Unfriendly Farangs

[louse1953]

I don't really want anything to do with any westerner, and I would much prefer I were the only one here.

I'm polite and mumble something back, then I look the other way.

Yet you are on Thai Visa.

[PDavies]

Sure but you guys are just words on a screen. There's no BO, beer guts, comb-overs. If you annoy me I can close this window whenever I like and compound you to the realms of deep cyberspace.

[Tchooptip]

In my culture whenever one enters a lift one looks at everyone in the eye and says hello and everyone says hello back.

The same when we enter a room in a public place. The rules of politeness are very strict and almost everyone respects them.

When I first arrived in Thailand I did the same as I would in my culture and this caused me years of misery.

I know someone will insult me for saying this but I will say it all the same:

There are so many farrang pedophiles, cheap whore chasers, drunks, fakes, perverts and the mentally ill I avoid contact with any foreigner until i know who/what they are.

My ex wife and I knew a very nice, cultured British gentleman. He seemed to be the best of people so we wondered why he would take such a pay cut to work in Thailand when he had such a successful life in Britain.

One night we stopped for a late dinner at an all night restaurant in Siam Square and in the corner, in the dark was this man and he was being intimate with a 16 year old boy. We then understood why he was here.

There have been so many disappointments, so many times stabbed in the back, so much pain that I finally accepted to do what most other Europeans do here and not make contact until I know enough about the other farrang.

All those who like to pretend that all is perfect here may now feel free to throw their insults.

.

Jus curious. How on earth did you and or your wife know the boy was 16?

Simply amazing.

But good for you and the ex wife!

I love TV professional hairsplitters ... Normally anyone would have understood "in his sixteenth" and understood the OP meanings...

...but difficult when quibbling is a pathology

Simply amazing same same!

[louse1953]

Steve....I'm with you man....I've noticed the same thing about foreigners here in Thailand. I don't understand the issue with them. In my opinion, most of the foreigners have come to thailand to escape their own kind because of 'bad experiences back home'. This is my theory and actually it was also part of the reason that I ended up in Thailand (to get away from my own countrymen, government, backstabbers, exploiters, and other sponging-races that are sucking the life out of my former country). Being in Thailand, I had no interest in "getting chummy" with other foreigners, although I would not turn down a friendly offer to have a good chat....but obviously most foreigners that I run accross....aren't interested in even a simple "hello".

I agree with your post.

Karma works in strange ways,your former country sucks new immigrants former country dry,now they return the favour.Som nam nar.

[Mango Bob]

Is it so hard to nod your head or say hello when passing other human being. Something serious wrong with the many of the people on this forum. More hate here behind the computer screen. Most of you should be ashamed of yourself.

[kranuan]

Is it so hard to nod your head or say hello when passing other human being. Something serious wrong with the many of the people on this forum. More hate here behind the computer screen. Most of you should be ashamed of yourself.

+1 .... im with you all the way on that my man

[DaveinAsia]

Ah ! The Miserable Git Brigade. Seems to be rather large numbers of them here. Karma gets 'em in the end though; we had one in our village who would never speak a word to anyone and suddenly he got very ill and went into Hospital....nobody except his wife visited him. He then died and his wife had to go around begging the neighbours to go to his funeral because there were no mourners.

Thats a typical British comment to make. Just because some guy decided to live a different lifestyle than yours(hanging in the bars, watching tv, living a pretty useless life)he is a miserable git. Maybe the guy had a very lively life before surrounded by lots of people and he became fed up with it after 50 years and just wanted some peace and quiet. Why do halfwits never try to put themselves in someone elses shoes? If they are not the same as you then they are categorized as weirdo's, freaks, miserable, etc. You could've tried approaching him whilst you lived in the same village and asked him what his story was. So blame yourself too trainman.

About the gym guys not being polite; sounds familiar. The gym can have that effect on certain individuals. They are only focused on working out and that's why they visit the gym, not to socialise. For that they go to the gay sauna's Just kidding mate. Gyms are so unnatural anyway. I recommend to stay away from them. Go for a run in the park, it's free.

[ChoakMyDee]

LOL at the grumpy old bastards that can't spare a smile or a "hello" in passing.

The needy losers who get upset when a stranger isn't interested in them are funnier.

Haha, you're a sad case thinking a friendly stranger is "needy".

[The Usual Suspect]

I get that all the time here even though I am in areas where there aren't too many foriegners. My hygiene is fine, motives are friendly. Sometimes I think these blokes moved here to isolate, or maybe they are so paranoid that they won't even offer a response for fear of being (insert reason). As far as I'm concerned, fok you, have a nice day.

[Soutpeel]

After living here for many years I have learned to be wary of any strangers Thai or farang.

It has been my experience that there are some real Loonies out there.

Allow me to put another spin on this, I have spent the last 30 years working in many countries where there are "expats" around and Thailand is certainly the top of list in the number of loonie foreigners I have come across

[stoneyboy]

So the majority of Thai Visa members are scared to acknowledge other foreigners here for fear of them being kiddy fiddlers,sex tourists,visa abusers or on the bones of their arse,surely it would be easier to live elsewhere where these people are less in abundance.

Really says a lot about the expat population here.

[buhi]

Is this a man thing?

I would be very uncomfortable in a locker room, why I have never been in one except long ago in England at swimming pools.

Some one mentioned earlier, that is like opening a conversation at a urinal.

Now out there, walking down a street, shopping, whatever, am I meant to say Hi to a person because he is a farang. Now if I said Hi to a woman because she is a farang would it be a different issue?

I admit I prefer female company regardless of race, so even in a bar I will talk to the "girls", but make it quite clear I am not interested in anything else!

Where I live I am the only farang and my pet hate is Thai ( always men), who have limited English skills trying,no forcing me, into a conversation that I am not the least interested in having.

It begins with, " Where are you from?" and then an interrogation.

Those that know me, we chat about small time things and it does not go further than that.

[somchaismith]

^ Actually, most gays are usually quite particular about their hygiene.

Talking from your own personal experiences then

You're obviously not in Thailand then, if you haven't seen how well ladyboys themselves.

[monkeycountry]

In my culture whenever one enters a lift one looks at everyone in the eye and says hello and everyone says hello back.

The same when we enter a room in a public place. The rules of politeness are very strict and almost everyone respects them.

When I first arrived in Thailand I did the same as I would in my culture and this caused me years of misery.

I know someone will insult me for saying this but I will say it all the same:

There are so many farrang pedophiles, cheap whore chasers, drunks, fakes, perverts and the mentally ill I avoid contact with any foreigner until i know who/what they are.

My ex wife and I knew a very nice, cultured British gentleman. He seemed to be the best of people so we wondered why he would take such a pay cut to work in Thailand when he had such a successful life in Britain.

One night we stopped for a late dinner at an all night restaurant in Siam Square and in the corner, in the dark was this man and he was being intimate with a 16 year old boy. We then understood why he was here.

There have been so many disappointments, so many times stabbed in the back, so much pain that I finally accepted to do what most other Europeans do here and not make contact until I know enough about the other farrang.

All those who like to pretend that all is perfect here may now feel free to throw their insults.

My god that would freak me out. What culture says hello to everyone in the elevator?

Well, it gets even worse, I understand from another thread that in healthbkkbkk's culture it is customary to hug and kiss people you have never met before too :-D

[sirchai]

In the gym today I had the locker next to a farang again he avoided eye contact I even said "how are you". Nothing................. as if I wasn't even there.

Maybe he thought you wanted to "date" him?

[monkeycountry]

In my culture whenever one enters a lift one looks at everyone in the eye and says hello and everyone says hello back.

The same when we enter a room in a public place. The rules of politeness are very strict and almost everyone respects them.

When I first arrived in Thailand I did the same as I would in my culture and this caused me years of misery.

I know someone will insult me for saying this but I will say it all the same:

There are so many farrang pedophiles, cheap whore chasers, drunks, fakes, perverts and the mentally ill I avoid contact with any foreigner until i know who/what they are.

My ex wife and I knew a very nice, cultured British gentleman. He seemed to be the best of people so we wondered why he would take such a pay cut to work in Thailand when he had such a successful life in Britain.

One night we stopped for a late dinner at an all night restaurant in Siam Square and in the corner, in the dark was this man and he was being intimate with a 16 year old boy. We then understood why he was here.

There have been so many disappointments, so many times stabbed in the back, so much pain that I finally accepted to do what most other Europeans do here and not make contact until I know enough about the other farrang.

All those who like to pretend that all is perfect here may now feel free to throw their insults.

.

Jus curious. How on earth did you and or your wife know the boy was 16?

Simply amazing.

But good for you and the ex wife!

What's amazing is someone like you making ridiculous comments without realizing it.

16 was a polite way to say a young boy, under aged, illegal, unacceptable and impossible to get away with in London.

Maybe he was 13? You happy?

Simply amazing but I knew someone like you would come up with an insult which begs to wonder about your attitudes towards "boys". Would you like to explain your norms?

I personally think that Men and Boys should not be intimate with each other. I know that this somehow makes me an intolerant fascist but hey, that's the way I am.

As such conduct is illegal in Thailand I don't feel the need to apologize to anyone for my condemnation of his behavior.

Now please explain your tolerant views on the subject.

.

I'm going to politely answer you friend.

I merely asked you a question and I get something incredible back.

Your comment about age already implied someone did something inappropriate. I suspect you are not an expert on age verification in Southeast Asia. Is that true?

Please refrain from assertions which are unfounded as you just made toward me regarding age tolerance. Completely amazing!

You know nothing about me and we'll keep it like that. I'm finished with anything further you have to say. Remember if you speak loudly everybody knows how truly ignorant you really are. 555

You kidding, right?

Do you really think making this last post somehow erases what you said to mine?

Your comments are there for anyone to see.

I don't accept apologists for pedophiles and I don't care what anyone has to say about that.

If you don't want your position to be questioned then don't make rude replies to posts made by other members and then pretend to be the victim.

It's the farrangs like you that make me cautious about other farrangs here. I do not want to enter a conversation with someone and then hear them give an apologist's view on pedophilia. That has happened to me too many times for me to ever want to hear it again. I'm not saying you're a bad man but I don't want to spend my time discussing pedophiles or the rights and wrongs of the subject.

If you really think that a 60 year old top tier executive could make out with an under aged boy in a restaurant in London and get away with it what can I possibly say to change your mind?

What do you think it is about you that makes so many people approach you and start debating paedophilia? :-)

[je777je]

When, or if I get up and accidentally open my eyes in front of a mirror I ask, good grief why would anyone even want to say Hi.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Is it so hard to nod your head or say hello when passing other human being. Something serious wrong with the many of the people on this forum. More hate here behind the computer screen. Most of you should be ashamed of yourself.

+1 .... im with you all the way on that my man

If someone talks to you purely based on the color of your skin, that makes them a racist.

I don't want to speak to racists.

If someone talks to everyone they pass in the street, that makes them a crazy.

I don't want to speak to crazy people.

[monkeycountry]

One night we stopped for a late dinner at an all night restaurant in Siam Square and in the corner, in the dark was this man and he was being intimate with a 16 year old boy. We then understood why he was here.

Going off-topic, but 16 is the legal age of consent in the UK for gays and I believe it is 15 for Thailand (if not prostitution).

having sex with a child under 18 is a compoundable offense even with the consent of that person. The parent or the child may file charges against the other side if he or she later regrets his or her own action. This ostensibly makes the Thai unfettered age of consent 18.

Did you miss the point about social acceptance and his role in british societe?

Please explain why you concentrate on the pedophile example? As Mel would say:" Do you have a dog in this fight"?

I consider myself a Man and a Man will never lower his eyes to a pedophile or pretend he doesn't see.

The age of consent in Thailand is 15.

Paedophilia is a sexual interest in a child who has not yet reached puberty, which is generally around 12-13 years of age but obviously varies.

The age of consent and the age of puberty has nothing to do with eachother, therefore paedophilia and the age of consent are also not related.

Since you are a man, and don't just look the other way when you see paedophiles in action, did you then do anything about the "paedophile" with the 16yo boy you mentioned in the beginning? :-D

Edited May 5, 2014 by monkeycountry

[Donnie Brasco]

There's another massively significant factor in play here regarding friendship, its authenticity and its longevity.

I can't quite remember who said this but "What was life," asked one Elizabethan commentator "but a series of humiations, large and small . . . . and, in the end, what was a man's measure other than how he chose to deal with these humiliations ?".

If one has known, known of, made acquaintance with, befriended, hung out with, partied with, done business with, attended the wedding of or otherwise associated with another person here for any meaningful length of time one will be aware of this man's triumphs (OF COURSE !!, right?) and this man's humiliations (but, um, certainly not firsthand . . . . . At least if he can help it ;-)

Men, especially men who wash up in Thailand are aware that the aura of triumph and accomplishment in their lives is short-lived . . . . but they are also aware that their humiliations and defeats tend to live forever in their contemporaries' hearts and minds.

If you are witness to a friend's failure, his humiliation, his weaknesses or you know enough to disprove the stated or implied persona he choses to project here in the "land of re-do's" . . . . . . . the friendship is doomed.

All feelings of respect and commonality . . . . . any thread of fellowship or camaraderie that existed will either be consumed in the fires of your friend's humiliation or canibilized by his frantic efforts to HIDE the extent of his folly.

Weak, untested men prefer NOT to be known for their failures and their humiliations.

So, if you are a mindful friend you will be deemed disposable.

In fact, as testimony to his humiliation, you MUST be disposed of.

It's the next best thing to confronting the source of humiliation head on.

The alternative ie acceptance of his awareness that your humiliating life as a lie and having the utter degradation of your plight confirmed every time you see him is never an option.

In Thailand, the source of this humiliation is by far most commonly at the hands of a cheating or otherwise conniving or larcenous wife. Yes, yes. Failure takes many forms. But NOTHING quite compares with the public spectacle of one's "exceptional" wife marching her gig through the office tower where you work. . . . . Or where she works. Or where the seriality of her infidelity and your HUMILIATION is on display for all to see.

You may have attended their wedding. He may have tried to exact acknowledgement and confirmation from you of his "hot wife" hot wife as "one of the good ones". But should you stumble upon confirmation that she is little other than a total ditch-pig, an utter trollop who will do ANY man she pleases and should your friend know that YOU know . . . . The friendship is done.

In the Land of Smiles, personal deception reigns supreme.

Evidence and testimony to a person's humiliation and degradation cannot be tolerated.

Like a ceiling lizard or a kitchen insect your erstwhile buddy will quickly seek out fellowship with the like-minded.

Soon all vestiges of superego are gone, followed by all filters. You'll start hearing that he's trash-talking you. If he's lucky, he'll soon be another lump in the dust.

Rapid decent into alcoholism, profligacy and ill-health will follow because there's no shortage of birds of THAT particular expat plumage.

I have been through FIVE of these. . . . FIVE.

And this is why I tend to remain very, VERY careful around those I meet over here.

G'head. Let's here it from all the peckerheads who are bound to opine that I am too judgemental.

"Sometimes, 'fuggedabowdit' just means fuggedabowdit. . . . "

[docspinoff]

I agree with the op post . and by all the comments .this explains why falangs are the way they are .

stuck in their own little world surrounded by sleeze

[docspinoff]

i agree totally with the op post . and judging by all the comments .i see why falangs are so unfriendly .stuck in there own world surrounded by sleeze

some flalangs are in thailand because the like thailand .

[Soutpeel]

I agree with the op post . and by all the comments .this explains why falangs are the way they are .

stuck in their own little world surrounded by sleeze

Speak for your for yourself dear boy, you may surround yourself with sleeze but not every farang is a whoremunger

[Kerryd]

After living here for many years I have learned to be wary of any strangers Thai or farang.

It has been my experience that there are some real Loonies out there.

Allow me to put another spin on this, I have spent the last 30 years working in many countries where there are "expats" around and Thailand is certainly the top of list in the number of loonie foreigners I have come across

True dat !

I've been working in Asscrackistan for over 10 years now and in that time have seen a few "loonies". You'd think that anyone that willingly works in an active war zone has to be a bit off his (or her) rocker to begin with, but for the most part they are all pretty reasonable people. Seems the majority are married and have families (hmmmmmmmmm - sensing a correlation perhaps ? ).

But Thailand ? Especially in the "touristy" areas ? Holey Crap-a-moley ! Every second person you run into is "ex-special something" and wants you to know that (just in case you were thinking about attacking him for no reason or something).

One in four is a sob story (the dog left me, took ma kids, the truck and the wife with him. Damn I miss my truck.)

One in ten is your regular, run of the mill introvert that isn't a social creature in any sense of the word (I ain't doin' nuttin' wrong and it's still none of yer gol dern business, ya hear ?").

One in twenty is probably an average, everyday kind of guy. Maybe a bit shy after numerous encounters with some of the above, but in a different setting who knows ?

How's my math so far ? What about the other 10% you ask ?

They may be non-English speakers from places where being social to complete strangers can get you "disappeared" to a gulag (or being made the star of your very own, short-lived, video). I know a lot of east-Euros (Romanians, Bulgarians, Bosnians, Turks, etc) that come off as sullen and unapproachable, but within their own clique are very outgoing, happy people.

Some of those other 10%ers could also be the ones you really wouldn't want to associate with anyways for various reasons. Maybe they have something to hide. Maybe they have a pretty good idea already that you and them would have nothing in common. Being social and "outgoing" could actually be detrimental to them, but they can't stay cooped up in a room all day so they have to have go into the public now and then, perhaps somewhat unwillingly.

And then there are those that once you open that door a wee little crack, you just can't get rid of them ! They'll talk your ear off 24/7 about any old thing just to hear the sound of a "friendly" voice (even if it's their own !). You find you can't get away from them. They're at your favourite bar(s). They're phoning/texting. They're knocking at your door.

Nice people, not asking for anything, but just won't shut up !!

(I pretty much fall into the run-of-the mill introvert category, especially in public situations.)

[susan d]

Maybe should start with smile and say nothing.

[monkeycountry]

.

I keep reading that a response to a simple "Hello" "How you doin' ?" "What's up?" "Good morning", often results in an unpleasant encounter.

Guys: You have to have the social graces to extricate yourselves from these situations. I realize they make your guts churn and your knee jerk but that happens a lot in life and sometimes you can't run away.

I have a friend who is totally grossed out by khatouey. He will actually run from them/cross the street to avoid them. The giant horsey faced ones with the gobs of make-up practically cause a panic attack. In effect, they run his life. He lives way up country so he only sees them when he comes to BKK for shopping, thank heavens. I, on the other hand, find them a good laff and, if you joke with them a little in a way that says "no", they quickly move on to greener pastures.

I only told that story to illustrate that ---> There are ways to deal with khatouey, even pushy ones, and not lose your cool. They are an extreme end of the spectrum but it can be done.

There are ways to deal with strangers who's offer of a greeting turns into an agenda. Figure some out that work for you. as in "This is a real coincidence. My buffalo is sick, too."

Don't be afraid! Give people a chance to be nice.

'nuff said

~

I also run away from katoeys and other types of thieves and pickpockets.

I know not all katoeys are pickpockets. Unfortunately the 98% that are, ruin it for the rest :-)

Edited May 5, 2014 by monkeycountry

[AnotherOneAmerican]

One in four is a sob story (the dog left me, took ma kids, the truck and the wife with him. Damn I miss my truck.)

One in ten is your regular, run of the mill introvert that isn't a social creature in any sense of the word (I ain't doin' nuttin' wrong and it's still none of yer gol dern business, ya hear ?").

I've been involved in 100s of your 'sob stories' (in a professional capacity).

It isn't a '1 in 4' event, it's an 'if you both live long enough' event.

Can't see any reason to avoid a guy that it's already happened to.

Can understand those who wish to avoid guys currently in the process.

Edited May 5, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[mrfaroukh]

You are lucky he does not reply to you and just ignore you. I have been even insulted by few Farangs for no reason. By the way which gym are you going to, If i know you I make sure to great you first.

[jmacken306]

I'm from the USA, almost three years now, live 2-3 blocks from Big C, Aomyai, I get mixed thoughts and reactions. All the Farang's, be it Aussie or what ever 9 out of 10 return a HI! Visiting malls like Seacon, The Mall etc I or my wife will hear, Mommy Farang. I make a happy face at all the young kids, they either smile or will turn their head, how should one take that???? What is wrong with a Farang?? I didn't do anything wrong, just a smile. I have at it where a young one wanted to shake my hand, a son with his Thai Dad in Big C, asks, you come and fish in English, I said no..... The only problem I have is the Scooters even the Police, Riding the sidewalk built for people and they ride them like they own it, beep beep my Ahole! and even the wrong way on the streets.... In the USA, humans are given the rights above any motorized vehicles then Bikes! They have brakes, A/C (they can wait)........I can't harm them with my body, but they can KILL US!

Edited May 5, 2014 by jmacken306

[thailiketoo]

I also run away from katoeys and other types of thieves and pickpockets.

I know not all katoeys are pickpockets. Unfortunately the 98% that are, ruin it for the rest :-)

Reverse it and you get right. 98% don't work the street and pickpocket people. Teaching in Thailand I saw many child Kathoeys in school. I guarantee you they didn't go around picking the other children's pockets. NIce kids and usually the best students.