When to just let it go when a Thai tries to make you look stupid

[Berkshire]

Considering that OP has no clue what was said, which OP confirmed, what is the point of this thread?

That many Thai men hate us and act like 12 year olds in front of their mates to put us down?

I thought it was all smiley happy people and Buddhist temples, so this is in fact a revelation.

What?? Pralaad is correct. The OP concedes that he has no idea what the guy said. No freakin idea. Not a clue. How you can arrive at the conclusion that "Thai men hate us" is beyond ridiculous.

[Rockhopper]

I would say thank you in Thai (thank you! kɔ̀ɔp-​kun or thank you! (to peers and inferiors) kɔ̀ɔp-​jai) loud as I could back to him and move along.

[wandasloan]

@EBLair48 . So let's say it wasn't easy to 'suddenly disappear' or end up dead in Thailand, what would you do if you were being openly disrespected and it involved them talking rudely about you and a friend

@Ulysses, I may have misunderstood him it's true. But if I didn't, I surely did nothing to bring it on. I was walking along minding my own business.

@rgs, She is a non-Thai teacher who teaches 60km away from here. A friend who's been out and about this town perhaps 3 or 4 times with me.

Yes, perhaps I misunderstood.

Let me rephrase the question so there's no confusion or we pick apart the situation in 100 ways.

Assume for sure you know he's talking badly about you and a female friend. Maybe not terribly.....But where I come from we call it 'catching rec', or 'gaming on someone'. Basically jesting at someone else's expense and speaking loudly enough so that anyone within 50 meters can hear it. And this person is no friend of yours. What do you do?

Tell us what answer you want readers to give you, and someone will give it to you and make your day.

You want to know how to act when a person says something, but you don't know what he said. I'm not clear why that is supposed to be a serious question.

As for your hypothetical question, you again have no idea what the person said. The reaction has to be based on what was said, surely? What is "talking badly"?

In 99% of cases, *I* hear nothing, do nothing. In 1% of cases, I do something. I know the 1% as soon as I hear it and I instantly know the correct response. My own suggestion is that if you don't know, then in 100% of cases, do and saying nothing at all.

.

[belg]

who cares what a lowlife with no education has to say about you or anybody in the first place ?

[Pralaad]

Considering that OP has no clue what was said, which OP confirmed, what is the point of this thread?

OP had an unpleasant experience and wishes to share it. You need not know a language to sense hostility or aggression.

What is the point of posts that ask 'what is the point?' If you cannot find a point in a thread, what is the point on commenting?

Would it not be best, and within theespirit of the forum- for- all philosophy, instead of trying to diminish the OP, to simply refrain from comment?

OP has no clue what he had. He did not understand what was said and has no idea what the loud talk was all about. For all you know guy was talking about his wife with another guy while OP passed.

I can see you enjoy posting rubbish about Thailand just because you see it that way.

Not all see it one sided, some have enough ability's to appreciate the good, along with the bad.

What exactly are you commenting on?? About a guy speaking loud??? Yet you commenting on something without a single clue what the conversation was and to whom it was directed.

Edited May 22, 2014 by Pralaad

[ggt]

Thais think we look stupid...without trying to makes us so...this dumbass...at the market...was insulting your lady friend...best to just move on and not get into a shouting match with an ignoramus...

[ARISTIDE]

So you don't know what they were saying... I suggest you bring a Thai friend and ask him what they were talking about you. Most Thais are not the bully type may be it's something else not intended to make you look stupid.

I'm not sure what exactly he said, but it he was speaking extremely loudly and wanting to be heard

[Sandman77]

Market seller often talks loud

Mostly then when someone come and take there business away, or sale something cheaper !

[ARISTIDE]

But he didn't even had a clue what they were saying.. it's all in his head for a start..

Thais think we look stupid...without trying to makes us so...this dumbass...at the market...was insulting your lady friend...best to just move on and not get into a shouting match with an ignoramus...

[tubby johnson]

It's best to catch loudmouths off guard with a simple question like: "tummai marayat baeb nee? krai sorn?"

It's extremely humiliating but it shuts them up and focuses the attention of bystanders onto his poor manners and upbringing.

That question boils down to: "Did your parents not teach you manners?" ... The implication here is that he's a thug from a low-class family.

[kennypowers]

I used to get paranoid about this when I couldn't understand Thai. When you can, you realise that the majority of comments are harmless, and in most cases complimentary. Whether the workplace or the moobaan, Thais have a running stream of humour between anyone and everyone in the vicinity. Just learn some Thai and join in the fun.

[kennypowers]

It's best to catch loudmouths off guard with a simple question like: "tummai marayat baeb nee? krai sorn?"

It's extremely humiliating but it shuts them up and focuses the attention of bystanders onto his poor manners and upbringing.

That question boils down to: "Did your parents not teach you manners?" ... The implication here is that he's a thug from a low-class family.

That would be, "Why are your manners like this. Who taught?".

The correct phrase to include the parents element would be, Por, mare, mai sorn marayat rhuu ngai khrub? (Didn't your mum and dad teach you any manners?).

I would definitely not say either of these things to a Thai, unless you want your head kicked in.

[realenglish1]

It can be a friendly gesture . I speak Thai and sometimes they want to show they are friends with you by showing others

I would not make much of it since he was speaking Thai and not trying to insult you in English

[tubby johnson]

It's best to catch loudmouths off guard with a simple question like: "tummai marayat baeb nee? krai sorn?"

It's extremely humiliating but it shuts them up and focuses the attention of bystanders onto his poor manners and upbringing.

That question boils down to: "Did your parents not teach you manners?" ... The implication here is that he's a thug from a low-class family.

That would be, "Why are your manners like this. Who taught?".

The correct phrase to include the parents element would be, Por, mare, mai sorn marayat rhuu ngai khrub? (Didn't your mum and dad teach you any manners?).

I would definitely not say either of these things to a Thai, unless you want your head kicked in.

That's too direct a question. "Krai sorn?" will bounce around a bit longer inside his slow, thick skull.

He'll wonder how a farang can understand Thai and return the insult so swiftly, why he lost face, how he intended to be the bully and get the bystanders on his side, why that farang won't stop staring at him, where it all went wrong for him. Thais are cowards and without the support of bystanders they can't act alone, no initiative outside the herd.

[bermondburi]

You used the word "market" not me, its known as pasat talat.

The language you hear used you wont hear on the news or in formal speech.

Many times I have been to the market and the language and humour used is something my mrs gets embarrassed with, not with the language used, but she doesnt want me to repeat it for fear of another Thai hearing me and thinking my mrs taught me this language.

Examples include, tee lang ma kon diaw, chai krap ma gap mia mai sanook.

Another time I was wanting to buy matsam paste, the girl wasnt at her stall, I asked the girl at the next stall (who I knew and she knew me), tammai wan nee ee khao mai ma, bursts of hysterical laughter (the girl is as black as the ace of spades) from the girl I asked, some old yai was pissing herself cackling away ee khao arai wa, some young girl couldnt understand and once it was explained she also burst into laughter.

Unless you are fluent (I am not) best to forget it.

Is that it!!! not exactly turning the air blue! Should try a market in SE London.

[DLock]

Thais will sometimes do this, in Thai, on the assumption you cannot understand what they are saying.

In that instance, stop, look directly at them and say , with an incredulous look on your face "Thamai mai supob?" (why so rude?)

And then pass on.

They are usually very embarassed to be caught out like that.

That is way too polite. "thammai mai soo paap"

It is very important for me to be "true to myself".

My wife used to be insulted, usually by motorcycle drivers in Bangkok, and I rarely let it go.

I can't let this behavior go. And never been in a fight for over 13 years because of it.

Often, I'll go up to the person and ask to repeat what they said as I thought I misheard it.

Pretty much exactly what I do as well. I don't take crap from others particularly well.

Walk up to them very calmly, with no hint of aggression, maybe even a disarming smile.

Get up very close and ask them in Thai "maybe I misunderstood what you said. What did you say?"

Every time they will shrink in stature, usually mumble something else and try to smile, all the while looking around at their friends, who usually look away or walk away.

Hold their gaze for a few long seconds, then just walk away, with a big shit eating grin on your face.

Never escalated, and never had issues at a later date.

[willyumiii]

You have no right to react to anything you can not understand!

Looking for conflict?

Pay your dues and learn the language if you want to be offended.

Was it the volume or tone of his voice you did not like?

I think content should be your only concern.

Lighten up and move on!

[Suradit69]

Gee one more thread attempting to deal with the problem of farang loss of face.

Amazing how the farang who are in a perpetual snip worrying about how foolish they appear to amused onlookers, are the same people who seem to think loss of face is a Thai or Asian problem. Keep in mind when you throw a tantrum in public this is what you look like. If you set yourself up as a pompous twit, they'll definitely enjoy watching you go red in the face and start squealing.

Do you know who I am? I'm a farang! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

[neverdie]

It's best to catch loudmouths off guard with a simple question like: "tummai marayat baeb nee? krai sorn?"

It's extremely humiliating but it shuts them up and focuses the attention of bystanders onto his poor manners and upbringing.

That question boils down to: "Did your parents not teach you manners?" ... The implication here is that he's a thug from a low-class family.

That would be, "Why are your manners like this. Who taught?".

The correct phrase to include the parents element would be, Por, mare, mai sorn marayat rhuu ngai khrub? (Didn't your mum and dad teach you any manners?).

I would definitely not say either of these things to a Thai, unless you want your head kicked in.

I couldn't agree with you more. I would be very careful about bringing mum and dad into anything. I've seen Thais go from fairly calm to completely irate when words like that are used.

[joshstiles]

Why do you give a damn what a thai man thinks or says? You know he is an ignorant dumbass with no future....why lower yourself to his standard....or have you already?

[arminbkk]

From the OP: “…..one of the market sellers started talking loudly directly at me about a girl friend of mine. I'm not sure what exactly he said, but it he was speaking extremely loudly and wanting to be heard by everyone and talking about my personal life and this girl.”

So OP, you do know that he was talking about a girl friend of yours and your personal life (very broad), but you don’t know what exactly he was saying?

OP, why don’t you also tell what body language he had while saying all that stuff, what was the expression on his face? Was he smiling or looking angry?

I usually ignore if something like the OP describes happens. Firstly because I can never be absolutely sure about what is said. Secondly, if I would go in, it would be a no-win already. I am not concerned about the argument or even a possible fight. I am concerned about the aftermath. Choice between ignoring something or being unpleasantly occupied for the next hour.

Of course, the way something is said and the body language and facial expression with it, will usually tell if what is said is positive or negative.

Usually I will just think something like ‘you are just a short, dark, ugly, poor, deadbeat, go nowhere loser stuck in a shitty life etc etc, I will give you these few seconds of perceived superiority’.

If I do choose to respond, I will come closer and just smile and say “(pood) arai khrap”. And then the reply is often “mai mee arai khrap”.

[Strangebrew]

Take the high road smile and move on. something like that happened to me in Pattaya A Mauy Thai boxer in a ring in the bar said something about my Mom who passed away a few years before. I walked in to bar up to his trainer and asked If I may get in ring with his fighter. He said yes I get in ring And bowed to him as is expected. Then put my size 13 in his face knocking him out cold. Went to the ropes stepped out of ring bowed to his trainer and told him when he wakes up tell him he owes me the cost of a massage And I will be back to collect. And walked out of bar. Manager was shocked but told him 7th degree black belt in Kung <deleted>.

[SoiBiker]

Wow. Did none of you get taught about 'sticks and stones...'?

It's concerning that there are so many highly-strung types walking around ready to explode at the slightest perceived provocation.

[SoiBiker]

Take the high road smile and move on. something like that happened to me in Pattaya A Mauy Thai boxer in a ring in the bar said something about my Mom who passed away a few years before. I walked in to bar up to his trainer and asked If I may get in ring with his fighter. He said yes I get in ring And bowed to him as is expected. Then put my size 13 in his face knocking him out cold. Went to the ropes stepped out of ring bowed to his trainer and told him when he wakes up tell him he owes me the cost of a massage And I will be back to collect. And walked out of bar. Manager was shocked but told him 7th degree black belt in Kung <deleted>.

And then you woke up, right?

[DLock]

Take the high road smile and move on. something like that happened to me in Pattaya A Mauy Thai boxer in a ring in the bar said something about my Mom who passed away a few years before. I walked in to bar up to his trainer and asked If I may get in ring with his fighter. He said yes I get in ring And bowed to him as is expected. Then put my size 13 in his face knocking him out cold. Went to the ropes stepped out of ring bowed to his trainer and told him when he wakes up tell him he owes me the cost of a massage And I will be back to collect. And walked out of bar. Manager was shocked but told him 7th degree black belt in Kung <deleted>.

No it didn't.

[babyjesus]

Duplicate post

Edited May 22, 2014 by babyjesus

[babyjesus]

+1

Considering that OP has no clue what was said, which OP confirmed, what is the point of this thread?

OP had an unpleasant experience and wishes to share it. You need not know a language to sense hostility or aggression.

What is the point of posts that ask 'what is the point?' If you cannot find a point in a thread, what is the point on commenting?

Would it not be best, and within theespirit of the forum- for- all philosophy, instead of trying to diminish the OP, to simply refrain from comment?

+1 :-)

[neverdie]

Take the high road smile and move on. something like that happened to me in Pattaya A Mauy Thai boxer in a ring in the bar said something about my Mom who passed away a few years before. I walked in to bar up to his trainer and asked If I may get in ring with his fighter. He said yes I get in ring And bowed to him as is expected. Then put my size 13 in his face knocking him out cold. Went to the ropes stepped out of ring bowed to his trainer and told him when he wakes up tell him he owes me the cost of a massage And I will be back to collect. And walked out of bar. Manager was shocked but told him 7th degree black belt in Kung <deleted>.

And then you woke up, right?

555555. and when he woke up his hand was ?

[Banzai99]

Considering that OP has no clue what was said, which OP confirmed, what is the point of this thread?

The Thai bashing opportunities ?

[FritsSikkink]

After 7 years you should be able to speak Thai, then you would have known what has been said.

So , go to school and learn some, you won't feel stupid again..

Edited May 22, 2014 by FritsSikkink