billd766 Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 A lot of you guys live with the MILs I'm shore the majority of the world would not respect you. In my case you got that the wrong way around. My mother in law lives with us in her own small house that we built with her in mind. She is also a year younger than me, speaks no English at all and every morning I give her her diabetes injection and in the afternoon she does it herself. Also I really couldn't give a rats axxx whether the world respects me or not as the world certainly doesn't know me. Have a nice day. I know that I will. Your Mother In Law is YOUNGER than you??? Did I read that right or is it a typo? Not judging you but have not heard of this before, most our mother in laws are older than their son in laws. Actually that is true. To put it in perspective I am 67 and she is 66. Today is my wife's birthday and she will be anywhere between 29 again (and again)to perhaps 32 or at a push 34. The fact that she is not reading this means that in real life she is 46 but please don't tell her I told you.
billd766 Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Hope so, as you sound quite angry. Not angry but bored with people who just make assumptions and generalise.
dobadoy Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 It may be a language thing. I can tell my wife something in English and she doesn't pay much attention. But when someone tells her the same thing in Mandarin, it is 100% right. No, it's not a language thing. It doesn't matter whether you speak Thai or not. Foreigners are not deemed a credible source of anything except cash and English proficiency. I've had exactly the same experience as the OP more times than I can count. Being right in the past doesn't confer any credibility on any future pronoucement either. Sometimes I do get recognition (after the fact) for 'telling the future' (spouting common sense) along the lines of 'Wow! look even the farang said that would happen! Wasn't he lucky to guess right!!' Live with it. It's only a matter of pride.
thaibeachlovers Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 It may be a language thing. I can tell my wife something in English and she doesn't pay much attention. But when someone tells her the same thing in Mandarin, it is 100% right. Just a thai thing. I can make suggestions to my wife (Thai) on various things and she thinks they are riduclous and pays no attention. The next day she will come up with a solution which is identical to that I proposed. I just say great idea dear and help her implement her own ideas and all is well. The way to go is to plant the seed in thier minds and let them "Think" it is thier brainwave and not yours. Hmmmm. I must be lucky then, as my wife knows that I am a genius, and always asks my advice. LOL.
softgeorge Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 A lot of you guys live with the MILs I'm shore the majority of the world would not respect you. In my case you got that the wrong way around. My mother in law lives with us in her own small house that we built with her in mind. She is also a year younger than me, speaks no English at all and every morning I give her her diabetes injection and in the afternoon she does it herself. Also I really couldn't give a rats axxx whether the world respects me or not as the world certainly doesn't know me. Have a nice day. I know that I will. Your Mother In Law is YOUNGER than you??? Did I read that right or is it a typo? Not judging you but have not heard of this before, most our mother in laws are older than their son in laws. Actually that is true. To put it in perspective I am 67 and she is 66. Today is my wife's birthday and she will be anywhere between 29 again (and again)to perhaps 32 or at a push 34. The fact that she is not reading this means that in real life she is 46 but please don't tell her I told you. Well good on you. As I said I was judging you. The good thing is that MIL as per thai culture needs to pay you respect as you are the elder.
GooEng Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 i think this scenario is another where farang often feel it's them as a farang who's opinion is being ignored, when in fact the people ignoring them are just as likely to ignore anyone else's opinion. not saying, it never happens cos i know it does - i have experienced it myself - its just that i think there's a definite tendency for farang to jump to the conclusion that they are victims of racism, when in fact the people ignoring them would do the same to anyone. same goes for the assumption that Thai women are especially awful to farang men. its simply not true, ask any Thai bloke.
GooEng Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 i think this scenario is another where farang often feel it's them as a farang who's opinion is being ignored, when in fact the people ignoring them are just as likely to ignore anyone else's opinion. not saying, it never happens cos i know it does - i have experienced it myself - its just that i think there's a definite tendency for farang to jump to the conclusion that they are victims of racism, when in fact the people ignoring them would do the same to anyone. same goes for the assumption that Thai women are especially awful to farang men. its simply not true, ask any Thai bloke.
hehehoho Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Hope so, as you sound quite angry. Not angry but bored with people who just make assumptions and generalise. You definitely sounded angry. You didn't sound bored at all. In fact, if you were bored of it you probably would have just closed the page and forgotten about it, instead of responding to it with a long post featuring angry overtones. Just saying like.
Firefish Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 I think this could happen anywhere in the world, though I would expect it to have worn off after 10 years.
endure Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Your Mother In Law is YOUNGER than you??? Did I read that right or is it a typo? Not judging you but have not heard of this before, most our mother in laws are older than thier son in laws. 'Not judging you' Really? You could have fooled me.
ihunnieibee Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 I can relate as my bf is Thai. The past few weeks we have been having fights every single day mostly about the flood situation. He won't listen to me, actually last night he even told me "Use your brain." I've been with him a little more than 5 years but the 2 of those 5 years that we have been living here have been very hard for me and as of this cultural differences thing I'm wanting to just give up. I love him but I've tried so hard, I don't want to cry everyday. Sometimes I just miss being truly understood. (He lived in the US for 7 years and I know he perfectly understands English and everything) ..but to be truly understood and have someone that understands where I'm coming from and at least values my opinion or outlook is greatly appreciated. I say something-- I'm dumb and don't make sense. His parents or anyone Thai says same thing-- They're God. They know everything. I'm so lonely with him. I love Thailand but sometimes the cultural differences are too hard for me to deal with. I love him but I'm really starting to think that I would be better off with someone else. ..sorry for writing so much...just feeling crappy right now
flying Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 ..sorry for writing so much...just feeling crappy right now Sorry to hear that & hope it gets better for you. Also hope you speak with your BF & explain how it makes you feel. Lastly... hopefully he will understand & try to rectify the situation. Chok Dee
softgeorge Posted October 25, 2011 Posted October 25, 2011 Your Mother In Law is YOUNGER than you??? Did I read that right or is it a typo? Not judging you but have not heard of this before, most our mother in laws are older than thier son in laws. 'Not judging you' Really? You could have fooled me. You must be easily fooled then. I actually admire the guy.
rangefinder Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 I can relate as my bf is Thai. The past few weeks we have been having fights every single day mostly about the flood situation. He won't listen to me, actually last night he even told me "Use your brain." I've been with him a little more than 5 years but the 2 of those 5 years that we have been living here have been very hard for me and as of this cultural differences thing I'm wanting to just give up. I love him but I've tried so hard, I don't want to cry everyday. Sometimes I just miss being truly understood. (He lived in the US for 7 years and I know he perfectly understands English and everything) ..but to be truly understood and have someone that understands where I'm coming from and at least values my opinion or outlook is greatly appreciated. I say something-- I'm dumb and don't make sense. His parents or anyone Thai says same thing-- They're God. They know everything. I'm so lonely with him. I love Thailand but sometimes the cultural differences are too hard for me to deal with. I love him but I'm really starting to think that I would be better off with someone else. ..sorry for writing so much...just feeling crappy right now well, better wake up then ! His family and friends know you are stupid because you are with him.
baboon Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 To go off at a tangent for a moment; am I the only farang husband who failed to predict these dreadful floods around the country and the aftermath?
seedy Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 ..sorry for writing so much...just feeling crappy right now [/quote My hope for a resolution to your trouble soon. I went thru the same thing with my girlfriend - am STILL going thru it. Will it ever end ... no. Always been independent - but after coming to Thailand and meeting my GF I came to rely on her for cultural interpretations. Now that I have been here a while, my independence has returned as I get more used to being here - know my way around a fair bit. As the Bard said - "To Thine own self be True' If you are not happy and fulfilled as a person, how can you make anyone else happy or fulfilled. Chin Up - Never Surrender.
softgeorge Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 I can relate as my bf is Thai. The past few weeks we have been having fights every single day mostly about the flood situation. He won't listen to me, actually last night he even told me "Use your brain." I've been with him a little more than 5 years but the 2 of those 5 years that we have been living here have been very hard for me and as of this cultural differences thing I'm wanting to just give up. I love him but I've tried so hard, I don't want to cry everyday. Sometimes I just miss being truly understood. (He lived in the US for 7 years and I know he perfectly understands English and everything) ..but to be truly understood and have someone that understands where I'm coming from and at least values my opinion or outlook is greatly appreciated. I say something-- I'm dumb and don't make sense. His parents or anyone Thai says same thing-- They're God. They know everything. I'm so lonely with him. I love Thailand but sometimes the cultural differences are too hard for me to deal with. I love him but I'm really starting to think that I would be better off with someone else. ..sorry for writing so much...just feeling crappy right now well, better wake up then ! His family and friends know you are stupid because you are with him. Wooh up there a step my friend. If you love someone that does not put you in the stupid category. She just needs to learn the Thai way where the woman is the ultimate power in a household.
thaibeachlovers Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 To go off at a tangent for a moment; am I the only farang husband who failed to predict these dreadful floods around the country and the aftermath? Probably.
Berkshire Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don’t listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT’S JUST YOU.
Swiss1960 Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 Tell you about Russian women... they are even worse... I had a Russian girlfriend here in Switzerland, she lived here six months when i met her... and I tell you when we discussed Swiss issues... she would never believe ME, but always tell me that "my Russian Girl Friend told me different so you must be wrong..." obviously, that relationship ended soon...
maxme Posted October 26, 2011 Posted October 26, 2011 get out from the issan village! and join the civilization.. It´s not an Issan thing bud, even have that in the south so it's more a Thai thing than Issan thing.
softgeorge Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don't listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT'S JUST YOU. Well thanks you just destroyed all my self esteem. Now I feel totally incompetent and worthless.
hehehoho Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 What? I wasn't listening. Oh look, someone's making somtam.
samran Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don’t listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT’S JUST YOU. Something for people to think about.
Berkshire Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don't listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT'S JUST YOU. Well thanks you just destroyed all my self esteem. Now I feel totally incompetent and worthless. My apologies. But then again, I was just "supposing...."
softgeorge Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don't listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT'S JUST YOU. Well thanks you just destroyed all my self esteem. Now I feel totally incompetent and worthless. My apologies. But then again, I was just "supposing...." That's ok I was just kidding anyway. Back to the bar to recharge my self esteem
billd766 Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Your Mother In Law is YOUNGER than you??? Did I read that right or is it a typo? Not judging you but have not heard of this before, most our mother in laws are older than thier son in laws. 'Not judging you' Really? You could have fooled me. You must be easily fooled then. I actually admire the guy. Thank you for the kind comment. My old Mum back in the UK used to tell me to be happy that people are talking about you. It means that they are leaving everybody else alone. Be worried if they don't talk about as that means that they don't care. PS I am happy really most of the time.
F1fanatic Posted October 27, 2011 Posted October 27, 2011 Supposing….just supposing, it has nothing to do with being a foreigner in Thailand at all. Your opinion never did matter. No one listened to you back in your homeland, and no one is listening to you now. Your opinion has never mattered. This is not directed at only the OP, but the other sheeps on this thread. The Thais don't listen to you, but then no one back home listened to you either. It has nothing to do with the Thais. IT'S JUST YOU. That's really sad - if NOBODY has ever listened to you then obviously you are seriously deficient in some way . To look on the bright side, it sounds as if you have come to terms with this - whilst making the mistaken, but understandable, assumption that it is the same for everyone.
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