Warhammer820 Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 Some extra information for you guys to assist me out. Thing is she lives with her so called bf now and will be finding a job as a retail assistant in farangland. That's her main reason for living with him. To get the financial backings without having to work bar. And I've asked her this- "can you help me out if I have my money runs low?" And she says yes she would once she secured the job. This really puzzled me. Ok I know I'm gonna have to leave her as this is getting crazier everyday. But why answer in that manner. Is she playing reverse psychology with me ??? Again..this is almost a mirror to my original post about my friend.....dude they say some crazy stuff sometimes..i would never trust her..again she could all be saying this to keep you on the hook if she ever needs you..but i am sure her bf does not appreciate her talking to you, and if she does that to him imagine what she would do to you behind your back..it's all about money with this kind of girl..when her bf runs out of money she will move to another one to work him until he is out of money as well..one of the smartest things i have heard was, "You can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl."..you should really talk to farangs who have dated bar girls and see how well their relationship went...i have not heard of a happy story yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 7, 2011 Author Share Posted March 7, 2011 Some extra information for you guys to assist me out. Thing is she lives with her so called bf now and will be finding a job as a retail assistant in farangland. That's her main reason for living with him. To get the financial backings without having to work bar. And I've asked her this- "can you help me out if I have my money runs low?" And she says yes she would once she secured the job. This really puzzled me. Ok I know I'm gonna have to leave her as this is getting crazier everyday. But why answer in that manner. Is she playing reverse psychology with me ??? Again..this is almost a mirror to my original post about my friend.....dude they say some crazy stuff sometimes..i would never trust her..again she could all be saying this to keep you on the hook if she ever needs you..but i am sure her bf does not appreciate her talking to you, and if she does that to him imagine what she would do to you behind your back..it's all about money with this kind of girl..when her bf runs out of money she will move to another one to work him until he is out of money as well..one of the smartest things i have heard was, "You can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl."..you should really talk to farangs who have dated bar girls and see how well their relationship went...i have not heard of a happy story yet I for one did not realise I was going to get myself into a mess like this. I'm not intending to be proud or anything but I was on my way to be onto the dean's list after the first semester but looking at how badly this has affected me in my second semester, I really do hope I would not regret this relationship if I'm not on the list. Well, lesson learnt though not fully yet that a farang will find it a constant uphill struggle to successfully date a thai girl originating from the villages... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdinasia Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 I for one did not realise I was going to get myself into a mess like this. I'm not intending to be proud or anything but I was on my way to be onto the dean's list after the first semester but looking at how badly this has affected me in my second semester, I really do hope I would not regret this relationship if I'm not on the list. Well, lesson learnt though not fully yet that a farang will find it a constant uphill struggle to successfully date a thai girl originating from the villages... That's the right answer! Stereotype every Thai woman that comes from a rural background! (instead of questioning the choices you made and perhaps looking at them?) So far I have seen you manage to post just about every negative stereotype ... based on one example Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 7, 2011 Author Share Posted March 7, 2011 I for one did not realise I was going to get myself into a mess like this. I'm not intending to be proud or anything but I was on my way to be onto the dean's list after the first semester but looking at how badly this has affected me in my second semester, I really do hope I would not regret this relationship if I'm not on the list. Well, lesson learnt though not fully yet that a farang will find it a constant uphill struggle to successfully date a thai girl originating from the villages... That's the right answer! Stereotype every Thai woman that comes from a rural background! (instead of questioning the choices you made and perhaps looking at them?) So far I have seen you manage to post just about every negative stereotype ... based on one example I sense sarcasm. Look, 90% of the BMs here have posted that these thai girls should not be easily trusted as they have a very different background as compared to us farangs. I have nothing against thai girls from the villages. In fact they are the most caring people I've ever met and ever will meet. this is not about stereotyping but about understanding differences between cultures and that it would be an uphill struggle to overcome those differences. To tell the truth I really felt for this girl more than any farang girl I've dated and I still feel for her . She understood me pretty well and we communicated with ease. But its just that she has not done the right thing with me and I hope you do not misunderstand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeystrong Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 I love the bar scene in the LOS. I actually perfer Bar Girls. See my life is a little boring from time to time so the extra drama is just what the doctor ordered for this monkey. I must admit somtimes I have to excuse myself and go to the bathroom so I can have a good laugh without offending my hostess after hearing a big fat lie, But I play along until it's time to move on. Most of the BG I have meet were actually pretty cool, But I think it is important to rember who they are and take that for what it worth and have FUN with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warhammer820 Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 since you are young and taking academics seriously..you could be an investment Some extra information for you guys to assist me out. Thing is she lives with her so called bf now and will be finding a job as a retail assistant in farangland. That's her main reason for living with him. To get the financial backings without having to work bar. And I've asked her this- "can you help me out if I have my money runs low?" And she says yes she would once she secured the job. This really puzzled me. Ok I know I'm gonna have to leave her as this is getting crazier everyday. But why answer in that manner. Is she playing reverse psychology with me ??? Again..this is almost a mirror to my original post about my friend.....dude they say some crazy stuff sometimes..i would never trust her..again she could all be saying this to keep you on the hook if she ever needs you..but i am sure her bf does not appreciate her talking to you, and if she does that to him imagine what she would do to you behind your back..it's all about money with this kind of girl..when her bf runs out of money she will move to another one to work him until he is out of money as well..one of the smartest things i have heard was, "You can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl."..you should really talk to farangs who have dated bar girls and see how well their relationship went...i have not heard of a happy story yet I for one did not realise I was going to get myself into a mess like this. I'm not intending to be proud or anything but I was on my way to be onto the dean's list after the first semester but looking at how badly this has affected me in my second semester, I really do hope I would not regret this relationship if I'm not on the list. Well, lesson learnt though not fully yet that a farang will find it a constant uphill struggle to successfully date a thai girl originating from the villages... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warhammer820 Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 (edited) there are many more examples...not just his alone..not all village girls are bad, but there is a fair amount that work in bars I for one did not realise I was going to get myself into a mess like this. I'm not intending to be proud or anything but I was on my way to be onto the dean's list after the first semester but looking at how badly this has affected me in my second semester, I really do hope I would not regret this relationship if I'm not on the list. Well, lesson learnt though not fully yet that a farang will find it a constant uphill struggle to successfully date a thai girl originating from the villages... That's the right answer! Stereotype every Thai woman that comes from a rural background! (instead of questioning the choices you made and perhaps looking at them?) So far I have seen you manage to post just about every negative stereotype ... based on one example Edited March 7, 2011 by Warhammer820 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAJIC Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 I'm actually just feelin bad to leave her after all we've talked about and also the fact that I've bonded with her family. Its just so hard on me and its affecting my studies now knowing she is shagging another everyday. Mate, believe me, i have met this profile of Thai female over and over and over here, and they dont have to be bargirls to act in this way either. A few ive met who were seemingly "normal" (if thats possible) have acted even worse. They have absolutely no idea about "love" as we know it, they just simply don't understand such a thing, and their only thought is survival and survival=money, your money, and they will do ANYTHING to get it the easy way. They are basically selfish, cold and calcualting, VERY manipulative, good actors, and have absolutely no morals or qualms in telling lies 24/7 . Its a sad thing that they believe they have to be like this in order to survive but you will never change them...they are what they are, they will NEVER change. Do yourself a favour and and just forget her...The worst thing you could do is try to work her out, make any sense of it all, or twist yourself in pondering over why she does this and that. You will only suceed in doing your own head in. It may be a bit tough for a while, you may feel a bit lonely and face a wide range of emotions daily but believe this>>>you will come out the other side SANE, a lot happier, and with a LOT more cash in your pocket. In time you will come to see it like it is and appreciate Thailand for what it is and what you can do here. There are ways to get whatever it is you want (within reason!) it WON'T cost you a bucket and you WON'T be driven insane on a daily basis. Good luck with it!! Recommended reading for "fanfanfan" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 7, 2011 Author Share Posted March 7, 2011 Warhammer could not be more spot on. I am nothing more than an investment. Even she has told me that directly! "I want u in the future because I think u the person who can truly understand,can have have a good relationship with me and help me in the future" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GizmoBKK Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 Some extra information for you guys to assist me out. Thing is she lives with her so called bf now and will be finding a job as a retail assistant in farangland. That's her main reason for living with him. To get the financial backings without having to work bar. And again, the seniors on this forum will predict how the story will go: she will come to "farangland" (wherever this is). She will realize that this country is different form Thailand: here friends and family (both very important for most Thai girls) are not around. If there is not a big Thai community, she will feel lonely and bored. She will suddenly realize that an Euro or USD is woth less in its home country compared to its value in Thailand. And she probably will not be able to find a job (if she tries to find one at all) because of her very limited language skills. In other words: reality will hit her hard. I would estimate the average time before splitting up with the bf and being back to the bar scene is about 3 months. Yes, once more a lot of stereo-typing, but I see a lot of people with a grin on their face and nodding while reading this post. And I've asked her this- "can you help me out if I have my money runs low?" And she says yes she would once she secured the job. This really puzzled me. Ok I know I'm gonna have to leave her as this is getting crazier everyday. But why answer in that manner. Is she playing reverse psychology with me ??? She does not necessarily play reverse psychology. She might be so naive to really believe this. She might indeed help you out one day if she had all that money she is dreaming of. Try it out. Get broke and see with how much money she will support you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GizmoBKK Posted March 7, 2011 Share Posted March 7, 2011 Hi Gizmo. Thanks for the advice so far. Your post suggests u too have thought long about this issue. Thing is, I've always found it noble for thai girls as such to want to get money for their family at all costs although I find it extremely wrong at the means they are doing so. She is slated to travel to farangland this weekend to visit me for 5 days. I'm thinking of a way to let her go then Really, she is going to visit you at home for 5 days? She's just flying over to visit you or she combines it with visiting her bf? (How would you actually feel if you were this bf?) And who has paid for the flight? And how are you going to spend 5 long days together after all this story? Excuse my curiosity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 8, 2011 Author Share Posted March 8, 2011 Hi Gizmo. Thanks for the advice so far. Your post suggests u too have thought long about this issue. Thing is, I've always found it noble for thai girls as such to want to get money for their family at all costs although I find it extremely wrong at the means they are doing so. She is slated to travel to farangland this weekend to visit me for 5 days. I'm thinking of a way to let her go then Really, she is going to visit you at home for 5 days? She's just flying over to visit you or she combines it with visiting her bf? (How would you actually feel if you were this bf?) And who has paid for the flight? And how are you going to spend 5 long days together after all this story? Excuse my curiosity. She is in los now n will just be comin here for 5 days because she needs to return to farangland again next weekend. Man, I don't know how am I gonna be with her after knowing the 'whole' story. I know I have to brealk it down with her during her time here but I just don't know how. Its not the same situation with girls here. And she's paying for her flight whilst I have booked accomodation..I feel really dumb now to be honest.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GizmoBKK Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 She is in los now n will just be comin here for 5 days because she needs to return to farangland again next weekend. Man, I don't know how am I gonna be with her after knowing the 'whole' story. I know I have to brealk it down with her during her time here but I just don't know how. Its not the same situation with girls here. And she's paying for her flight whilst I have booked accomodation..I feel really dumb now to be honest.. Well, you need to decide what suits YOU best. Some ideas to ponder: Why do you "have to break it down during her time here"? Are there any other options? If you are sure you want to break up anyway, what about canceling the flight and saving some money on both ends? How comfortable would you feel playing the game that the bar girls would play in such a situation: turn off the brain (and the heart) and just have a great time together and the rest - time will tell... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ableguy Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 I'll go out on a limb here... You are probably young, but without much hope of her converting you into a paycheque... He is old(er) and has a high likelyhood of being converted into a paycheque... She has no need to cut you loose completely... in a few years, her English Boyfriend might dump her arse, or she might have been with him long enough that she can screw money out of him when she leaves... The cost to her of keeping you on the hook is some time on the phone, and a few crocodile tears... Forget the bullshit about her needing to support her family... she is just lazy, and marrying a farang is the easiest way for her not to need to get a real job... If it was about the family there are a billion jobs that she could do, give them some money, and stay with you... Move on, find another one... send her a photo... hope you don't get screwed around by the new model... I only just read the last line of your post where you say she is a bargirl.... I've been coming to Thailand since my late 20s, and stupidly thought I was something special because I was young and handsome, compared to the old and ugly... guess what... I am old and ugly now, and the girls treat me exactly the same... don't believe you own publicity... you are special just like everyone else.... it is your money that makes you special... Daewoo Hi Daewoo.. I know I'm gonna leave her but the problem is to pick up the courage to do so. I've made good relationships with her family back home in particular her fatherless son. I'm finding it hard to leave her even as there are no valid reasons to stay gee now there is a son, well there usually is a kid involved but this story gets more pathetic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digitalbanana Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 That's the right answer! Stereotype every Thai woman that comes from a rural background! (instead of questioning the choices you made and perhaps looking at them?) I sense sarcasm. Look, 90% of the BMs here have posted that these thai girls should not be easily trusted as they have a very different background as compared to us farangs. You aren't reading the advise given to you. Time to man up and face facts. The girl you mention is a bar girl. That's a whore in my books. You don't have to worry about "leaving" her <deleted>. She's dumping you for a punter for the most vile reason - money. His time will likely come as well. By then, if you have any sense, you'll have finished your studies be loaded up with cash and look back at these silly postings with a laugh and some disbelief as the rest of us are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tassini Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 For the OP it is time for a reality check. Guys who take up with whores are bad enough but taking on the kids of a whore too! Just ask yourself if it would ever back home in UK/US/AUS................................ Here in LOS it seems to be a national sport. Tas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdinasia Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 Whilst avoiding some of the more negative terms used in recent posts ..... I would say ....... "There are no victims in this story, only volunteers" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jawnie Posted March 9, 2011 Share Posted March 9, 2011 First, I want to acknowledge that you've been dating her for quite a while and have some worthwhile history with this woman. But, the way I would present my advice to you is this: I would never, ever, get involved, physically or emotionally, with a bar girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuckarooBanzai Posted March 9, 2011 Share Posted March 9, 2011 she has responsibilities to her family & they will come first, her own happiness will come very last so I suggest you move on with your life. You sound young & quite honestly probably could do without the drama & hassle that comes with having a "girlfriend" from the industry. Finish your studies & find a girl who is free to follow her own heart & not financial security. This is the best response I have read on any thread. Good job Boo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mstribling Posted March 10, 2011 Share Posted March 10, 2011 Are you still hitting it? If so, and it's that good then play along. Your young. It's no big deal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balhamred Posted March 11, 2011 Share Posted March 11, 2011 She is in los now n will just be comin here for 5 days because she needs to return to farangland again next weekend. Man, I don't know how am I gonna be with her after knowing the 'whole' story. I know I have to brealk it down with her during her time here but I just don't know how. Its not the same situation with girls here. And she's paying for her flight whilst I have booked accomodation..I feel really dumb now to be honest.. you would have to ask the question of where she is getting the money for the flight? certainly not from her work in the bar because that isn't enough. its pretty clear the flight to farangland is sponsored by the english bf while you are sponsoring the accomodation - she's getting a pretty good deal out of this, no? especially if you then pick up the costs of the food + drink which lets face it, you probably will feel obliged to. and once you can assume that he is paying for the flight, you would ask what she has told him to get him to pay for it? i hope the answers to these questions will make you feel less compassionate to this girl and more headstrong in doing the right thing for you, because every single thing you've mentioned in your posts has thrown up red flags for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Semper Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Her performance was first class. This is her reward. +1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 16, 2011 Author Share Posted March 16, 2011 Are you still hitting it? If so, and it's that good then play along. Your young. It's no big deal. Great advice in my humble opinion. I think the best way to approach this is for me to lose the seriousness and pick up some fun! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldgent Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 young man if you had a hands up by all the replies you have had you will find a majority in favour of you moving on. thai ladies do have a certian feeling of love. maybe this one wants you but you do not have enough money for her. bottom line. Move on . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GizmoBKK Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Great advice in my humble opinion. I think the best way to approach this is for me to lose the seriousness and pick up some fun! So, how was the long weekend...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panhandler007 Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 I'll go out on a limb here... You are probably young, but without much hope of her converting you into a paycheque... He is old(er) and has a high likelyhood of being converted into a paycheque... She has no need to cut you loose completely... in a few years, her English Boyfriend might dump her arse, or she might have been with him long enough that she can screw money out of him when she leaves... The cost to her of keeping you on the hook is some time on the phone, and a few crocodile tears... Forget the bullshit about her needing to support her family... she is just lazy, and marrying a farang is the easiest way for her not to need to get a real job... If it was about the family there are a billion jobs that she could do, give them some money, and stay with you... Move on, find another one... send her a photo... hope you don't get screwed around by the new model... I only just read the last line of your post where you say she is a bargirl.... I've been coming to Thailand since my late 20s, and stupidly thought I was something special because I was young and handsome, compared to the old and ugly... guess what... I am old and ugly now, and the girls treat me exactly the same... don't believe you own publicity... you are special just like everyone else.... it is your money that makes you special... Daewoo DAEWOO! whoÉ DAEWOO!É Sorry, but they dont make the best cars in the world. Worked from them years ago when they were about the be sold off to GM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panhandler007 Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 You have a Thai GF and have problems! SHOCKING!!! I just fell off my chair.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 17, 2011 Author Share Posted March 17, 2011 Great advice in my humble opinion. I think the best way to approach this is for me to lose the seriousness and pick up some fun! So, how was the long weekend...? hey! She just went home yesterday. Weekend was great. We had fun partying and all and i got to know that her sponsor 'bf' has stopped contacting her because of me. Its just gonna get more difficult from here on i guess I want to let her go but a part of me feels so attached to her.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GizmoBKK Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 Oh dear... And what part exactly is it that feels so attached? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fanfanfan Posted March 17, 2011 Author Share Posted March 17, 2011 Oh dear... And what part exactly is it that feels so attached? Well I am fallin for her to tell u the truth. I hv not been so emotionally attached with a farang girl as I am now with her. But I know I don't have the financial resources to support her n she knows that. I'm pretty sure its just a matter of time before she goes back to work as a bg. I honestly don't know how to bail out now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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