked off by the family/boyfriend.

A lot of farang on here get hysterical because they have been ruined by Western women and taken to the cleaners, and can't take it that some guys in the West have children with Thais and don't get done over.

Having said that, I would put all the money you don't send but could afford to send in a savings account for the child and given it to them when you think they can handle it without getting ripped off by their Thai family (18 or 21?)

This is what I have done for my kids and now that they can think for themselves they are not complaining!

I think that this is the most down to earth post I have read on this thread , it is a reality check for many posters , as the OP said , there is no point to support the lazy , do nothing hangers on(My words) . It is fatal to throw money at poor people who do not understand the true worth of more money than they have likely ever held in thier hands , they will always want more to build 'Face' and unwittingly pass some on to those who desrve not one red cent for doing absolutely nothing to merit it .

[RudieTheFoodie]

Why don't you just pay for a good school (and transport to and from)?

Pay directly to school (tell them to include meals too)

That way you be safe in the knowledge that your kid's at least getting a good education and well fed.

[way2muchcoffee]

I challenge any poster here to live forever with one child (making work nearly impossible) on 15,000 bt/month anywhere. Never a top up, never an incidental, only the 15,000. Possible? Of course. Comfortable? Somewhat. Certainly more comfortable than the lives of many/most people living in rural areas. But I would definitely not call it extravagant. It is not much above subsistence living. Quality of life standards I would demand for my own child require more than this.

Would you raise your own child and live on that only? I seriously doubt it. I don't like the term double standards much, but it is screaming out at me reading some of the posts on this thread.

15,000 is more than enough for the basics, but life isn't about the basics only when a child is in the picture. Other posters have suggested paying tuition for school directly and doing clothes shopping and the like on visits to Thailand. These are good ideas. But if this does not happen, and these additional monies are not provided in one way or other, then I don't believe 15,000 is really enough.

Edited September 11, 2010 by way2muchcoffee

[Eclipse]

As the OP has now left the building He will not be reading these replies.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Nice to leave the topic open though, for this important discussion.

[somtampet]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

FISH SMELL COMING FROM SOMEWHERE,

havent you got better things to do than be silly

[Thakkar]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

You're just imagining things. Of course the boy is yours. Doesn't he call you 'Daddy'? What more proof do you need?

[robbo1]

I make $10,000 a month, an extra $500 may be a budget buster for me. Said child doesnt even look like me, looks like a thai boy, similiar to the look of my gf's brother.

10,000 dollars a month? What do you do for a living, rob banks or run illegal drugs? I live quite comfortably on 2,500 dollars a month. There is already a topic on how much people earn in Thailand. Most rural salaries are between 6,000 and 10,000 baht per month... NOT DOLLARS. Rural Thai families seem to exist quite nicely on that amount.

If you need money for the child's clothing and school then I suggest that YOU buy the items needed on your return visit. Understand of course, that no matter HOW much money you send, it will never be enough. The reason being that you would be paying for the entire village to suck off the rich farang. You would be supplying funds for the mother in law's gambling habit and the Thai boyfriend's drinking problem. You can never buy enough beer to supply the whole village.

You don't mean that Ian. As your previous posts have pointed out, some Thais just love you for what you are - they're not interested in money at all.

But, the OP should listen - you need on 2,500 dollars a month. My previous post saying 2,000 dollars a month was clearly on the low side. He needs to pay at least 2,500 dollars a month for her to have a decent life.

Pardon my confusion here, but can I get acquire some clarification?

Ian: When you state $2500, are you talking living in the US with $2500 a month or in Thailand($75K baht)?

I do not understand how people cannot comfortably live on <$800- $1200USD ( $24k - $36K baht). For comparison I live quite comfortably with my GF within that range and we own a Townhouse, a Car and do whatever we want for the most part, we do not go with out. $2000 to $2500 seems like an awful lot. Now I understand everybody has a different set of needs and expectations but I personally came to Thailand to shed myself of excessive behaviors and waste the US instills in people.

$15,000 Baht a month for support is more then reasonable, in my opinion.

Totally agree 15000 baht plenty for one month

[lovelomsak]

It appears to me after reading most of the posts that most of you guys have no real idea what it costs for a thai to live in Issan. I had an Issan gf during one visit there I was talking to a male relative of hers who works in Bangkok . He has 3 daughters growing up in the village he sends money too. He stated to me he was going to retire there soon on 15000 baht a month in the house he owned and raise his family he said he could live rather good with his wife and 3 daughters on 15000 baht a month. All his rice is free they grow it there. Most of the vegetables are gathered from the area they are free.I think it is 3 or 5 television channels are free. They raise their own chickens . They get fish from the river. It costs an Issan familt virtually nothing a month to live.

My gfs sister who lives next door lives on less then 85,000 baht a year. Her husband and her go to Chiang Rai once a year for a couple of months and work picking fruit or chilis or something and make 70,000 to 85,000 and come home and live on it. Last year they tore down their old house and am buliding a new house. They build the house them selves with help from the family because no one has a job lots of free time. Now every year for next 2 or three years they will take money from the yearly budget to buy building materials.

A woman with 15000 baht amonth in Issan would be the envy of most of the village.

[way2muchcoffee]

It appears to me after reading most of the posts that most of you guys have no real idea what it costs for a thai to live in Issan. I had an Issan gf during one visit there I was talking to a male relative of hers who works in Bangkok . He has 3 daughters growing up in the village he sends money too. He stated to me he was going to retire there soon on 15000 baht a month in the house he owned and raise his family he said he could live rather good with his wife and 3 daughters on 15000 baht a month. All his rice is free they grow it there. Most of the vegetables are gathered from the area they are free.I think it is 3 or 5 television channels are free. They raise their own chickens . They get fish from the river. It costs an Issan familt virtually nothing a month to live.

My gfs sister who lives next door lives on less then 85,000 baht a year. Her husband and her go to Chiang Rai once a year for a couple of months and work picking fruit or chilis or something and make 70,000 to 85,000 and come home and live on it. Last year they tore down their old house and am buliding a new house. They build the house them selves with help from the family because no one has a job lots of free time. Now every year for next 2 or three years they will take money from the yearly budget to buy building materials.

A woman with 15000 baht amonth in Issan would be the envy of most of the village.

1) If they don't have a rice farm they must buy their rice.

2) Large portions of Isaan are bone dry with no vegies available to pick for free for most of the year.

3) Chickens? Maybe one a week for my wife's household in the village. And it is an emaciated little bugger. And this is supposed to feed 5 people?

4) Free fish are available during the rainy season, but what about the rest of the year?

I think you are romanticizing the stark life that most people in Isaan actually live in. They have a leaking roof over their heads. Perhaps extreme flooding in the rainy season. A broken down motorcycle. 3 year old clothes. They do have ample leisure time though.

Some enterprising individuals do very well at 20,000-30,000 bt/month. Can you survive on less? Of course. But can you buy educational toys, new clothes, books, afford an internet connection, a new phone when the old one breaks, decent transportation, air condition in the summer? A new motorcycle that they can actually make the payments on? A decent bed, sofa, bedding, chairs, table? No way. Harsh choices must be made.

Edited September 11, 2010 by way2muchcoffee