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Pseudolus

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I have never understood why someone lives in a country where they are miserable. The first thing that pops into my mind is that the worldly, well traveled and educated farang was outsmarted by a Thai country girl. For that reason and now not being able to afford to relocate is perhaps why they stay.

some people are miserable wherever they are, its just the way they are.

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oh brother... in any country, the immigrants complain. ive been in israel for 30 years, three kids, one divorce, one thai issaan husband, and YES i still complain, whinge, say things like "in america , when was a kid.... " or "if this was in america then xxxx wouldnt have happened..." ; so my kids say: mom, so move back. and then i say: i cant. ive been here more then ive been there, my friends are here, and my repsected enemies, my dogs, my jargon, my clothes and the things i eat... i discovered that when in july i was in the states and went in to reverse culture shock... while here is definately shit (wars, terrorists, diesal up to 8.25 shekel /litre!!!!!!!!!!! sick.gifsick.gif taxes raised yesterday to 17%sick.gifsick.gifsick.gif ) its still more or less my home since i do not have anywhere or anyone to go back to....

so frankly, ex pat whinging happens, some of it is habitual (when a group of anglos sit around we tend to whinge, when we have overseas guests we have nothing but pride in our adoptive country.)...

the thais sit around here also complaining constantly but still and all, we get calls all the time to get visas for work, again, with the same 'bastard' employer on the same tomato farm, regardless...its just human nature.

submaniac: issues go with you wherever u go, mental luggage goes with u everywhere unlike real luggage which can end up in hong kong or timbuktu... all in all, although i didnt enjy germany, nor like the language, i do not dislike germans (regardless of 30 years of brainwashing here.); the same i can say for others, one brit's nastiness does not make all nasty. here, when one drunk thai worker rapes a girl on the farm where he works , the entire country is up in arms about foreign workers, sex crazed thais, etc.... but should someone hate a group for the actions of one or two ??

and yet, i also want to say to people, if u really dont like it, then go somewhere else.i know they probably cant go anywhere, and they probably dont really dislike it so much, but human nature is that way... and it is different then racism as such. trust me... as a mixed couple here we do suffer from ignorant racism by good hearted people, and by disgusting folks also... but i am secure with myself, and happy with my house. my house being me. regardless of where i physically live. every country has its garbage dump , its whores, and its druggies, parasites, and garbage dumps, stupid holidays, dumb laws, and wierdnesses. every culture has its 'thangs' that make it what it is for good or bad. some can be changed, some should be changed, and some should be used to change others....

thaivisa forum is also an outlet for folks that cant or wont express these things in real life but feel free here to do so. that is also why there is a forum like this... for years i though that some problems with thai hubby were my own doing,turns out its common among several of us here in my country, and among the ladies on the board. if i hadnt complained, i wouldnt have known since here in real life i dont discuss these things with those around me who woould misunderstand my complaining (married a non jew, u deserve it, married a peasant, married one of 'them'... etc etc etc).people who dont want to hear whinging, move on to a different thread. its just a button push away from your fingers

wub.png

bina

israel.

Wow - this is why I fingered you out in another thread as someone who restores my faith in positive human nature. Talk about hitting nail on the head, repeatedly.

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...it appears that Submaniac is having the same.

Now I can talk to the Pseudolus but not Submaniac. Does this have to do with we are both farangs? One could try to insinuate that but doing so without concrete proof that I'm a racist and a bigot would make it a foolish endeavour. Yet SM assumes this and that makes his statements not only invalid but also he is the one that comes out as a racist.

I'm not saying that I totally agree everything the OP has to say but that is not the point I'm making either. To give creds to Submaniac that is he is a man of his words... He couldn't cope and is moving home but if he tried to actually talk to some westerners he would see that the skew perception some farangs have about Thais also applies to the Thais have about farangs.

A few years ago I was in love with a beautiful girl from Vienna. We had talked about flying to Thailand for many many years. She had a terrible fear of flying. For three years, I tried to coach her onto a plane. It didn't work. Finally, finally, finally, I managed to get her on this plane. I wanted to sit next to her and hold her hand to make sure she did not have a panic attack. The airline had the plane at capacity. Everybody was there with someone--girlfriend, wife, kids, family. There was one British individual that was obviously flying by himself. I asked if he would mind changing seats so we could sit together. He initially said yes. But nobody was in their correct seats so everyone went to find their corect seats. When the correct seats were found, I found that I could still sit next to her if he changed. His response was, "no I've already tried to change seats onece and I am not doing it again." Now I had paid $3k for these tickets. I had tried to do this flight for three years. And, my girl was going to have some serious anxiety without me sitting next to her.

But this Brit would not change. His attitude was well it's my seat you can't have it. The typical 50 year old thin bald British uppercrust "lord of the manner".

It turns out that this flight, was the last time I saw her again. She died about 3 months later. And this was my last chance, and it was ruined by a British snob that was full of himself and his "Britishness" to do a simple thing to change seats. During that flight, I burned his face into my memory. And when I am in Thailand, I am looking for him. He may even be on this forum. (And if you are, know that I am searching for you.)

But the crux of this matter is, that whenever I see some Brit on this board shooting his mouth off about Thailand, or the Thai people I think of the Brit on the plane. Yes, you think you are better and more important than me. You took away my lost opportunity to be with the girl I loved for the sake of your arrogance.

I point out that there are alot of Brits here that I absolutely adore, and am friends with like Thaicbr, Bigbikebkk, BKKjames, and if you count the Scotts as British I adore eek, and theblether and smokie35 and whatnot. So I am not anti British per se. I am anti-the ones that think they are the lord of the plantation during colonial days, and we Thais are there little brown servants. That is what I hate.

And Maxme, I know what I am about. I do not need your psychoanalytical drivel.

Submaniac, I'm trying to understand you... I really do but again I'm not British and good luck on you for dragging them into this just because you have a beef with Pseudolus and me.

I think you have totally misunderstood me in this matter and I rephrase the sentence I used before so even you can understand it.

- I don't agree with everything Pseudolus said but he has his reasons being that way as you have yours being this way and I have never looked down on Thai the way you just described.

I may have reservations against some people but that's the point I still think of them as people. I even have against some of my countrymen. The point is there is good and bad no matter where you are or where you go in this world.

Being direct as I am, I tell what is on my mind but that doesn't necessarily mean that I have bad intentions but it's rather crude and to the point and I know some people do not appreciate that.

I'm sorry to hear about your gal, it's always a sad thing to lose people we love. Time will heal our wounds but the memories will always be there. Try to really talk to a person before you jump to conclusion next time and all will be well. The beer offer is still there if you want it. Cheers thumbsup.gif

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An almost complete circle on this excellent thread.

Submaniac....sorry for your tragic loss....there are some things in life you simply cannot make right no matter how much you wish it.

Remember and focus on your happy times together and look forward positively as she surely would have wished for you.

All the best.

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Ok, we've cleaned up many of the insults from this topic without taking further action, but from this point onward any flames, name calling, or insults will result in more than just your post being deleted. People complain about moderation, yet when left alone it turns into a schoolyard fight. saai.gif

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With cdnvic's admonishment against any further escalations, I am going to bid this thread adieu.

Before I go I will clear something up: I do not hate the British. I never said anywhere in this thread that I hate the British, and I have never said anywhere in my illustrious posting career ever that I hated the British.

Certain people who make remarks that I find particularly offensive happen to be British, and the remarks I made were meant for a certain type of mentality that I see. I would add that alot of fine folks on Thaivisa who I revere, adore and respect, including the esteemed blether, are British and my apologies for painting all British with the same brush as I did not mean to impugn you. (However certain of your countrymen get on my nerves.)

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With cdnvic's admonishment against any further escalations, I am going to bid this thread adieu.

Before I go I will clear something up: I do not hate the British. I never said anywhere in this thread that I hate the British, and I have never said anywhere in my illustrious posting career ever that I hated the British.

Certain people who make remarks that I find particularly offensive happen to be British, and the remarks I made were meant for a certain type of mentality that I see. I would add that alot of fine folks on Thaivisa who I revere, adore and respect, including the esteemed blether, are British and my apologies for painting all British with the same brush as I did not mean to impugn you. (However certain of your countrymen get on my nerves.)

...and then I look at your signature....

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im british,

and certain people from all countries get on my nerves, even plenty from the uk, but i just let them get on with it, i did once bite back and it got me a week off,

i boxed for years and it tought me to keep my calm, and at 52 i lost it that time, hold it together mate, there is good and bad on here from all countries.

im more then happy living in thailand as many of you no,

lets try and be a happy lot and help each other,

the craic is great on most treds,

jake

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Did I miss something after taking an early night? Having re-read the thread last night I can't see a great deal that has been deleted aside from a few affirmations from a member who in theblethers opinion is an esteemed member that he does hate all Brits and some talk about constipation.

@theblether - If I may be so rude to address you directly (doffs cap a few times). This esteemed member of yours, into the middle of what has been regarded by most people as a well mannered, good natured and interesting thread, decided to unload something that was nothing to do with the thread itself, was both extraneous and inflammatory; the very definition of trolling. Is your definition of trolling anything that you personally disagree with? One could perhaps, and I mean this with all due respect as you are indeed one of the board most esteemed members, see your post as being trolling as well? I temper this on the basis that your outrage might have been directed at posts that happened after I went to bed last night so there might have been justification in it (yes, I have seen the joke board, I know the extent of the racism here). I get called a bigot on here, I am not. I get called a racist, I am not. The shade of a persons skin and the race into which they are born does not mean they are better or worse than anyone else, but it also does not mean that someone can not be racist just because they are not white.

There are two posters in this thread who should be applauded, Bina, and Guesthouse. They both hit the nail on the head very succinctly. If you run your mouse over my original post and highlight the whole thread, you will notice that I put in a little hidden prediction in there. On post 12, a kind mod had deleted all of the posts I had predicted - Viva La Moderators smile.png))))

Edited by Pseudolus
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Hey Pseudolus,

theblether did not write those comments (and I do not want to drag him into this). So if you have any comments, concerns, questions, or witty retorts you can address them to me.

Another thread or a PM would probably be best as the esteemed cdnvic has dropped a hint that he is tired of cleaning up this thread, and that is pretty much a papal bull for this thread to cool down.

And theblether, I would add I think you are one of the finest examples of what Britain is capable of producing.

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...it appears that Submaniac is having the same.

Now I can talk to the Pseudolus but not Submaniac. Does this have to do with we are both farangs? One could try to insinuate that but doing so without concrete proof that I'm a racist and a bigot would make it a foolish endeavour. Yet SM assumes this and that makes his statements not only invalid but also he is the one that comes out as a racist.

I'm not saying that I totally agree everything the OP has to say but that is not the point I'm making either. To give creds to Submaniac that is he is a man of his words... He couldn't cope and is moving home but if he tried to actually talk to some westerners he would see that the skew perception some farangs have about Thais also applies to the Thais have about farangs.

A few years ago I was in love with a beautiful girl from Vienna. We had talked about flying to Thailand for many many years. She had a terrible fear of flying. For three years, I tried to coach her onto a plane. It didn't work. Finally, finally, finally, I managed to get her on this plane. I wanted to sit next to her and hold her hand to make sure she did not have a panic attack. The airline had the plane at capacity. Everybody was there with someone--girlfriend, wife, kids, family. There was one British individual that was obviously flying by himself. I asked if he would mind changing seats so we could sit together. He initially said yes. But nobody was in their correct seats so everyone went to find their corect seats. When the correct seats were found, I found that I could still sit next to her if he changed. His response was, "no I've already tried to change seats onece and I am not doing it again." Now I had paid $3k for these tickets. I had tried to do this flight for three years. And, my girl was going to have some serious anxiety without me sitting next to her.

But this Brit would not change. His attitude was well it's my seat you can't have it. The typical 50 year old thin bald British uppercrust "lord of the manner".

It turns out that this flight, was the last time I saw her again. She died about 3 months later. And this was my last chance, and it was ruined by a British snob that was full of himself and his "Britishness" to do a simple thing to change seats. During that flight, I burned his face into my memory. And when I am in Thailand, I am looking for him. He may even be on this forum. (And if you are, know that I am searching for you.)

But the crux of this matter is, that whenever I see some Brit on this board shooting his mouth off about Thailand, or the Thai people I think of the Brit on the plane. Yes, you think you are better and more important than me. You took away my lost opportunity to be with the girl I loved for the sake of your arrogance.

I point out that there are alot of Brits here that I absolutely adore, and am friends with like Thaicbr, Bigbikebkk, BKKjames, and if you count the Scotts as British I adore eek, and theblether and smokie35 and whatnot. So I am not anti British per se. I am anti-the ones that think they are the lord of the plantation during colonial days, and we Thais are there little brown servants. That is what I hate.

And Maxme, I know what I am about. I do not need your psychoanalytical drivel.

Can somepone explain how going on a holiday with the love of his life and not being able to sit next to her on the plane, because he did not buy seats next to each other, and that this was the last time that he saw her and that the farang cheated him of his last chance to be with her, sitting next to her on a plane, before she died...3 months later.

What happened to the holiday time in Thailand together ?

Very strange.

Tis why i think he is having a lend of the lot of you...especially the poms.

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we did spend the time together. I wanted to sit with her on the plane coming in because she was so scared of flying and had not been on a airplane before. She wanted to be next to me. Like have you ever been around someone who has a serious phobia about flying? Is it really hard to understand?

Edited by submaniac
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It turns out that this flight, was the last time I saw her again. She died about 3 months later.

we did spend the time together. I wanted to sit with her on the plane coming in because she was so scared of flying and had not been on a airplane before. She wanted to be next to me. Like have you ever been around someone who has a serious phobia about flying? Is it really hard to understand?

That is not hard to understand, I would want the same thing, but if it was so important and so 'logical' why did you not book the seats next to each other ?

But mainly, your comment above does not make any sense to your reasoning of the problem.

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we did spend the time together. I wanted to sit with her on the plane coming in because she was so scared of flying and had not been on a airplane before. She wanted to be next to me. Like have you ever been around someone who has a serious phobia about flying? Is it really hard to understand?

I had a friend that was/is scared of heights.

I took him out over a decrepit balcony on a ruined temple that hung out over a maybe 40m drop to the ocean below.

I had to hold his hand.

I think that is where it all may have started.

Thanks for letting me remember those repressed memories.

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If somebody is complaining about things a lot, eventually people want them out of their hair. In my work, I tell those that I oversee that if they want to come in to complain about something they need to have at least a couple good/creative solutions to what they want to complain about.

I'm new to this particular branch of Thaivisa forums, so I have not read your comments. I however have known more than my share of people who constantly complain and don't seem to appreciate how nice it actually is to live here. Of course it is good to want things to improve, but really we can only start with ourselves and see what we can do personally, setting a good example, etc. You won't get anyone else to change.

Therefore, I guess if it is unbearable then you should find another place. If it is bearable and you can contribute to make it better, then thank you! If you want to stay but don't want to contribute to make it better, then stay quiet about it! :)

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I did. I spent alot of money on those tickets of course I was going to ask to sit together. The connecting flight from Vienna got delayed. Delayed passengers got put on another plane and it was overfilled.

can you explain this but

It turns out that this flight, was the last time I saw her again. She died about 3 months later.

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^^

written poorly.

The trip was the last time together. This was our last "big hurrah" together. No one expected her to go like that. On the trip over she had to take medication, which pretty much knocked her out on the flight. One of my relatives got sick. I was going to fly back with her, but she said she could fly back on her own. (Since she had gotten used to the flying--it was only the take offs and landings that were really scary.)

@pseudolus--the threads getting a bit old. cdnvic said he didn't want to clean this up anymore, and whatever it is I would say--would create more mess for him to clean up. So I will try my best to refrain from further discussion (unless it's to answer questions so people don't think I made this entire thing up.)

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