Sinsod or Dowry.. why the big deal ?

[Tomtomtom69]

"little envelopes will make much or all of it back."

in your dreams.....

Why are you laughing?

Let's say the sinsod or dowry is 1 million Baht. You have 200 guests that each bring give an average of say 1500 Baht. OK that's only 300,000 Baht, but some people are more generous than others. Overall, however, the idea behind the little envelopes is to pay for the wedding not so much the sinsod. Anyone who shows up giving less than about 1000 Baht (or certainly less than 500 Baht) is a cheap ass.

Edited November 30, 2014 by Tomtomtom69

[brewsterbudgen]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

[inbangkok]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

[brewsterbudgen]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

Fair enough. But many still like to keep and respect old traditions.

[benalibina]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

There is a big chance though....that after explaining how things are ridiculously done in your country....the reply would be.....whatever !

[inbangkok]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

There is a big chance though....that after explaining how things are ridiculously done in your country....the reply would be.....whatever !

Well, than that says a lot about the women you are considering marrying........

[inbangkok]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

Fair enough. But many still like to keep and respect old traditions.

Fine, I don't care if guys want to hand over a wad of cash to the parents of the girl they intend on marrying. I really don't.... Does not concern me at all. I was simply offering a suggestion for people who do not want to partake in this ridiculously stupid "tradition" of buying a wife.

[benalibina]

There is a big chance though....that after explaining how things are ridiculously done in your country....the reply would be.....whatever !

Well, than that says a lot about the women you are considering marrying........

Yes all the hiso, well educated, middle to upper class women from very well to do families were already taken.

My bad !

[AlexRRR]

Here we go again....its a problem if you think it is....out dated custom? i think so, and its Thai and farang blending so why 100% the Thai way?

As for Thai men paying 1 million...hmmmm some will some wont some never earn that much in 20 years, most of the Thai women i know lived with there Thai bfs, some even started a family with them and these are university educated women....

I wouldnt get married especialy when you know how easy it is to end a relationship, with property laws and sin sod in Thailand the cards are not in the "farangs" favor.

[brewsterbudgen]

Fine, I don't care if guys want to hand over a wad of cash to the parents of the girl they intend on marrying. I really don't.... Does not concern me at all. I was simply offering a suggestion for people who do not want to partake in this ridiculously stupid "tradition" of buying a wife.

Well, obviously if you see it like that, you'd be crazy to participate in it. But some people who marry Thais respect the traditions they are marrying into.

[crickets]

If u love her u will pay it.

[inbangkok]

If u love her u will pay it.

I pray this is a joke.....

[crickets]

Once u let go of your predispositons of sin sod u move on. I couldnt ask for a better wife. 200k is jack shit to me nyway. Have a beautiful young girl on a very good salay who is drop dead gorgeous. If u are too tight to part with that kinda money u arent gonna find ny decent women.

[inbangkok]

Once u let go of your predispositons of sin sod u move on. I couldnt ask for a better wife. 200k is jack shit to me nyway. Have a beautiful young girl on a very good salay who is drop dead gorgeous. If u are too tight to part with that kinda money u arent gonna find ny decent women.

Lol.... These types of posts are hilarious. So you bought a young gorgeous girl for 200,000. Congratulations!

I am far more impressed when individuals find "drop dead gorgeous" women to become their wife when money isn't involved.

And make no mistake buddy..... Maybe YOU can't find a decent women without spending money...... But plenty of us can.

To claim one can't find a decent girl unless they spend money on her..... Well... That would imply the girl in question is a hooker/gold digger..... And the man in question is a straight loser with nothing to offer but money....

Edited November 30, 2014 by inbangkok

[rgs2001uk]

Who dont want money? My answer is maybe animal.

I appreciate your previous reply to my question about repaying sinsot. In my case, there was little point to pursue the money through the Courts because I would (maybe) win an unenforceable judgement. You cannot get blood something out of a stone...

But now to your comment "Who don't want money? My answer is maybe animal", which I cannot ignore.

Does a monk want money?

Will money make you happy?

Those who claim that everyone wants money are typically the people who have never been rich.

IMHO, the desire for money is often motivated by selfish greed and the desire to impress (big face syndrome).

Is this what they call "Thainess"?

very simple answer:

Monks in thailand need money. Everyone in Thailand known.

Money not just made me happy but can make the people who I wanna help happy too.

Rich people even need more and more money. But they just pretend they had enaugh.

About Thais people we had different class cant compare, not all good,not all bad.

Next questions?

:-)

About Thais people we had different class cant compare,

Thats why Somboon the local motocy driver aint paying 500k for Little Lek and her three kids, her drunk lao kao drinking father and her gambling mother with their gov't land up country.

Never mind the farang mug will try to embrace his "Thainess" curry favour with the locals and build his farang mansion upcountry, all to give some LoSo some face in her back of beyond village.

I dont see my middle class Thai friends beating a path upcountry on the HW # 24 to snap up these unemployable girls with their baggage in tow.

Mai pen rai, farang mai reu ruang.

As was told to me in Bkk, "only a low class person would marry a low class person"

Dont weigh 300 lbs, aint a geriatric, not interested in a farmers daughter, some of us have options.

Dont see too many fat knacker geriatric farangs with a HiSo from Thong Lor on their arm.

Kor atibai noi.

[brewsterbudgen]

Who dont want money? My answer is maybe animal.

I appreciate your previous reply to my question about repaying sinsot. In my case, there was little point to pursue the money through the Courts because I would (maybe) win an unenforceable judgement. You cannot get blood something out of a stone...

But now to your comment "Who don't want money? My answer is maybe animal", which I cannot ignore.

Does a monk want money?

Will money make you happy?

Those who claim that everyone wants money are typically the people who have never been rich.

IMHO, the desire for money is often motivated by selfish greed and the desire to impress (big face syndrome).

Is this what they call "Thainess"?

very simple answer:

Monks in thailand need money. Everyone in Thailand known.

Money not just made me happy but can make the people who I wanna help happy too.

Rich people even need more and more money. But they just pretend they had enaugh.

About Thais people we had different class cant compare, not all good,not all bad.

Next questions?

:-)

About Thais people we had different class cant compare,

Thats why Somboon the local motocy driver aint paying 500k for Little Lek and her three kids, her drunk lao kao drinking father and her gambling mother with their gov't land up country.

Never mind the farang mug will try to embrace his "Thainess" curry favour with the locals and build his farang mansion upcountry, all to give some LoSo some face in her back of beyond village.

I dont see my middle class Thai friends beating a path upcountry on the HW # 24 to snap up these unemployable girls with their baggage in tow.

Mai pen rai, farang mai reu ruang.

As was told to me in Bkk, "only a low class person would marry a low class person"

Dont weigh 300 lbs, aint a geriatric, not interested in a farmers daughter, some of us have options.

Dont see too many fat knacker geriatric farangs with a HiSo from Thong Lor on their arm.

Kor atibai noi.

I couldn't give a shit what stuck-up middle class Thais think and I certainly don't need their approval.

[Aussieroaming]

When we got married my dear mum in law inherited all of those envelopes.

[rgs2001uk]

Post # 76.

Great stuff.

Coming from a TEFLr its doubtful you would ever get their approval.

[brewsterbudgen]

Post # 76.

Great stuff.

Coming from a TEFLr its doubtful you would ever get their approval.

My hi-so students love me and have no idea about my contempt for them and their bigotry. I hide it well! Edited November 30, 2014 by brewsterbudgen

[rgs2001uk]

Post # 76.

Great stuff.

Coming from a TEFLr its doubtful you would ever get their approval.

My hi-so students love me and have no idea about my contempt for them and their bigotry. I hide it well!

Good man, same same but different, up here in my HiSo wanabee part of Bkk, I have to laugh at them.

[otocheater]

Farangs above Ma-No-maak. Pai non dee gua.Zzz

:-)

[NeverSure]

Any woman who is for sale isn't worth having. Some are in bars and some are under the control of another mamasan called her mother.

Frankly I can't see the difference. It's still buying a woman.

If Thais had any sense of decency they'd stop selling their daughters whether it be to Pattaya or to just one man.

When will farangs wake up and realize that if they have to pay sin sod followed by a monthly stipend to the parents, pay for a big wedding and probably build a house and buy a scooter it's all about the money?

[thaibeachlovers]

It's just a scam perpetuated on the unwary. Been married twice here, never been asked to pay money.

Does your wife sending money to her parents? If so, that is another form of sin sort you pay.

If my wife sends money to her family, it comes from the money she earns, not me. Why would I pay her family?

So her money is her money and your money is her money? Good for her. You guys don't combine money? Do you pay the bills, rent, insurances, utilities, household expenses, vacations, entertainment, etc?

In my opinion, the money she earned is the money for your family (you and her). The money that can be used in your family. If she sends money to her parents, it is your money also.

Almost all Thai man cannot get away with shacked up with the girl without paying something to the girl's parents. Please go ask your Thai wife/girlfriend if you were to be a Thai man, would her parents allow her to playhouse with you and not pay anything.

Just because you are a western man, does not mean you don't have to follow the norm. As I said, some parents don't ask for sin sort up front because they know that their daughter will send them money or help them later on when they need help.

Not that it's any of your business, I pay the living expenses and for trips etc, because what she makes is so little that I wouldn't like the lifestyle I'd be forced to live if we paid half each.

However, I didn't marry her family and if she wants to give them money, that's her responsibility, not mine, and don't give me any of that "if you marry a Thai you marry their family" hokum. I discussed all that with her before getting married and she accepted my terms, so if she don't like it- her problem.

Almost all Thai man cannot get away with shacked up with the girl without paying something to the girl's parents

Gee, if that's what she wanted, she should have married a Thai man. Oh, I forgot, she did, and he didn't give anything to her family. Also, he used her money to go drinking and was a general waste of space, so she divorced him.

[thaibeachlovers]

It's just a scam perpetuated on the unwary. Been married twice here, never been asked to pay money.

Does your wife sending money to her parents? If so, that is another form of sin sort you pay.

If my wife sends money to her family, it comes from the money she earns, not me. Why would I pay her family?

Because they're your in-laws and you love them?

If you were married to a western woman and you loved your in laws, would you give them money? If not, why not?

If you don't love your Thai in laws, does that make it OK to not pay them?

[thaibeachlovers]

There is a very, very simple way to handle BS like this........just tell her in Western culture it is up to the brides family to pay for the wedding......and you want a HUGE wedding!

But you're marrying a Thai girl in Thailand and unless you're marrying into money it would be rather pointless expecting your bride's family to pay. But you know that, don't you?

Lol... Of course I know that. It is a way to show that we have stupid traditions in the West also. Expecting the brides family to pay for the wedding is ridiculous.... Just as ridiculous as sin sod. It is a way of illustrating that just because something is "tradition" does not mean it isn't stupid and needs to be done.

And as for your statement about "marrying a Thai girl"..... Yeah, and in my case, she would be marrying an American man. She needs to respect my culture and background just like I would need to respect hers. Sometimes the best way of doing this is explaining how stupid something in your own culture is, and then explain how you would never ask her to subscribe to it...... Therefore there are certain things you can not subscribe to in her culture and a compromise needs to be made.

Fair enough. But many still like to keep and respect old traditions.

Fair enough. Buy your wife if you wish, pay the family if you wish, but don't expect everyone else to do so. Whatever makes you happy.

[spidermike007]

50,000 is typical for a thai man. 100,000 is fine for a foreigner. Up to 300,000 if she is from a serious family. Any more than that is all smoke and mirrors, based on what she has heard and the workings of another fareng fool.

[thaibeachlovers]

Wow, I'm so glad I didn't believe all the pro dowry guff when I married my wife. I'd have been down a lot of money if I had done so.

[Aussie777]

All depends on the type of crowd you roll with I guess. I paid $1.5M in cash, with 20 Baht in gold. Got it all back a few days later, less 180k for the ceremony expenses, which catered for almost 300 people.

My wife's family are not wealthy, but are more than reasonable and have never asked me for a cent.

Sometimes you win, sometimes not....

[Ace of Pop]

Long time ago when i got married here. First time i heard of it was when ferangs started to arrive.Just as well, ide never pay it. Later asked Chinese FIL about it,just got told Not Your Culture,rather snappy he was too i recall.....,basically stuff your money.Rare by Thai Ways.

[laislica]

Hmmmm, what's yours is mine and what's mine is my own!

Share share, be relaxed and happy is the only real goal in life!

Learn to trust and let go of the control of your Ego!

I have observed many Farang men with Thai wives or girlfriends.

Some only give money on demand, never get change back and always whinge about their situation.

Others trust and give up front and they are happy, no whinging.

Funnily enough, when the wife/gf is given trust/money etc, they tend to be more responsible and give less away to Buddha/ family etc. everyone wins.....

Coins are made round to go round.

To give is better than to receive.

OK, give it to me - I'm ready LOL