Girl asking me to make her pregnant

[expatinbangkok]

Serious question, just posting in the Pub forum as I assume it will get moved here anyway.

So a Laotian prostitute I've been seeing for around a year (all in Thailand) recently said she wants to have a baby and raise it 100% herself, without the father in the picture, financially or otherwise. She asked me to stop using protection to achieve this.

My thoughts:

- If she's going to have a child anyway, at least this way at a minimum I could give it a western passport (or could I, without being married?)

- I don't mind continuing to provide some kind of financial support, as I currently do, but not a great deal, and I don't want to raise a child. Still, I'd be in contact with her and probably support her more than anyone else she chose for this

- She says she'd just return home to Laos if pregnant, to live with the family there, and stop freelancing. That might be a good way for her to get out of the business, and the parents would stop their constant demands she transfer money from Thailand (they're aware that she's a prostitute). She's 20 now (I'm 28) but says she started in that line of work at 15... it's caused her a huge amount of stress obviously. The other day her mother phoned 318 times asking for money. She is also starting to degrade physically from meth use, alcohol, long nights etc. If having a child could actually improve her quality of life (maybe even save it) by getting her out of that situation, maybe it's a good idea? She says she'd need very little funds to just be a stay at home Mom in Laos.

- I don't entirely trust her to not just turn around and try to extort large sums of money from me at a later point though. But if she did, there are no child support laws for that right?

- I don't trust myself to not get attached to the child emotionally - even though I don't want a child yet - and want to keep it away from her parents, which would probably be a disaster.

What would you do in this situation?

Edited August 11, 2015 by expatinbangkok

[Jip99]

If I was her I would have you checked out for STDs etc first

[expatinbangkok]

Yeah we plan to both get tested again. My last test was a year ago.

Edited August 11, 2015 by expatinbangkok

[Crazy chef 1]

Difficult to answer but do you think a child will change her lifestyle?i reckon it will get even worst,the child will get raised by her mum and she has to work even more to earn money to support them...

But if you really like her get into a real relationship with her,live with her together and bring her out of this circle...

[NickJ]

Poor kid....batting against the odds before being born. Prostitute mom and moronic biological paternal unit.

[pgrahmm]

Ever think that after being raised by the G'mother that/your child would then be trafficked/turned out at a young age by the GM for income/support?

You have NO upside here....As soon as the baby arrives the money will dry up and she'll be sent back to keep earning until she dies.....The baby might have problems from the meth/drugs/alcohol.....

You will be bled out for money while your child bears the worst possible upbringing......

What are you thinking? You're constructing a modern 3 country Greek Tragedy.....

Years back I had a Thai government employee tell me she wanted to have my baby......TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP..........TRAP

[Lissos]

C'mon, this post must be a wind up. Please tell me it is. Please!!

[pgrahmm]

Serious about this girl?

Get tested

Dry her out - everything (you too)

Cut ALL contact to her family

Cut ALL contact to her/your life style

Marry her & take her home

Educate her

After all that - you probably have a 40% chance of 5 years of success.....

You're not domesticating a kitten here....You got a drug addicted - alcoholic - uneducated - possibly STD infected long term hooker and hooker's lifestyle dependencies on your hands.....

[DLang]

Tell her that farang men impregnate women via her mouth.

And that you really want to try a lot to achieve her goal.

Edited August 11, 2015 by DLang

[expatinbangkok]

Difficult to answer but do you think a child will change her lifestyle?i reckon it will get even worst,the child will get raised by her mum and she has to work even more to earn money to support them...

But if you really like her get into a real relationship with her,live with her together and bring her out of this circle...

Definitely a possibility. What confuses me though is as far as I know her older sister isn't a prostitute, lives in Laos at home with the family and just has a normal, low paid job. Whereas the younger sister has been earning 10 - 50x the amount, for years, and sending the vast majority home. I need to do some more investigating to find out why that is.

[expatinbangkok]

Ever think that after being raised by the G'mother that/your child would then be trafficked/turned out at a young age by the GM for income/support?

You have NO upside here....As soon as the baby arrives the money will dry up and she'll be sent back to keep earning until she dies.....The baby might have problems from the meth/drugs/alcohol.....

You will be bled out for money while your child bears the worst possible upbringing......

What are you thinking? You're constructing a modern 3 country Greek Tragedy.....

Years back I had a Thai government employee tell me she wanted to have my baby......TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP TRAP..........TRAP

That's a concern yes.

Serious about this girl?

Get tested

Dry her out - everything (you too)

Cut ALL contact to her family

Cut ALL contact to her/your life style

Marry her & take her home

Educate her

After all that - you probably have a 40% chance of 5 years of success.....

You're not domesticating a kitten here....You got a drug addicted - alcoholic - uneducated - possibly STD infected long term hooker and hooker's lifestyle dependencies on your hands.....

Not serious enough to start a relationship, just care for her in general, having known her for so long. If I was that serious I'd do all those things, yes.

[Crazy chef 1]

Even if your intentions are Samaritan.. Not many chances to be successful

Sad but true...

[BKResort]

You are a lucky guy....She asked for you to agree about....

I had a girl friend asking me not to use protection in some "safe" days.....even trying to get me "distracted" sometimes...When we break up she told me that she was looking in get pregnant.....

[Berkshire]

With this and the other thread currently running (GF partying with naked farang guys), it seems the young farang guys in Thailand are having it worse than the old guys.

To answer your question, no way you should do it. Besides, as she is a prostitute, how would you even know that it was yours?

[Don Mega]

She might try and sell the childs organs to feed the meth habit.

[faraday]

Her mother phoned her 318 times in 1 day?

This is a serious post...?

C'mon, nobody can be that daft.

You're considering having unprotected sex with a drug addicted prostitute.....?

Do not do this.

[Lissos]

What would you do in this situation?

Look at it from this angle - the initial proposal came from someone with a meth and alcohol problem. Are such people on the ball with good life choices? ALready you know they don't, but for some reason the thought occurred along the way that tweaking her proposal somewhat could benefit both her and the child. Someone handed you a bag of rotten fruit and you believe a nutritional shake can be made out of that. Good hearted, but c'mon is it going to unfold in the wholesome positive way you envision?

Once it begins to become obvious that it ain't, now you are in a world of hurt. What would I do in this situation? Well I don't think there 'is' a situation you're gripped by yet, but there will be a situation if you proceed. Earlier on I assumed you were an older man for some reason, but I see you are 28. Do you want this at 28? Because I don't think there is a situation 'yet', my advice is to walk and remain a free man while you can.

Selfish? Utterly, but do you want to get tangled in a 3rd world tragedy at 28?

[marko kok prong]

What gammon,this is a post along the lines of "i lost my keys in a semi busy street'.

[starky]

Serious about this girl?

Get tested

Dry her out - everything (you too)

Cut ALL contact to her family

Cut ALL contact to her/your life style

Marry her & take her home

Educate her

After all that - you probably have a 40% chance of 5 years of success.....

You're not domesticating a kitten here....You got a drug addicted - alcoholic - uneducated - possibly STD infected long term hooker and hooker's lifestyle dependencies on your hands.....

Pull up champ where in the OP does it state she is a drug addicted alcoholic or is it just your assumption that every hooked must be?

[starky]

Serious about this girl?

Get tested

Dry her out - everything (you too)

Cut ALL contact to her family

Cut ALL contact to her/your life style

Marry her & take her home

Educate her

After all that - you probably have a 40% chance of 5 years of success.....

You're not domesticating a kitten here....You got a drug addicted - alcoholic - uneducated - possibly STD infected long term hooker and hooker's lifestyle dependencies on your hands.....

Pull up champ where in the OP does it state she is a drug addicted alcoholic or is it just your assumption that every hooked must be?[/quote

Whoops sorry I gotta start reading threads before I post... my apologies pgrahmm

As for the OP now that I have read it properly are you out of your God damn mind son

[Walter Travolta]

Sorry but the only thing you need to get tested is your brain!

Having a relationship with a prostitute is strange, banging different prostitutes is not . . .

Having a relationship with a prostitute who is on hard drugs is mind boggling

Considering having a child with said prostitute is just plain nuts!! What do you get out of it? Another fool waiting to get taken . . . .

. . . . NEXT FARANG FOOL PLEASE

[fang37]

If you do not have a Work Permit, run.

If you have a Work Permit, it is definitely an "up to you" decision.

[mikebell]

It happens to me all the time. At 72 I am a handsome man and many girls want my babies. Try as I might, in ten years I have had no success in impregnating any Thai ladies. I am wondering if it has anything to do with the vasectomy op I had when I was 35?

[fang37]

It happens to me all the time. At 72 I am a handsome man and many girls want my babies. Try as I might, in ten years I have had no success in impregnating any Thai ladies. I am wondering if it has anything to do with the vasectomy op I had when I was 35?

I had the nick too BUT I ain't tellin'.

[slipperylobster]

At least she asked you first. Most so us had no choice.

[jerojero]

If this is not a troll post, the Op is a total idiot to father a child with this woman. What is he thinking!

Edited August 12, 2015 by jerojero

[fang37]

Maybe he is thinking that he is an "in-demand" dude. "SUPER GENES".

If that is the case, no freebies. A commercial transaction is appropriate - similar to surrogacy.

[NickJ]

Most of us had no choice? so prostitutes with no condoms????...eh natural selection at work.....

[hellohello123]

Are you frigging retarded ????

[BobbyL]

This is up there in the higher echelons of stupidity. Unbelievable.