How much is enough for the wife's monthly allowance?

[Estrada]

I never understand these posts..!! If you were married in your own country, would you keep all your wages and give your wife an allowance?

I budget a monthly escape fund, stashed in U.K (escape for both of us, in case the country really goes South) and the rest goes into our joint acc as do her wages...

Sounds to me like you are paying to say you are married to a Thai girl and not in a 'marriage' at all...

Yes! None of my wives could look after money.

[GOLDBUGGY]

My Thai sister in law and her husband's joint monthly income is 25k, they have a house, car and 1 child as an example.

An awful lot depends WHERE she is living, if she is running with a Hi-So wannabe pack in Bangkok, then 100k wouldnt cut it,

If she is running with other hookers and partying in Phuket or Pattaya, then no 50k wouldnt cut it, but may make her cut down on clients a little.

If she is a normal girl from a typical Thai town or village, she is taking the piss !

My opinion, no matter what the circumstances, you shouldnt be paying her ANYTHING, she wouldnt have it if you werent there, unless she's on her back, so why should she get it for sod all from you ? Wake up man !

So I gather that from what you are saying to all of us here is that if you were married to a Western Woman, and were a Travelling Salesman, or worked Overseas, you wouldn't give your wife a Cent or Farthing to help support her with the rent, food, power, water, clothes, or any other expenses, when you are away. Or even when you are at home, while you are earning 10 times more money then she could. That is interesting!

Just 2 quick questions before I move on.

1) Have you ever been married before?

2) How many times?

To the OP, if your wife is living with her family then 15,000 THB is enough. That is probably close to an Educated Government Workers Starting Wage in Thailand. Don't know anything about her family or parents. If they own a small rice paddy, or some land, then again this should be enough. Your wife has an obligation to help her parents financially, so you do also, but not all of this responsibility is your obligation. Other family members are expected to help also, if really needed.

If your wife is living separate from her family, perhaps in a house or condo you own in Thailand, then it is also still enough. But you might have to chip in on any major unexpected expense, like a TV or Refrigerator in need of repair or replacement, but not for a sick Water Buffalo or a new roof for Momma & Poppa. If she is renting her own place, then it is not enough. Add the rent money to this allowance or tell her to move back in with her parents.

My Wife lives with me in Thailand, and I pay for food and shelter and obvious things. But I still give my wife an allowance of 10,000 THB a month. From that money she buys personal items like clothes, shoes, purses, and such, which she does not do often. How she divides her allowance money is about 25% goes to her Mother & Father to help support them. Another 25% goes towards her younger brothers education in a finer school. The rest goes into her bank account and in which I have equal access to.

In my view, everyone needs an allowance for there own personal things. I had one myself, while living in the West, as did my now x-wife then, and at that time. My Thai Wife is willing to work and did so for quite sometime, when I was away working But right now I prefer she stays home with me rather then be away working 5-6 days a week and making only 15,000 BHT per month in a Government Office.

[Somsrisonphimai]

คนที่เขามีความรู้เขาไม่พูดกับผู้หญิงแบบนี้หรอกค่ะไม่รู้ว่าจะตอบไปทำไม

I believe she said " there are people that know you don't speak to girls like this. I don't know why you answer like that"

Sorry if I got it wrong

Wow, I am impressed with your translation. What I meant was a well educated person will not talk to a woman like that. I have no reason to respond.

But anyway my English must be good enough that people actually don't think I am Thai girl.

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[Somsrisonphimai]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

This is a laugh - sent by someone who wants more money and thinks all foreigners are wealthy...LOL

An income survey done about 8 years ago stated the Thai average income was 4000 Baht per month, yes, four thousand...

However, in the cities much more is required, so 10k is more reasonable, but your question cannot be answered directly.

In Udon Thani, for example, a city apartment can be found for anywhere from 500 - 10,000 Baht. Locally, one hospital has an apartment wing where studios rent for 6,000 Baht. Meanwhile a small studio in the heart of town rents for 3,000 Baht. Hotels rent from 100 Baht to 3000 Baht per night.

Lastly, has your wife accepted her role to support foreign standards..?? For example, my Mother would rather starve than ask for a penny. On occasion, I do send her money, but she always refers to it as a loan and insists on paying back. We have always believed that to ask for money is insulting and rude, but such begging is common in Thailand.

Thai people always exaggerate their needs - when 1500 Baht will do just fine, they will demand 5000, but because the future is unknowable, budgeting is not well understood. 'The past is gone, the future is unknown, so today is the only time - spend it all'.

My wife once explained the difference; 'give a Thai 100 Baht and they will spend it, but give a foreigner 100 Baht and he puts 50 in a drawer, uses 30 for food and 20 to play'.

One afternoon, my Mother in Law received 1000 Baht for 'household expenses'. Just before noon the following day, she again asked for money. Whe asked where the money had gone, she answered 'I don't know'...

All these ideas are based in a sharing agrarian economy, where, for centuries, nothing was individually owned; oxen (buffalo) shared for plowing, everyone helping to build a house or harvest a field.

No, I don't think all foreigner is wealthy. I just wanted OP to know how much the cost of living in Thailand actually is. If he wants his wife to have the same life style as his when he is in Thailand, then that amount is to be expected.

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[wolfmanjack]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

Come ... declare your hand now!

... written by a nice Thai Lady ...

Mr. David, I'm being realistic here (:

If OP wants to be a good provider to his wife, that number would allow her to have some comfort.

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what your talking about is not being a good provider, it's called being an idiot.

a good provider is a man that is providing a home for him, his wife and children together as a family unit.

what about the duties of a good wife, i am not talking about housework or cooking, im talking about the fact that this man lives overseas and his wife is here and obviously could be working an contributing to the relationship or family assets.

but by the sound of things she is not, he is sending her money to do nothing, all he is providing is a lazy alternative to real life.

and you suggesting that a man should be sending his wife who apparently does nothing 45,000 baht month, in order to be considered a good provider.

if you really are a thai lady, then you are kind of thai lady i don't like.

i grew up here, went to school here, i grew up with plenty of stupid girls at school that used to make comments like "when i am older i will just marry a farang so i don't have to work"

your comments advising idiots to send a lazy thai tart 45,000 baht p/m in order to be a good provider, just fuels the fire.

you say you are thai, well so am i (by nationality) not blood, but i am adopted by thai's, i have full thai nationality and i get embarrassed when i read comments like yours...

thai women with your mindset it a large part of the reason that the average thai woman's international reputation is only one notch above an Al-qaeda terrorist.

I took all of sri's comments as being sarcastic or a joke. Maybe I was wrong but i don't think so.

[whoisyourdaddy]

We allow my wife's niece 25K a month while she's at university up in Khon Kaen which includes digs, books, to run a scoot and a fun, comfortable lifestyle which is what university is all about in spite of what academics seem to think....

When we were deciding/debating this issue I thought 25K excessive for a young single lass not in BKK but better that, than she looking for alternative methods of funding her studies which is the wife's big (huge) fear. I also felt that by not having financial worries would allow her the peace of mind to really hit the books. If she gets bad grades then Uncle HD is going to have to put her across his knee and give her a spanking....

When the wife and I retire (not too far off) she will be the earner of the family (we hope) so will take up the reins of financial responsibility from us, her Uncle and my in-laws, all of who both recently retired so for us we see it as an investment albeit one for the good of the family.

So wrong on so many levels.

So you expect her to support you once you retire?

Clearly i am not as savvy, but my parents supported me even after they retired, so that i can build better life for myself, they certainly did not expect me to waste 1/3 of my life to support them

My kids are supported and will be for as long as needed and i surely will not burden them financially.

This Thai bullshit of kids wasting half of their life supporting the parents is not love but a parasite attitude towards each other.

If its within your means to support her with 25K for her to have good life and education, you should not be "expecting" anything back in return, just happiness she will have better life than you.

I guess i am weird in this regard

[falkan]

Is she working?

My wife earns about 40 000/month, some of which she gives to her parents and sister.

Maybe sit down with your wife and ask her to set out a budget? Don't assume she's blowing it, but help her set up a way that you can both account for it.

I know that mine is very careful with money as we buy and sell a lot of stocks, which she manages. She also keeps receipts of all transactions so that we know what we spend on.

Essentially we manage a budget together.

I have lived in Thailand for over 10 years

and I find you statement that your thai wife makes over 40,000 baht a month a little hard to believe

I know high Bank officers that not make that amount of money

15000 is a good wage for a thai wife

My wife tells me many in her home village would be happy with 8000 baht

seems like you lived in poor issan for 10 years how about bkk or phuket were there is plenty of girls making western salary..

[wolfmanjack]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

This is a laugh - sent by someone who wants more money and thinks all foreigners are wealthy...LOL

An income survey done about 8 years ago stated the Thai average income was 4000 Baht per month, yes, four thousand...

However, in the cities much more is required, so 10k is more reasonable, but your question cannot be answered directly.

In Udon Thani, for example, a city apartment can be found for anywhere from 500 - 10,000 Baht. Locally, one hospital has an apartment wing where studios rent for 6,000 Baht. Meanwhile a small studio in the heart of town rents for 3,000 Baht. Hotels rent from 100 Baht to 3000 Baht per night.

Lastly, has your wife accepted her role to support foreign standards..?? For example, my Mother would rather starve than ask for a penny. On occasion, I do send her money, but she always refers to it as a loan and insists on paying back. We have always believed that to ask for money is insulting and rude, but such begging is common in Thailand.

Thai people always exaggerate their needs - when 1500 Baht will do just fine, they will demand 5000, but because the future is unknowable, budgeting is not well understood. 'The past is gone, the future is unknown, so today is the only time - spend it all'.

My wife once explained the difference; 'give a Thai 100 Baht and they will spend it, but give a foreigner 100 Baht and he puts 50 in a drawer, uses 30 for food and 20 to play'.

One afternoon, my Mother in Law received 1000 Baht for 'household expenses'. Just before noon the following day, she again asked for money. Whe asked where the money had gone, she answered 'I don't know'...

All these ideas are based in a sharing agrarian economy, where, for centuries, nothing was individually owned; oxen (buffalo) shared for plowing, everyone helping to build a house or harvest a field.

No, I don't think all foreigner is wealthy. I just wanted OP to know how much the cost of living in Thailand actually is. If he wants his wife to have the same life style as his when he is in Thailand, then that amount is to be expected.

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After reading this comment now i am not so sure.

Now i have to go with either she is still joking or she is crazy.

[wym]

No perfectly serious and sane.

Her premise is that if she really is his genuine wife, then he would want her to live a lifestyle equivalent to his own even when they are not together.

And if that's what he wants to do and can afford it why not?

The OP didn't give us enough information to go on to judge, so she's just providing the truth about what a western-class - or higher-middle class local - comfortable lifestyle in the more expensive locations costs these days.

Not a cost-effective program for someone just paying for bonks, but perhaps the OP wants to treat his wife as a full sharing partner as women would like to be treated anywhere in the world.

For you and me, that's nuts, but many here obviously disagree.

PS I knew the original Wolfman back in the 70's. . .

Edited February 14, 2014 by wym

[wolfmanjack]

No perfectly serious and sane.

Her premise is that if she really is his genuine wife, then he would want her to live a lifestyle equivalent to his own even when they are not together.

And if that's what he wants to do and can afford it why not?

The OP didn't give us enough information to go on to judge, so she's just providing the truth about what a western-class - or higher-middle class local - comfortable lifestyle in the more expensive locations costs these days.

Not a cost-effective program for someone just paying for bonks, but perhaps the OP wants to treat his wife as a full sharing partner as women would like to be treated anywhere in the world.

For you and me, that's nuts, but many here obviously disagree.

The problem with that is he might be spending 45,000 per month on the both of them. His wife alone would not need the same amount as the both of them together would need.

The saying that 2 can live as cheaply as 1 is bullshit. the only thing that cost the same for 2 as it would for 1 would be the rent and the internet. The electric would be higher, the food costs would be higher, the water would be higher.

Also 5,000 per month for transportation? if she does not have a job a long way from home why would she need that much for transportation?

I agree with you that many here seem to spend quite a bit more but it is not necessary for a woman alone to spend that much and that is what the OP is asking.

[chrisinth]

The below figures are there as an example only, but pretty close to our monthly out-goings, and i would assume a lot of married falangs in Thailand would be around the same, again, a lot not. I live up-country:

House rental: 7,000 Bht
Electricity, utilities & Water: 5,000 Bht
Internet: 1,200 Bht
Sat TV: 1,600 Bht
Car: 11,000 Bht
Car & motorbike running costs: 3,000+ Bht
2 x Siberian huskies: 3,000+ Bht
Food: 12,000 Bht
Family: Apart from some occasional support for son & daughter (both living away from home), nothing.

Total: LOTS

Now, if it came to it and I was working abroad, how much should I be sending home to my wife a month to maintain the life style we have setup?

Everyone is different!!

Myself and a lot of others have asked the OP, if he really wants an answer, to expand on his circumstances which he has chosen not to. Until people know more facts, then he won't get any helpful answers.

Still think its a wind-up thread anyway.............

[wolfmanjack]

PS I knew the original Wolfman back in the 70's. . .

cool. i used to listen to him on the radio when I was a kid. I liked his gravelly voice. Was it like that in real life?

Edited February 14, 2014 by wolfmanjack

[Sayonarax]

Needs money to send home.. aye tell the same about your parents and you need to reduce her allowance by 5,000 because you need it for your family..

Farang Welfare Services.

[wym]

PS I knew the original Wolfman back in the 70's. . .

cool. i used to listen to him on the radio when I was a kid. I liked his gravelly voice. Was it like that in real life?

ya, chainsmoker

[Somsrisonphimai]

No perfectly serious and sane.

Her premise is that if she really is his genuine wife, then he would want her to live a lifestyle equivalent to his own even when they are not together.

And if that's what he wants to do and can afford it why not?

The OP didn't give us enough information to go on to judge, so she's just providing the truth about what a western-class - or higher-middle class local - comfortable lifestyle in the more expensive locations costs these days.

Not a cost-effective program for someone just paying for bonks, but perhaps the OP wants to treat his wife as a full sharing partner as women would like to be treated anywhere in the world.

For you and me, that's nuts, but many here obviously disagree.

The problem with that is he might be spending 45,000 per month on the both of them. His wife alone would not need the same amount as the both of them together would need.

The saying that 2 can live as cheaply as 1 is bullshit. the only thing that cost the same for 2 as it would for 1 would be the rent and the internet. The electric would be higher, the food costs would be higher, the water would be higher.

Also 5,000 per month for transportation? if she does not have a job a long way from home why would she need that much for transportation?

I agree with you that many here seem to spend quite a bit more but it is not necessary for a woman alone to spend that much and that is what the OP is asking.

Round trip plane ticket from Phuket to BKK is approximately 3k+

Living in Thailand is not cheap anymore.

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[wym]

The problem with that is he might be spending 45,000 per month on the both of them. His wife alone would not need the same amount as the both of them together would need.

The saying that 2 can live as cheaply as 1 is bullshit. the only thing that cost the same for 2 as it would for 1 would be the rent and the internet. The electric would be higher, the food costs would be higher, the water would be higher.

Also 5,000 per month for transportation? if she does not have a job a long way from home why would she need that much for transportation?

I agree with you that many here seem to spend quite a bit more but it is not necessary for a woman alone to spend that much and that is what the OP is asking.

Many mia farang wouldn't be caught dead taking public transport.

My ex used to hire a taxi to go between BKK and her beach flat B1,500 each way but didn't contribute more than B6K per month for food for the kids.

But hey it's their money once they've got it to blow how they like.

Gotta love guys talking about girls "squirreling it away in bank accounts" - IF ONLY they were that smart about money, most end up hitting their use-by date without a pot to p1ss in.

[Somsrisonphimai]

No perfectly serious and sane.

Her premise is that if she really is his genuine wife, then he would want her to live a lifestyle equivalent to his own even when they are not together.

And if that's what he wants to do and can afford it why not?

The OP didn't give us enough information to go on to judge, so she's just providing the truth about what a western-class - or higher-middle class local - comfortable lifestyle in the more expensive locations costs these days.

Not a cost-effective program for someone just paying for bonks, but perhaps the OP wants to treat his wife as a full sharing partner as women would like to be treated anywhere in the world.

For you and me, that's nuts, but many here obviously disagree.

PS I knew the original Wolfman back in the 70's. . .

Thanks for explaining so eloquently.

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[speedtripler]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

get a job you freeloader

[Somsrisonphimai]

The problem with that is he might be spending 45,000 per month on the both of them. His wife alone would not need the same amount as the both of them together would need.

The saying that 2 can live as cheaply as 1 is bullshit. the only thing that cost the same for 2 as it would for 1 would be the rent and the internet. The electric would be higher, the food costs would be higher, the water would be higher.

Also 5,000 per month for transportation? if she does not have a job a long way from home why would she need that much for transportation?

I agree with you that many here seem to spend quite a bit more but it is not necessary for a woman alone to spend that much and that is what the OP is asking.

Many mia farang wouldn't be caught dead taking public transport.

My ex used to hire a taxi to go between BKK and her beach flat B1,500 each way but didn't contribute more than B6K per month for food for the kids.

But hey it's their money once they've got it to blow how they like.

Gotta love guys talking about girls "squirreling it away in bank accounts" - IF ONLY they were that smart about money, most end up hitting their use-by date without a pot to p1ss in.

Same with people who don't want to give their wife or GF more 5-10k a month but they have no budget on drinks, golf, and massages.

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[speedtripler]

The problem with that is he might be spending 45,000 per month on the both of them. His wife alone would not need the same amount as the both of them together would need.

The saying that 2 can live as cheaply as 1 is bullshit. the only thing that cost the same for 2 as it would for 1 would be the rent and the internet. The electric would be higher, the food costs would be higher, the water would be higher.

Also 5,000 per month for transportation? if she does not have a job a long way from home why would she need that much for transportation?

I agree with you that many here seem to spend quite a bit more but it is not necessary for a woman alone to spend that much and that is what the OP is asking.

Many mia farang wouldn't be caught dead taking public transport.

My ex used to hire a taxi to go between BKK and her beach flat B1,500 each way but didn't contribute more than B6K per month for food for the kids.

But hey it's their money once they've got it to blow how they like.

Gotta love guys talking about girls "squirreling it away in bank accounts" - IF ONLY they were that smart about money, most end up hitting their use-by date without a pot to p1ss in.

Same with people who don't want to give their wife or GF more 5-10k a month but they have no budget on drinks, golf, and massages.

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why would anyone even want a gf you had to pay ?

in other countries its known as prostitution

[Somsrisonphimai]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

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get a job you freeloader

If that reply is directly toward me, i wish job is not my vocabulary.

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[Khon Thai Ben Khon Dee]

^^ Perhaps they can't get anyone but prostitutes to sleep with them, or pretend to love them.

[wym]

Same with people who don't want to give their wife or GF more 5-10k a month but they have no budget on drinks, golf, and massages.

Many here not least myself treat the SOs in our lives as an optional consumption expense just like those things.

Drinks golf and massages are much easier to keep under control, rarely threaten our own long-term financial sustainability.

Given the fact that many mia farang are dedicated to sucking out every last baht as quickly as possible and then moving on to the next victim, or indeed playing many guys along at a time each of whom think they are the only one, caution is often very much justified.

Not saying anything wrong with it as long as everyone knows what the game is, just some spinners don't play fair, too many guys are just gullible suckers, think just because she's an educated office worker she's different from the Pattay BGs, many are actually far worse.

Edited February 14, 2014 by wym

[speedtripler]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

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get a job you freeloader

If that reply is directly toward me, i wish job is not my vocabulary.

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in thailand a husband or bf is a " career " that should pay 45,000 a month ?

[Somsrisonphimai]

OMG! Have you seen how much things cost in Thailand? The rent, the food, the beauty products, the night out with a friend, the transportation, the family needs, etc. 15,000 baht wont cut it, she needs at least 45,000baht to get by per month.

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get a job you freeloader

If that reply is directly toward me, i wish job is not my vocabulary.

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in thailand a husband or bf is a " career " that should pay 45,000 a month ?

Well, I can tell you this my dad gives all his money to my mom. So, my man's money is my money and my money is my money, 555.

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[Shurup]

Didn't read all 10 pages but, your marriage isn't real if you're paying her or giving her a budget. It's more like a business agreement the way I see it: you pay her monthly and she lets you get into her pants.

The real wife would be interested in preserving family's finances, wouldn't be asking for a budget and you wouldn't need to track her spending.

I have some friends in the same type of marriage as your: wife always "blows" her budget real quick and then asks for more.

The reality is - she transfers most of her budget to her own bank account, saving for the future in case your marriage goes kaput!

[chrisinth]

We allow my wife's niece 25K a month while she's at university up in Khon Kaen which includes digs, books, to run a scoot and a fun, comfortable lifestyle which is what university is all about in spite of what academics seem to think....

When we were deciding/debating this issue I thought 25K excessive for a young single lass not in BKK but better that, than she looking for alternative methods of funding her studies which is the wife's big (huge) fear. I also felt that by not having financial worries would allow her the peace of mind to really hit the books. If she gets bad grades then Uncle HD is going to have to put her across his knee and give her a spanking....

When the wife and I retire (not too far off) she will be the earner of the family (we hope) so will take up the reins of financial responsibility from us, her Uncle and my in-laws, all of who both recently retired so for us we see it as an investment albeit one for the good of the family.

So wrong on so many levels.

So you expect her to support you once you retire?

Clearly i am not as savvy, but my parents supported me even after they retired, so that i can build better life for myself, they certainly did not expect me to waste 1/3 of my life to support them

My kids are supported and will be for as long as needed and i surely will not burden them financially.

This Thai bullshit of kids wasting half of their life supporting the parents is not love but a parasite attitude towards each other.

If its within your means to support her with 25K for her to have good life and education, you should not be "expecting" anything back in return, just happiness she will have better life than you.

I guess i am weird in this regard

If you can't see the reverse of your argument being just as parasitic, your parents supporting you even after they had retired, without a thought of support later, then that is a moot post.

[Somsrisonphimai]

Same with people who don't want to give their wife or GF more 5-10k a month but they have no budget on drinks, golf, and massages.

Many here not least myself treat the SOs in our lives as an optional consumption expense just like those things.

Drinks golf and massages are much easier to keep under control, rarely threaten our own long-term financial sustainability.

Given the fact that many mia farang are dedicated to sucking out every last baht as quickly as possible and then moving on to the next victim, or indeed playing many guys along at a time each of whom think they are the only one, caution is often very much justified.

Not saying anything wrong with it as long as everyone knows what the game is, just some spinners don't play fair, too many guys are just gullible suckers, think just because she's an educated office worker she's different from the Pattay BGs, many are actually far worse.

Yeah, like the so called hi-so girl. It takes a lot to keep up. I have seen many mia farangs trying to keep up with other mia farangs as well. But, if the guys want to give the girl their money, more power to them.

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[Skint]

10-15k is not enough stop being tight.

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[whoisyourdaddy]

We allow my wife's niece 25K a month while she's at university up in Khon Kaen which includes digs, books, to run a scoot and a fun, comfortable lifestyle which is what university is all about in spite of what academics seem to think....

When we were deciding/debating this issue I thought 25K excessive for a young single lass not in BKK but better that, than she looking for alternative methods of funding her studies which is the wife's big (huge) fear. I also felt that by not having financial worries would allow her the peace of mind to really hit the books. If she gets bad grades then Uncle HD is going to have to put her across his knee and give her a spanking....

When the wife and I retire (not too far off) she will be the earner of the family (we hope) so will take up the reins of financial responsibility from us, her Uncle and my in-laws, all of who both recently retired so for us we see it as an investment albeit one for the good of the family.

So wrong on so many levels.

So you expect her to support you once you retire?

Clearly i am not as savvy, but my parents supported me even after they retired, so that i can build better life for myself, they certainly did not expect me to waste 1/3 of my life to support them

My kids are supported and will be for as long as needed and i surely will not burden them financially.

This Thai bullshit of kids wasting half of their life supporting the parents is not love but a parasite attitude towards each other.

If its within your means to support her with 25K for her to have good life and education, you should not be "expecting" anything back in return, just happiness she will have better life than you.

I guess i am weird in this regard

If you can't see the reverse of your argument being just as parasitic, your parents supporting you even after they had retired, without a thought of support later, then that is a moot post.

By support i did not mean giving me money monthly, but giving deposit for the first house or giving start up capital for the business.

They certainly did not ask for any money back once i was on my feet and were glad to see me grow to have more than them and to succeed

Why they did it?because they could afford it, NOT because they were planning for me to support them later.

And when they passed they left me money and things, instead of just debts