Wife changed when she got back to the village

[transam]

[zoolander]

Meet the wife at a neutral location. Give back the boy to his mother. Arrange access and agree to pay for a decent school. Fees paid direct to school. Get divorced Take the bike and yourself to pattaya for some rnr.

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[steven100]

sorry to hear about your situation ....

The most sensible thing to do is arrange for her to meet and give her your son .... he needs his mother more than he needs to be lugged around the UK by his 65 yr old dad.

Sell the bike to anyone as fast as you can for whatever you can and jump on the next flight back to the UK.

If you stay it's only going to get worse .... ?

[fitzcaraldo]

obviously you cant take it in the village , but imagine how your wife feels in the uk , what a boredom , she definitely needs a big dose of thainess

as you here for forty days just play low and make her happy to show off in the village the family and her sisters

for the time remaining go to the next lotus and stack up on food and cans , learn how to cook rice if you dont know that way you will be strong enough and take care of your son the way you want without looking what the other are doing or not doing

but please no more tantrum and back in england maybe the problem has more chances will be sorted your way , but the responsability of the young boy will still be here for some years

[fitzcaraldo]

Meet the wife at a neutral location. Give back the boy to his mother. Arrange access and agree to pay for a decent school. Fees paid direct to school. Get divorced Take the bike and yourself to pattaya for some rnr.

Sent from my SM-G7102 using Tapatalk

there is nothing as a decent school in thailand for a decent fee, the public is as good , nothing replace the home caring and education

[Brit_Doggie]

Another fairytale scenario where the it only happens here i'm sorry my friend truly, try and move on and hope that a compromise can be reached if that is possible to achieve here.

[fitzcaraldo]

65 years old Plenty of cool Thai girls available for you.. Give your son back to his normal life with his mum. Go get a life,you cant make your son happy.

that is the easiest but best way

[neverdie]

Was the child born in Thailand or the UK?

He's travelling on a British passport ?

[MaeJoMTB]

Meet the wife at a neutral location. Give back the boy to his mother. Arrange access and agree to pay for a decent school. Fees paid direct to school. Get divorced Take the bike and yourself to pattaya for some rnr.

Sent from my SM-G7102 using Tapatalk

there is nothing as a decent school in thailand for a decent fee, the public is as good , nothing replace the home caring and education

ZL thinks there is a decent private school in a rural Issan village.

Never been to Issan then Zoolander?

[transam]

You can take a person out of the village, but you cannot take the village out of a person...........

[DP25]

Being confused and shocked, what are my options try to fix with the wife as she is adamant she wants to live with her family not me

Are you out of your mind? Your wife is trash, you and especially your son are better off without her. She's doesn't care about you OR your son. You owe it to your son to get him out of that situation. You owe it to yourself to have a good woman who cares about you.

Edited March 28, 2015 by DP25

[a99az]

I wonder what would happen if the husband and son did try to return home to the UK. If the son is traveling on a UK passport I don't think immigration can stop the father returning home with his son even if the mother does not want him to go. Please correct me if I am wrong.

[loppylugs1]

I wonder what would happen if the husband and son did try to return home to the UK. If the son is traveling on a UK passport I don't think immigration can stop the father returning home with his son even if the mother does not want him to go. Please correct me if I am wrong.

problem is leaving the child here and that child in time will be fit for absolutely nothing,(Thai style he could be OK) Just a useless motorcycle taxi or something like

anyway you are of an age that you will be long dead before your son reaches maturity

Edited March 28, 2015 by loppylugs1

[rgs2001uk]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

[loppylugs1]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly. Sorry for the kid,he too will realise a rock and a hard place really do exist.

Thai women are the tops at convincing words/statements for sure For me I reach for the vomit bag as soon as anything good natured or reassuring pours forth.

Yes I should not be here,nor you,but am making desperate strides to get out of this hell hole ,difficult yes and I have only 3 dogs to take

[transam]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

[loppylugs1]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

Cannot be much in the way of social services up there in Issan then

[transam]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

Cannot be much in the way of social services up there in Issan then

Expand on that............?

[roo860]

Seems to me the wife had enough of you.

Go back to her, be sincere with her and promise her you will change your attitude towards her.

A good thing also is to get a bunch of nice flowers for her.

Good Luck to you.

Do not go back crawling to her, show some backbone mate!!!! Her and family will drag you over the coals if you give in to them, you seem like a very considerate guy, your son is priority, if he stays with them, well who knows what he will turn out like. They will use him as a lever against you.

[farang000999]

people here really think a 65 year old running away to the UK with a 3 year old is a long term solution?

you realize that this is illegal and kidnapping, correct?

OP made his bed and now has to sleep in it. The village might not be ideal but the boy will not starve to death.

If OP cares for his son he needs to work hard to get back into the graces of his wife.

I am sure we are not getting the full story.

I am sure the story is not this one-sided.

I am sure OP is not a saint.

Perhaps self reflection would be helpful.

[transam]

Try Chang Draught........

[tifino]

it's always something pitifully small'n'insignificant that breaks the camels back... a photo

Thais cannot handle losing face, something I always knew, and that Thais don't like it when there attempts to bring a farang down to their level don't work.

Whenever I have been put into a spot where I am supposed to become as embarassed as they would have - put on the opposite, and openly act stupid and goofy.

Thai wife always has to shrink away, and wallow in her own embarassment at having maried such a dumb stupid whiteman.

If she farts badly - don't run or be negatively harsh and angry - hug her tightly instead (so she can't get away from the smell)

[loppylugs1]

If she farts badly - don't run or be negatively harsh and angry - hug her tightly instead (so she can't get away from the smell)

I push her back in the room she has just farted in

[samsensam]

you dont understand her mentality? to be honest i dont understand your mentality allowing her so much control and allowing her to abuse that control to the detriment of your relationship with her, your marriage, your son and your own life and finances. but that's in the past.

the marriage is finished and you would be a fool to invest any more money in it even if you feel up to investing more emotion in it.

if your son has british citizenship and you feel you can take care of him in the UK then take him there.

if he has thai citizenship then he'll be staying here. and you have to decide if you are staying or not.

[WhamBam]

Decision time for you. Can you raise your son yourself? Will you live long enough? If you do not live long enough consider what will happen to him. It seems he is the most important factor here. It is not his fault his parents are having difficulties.

Consider the hard cold facts before deciding.

And, YES. women do change when they get back to the village. Some change a little with their dress sense and demeanor, others change totally. IMHO.

[rixalex]

sorry to hear about your situation ....

The most sensible thing to do is arrange for her to meet and give her your son .... he needs his mother more than he needs to be lugged around the UK by his 65 yr old dad.

With the situation described, the last thing the boy needs is his mother.

OK, so the father is getting on a bit, but he still offers the boy ten times more than the mother can or will, not least of all love and care.

Get on a plane as fast as you can with your son and get him back to the UK. As far as the legal side of it is concerned, i'd say worry about your son first and deal with any legal consequences later. Chances are you can make them go away anyway with a bit of money. You owe it to your son to get him away from all of this.

[MaeJoMTB]

Your wife hasnt changed at all.

Her true colours were on display from the very start, for some reason known only to you, you either chose to ingnore the warning signals and red flags or were so blinded by love you couldnt see them.

This is true. Lets see 65,your child 3 not many options left. Social services in UK will be involved for sure if you have no other family,child up for adoption pretty rapidly.

Crap.............

Agree with Transam, if you have a 3yo at 65, every chance you can make it to 85 in the UK.

You'll get extra money in Child benefit and child tax credit, help with housing.

Social services should be very supportive.

You could well see the boy through university.

PS

I have a 3yo too (I'm 60), Thai mum is bonkers (as usual) but manageable, mainly because I refuse to go anywhere near her village or grasping relatives.

Edited March 28, 2015 by MaeJoMTB

[Jasun]

"she would let me have the rest of my clothes and suitcase if I let her take my son to stay here in Thailand and I go back to the UK alone"

Screw the clothes, get out of their with your kid. Tell her you'll meet up in a couple of days, call her when you get to Heathrow.

[tifino]

... a 40 day holiday, which means you must be running out of time, holiday visa'n'all...

You have Return Tickets already seeing as it is a holiday'n'all...

say your wife is coming later...

[Thongkorn]

Sorry about your predicament. Truthfully, Decide what you want and move on < she has a typical Thai mentality, They don't care, don't think and just look after their family and self's. and before the slating starts yea they are not all like this, its a clash of cultures, Think of your self and whats best, for you, hard but true,