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The "I've been here longer than you" people.


Deaw

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Most people come to /live in Thailand for the same reason. I truly wonder about all the prejudices on this forum. Newby, old, grumpy, fat, tattoeed, gullible, 1st time visitor, longterm expat, yank, aussie, etc etc etc. All judgemental.

Just follow this, be openminded and you will be much happier.

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So! You are giving advice that people don't need advised.

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Every person has a desire to feel important in the eyes of others - some just don't have anything else to show off than being here longer.

That's true.

I knew an Israeli guy once who'd been here for six months and taught himself to speak and even read the language. He couldn't write it, though.

I've met others who've been here for years and achieved nothing.

Quality not quantity.

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Mmm wonder who has the hang up here - these guys for telling you how long they have lived here, or you for being bothered by it (kind of sounds like penis envy - big guys like to talk about it, small guys with a hang-up get offended, everyone else couldn't are less).

Yeah, but if I tell you how big my penis is when you didn't ask, who is the guy with the hangup?

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The starngest thing is the ones who've been here for years and can barely speak a word of Thai, are still hanging around tourist orientated girlie bars and really know jack shit about Thai culture.

It follows the only way you would know this, is hanging around girlie bars talking to them about how long they have been here.

No, not me. However, you get to meet alll types, when you work for a teacher placement agency.

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Every person has a desire to feel important in the eyes of others - some just don't have anything else to show off than being here longer.

How about the hundreds of ex Special Service guys who have retired to the bars of Thailand. There is a Belgian guy on Samui who tells everybody that he was seconded to the Australian SAS in Viet Nam. My mate , an ex Major, ex Aussie SAS tells me that it is all B/S as they never had foreigners seconded to them in VN.

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Every person has a desire to feel important in the eyes of others - some just don't have anything else to show off than being here longer.

How about the hundreds of ex Special Service guys who have retired to the bars of Thailand. There is a Belgian guy on Samui who tells everybody that he was seconded to the Australian SAS in Viet Nam. My mate , an ex Major, ex Aussie SAS tells me that it is all B/S as they never had foreigners seconded to them in VN.

I'd be inclined to disbelieve both of them.

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I like the ones that brag "I've been here for 2 weeks and let me tell you everything about Thailand" !

They tend to get upset when you call them out on their BS. Then you casually mention that "in the xx years I've lived here......" and smile as they sullenly walk away.

+1

The thing is that they actually realise they're talking to another person doesn't usually hit them until they've reeled off their entire "expat CV" rattled out a few of Stickman's myths, a bit of Bar Girl Thai to impress you and to reinforce their 'local' status. When it does actually hit them they're talking to another person it can be rather fun.

My missus has become attuned to this now and now really enjoys coming up to me and rattling off a long soliloquy in Thai aimed at me (even if half the time I've not a clue what she's rattling on about it sounds good nonetheless) then sits back and enjoys watching the face of the 'expert' when he realises he's been rattling on to someone who may 'out rank' him, using his own criteria for being a "Thailand expert''.

I count myself very lucky that I first came here in a time when no one was a 'bottled Thailand expert' after spending a few weeks on the internet.

I learned the ropes from people who really had put in the hard yards.

The "Old Hands' (there's an expression one hardly hears any more) were treated with reverence and it paid to heed their advice which was never preachy, never patronising, always delivered from an "I made it this far, if you want to do the same, you could do worse than listen to me Son" angle. Some of the best advice I ever got here was from an Old Hand of 30 years who explained Thai office politics to me brilliantly and helped me iron out some of the early wobbles I had to my working life recently. I was delighted to hear he is still with us (in every sense) and can still be found dispensing wisdom albeit in the quieter environs of Isaan.

The only written references for expats then (and I'm not going back too far) were a handful of books (like Denis Segaller's, Carol Hollinger and the Culture Shock series) plus the odd column in the BKK Post like Trink, Nobby (or similar) or the occasional public speaking by one of the above people at the FCCT (or similar) or them annoying 'funnies" on the bog walls of the bars like 'You know you've been in Thailand too long"......etc

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While I understand the OPs annoyance, I've learned to tolerate, ignore and live life on life's terms. I live here long term and chat all the time with visitors, never forgetting that I am a long term visitor and not a member of a special class.

I've met people that have lived in Thialand for 20 years and have essentially learned nothing about the language, culture and customs of the land. Then again, there are others that have been here a much shorter time that have embraced their new home with a open and inquisitive mind.

There is a lot to be annoyed by in this world and they consume precious time and resources if I allow them to do so. I try to concentrate on the positive, the beautiful and the productive aspects of my life. I'm much happier and less "annoyed" with life.

Easy Does It.

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Reading this thread I realise I just don't get out very much socially, not anymore. Work takes me to industrial estates where most of the expats are rotated every few years, or have been here for a while; the conversation rarely gets to length of servitude here. I posit it's a steeper learning curve working here, more exposure to a wider range of what makes Thailand tick.

Personally I did not move here to engage in conversations with people who are not terribly different from those I left behind. I spend much of my time speaking Thai, and in situations where I am the only non-Thai. I rarely broadcast to strangers that I've been here a considerable while, speak Thai, or what I do for a living. That being said, I will help out if someone genuinely needs it, but in a world of Google and phones with maps, that is less of an issue. Perhaps selfishly, I consider talking to tourists of little value to me (where talking ≠ helping.)

Anyhow, I've found most people who need to ask you "How long..." have not been around very long. Not that it matters very much...

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Every person has a desire to feel important in the eyes of others - some just don't have anything else to show off than being here longer.

I've not talked to "every person" , so I can't say the same thing with any degree of confidence.
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The starngest thing is the ones who've been here for years and can barely speak a word of Thai, are still hanging around tourist orientated girlie bars and really know jack shit about Thai culture.

I prefer to assimilate and learn from my adopted country, regardless of where it is.

As for those that hang around bars, etc., it's a strange thing called choice and freedom. They live their lives, I live mine. I try not to take their inventory and I'm all the happier for it.

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The starngest thing is the ones who've been here for years and can barely speak a word of Thai, are still hanging around tourist orientated girlie bars and really know jack shit about Thai culture.

I prefer to assimilate and learn from my adopted country, regardless of where it is.

As for those that hang around bars, etc., it's a strange thing called choice and freedom. They live their lives, I live mine. I try not to take their inventory and I'm all the happier for it.

somchaismith is jealous coz he cant afford to goto the bar and resorts to a bottle of thai whisky with the street zombies.

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you should try Australia, as an Aussie I have worked and lived in many country towns where if you are not 4th or 5th generation from that area you are simply a blow in that's good for nothing but a punching bag at the local watering hole. Anyway, it's been my experience that most americans want to feel important wherever they are!

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you should try Australia, as an Aussie I have worked and lived in many country towns where if you are not 4th or 5th generation from that area you are simply a blow in that's good for nothing but a punching bag at the local watering hole. Anyway, it's been my experience that most americans want to feel important wherever they are!

oz is all inbred especially tazzy and the south coast .

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Hey, nice post - glad to see that you don't have any problems… It is an obnoxious brag - as if you didn't xist during the time they were here. Surely you must have been somewhere, doing something.. but people can be obnoxious no matter how long or short a time they have spent here. I always get a kick out of people here who like to say "same same" as if they are speaking Thai…

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I can't understand guys who have been here for years and can't hold a basic conversation in thai.

Live in a back village and are dying to speak English with a fallang.

Why did you build a house miles away from the main town ?

And then moan about their Internet connection

Maybe watched too much.

Escape to the country on BBC

And yet take a somalli asylum seekers in the UK within a year he's got the hang of English.

The 2 languages are not the same admittedly. But not impossible.

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

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The ironic thing is most of these people you speak of,I've met them first hand also,speak hardly any Thai and despise the place,hang on this could be your average TV member.

I completely agree with the OP and their views about this subject and especially the so called "VETS" that don't speak a damn word of the language.

There is absolutely no excuse at all. Period. And the ones with the "because I choose NOT to learn" have no excuse either. Just hypocrites.

And the reason why I call them hypocrites is because of this main reason:

They expect YOU to learn their language when you live in their country.

And you can bet your boobies they commented on that or have at the very least, thought about it when they came across a foreigner living in their country for 15+ years.

That goes for language teachers as well. If you take the time to learn THEIR language, it will go a long ways. It puts you in their shoes and makes you a better teacher.

I could not have survived in Japan my 17 years there nor Hong Kong 8 years [sarcasm] yep, that's right you vets, 17 years in Japan. I guess that makes me someone special like you[\sarcasm] without cracking open the books and studying the language.

I just finished 8 months in Thailand with an ED visa and am grateful that I did.

The attitude of the native people, where ever you live in the world, changes drastically towards you when you make some attempt to learn their language.

And why not? You DO expect the same from them in your home country.

Why you ask? Because it shows them respect. It shows you put time and effort to learn about them and their unique culture(s).

I remember buying my curry and fried fish from some shop owners at the open market. The first few months not knowing the language, they just served me. No smile. "Another Farang who doesn't speak Thai" attitude.

Months later with some conversation skills under my belt, those same people were not only serving me extra food but were engaging in small talk and giving a real Thai smile.

The so called "Vets" can kiss my butt. I've been in Asia for 25 years and loving it.

And I've got Japanese, Cantonese and Thai to put in my resume.

So, Mr. Vet, what did you accomplish in all those years except to grow a festering attitude on your shoulder and copious amounts of Chang/Leo?

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