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An Ode to Thailand, with apologies to Dorothea Mackellar. Version II

Featured Replies

The love of fields of paddy,
Of dusty concrete lanes.
Of random trees and back yards
Is running in my veins,
Strong love of grey-blue distance
Brown skin and dreamy eyes
Long hair and slim lithe figures,
This land was made for Thais.

I love this Asian country,
A land of sweeping plains,
Of ragged mountain ranges,
Of droughts and flooding plains.
I love her pretty ladies,
I love her jewel-sea,
Her beauty and her terror –
The Land of Smiles for me!

The fake gold Buddha statues
And all the Hoi Polloi,
The go go girls and tuk tuks,
That wait at Soi Cow Boy.
Prime minister in exile,
His sister close to gaol,
While those accused of murder
Are walking free on bail.

Core of my heart, my Thailand!
Her smoke obscured blue sky,
Another bus drives off a cliff,
And thirty people die -
But then we hit the highway,
And drive without a fear
Of hitting motor cycles,
And have a Singha Beer.

Core of my heart, my Thailand!
Land of the Thaksin clan,
Through flood and fire and famine,
They tax us all they can -
No alcohol in Tescos,
Between two and five p.m.,
But got to any local shop
And there buy all you can.

The three month trip to Mae Sai,

A town of ninety thousand-

Most of them illegals

Or selling contraband.

Plus Six ageing male farrangs

With their faithful Thai escort-

Passport and cash in hand

Make their Ninety day report.

An open-hearted country,
A wilful, lawless land -
All you who expect justice,
You will not understand -
There may be better countries but,
Wherever I may die,
I know that, while I live here,
I’ll just say ‘Mai Pen Rai’.

Moved to Farang , expats forum.

Excellent,sums it up perfectly for me,except could you not have found room for something like,'and blowing plastic bags,drifting slowly across the plains'

Long hair and slim lithe figures ...
I love her pretty ladies ...
The go go girls and tuk tuks...
...at Soi Cow Boy.
And have a Singha Beer...
No alcohol in Tescos,
With their faithful Thai escort-

Certainly sums up the cultural interests of the all too typical farang.

With no apologies to Dorothy Parker:

“There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.”
  • Author
Long hair and slim lithe figures ...
I love her pretty ladies ...
The go go girls and tuk tuks...
...at Soi Cow Boy.
And have a Singha Beer...
No alcohol in Tescos,
With their faithful Thai escort-

Certainly sums up the cultural interests of the all too typical farang.

With no apologies to Dorothy Parker:

“There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.”

Thank you for the compliment. It was written to "sum up the cultural interests of the all too typical faring"

I am pleased that it struck a chord with you.

At the risk of "feeding a troll" here is the corrected version: Verse two line 4.

The love of fields of paddy,

Of dusty concrete lanes.

Of random trees and back yards

Is running in my veins,

Strong love of grey-blue distance

Brown skin and dreamy eyes

Long hair and slim lithe figures,

This land was made for Thais.

I love this Asian country,

A land of sweeping plains,

Of ragged mountain ranges,

Of droughts and flooding rains.

I love her pretty ladies,

I love her jewel-sea,

Her beauty and her terror –

The Land of Smiles for me!

The fake gold Buddha statues

And all the Hoi Polloi,

The go go girls and tuk tuks,

That wait at Soi Cow Boy.

Prime minister in exile,

His sister close to gaol,

While those accused of murder

Are walking free on bail.

Core of my heart, my Thailand!

Her smoke obscured blue sky,

Another bus drives off a cliff,

And thirty people die -

But then we hit the highway,

And drive without a fear

Of hitting motor cycles,

And have a Singha Beer.

Core of my heart, my Thailand!

Land of the Thaksin clan,

Through flood and fire and famine,

They tax us all they can -

No alcohol in Tescos,

Between two and five p.m.,

But got to any local shop

And there buy all you can.

The three month trip to Mae Sai,

A town of ninety thousand-

Most of them illegals

Or selling contraband.

Plus Six ageing male farrangs

With their faithful Thai escort-

Passport and cash in hand

Make their Ninety day report.

An open-hearted country,

A wilful, lawless land -

All you who expect justice,

You will not understand -

There may be better countries but,

Wherever I may die,

I know that, while I live here,

I’ll just say ‘Mai Pen Rai’.

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