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Jokes,

Featured Replies

All from the UK Daily Star today.

What have Gareth Gates and Fred West got in common.? Neither can finish a sentance.....!

Whats got three legs and lives on a farm...? Heather and Paul McCartney....

In a hospital helping victims of landmines, a little girl wakes up and says, "Doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, "I know, we had to amputate your arms".....

What has four legs and an arm..? A Doberman in a playground....!

Police who searched Paula Yates's London flat found, Amphetamines, Angel Dust and Ecstacy, they are still looking for the fourth child....!

There were a couple more but, they were really shit..... :o

redrus

Police who searched Paula Yates's London flat found, Amphetamines, Angel Dust and Ecstacy, they are still looking for the fourth child....!

:o Nice :D

:D:D:D

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it's worth it.

Q. What is a Yankee?

A. The same as quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?

A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?

A. About three inches.

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?

A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

A. It's not hard.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?

A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

A: Breasts don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?

A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?

A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A. They don't have balls to scratch.

:o:D:D

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