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A guy walks into a bar with a crocodile. The bartender goes, "You can't bring that animal in here!" But the guy says, "Hey, he does tricks. Watch!" He taps on the crocodile's head, and the beast opens its mouth. The guy unzips his pants, whips out his vulnerable member, and puts it in the crocodile's mouth. Then he taps on the crocodile's head again, and the beast closes its mouth. Everyone in the bar is aghast. The guy gets his penis out, and he goes, "I'll give 100 bucks to anyone who can do that." Everyone is really, really quiet. Suddenly, a drunk shouts, "I... I think I can do that. But I don't think I can leave my mouth open that long!"

Future headlines, year 68225: Humans escape from Human Zoo by climbing over fence. 200 maintenance crocs have gone looking for them. Humans' favorite place to hide, is up in leafy trees. Zoo officials are confident that the humans that don't get butchered for skin bags and meat by local crocs, will get rounded up and placed safely back in the zoo. Croc officials have informed the local croc population not to panic, as the escaped humans aren't used to finding their own food outside the zoo, so the worst that can happen to resident crocs is to get tied up by rope and knifed.

Future headlines, year 68225: Humans escape from Human Zoo by climbing over fence. 200 maintenance crocs have gone looking for them. Humans' favorite place to hide, is up in leafy trees. Zoo officials are confident that the humans that don't get butchered for skin bags and meat by local crocs, will get rounded up and placed safely back in the zoo. Croc officials have informed the local croc population not to panic, as the escaped humans aren't used to finding their own food outside the zoo, so the worst that can happen to resident crocs is to get tied up by rope and knifed.

What a crock!

UPDATE

29 escaped Crocodiles caught following flood damage at Pattaya Crocodile Farm

PATTAYA: -- It appears that all 29 crocodiles that escaped from the Million Year Stone Park and Crocodile Farm during the weekend floods have now been captured; however the owner of the Farm cannot be entirely sure all escapees have been accounted for. During the night and throughout Wednesday Morning, staff from the Farm continued to round-up the crocodiles who are now safely back at the tourist attraction located in east Pattaya. The Farm is offering a reward of 5,000 Baht to anyone who has information on the whereabouts of any outstanding crocodiles.

Full story and pictures HERE

-- Pattaya One 2011-09-14

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Lock up your dogs..!!!

If they don't know how many are missing but are confident that they will get them all back then how will they know when to stop looking for them?

When they have found them all.

If they don't know how many are missing but are confident that they will get them all back then how will they know when to stop looking for them?

When they have found them all.

That's logical, why didn't I think of that?

The Farm is offering a reward of 5,000 Baht to anyone who has information on the whereabouts of any outstanding crocodiles.

Wow, that is a loaded one.

UPDATE

29 escaped Crocodiles caught following flood damage at Pattaya Crocodile Farm

PATTAYA: -- It appears that all 29 crocodiles that escaped from the Million Year Stone Park and Crocodile Farm during the weekend floods have now been captured; however the owner of the Farm cannot be entirely sure all escapees have been accounted for. During the night and throughout Wednesday Morning, staff from the Farm continued to round-up the crocodiles who are now safely back at the tourist attraction located in east Pattaya. The Farm is offering a reward of 5,000 Baht to anyone who has information on the whereabouts of any outstanding crocodiles.

Full story and pictures HERE

-- Pattaya One 2011-09-14

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I'm a bit confused - the article states all 29 that escaped have been found, It then goes on to offer a reward for ones that are missing - I think these idiots have no clue as to how many have escaped. I will avoid the area for the time being!

are any of the local restaurants planning some rare "specials" now that we have some of these on the lose?

just a thought! lol

I'll have a crocodile sandwich, and make it SNAPPY!

5,000 THB Reward For Escaped Pattaya Crocodile

Million Year Stone Park and Pattya Crocodile Farm reported that 29 of the escaped crocodiles have been recaptured. In case additional crocodiles are found there is a 5,000 THB reward per crocodile.

Pattaya (September 14, 2011) [PDN]; The Pattaya crocodile hunt is still on. In the morning of September 14, the staff of the Million Year Stone Park and Crocodile Farm Pattaya, mobilised a croc hunting team of more than 30 people to hunt down every single escaped crocodile.

Mr Suan Panonvattanakul, Chairman of the Park together with park officers reported that the crocodiles escaped from their breeding ponds due to the severe rain storm which hit Pattaya on September 11, 2011.

Full story and pictures HERE

-- Pattaya Daily News 2011-09-16

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Million Year Stone Park and Crocodile Farm

Didn't know about that extended moniker. Guess the million year BS didn't work so well then.

Wow, a whopping 5000 THB! I doubt someone will risk their lives in order to catch a crocodile for that (ridiculously small) amount of money.

Wow 5000 Baht...I,m on my way,hope I can fit at least one in the back of my Honda City...probably have to fold the back seats down.

Maybe they'll head to beach road as there they can blend in with the rest of the reptiles lined up down there..

Ha HA!!!! Awesome !! Bunch of freaks!!!

Yingluck apaarently just denied that she was trying to bring them back!!!!!!!!