Why AreExpats So Stuck Up

[baneko]

If someone I don't know wants to say Hi to me, I'll think they are a dash weird... That doesn't make me stuck up, it just makes me think you might be a bit of a nut-job...

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

A counter question may be asked: "Do people think you are weird if you say Hi to strangers and expect a response ?"

What an idiot! I was told to open doors for people you don't know, be polite even to people you do not know and smile and say hello.

I live in a small village close to Phanat Nikhom and there is another old farang man in the village. When I saw him at the village shop I stopped my bike introduced myself and we sat down and had some beer.

If you classify this as weird you need to give yourself a shake and head home and talk to yourself. Clown.

Geez, how rude. You don't realize that some people are extroverted and some are introverted? Just because you will approach random strangers for no reason doesn't mean everyone else has to accept this as normal. In America, our parents teach us "not to talk to strangers." This applies mostly to children, but even in adulthood, many of us would just like to be left alone and mind our own business. And if I were to evaluate complete strangers who have approached me in Thailand, I'd say that most are typically a bit creepy. I mean, seriously, those of us who are busy with our lives, family, friends, etc., we don't go around trying to chit-chat with people we don't know. Parties and social gatherings, ok, but just out on the street? Or some fake, meaningless greeting to a stranger? So pointless.

In America....How many times have I heard a sentence started with that quote. IN AMERICA you are scared to talk to anyone because of your gun law is basically anyone can buy a gun. This is for personal protection of course.

Do you want everyone to walk about like zombies and not socially interact...like IN AMERICA...

[baneko]

If someone I don't know wants to say Hi to me, I'll think they are a dash weird... That doesn't make me stuck up, it just makes me think you might be a bit of a nut-job...

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

A counter question may be asked: "Do people think you are weird if you say Hi to strangers and expect a response ?"

What an idiot! I was told to open doors for people you don't know, be polite even to people you do not know and smile and say hello.

I live in a small village close to Phanat Nikhom and there is another old farang man in the village. When I saw him at the village shop I stopped my bike introduced myself and we sat down and had some beer.

If you classify this as weird you need to give yourself a shake and head home and talk to yourself. Clown.

Geez, how rude. You don't realize that some people are extroverted and some are introverted? Just because you will approach random strangers for no reason doesn't mean everyone else has to accept this as normal. In America, our parents teach us "not to talk to strangers." This applies mostly to children, but even in adulthood, many of us would just like to be left alone and mind our own business. And if I were to evaluate complete strangers who have approached me in Thailand, I'd say that most are typically a bit creepy. I mean, seriously, those of us who are busy with our lives, family, friends, etc., we don't go around trying to chit-chat with people we don't know. Parties and social gatherings, ok, but just out on the street? Or some fake, meaningless greeting to a stranger? So pointless.

In America....How many times have I heard a sentence started with that quote. IN AMERICA you are scared to talk to anyone because of your gun law is basically anyone can buy a gun. This is for personal protection of course.

Do you want everyone to walk about like zombies and not socially interact...like IN AMERICA...

[baneko]

If someone I don't know wants to say Hi to me, I'll think they are a dash weird... That doesn't make me stuck up, it just makes me think you might be a bit of a nut-job...

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

A counter question may be asked: "Do people think you are weird if you say Hi to strangers and expect a response ?"

What an idiot! I was told to open doors for people you don't know, be polite even to people you do not know and smile and say hello.

I live in a small village close to Phanat Nikhom and there is another old farang man in the village. When I saw him at the village shop I stopped my bike introduced myself and we sat down and had some beer.

If you classify this as weird you need to give yourself a shake and head home and talk to yourself. Clown.

Geez, how rude. You don't realize that some people are extroverted and some are introverted? Just because you will approach random strangers for no reason doesn't mean everyone else has to accept this as normal. In America, our parents teach us "not to talk to strangers." This applies mostly to children, but even in adulthood, many of us would just like to be left alone and mind our own business. And if I were to evaluate complete strangers who have approached me in Thailand, I'd say that most are typically a bit creepy. I mean, seriously, those of us who are busy with our lives, family, friends, etc., we don't go around trying to chit-chat with people we don't know. Parties and social gatherings, ok, but just out on the street? Or some fake, meaningless greeting to a stranger? So pointless.

In America....How many times have I heard a sentence started with that quote. IN AMERICA you are scared to talk to anyone because of your gun law is basically anyone can buy a gun. This is for personal protection of course.

Do you want everyone to walk about like zombies and not socially interact...like IN AMERICA...

[umbanda]

Join a Expat group. Only foreigners that likes to meet other foreigners are joining those groups. If your town do not have one, look at the closer bigger city. If you feels really isolated, you may need to move.

[baneko]

If someone I don't know wants to say Hi to me, I'll think they are a dash weird... That doesn't make me stuck up, it just makes me think you might be a bit of a nut-job...

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

A counter question may be asked: "Do people think you are weird if you say Hi to strangers and expect a response ?"

What an idiot! I was told to open doors for people you don't know, be polite even to people you do not know and smile and say hello.

I live in a small village close to Phanat Nikhom and there is another old farang man in the village. When I saw him at the village shop I stopped my bike introduced myself and we sat down and had some beer.

If you classify this as weird you need to give yourself a shake and head home and talk to yourself. Clown.

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

An idiot might not read very well... The Op was not discussing a quiet backwater, he's in Bangkok.

Now if you are going to readily throw around terms like idiot because we are in disagreement, you are the type of person many of us prefer to avoid and not say Hi to.

That said - I agree, holding the doors open for anyone anywhere... leaving a trailing hand etc, but not standing there like a door man for 20 ppl to walk through without so much as a nod of thanks...

As far as getting off your bike to go up to somebody and introduce yourself just because you are both white guys ?... I find that a little strange... However, had you both been in the same shop there is nothing wrong with a simple Hi, if a polite conversation progresses from there, then fair enough - again, thats OK in a quiet area... But in Bangkok or any other major city saying hi to strangers is well, strange.

Quieter backwater...Phanat is 1hr from Sukhimvit Bangkok and 45 minutes from Chomburi City and Bang Saen...Not to remote.

As for stopping and talking to an old gentleman. I don't think its strange as we share a common language. I can converse in both Thai and Issan but speaking your home language and having a conversation is neither strange or weird. Why do so many people reside either in Pattaya or BKK. Is it for the social interaction with other farangs or to live next to Foodland?

[FiftyTwo]

Join a Expat group. Only foreigners that likes to meet other foreigners are joining those groups. If your town do not have one, look at the closer bigger city. If you feels really isolated, you may need to move.

... and crooks looking to make money off other foreigners.

[roadrunerboi]

Maybe they have Anton Casey syndrome and need to go to Australia?!?!

[FiftyTwo]

I am a retired farang teacher, and am not the norm, I live in a thai villa and communicate with many of my thai neighbors on a daily basis, I constantly do the traditional thai head nod, smile wave at most everyone when I'm driving my car. I also have taken thai cultural classes and I'm always asking aditional questions concerning the culture. I'm highly respected as a retired senior teacher among the thai people I know.

As for other farangs, I don't think their stuck-up, but rather come from a different mold than asians. For the most part farangs keep to themselves more and are less friendly in public, also farangs smile less in public.

They taught you to be a racist, and you are happy to oblige.

What about black foreigners? or Indian foreigners?

[BusyB]

Here is one to get you started:

Beetlejuice that is one fanTAStic link.

[kingstonkid]

From my experience, when a foreigner made contact if was either to ask for money or to ask for money.

On occasion it was to offer some kind of scam.

I do not believe it is about being stuck up, but rather self preservation, as no doubt many have had somewhat bad experiences with some expats.

You have to be kidding right.

So If i see ou on the street and say hello as we are passing I am looking for money????????????????????????????????????

How much does it coast out of your wallet to say hello and smile????????

I do not want to get a hug and a big kiss all I am wondering is where is the civility and common courtesy.

[BanTamo]

How odd that there's no 'recreational yaba smokers' group on MeetUp's Bangkok page. One would think there's a few of them out there. And it should be a relatively active group of folks.

[kingstonkid]

If someone I don't know wants to say Hi to me, I'll think they are a dash weird... That doesn't make me stuck up, it just makes me think you might be a bit of a nut-job...

In quieter area's, small villages etc there may be other reasons, but in a large city such as Bangkok I don't expect strangers of any nationality to say Hi to me and I certainly don't imagine that I'll go around saying Hi to people I don't know.

A counter question may be asked: "Do people think you are weird if you say Hi to strangers and expect a response ?"

You my friend are what we are talking about. Must be a sad life.

Were you brought up in a small town?

One sees the same cultural problem when a person from a rural country town moves to the big city. All the sophisticated slickers thinks the bumpkin's a bit strange for smiling and greeting people as he walks around, and he wonders what he's doing wrong.

Plus the fact is most people approaching you in Thailand want something from you, are running some sort of scam.

Finally, when I'm here the last people I want to talk to are random foreigners who think we have something in common just because we're both "not Thai". I actually have much more in common with the Thais and they are usually much more interesting - so leave me alone farang!

I have lived in large cities(Toronto, Ottawa. Islamabad) and small I have traveled to different countries.

I was brought up in a large city and was brought up woodstock generation.

I have always no matter where i have lived said hello to people and wished them a good day Yes if they are Aussie i wish G'd Day

I like to try to smile wheni am out and for those that wonder yes i do it with Thai's given the chance. I try not to do it too often with Thai ladies as i am aware of theexpat male stereotype.

To the poster that had a pice of chewing gum given ot his wife. SORRY NOT ME. That i would indeed find weird.

All I am saying is when a person smiles and says HELLO. What is the harm in giving them a nod and smiling back.

To the people that find my actions weird. I feel sorry for you. Obviously your parents did not brig you up that way and you are missing something special.

[BanTamo]

Multiple repeats due to severe impatience deleted

Edited February 3, 2014 by BanTamo

[Clutch]

The ironic thing is here is many respondents won't converse with or acknowledge a 'Hi' from an expat in a social situation in LOS, yet they're quite happy to post on TV all day long with expats they've never met and can't even see!

Maybe they're just socially awkward or a little shy?! But, who cares...

That's my 2 bobs worth!

[dotpoom]

Where I come from people nod, say hello and smile to each other (even though we don't know each other) for no particular reason a lot of the time. OK, it's a small country, maybe that has something to do with it. But most of us were brought up with the principle...."It's nice to be nice".

I personally get a lift when another person is courteous and smiles at me (male or female). Sad to hear that some people are suspicious of this behavior.....I don't suspect that everybody that says hello to me is a con artist and looking for a "mark". If I put on my "pleasant" face before leaving the house....I usually get pleasant reactions from those I come into contact with.....likewise, if I leave with a ...Don't trust any f----- face...well you know what I mean.

[Notable]

If I travel up north I go and stay with a Thai family I know and avoid foreigners. Thailand seems to attract the least intellectual forms of humanity, they start off in pattaya or Phuket and spread out.

[JLCrab]

The ironic thing is here is many respondents won't converse with or acknowledge a 'Hi' from an expat in a social situation in LOS, yet they're quite happy to post on TV all day long with expats they've never met and can't even see!

Maybe they're just socially awkward or a little shy?! But, who cares...

That's my 2 bobs worth!

I agree with Post #151 by CMTourist above, and I prefer to deal with the 'lunatics and scam artists' right here.

[duanebigsby]

OK. First of all, anyone initiating a conversation with me gets a response. I often say hello first, but.....

What a load of tripe about farang teachers!

Perhaps knowing how so many of you guys feel about us teachers, we just don't feel it worthwhile meeting you?

"control freaks LOL not in a Thai school. There is no control.

Uneducated and unqualified? Our job is conversational English, listening and speaking. Any Native English speaker with a half decent education (uni degree) can talk to kids.

Bunch of backpackers and layabouts who can't teach? I'm a qualified teacher back home who just wants to live in Thailand.

Those who can do, do those who can't, teach....... Yeah, yeah we've all heard it, but what I can do is teach, and I'm doing it.

Strut around in their suit and ties thinking they are superior.......we have a dress code, no option.

Seriously though, when I go out after work I do tend to congregate with other teachers as the conversation becomes about strategy and classroom experiences .Does that leave other non-teaching expats out? Yes. But I don't golf and when a bunch of middle aged men start talking like high schoolers about the whores they're boinking, conversation over. seems to me the stuck ups are TV members with teacher issues. OK let the <deleted> fly!

[FiftyTwo]

The ironic thing is here is many respondents won't converse with or acknowledge a 'Hi' from an expat in a social situation in LOS, yet they're quite happy to post on TV all day long with expats they've never met and can't even see!

Maybe they're just socially awkward or a little shy?! But, who cares...

That's my 2 bobs worth!

I don't mind interacting with, crooks, dead-beats, love-lorn, etc. but at a distance, not in person.

[Muhendis]

You actually many not be far wrong, in my limited dealings with school teacher's in Thailand, they have come across the same way, full of a sense of their own importance, but think of it this way they may think they be big fish, but they are in a very small pond indeed

Actually it's the same in the UK. I reckon there is a course on attitude development which is part of the university syllabus. I have heard them in staff rooms and what a load of stuck up pr=cks they are to each other.

[Notable]

I agree with the last post, teachers if anything are more friendly and approachable. Most only come to Thailand for one semester so they don't have the bitter jaded opinions of your average ex-pat. Just steer clear of those small bars where they all sit talking about visa runs and exchange rates. I sat in one 8 years ago listening to endless b/s, 4 years later I returned to see if had changed. Same people same conversation, if someone over 50 tells you they are married to a Thai girl from up north, steer clear.

[transam]

Smile and enjoy life OP.....best wishes to you.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

Yep, dismiss it, keep your smile going and perhaps one day you might meet me and see there can be light at the end of your tunnel.........

I'm not sure the OP wants anyone messing around with his tunnel. A simple 'hello' will suffice

So I must say hello to every post instead of my thoughts. If you want to be wishy washy that is up to you.

[Clutch]

The ironic thing is here is many respondents won't converse with or acknowledge a 'Hi' from an expat in a social situation in LOS, yet they're quite happy to post on TV all day long with expats they've never met and can't even see!

Maybe they're just socially awkward or a little shy?! But, who cares...

That's my 2 bobs worth!

I don't mind interacting with, crooks, dead-beats, love-lorn, etc. but at a distance, not in person.

Not to mention shysters and confidence tricksters!

[Thongkorn]

Sort of off topic, When we where in London, My wife spoke to Some other Thai people on Holiday in London, They seem to be doing the site seeing tour, They just Ignored her, So its not just Expats.

[wym]

But still it amazes me that my fellow travelers look at me as if we are in NYC and passing each other on say 43rd Street and 2nd Avenue on the way to a meeting.

Because that's where we were born and raised, or at least places like that. Most people overseas these days grew up in metro areas, and it's hard to kick old habits.

Sure we are all human. But would it hurt to stick together as foreigners in a foreign land? So next time try and smile. If you get one back.. say, "Hi" or something nice. It can get really lonely here when you are so far from 'home'. It is just polite and rather nice to smile once in a while and to receive on that does not come with a price tag.

But that's my point, just because we both have white skin and speak the same language, even if we are from the same country doesn't give me anything relevant "in common" with you from a human POV. In fact I'm sure I'll have a much more enjoyable conversation with 99% of the Thai's I'm interacting with all day long than I will with some random farang wandering through the neighborhood.

I am a retired farang teacher, and am not the norm, I live in a thai villa and communicate with many of my thai neighbors on a daily basis, I constantly do the traditional thai head nod, smile wave at most everyone when I'm driving my car. I also have taken thai cultural classes and I'm always asking aditional questions concerning the culture. I'm highly respected as a retired senior teacher among the thai people I know.

As for other farangs, I don't think their stuck-up, but rather come from a different mold than asians. For the most part farangs keep to themselves more and are less friendly in public, also farangs smile less in public.

They taught you to be a racist, and you are happy to oblige.

What about black foreigners? or Indian foreigners?

You're just hung up on a semantic issue. Obviously the blacks and Indians - if there were any, in my experience there aren't - would be having an entirely different experience here. The topic is "people who are 'like me'" and obviously we are from many nationalities here, but race is shorthand for 'in group'. As I posted above I agree it's pathetic to think that OR nationality give us anything important in common, but that doesn't make the assumption itself "racist" by any stretch.

[wym]

From my experience, when a foreigner made contact if was either to ask for money or to ask for money.

On occasion it was to offer some kind of scam.

I do not believe it is about being stuck up, but rather self preservation, as no doubt many have had somewhat bad experiences with some expats.

You have to be kidding right.

So If i see ou on the street and say hello as we are passing I am looking for money????????????????????????????????????

How much does it coast out of your wallet to say hello and smile????????

I do not want to get a hug and a big kiss all I am wondering is where is the civility and common courtesy.

As is clear from many posts here, in many "back home" locations, it is rude and a bit crazy to make eye contact, nod or speak to strangers when walking around - it's only "common" courtesy in rural locations AFAIK.

And absolutely yes, in my experience in many many areas of Thailand, when I have opened up and responded to conversations initiated by random strangers in Thailand the vast majority have been scammers looking for money or whackos spouting crazy stuff.

Don't take it personally, but experience here does teach you to just fix your eyes in the distance and keep walking just like you do the tuk tuks and guys offering to predict your future walking down Sukhumvit.

[wym]

This is just what happens when Westerners come to a region beset with third-world countries; it isn't just the foreigners in Thailand, you'll find the same in Singapore (that recent case of the man calling people on public transport smelly comes to mind), Hong Kong (although a bit less so in my experience), Malaysia... you get the point.

You must be joking to consider Singapore "third world", much more developed than the US, and the US trend is downward toward third-world status for the majority of its citizens.

Hong Kong only slightly less so, but same about its direction, upwards while the US has already jumped the shark.

If were using GDP per capita (PPP) in constant 2005 dollars, Singapore surpassed the United States sometime between 2003 and 2004, and while the U.S. now has a GDP per capita of $43,063, Singapore has a GDP per capita of $53,266. Not only has Singapore pulled ahead it has pulled far ahead during a period in which growth in U.S. GDP per capita has essentially flatlined U.S. GDP per capita (PPP) in constant 2005 dollars actually peaked in 2007 at $43,635. The Hong Kong Special Administrative Region surpassed the U.S. between 2009 and 2010, and its GDP per capita is now $44,770.

[culicine]

Thank you for posting. I am feeling a little alone and isolated here in Rangsit if you can believe it.

Learn a bit of Thai and the girls will be gagging for it Those teachers are probably fretting over their lesson plans and have no time to chat.

[smotherb]

I live in a large city in the South where most of the falangs are teachers. I have not noted a discernable difference between stuck-up falang teachers and stuck-up anybodies--falang or local. Additionally, I am quite surprised at the number of TV posters who seem to think a casual hello is "weird." I speak or nod my head to anyone, falang or local, who is in my presence and is looking my way. If you do not reciprocate my greeting, I may think you are stuck-up.

If I felt a teacher is stuck-up and it bothered me, I would ask in which school they teach. If they did not respond or ask why I asked, I would simply say I would not want my children to be taught by a stuck-up arse like you.

[aveabeeror2]

They are not stuck up,they are embarrassed and so want to keep isolated. Where as most of us had successful careers and retired here on our investments,they did not,having to work here to make ends meet,or,get a business and have their Thai wives work to provide an income.