What New Skills Have You Acquired In Thailand?

[eldragon]

sorry cant think of any skills that can be acquired here and not anywhere cell in the world nothing of any meaning or use

what do you have in mind just in case i am missing the point

draftvader gets it.

Aaaaah, another Thai-bashing thread, masquerading as a question. You're acquiring a reputation, eldragon, that of a serial basher.

Really? I'm usually pretty careful to make objective statements. "Many Thais" vs "Thais." Etc. But thanks for the heads up.

In all honesty, I was thinking about stuff along the lines of washing clothing by hand. But draftvader cracked me up. Sorry.

I don't think equivocating makes a statement objective. It increases the chances of it being correct in the sense that the vast majority of unqualified statements are false, but does nothing for objectivity. Really it makes it more subjective, as we are free to come up with our own definition of "many" to influence the validity of the statement.

Fair enough. I guess I'm really just trying to communicate "not all". And when I say things like "Thais think differently," I really mean just that. I'm not saying all Thais are stupid or shady or anything like that. Thais have different values. They're a little more tolerant of people's shit lines. Etc. I should probably reign it in a bit though.

stop apologizing to the PC brigade, there is nothing wrong with being you,who cares what anyone thinks,anyway the OP asked for a set of humorous posts with the question alone

Thanks for that. I just don't want to be misunderstood. And I don't want any enemies in the LOS. Although, I definitely feel like some people are too sensitive to written comments on the Internet. If we said some of the same things sitting next to each other on bar stools it'd be followed by a healthy discussion and a hearty cheers.

[eldragon]

Ok sure, I can play this game. What new skills have I acquired in Thailand?

I can now spot a deadbeat, lowlife, good-for-nothing farang just from the constant negativity and irrational hatred of Thailand in nearly all of their posts.

A useful skill, actually.

I bet u cant!!

Seriously Mr Berkshire, although the way you stick up for Thai people is very admirable, I would think my admiration for Thailand, and the Thai people is well known on this forum, as I always go on about most Thai people being decent and honest, but surely you must see that there is a lot of low intelligence among a lot of them.

Thailand, like other countries has it's positives and negatives, but the positives far outweigh the negatives here, compared to the UK, although I don't know about the US, and I always call things as I see them.

Agreed. I think it should be assumed most of us like a majority of the Thais we encounter and generally enjoy living here, but often come to TV to discuss some of the more frustrating aspects of life abroad. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with calling things like they are. There's loads of things a foreigner living in the UK, US, etc. wouldn't like about the natives. And many of those things would be substantiated. (Heck, I don't like a lot of things about the masses back home...)

[NoshowJones]

Dodging bullets, cars, buses, planes, jet skis, trains, and tuk-tuks.

That is pretty much more than the skills that superman possesses.

Can't you fly?

[smotherb]

I can indicate the location of car keys using only my lips.

You can learn that in the Philippines

[elgenon]

...to understand that some words have a different meaning here,such as:

electrician,

professional,

manager,

etc.

Engineer , Its equivalent to a two year technician in any Western country.

In the States a "trash collecter" is a "sanitary engineer". 5555

[NoshowJones]

The ability to convince girls to have a one night stand

If a big fat ugly Farang can do it, anyone can, it does not even take a lot of money.

[Strangebrew]

Today i learned how to get a tough beefsteak more tender. I had been studying that for a while, the magic trick is in a bottle called "meat tenderizer" from Mc Cormick.

Next time, try adding a piece of raw green papaya and see the result.

Ghanjah (cannabis) is a meat tenderizer they say - never tried it myself, though.

Only if you smoke it then after you do does it really matter?

[smotherb]

Today i learned how to get a tough beefsteak more tender. I had been studying that for a while, the magic trick is in a bottle called "meat tenderizer" from Mc Cormick.

Place the meat in a ripe papaya slush bath for 3 to 4 hours; season it with garlic, salt, and pepper. It does wonders for tenderizing the meat and adds a clean fruity taste to the seasoning.

No, I did not learn that in Thailand.

[smotherb]

The ability to convince girls to have a one night stand

If a big fat ugly Farang can do it, anyone can, it does not even take a lot of money.

Oh, now it's bashing big fat ugly farangs, is it? You can bash farangs and convince girls elsewhere; some places farangs deserve more bashing and girls can be convinced for less.

[longstebe]

Opening a coconut.

A skill that will get me far in life.

[NoshowJones]

The ability to convince girls to have a one night stand

If a big fat ugly Farang can do it, anyone can, it does not even take a lot of money.

Oh, now it's bashing big fat ugly farangs, is it? You can bash farangs and convince girls elsewhere; some places farangs deserve more bashing and girls can be convinced for less.

What's wrong with bashing big fat ugly Farangs? That is what they are and although there are exceptions, if they let themselves get that way, by drinking pint after pint all day, deliberately disfiguring themselves with Tattoos, then they are open to ridicule.

[sendbaht]

How to run red light and not look in my rear view mirror.

Sleep with dogs barking....

[thaiguzzi]

Fixing split garden type water hose with cuttings of moped inner tubes wrapped around the split. Even every 2-3 meters. And it works...

[smotherb]

The ability to convince girls to have a one night stand

If a big fat ugly Farang can do it, anyone can, it does not even take a lot of money.

Oh, now it's bashing big fat ugly farangs, is it? You can bash farangs and convince girls elsewhere; some places farangs deserve more bashing and girls can be convinced for less.

What's wrong with bashing big fat ugly Farangs? That is what they are and although there are exceptions, if they let themselves get that way, by drinking pint after pint all day, deliberately disfiguring themselves with Tattoos, then they are open to ridicule.

Now it's tatoos, good lord, what will it be next . . . red heads?

[NoshowJones]

Not readheads smotherb, facial hair, answer this post and I'll give you something else.

[balo]

I learned how to smile in a fake way in LOFS , The Land of Fake Smiles.

.

[off road pat]

I learned a few things,.....one of them is,..If you want something precise.... get it yourself, don't trust anybody ells to get or do it for you......!!!!

And that goes for every other place in the world,....!!!

Don't be prejudiced,.....!!!......I had some pleasant surprises meeting people i taught different of before,....and learning to really know them....

I have one example of many,...A guy I knew was full of tattoos all over his body, and I taught not to high of him,...wen I started to really know him,.. he turned out tho be a really bright and extremely funny guy.....

living partially in Thailand has teched me many things,.....and I think I became a better man, still working on it dough....!!!!

And I get Lots of help from my wonderful wife.....

One other thing,....witch has nothing to do with learned skills,...I met the woman of my life in Thailand...and I will be for ever grateful to the land of smiles......!!!!

One more thing,..to my surprise, I find that Thais can be very generous......!!!

Edited November 9, 2014 by off road pat

[louse1953]

I learned that looking good (and wealthy) is what it's all about in Thailand. You will really see a different Thailand if you do your best to look good and wealthy. It's all about show.

This is totally against my nature though but i do my best (sometimes). I still want to test it with a very big fat (fake) golden chain around my neck.

I go the other way,dress down,just a pair of shorts at home.Obviosly mai me s'tang.

[atyclb]

ive become a very good shot with the bum gun too,,,lol

not so difficult, any assxhole could do it.

[atyclb]

The ability to convince girls to have a one night stand

If a big fat ugly Farang can do it, anyone can, it does not even take a lot of money.

yes depends on quality of girls also or lack thereof

[liddelljohn]

Becoming a Sourcerer (PaMot)

very handy for making Thais ,very respectful even fearful certainly very wary of me when they become rude, aggressive, or nasty ,,,, they are so credulous and supertitious that anything they dont understand but looks right is very powerful karma ,,i have developed some convincing rituals and Chants to cast out demons,bring peace,heal psychological issues , destroy other Pamots or Maemots power over , decent people ,,and protect myself ,

once I was successful the thais tend to talk and gossip and that creates a reputation ,, crazy thing is all i do is mumbo jumbo but they even come to me for help and advice now ,, most of what i tell the good people is common sense ,,my wife and her family , most of her friends and aqaintances , co workers etc are all spout out about farang pa mot, en our local Wat's abbot has asked for my advice on a coupl e of matters ....

i think the thais are susceptable to mass hysteria and thats what makes the so credulous especially of the unknown .

i never use this knowledge for my own ends only to keep safe and help others ,

2 years ago for instance there was a woman in Naklua who hypnotising a lot of thai people and ripping them off and causing a lot of psychological trauma to he victims ,, 2 of my wifes sisters and several of her friends were victims of this supposed witch and her thug son ,, i went to he business and conducted some rituals in old welsh and hebrew wiuths some nordic runes and egyptian Glyphs and also some pyros and incensce and my wife and some of her victims as witnesses , the woman and her son wer speechless with uncertainty and visible fear ,, within days the witch was very ill and so was her son ,, both ended up in a mental hospital ,,,all the victims immediately felt ''cured '' of her ''spells'' the witches business failed she lost her house and car both repossed eventually by the banks ,,my wife got a lot a face from having such an unusual Farang husband ,, every body happy happy except for the bad guys ,, may be they will be better people in the future ???

good result all round methinks .

[kinmaew]

letting it build up for longer before release

[opalred]

to say no

[RT85]

Tolerance... and eventually Acceptance..

they may not always have the best planning or systems..

however.. occassionally i see things from their POV...

they never lose sight of what's important... family and being happy..

are most locals paid too low to be bothered taking their jobs seriously?

or.. are they paid low because they don't take their jobs seriously?

it's a chicken or egg first kinda thing..

Edited November 9, 2014 by RT85

[Fatty123]

Doing a degree in Education in England as I tried tefling in LOS, enjoyed it (found I had a bit of a knack for it, even if I say so myself) and wanted to take it further. So thanks, LOS.

I also learned to ride a motorboke (Honda wave 125 of course).

[Derek J M]

How to magically turn a bucket of water and a sauce pan into a refreshing shower!

[A1Str8]

The art of fake smile.

[soalbundy]

I can listen to my wife without taking in a single word

[JingerBen]

Watching a worker as I plan how to do it better as soon as they leave?

The run-of-the-mill tradesmen here in Thailand do indeed leave a lot to be desired - some don't even have their own tools.

However, for people who are prepared to pay a decent daily wage it is possible to employ craftsmen in the building trades who are world class.

Look at what they build; the ban settees in urban areas, the the beautiful wood houses upcountry, the 5-star hotels, the posh condos, etc., etc., etc.

These places are built by Thais. The Burmese, Lao, and Cambodians are just the labourers. It's not like in many western countries where skilled immigrants have largely taken over construction work, and the indigenous white Anglo-Saxons have been marginalized in their own countries.

There are only two reasons for being unable to get competent workers in Thailand... A. You are a clueless farang who doesn't know to operate here. Or B. You are unwilling to pay these skilled workers a living wage.

Edited November 10, 2014 by JingerBen

[smotherb]

Not readheads smotherb, facial hair, answer this post and I'll give you something else.

Well, I am relieved you have nothing against people who read? So, let's see, you are against fat, ugly, tatoos, and facial hair. What, pray tell, else offends you?

Sorry, I forgot, you also mentioned farangs, or would a fat ugly Thai with tatoos and facial hair suffice?

Edited November 10, 2014 by smotherb