thaiduncankk Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just realized; I've been living in Chiang Mai for seven months and don't have one farang friend. They're all Thai. About a month after I arrived, a Thai friend took me to a expat bar (don't remember the name). I took one look and fled. I told my friend that if I wanted to hang out with old farts I would have stayed in the US! I know people who claim their 'friends' are Thai. If put in a position of backing you up, say in an argument, and losing 'face' with fellow Thais, I wonder just how friendly they will be then ? They would sh*t on their own family before losing 'face', so my guess is that any farang is well down the pecking order when it comes down to true friendship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weegee Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Simon....Don't linger on it too long or it may affect you to the negative.... Next time...choose much younger friends, and then you go first, and wont have to think about it.... Sure it's on your mind right now, but pick yourself up and move on.....my advice anyway... We are all at an age when we start losing mates sooner or later, that's a fact of life... Last year I lost my best friend and later mentor, from my school age days... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akentryan Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I came here in 1986 and my friends are dead or otherwise incapacitated I am 76 so it is very difficult to make new friends excluding casual gym or bar aquaintances. Thank God for an extended Thai family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nuananddon Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Wow, this must be happening all around Thailand. I live in a small Northern village and I've had a few Farang friends and now they're all gone, a couple under mysterious circumstances. One hung himself while he was super drunk, thai wife wanted him cremated the next day. Very suspicious. The other, who lived with his Thai boyfriend died in the hospital because of some type of unknown virus. Common knowledge of villagers was that the thai man had many other boyfriends. This man was very good to his friend, set him up in a business, built a very beautiful home, had a newer model pickup, and a nice bank acct. he used to stop by quite often to visit with the wife and I. The last guy died on the operating table while having heart surgery. This has been my experience so far with my friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dotpoom Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Don't have any...have loads of acquaintances who like to talk at every opportunity about what's going on in their lives without ever stopping to think it might be nice on occasion to ask me about what's going on in my own life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little mary sunshine Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Not everyone lives to be 100 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SOTIRIOS Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 ...don't underestimate the stress of being a 'visible minority'..... ...add some hostility, animosity, racism, xenophobia....on both sides of the equation....not good.... ...and if they happened to 'lose their life savings' to 'love'.....well...there you go.....how long do you expect them to live... ...that is why I wish we could be nicer to each other here at least..... ...all pretense aside....it can be a very lonely place to be.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berybert Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 It's a scary place to get sick or have an accident. I'd hate to have a serious accident and be waiting for an ambulance in Thailand. Honestly it's something I dread. The other thing is food standards. There's little to no regulation. One example is Thai peanuts and corn. The stuff grown here would never make it to the dinner table back home due to mycotoxins. Funny you mention this. 30 years ago the food standards were much the same in England as they are now in Thailand. People were far more healthy then in England than they are now. Maybe its all these fancy pesticides that stop apples getting spots whilst giving people cancer that might be to blame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikiea Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I know a guy that got into a motorbike accident. Found out he had Aids, started drinking like a fish....Went mad. Then got oral cancer. .......Went home and died. damn , the devils tri-fecta ................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
n210mp Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 "Where there is livestock, there will be deadstock" Quoted from an old Yorkshire farmer when discussing the death of a very sentimentally valued hackney mare. the same can be said of the deaths of those we are friends with, sometime,sooner or later we expect that either they or we will die, this is more true and blatantly obvious the older that we are. I have "lost" five friends in the Pattaya area in the last 5/6 years and coincidentally all due to cancer of the throat. I think think that as we get older our need for close friends seems to diminish, its almost as though we are in waiting for the first sign of that terminal symptom and even though a "depressive" myself I am not in any way depressed at the thought of my or the demise of any of my friends. Death is inevitable so why dwell on it? I think though it s very hard to meet up with genuine folk in these parts, it seems that most of the people that I meet in the supermarkets ETC in Pattaya are socially dysfunctional, well it appears that way when you consider that they seldom ever give you any eye contact. Mind you this is Pattaya and the fear of being ripped off by the ExPat community itseolf may well drive them into this apparent paranoia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SheungWan Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 With friends its a game of last man standing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 don't have many friends here, many aquatics I choose to stay on my own as most farangs here are wana be's million airs hahaha or bull shiters. no company is better than bad and boring company. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catman20 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Don't have any...have loads of acquaintances who like to talk at every opportunity about what's going on in their lives without ever stopping to think it might be nice on occasion to ask me about what's going on in my own life. a true man after my own heart. well said mate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StreetCowboy Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 He won't rest till he finds the GAUGE.I hope he is still alive and looking....All those Singing Gigs and Chang may have caught up with him.... NAH!!! I am still here, you two rascals......Still singing, shall I post my CD here for your enjoyment,,,?....... As for my tyre gauge, I had to spend my gig money on a new one, it is now attached to my belt so noo feeerk will nic it.......... OK....thats you accounted for...HERE I AM!Who else is still not accounted for? TB was asking for tips for The World Cup last night... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StreetCowboy Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Don't have any...have loads of acquaintances who like to talk at every opportunity about what's going on in their lives without ever stopping to think it might be nice on occasion to ask me about what's going on in my own life.What's happening, mate? How's it going?How are the family? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozyjon Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 And none committed suicide, how lucky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suradit69 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 (edited) How's your group of friends?? Nothing personal but I hope you're not one of them since it appears the survival rate for your acquaintances is not impressive. Edited August 31, 2015 by Suradit69 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieH Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just imagine how much lonelier it would feel without the daily banter, good and bad, provided here at Thai Visa. Everyone moans, yes, some use other forums or even start there own, that's fine, but they always seem to be here, almost everyday for many. For many life would be a little more difficult and certainly more lonely without the internet and forums like this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kannikapor88 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just realized; I've been living in Chiang Mai for seven months and don't have one farang friend. They're all Thai. About a month after I arrived, a Thai friend took me to a expat bar (don't remember the name). I took one look and fled. I told my friend that if I wanted to hang out with old farts I would have stayed in the US! I guess your "Thai friend" thought you would fit in good there ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lostoday Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just realized; I've been living in Chiang Mai for seven months and don't have one farang friend. They're all Thai. About a month after I arrived, a Thai friend took me to a expat bar (don't remember the name). I took one look and fled. I told my friend that if I wanted to hang out with old farts I would have stayed in the US! I guess your "Thai friend" thought you would fit in good there ... Thai Visa friendly banter ya right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thrilled Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 My Mom is 92 all her friends ,relatives older than her are all gone.The older you get the more people you know will die.You need to Get use to it,part of life.I was around drug people quite A bit in the 70's and 80's.I can't remember all of "associates" that I knew That are gone now,but it's a lot.Just get use to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beerzy Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 All my friends are mad alcoholics. hi Lantern, Obviously all your mad alcoholic friends are still alive and asking for a drink from you 55 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Bike accidents/alcoholism in my experience take a lot of young lives. Verysad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balo Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 It depends , if you choose friends who's sitting on the barstool all day, chances are they might end up dead a long time before you. Expats in Thailand are probably not worse than people living in the western world . Most of the people I know seem to take care of their body and are still alive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Now or Never Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 I came here to die. This sounds normal to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tookwan cottage Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Sorry to hear about your friends dropping like flies all around you. This must be scary! However, alcohol is the biggest killer to expats in LOS in addition to fatal traffic accidents. Two expats died recently in our community here. The first (61) had intestinal cancer and the second one (53) drank himself to death. Thank you for this balanced account—alcohol would also be the major killer on a global basis. But yet, currently illicit drugs are always demonized on this forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fabricus Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Just imagine how much lonelier it would feel without the daily banter, good and bad, provided here at Thai Visa. Everyone moans, yes, some use other forums or even start there own, that's fine, but they always seem to be here, almost everyday for many. For many life would be a little more difficult and certainly more lonely without the internet and forums like this one. That's true. I think lots of westerners here in Thailand are socially isolated and very lonely. This forum provides a sort of lifeline. What's odd is that it also provides "solace" to lonely men who don't live here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beerzy Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Sounds like those drunks don't last to Long... My Father was an abusive drunk and he lastest a long time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaybas Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 from here on in....anyone named Simon that i meet, i will walk the other way. I have been coming here now since 1996. I have not "lost" one single friend in all that time. I will admit, 2 are now alcoholics, one has cancer....but all are still alive and doing their best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ALFREDO Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 OP asks "How's your group of friends??" I do not have "friends" in TH. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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