Thai ladies mentality changed alot, and more materialistic ? I feel disappointed

[NoshowJones]

Ive found some Thai women VERY arrogant , like they really are something special, the last one was renting a room from a friend of my Wife 's and hadnt paid the rent for 2 months, I was asked to evict her, I met her i n the lift and said she hadnt paid her rent, she looked down on me and grunted as if to say , who the <deleted> are you telling me.

10 minutes later I was telling her she had 5 minutes to get her stuff out or I would be chucking them out the window, the "hi so" then became the " its not fair" sob story, i didnt give a sh*t and out she went, stuck up little cow

Is it that easy to evict people here? No legal process to go through?

If people take anything from you for a price, then do not pay as agreed, just throw them out, or take the money off their person if they have it.

Never mind legal proceedings. I hate people who try to stuff ordinary decent people in any way, and they deserve all they get.

[Colabamumbai]

Forty years a Thai girl was just happy to spend time with you, eat with you, sleep with you and when you left if you gave them $10 or 50.00 or whatever they were happy, they would spend your entire 2 weeks or 30 days here.

It is foreigners who have spoiled them, rich foreigners thinking that they had to buy love.

[jadee]

I completely agree with the OP that Thai women have become more materialistic. In fact, we share a similar timeline in that I also first came to Thailand in 2005. I blame the rise of the smartphone and social media such as YouTube, Facebook. Studies have consistently shown that Facebook can make people depressed and I'd say many people have mental or physiological issues stemming from overuse of social media.

Facebook lets people share and compare anything with anyone, hence materialism. For example, in 2005 women would have had photo albums that would only have been shared with close friends. Now they can 'friend' anyone, even someone they barely know and see every photo. Worst still, Thai women know no shame and post everything possible to show how much they have/get/do. I think this is a key difference as back home, people would have some self-restraint or awareness.

[Mot Dang]

I can't even think what will happened after 10-20 years on this way ...

I could almost write a book answering your question. I have lived in Thailand for going on 35 years. I have seen massive changes to Thai culture, and face it that is what we are talking about here. I don't want to sound like a Thai basher, because I am not. I have too much at stake. I first visited Thailand in 1980 (aged 30) and fell in love with Thailand and the Thai people. I found in the 80's Thais were very laid back, nothing worried them, they had a " it will be right mate" attitude. Then in 1984 they started the first Amazing Thailand Campaign. For me that was year zero. Thai families were very closely knit. Centuries old Thai traditions were paramount. Children were very polite, and assisted the family with chores after school such as attending vegetable gardens etc. They respected the elderly. Most Thais were poor, there was only a fraction of the middle class there is today.

The tourist industry and international trade expanded rapidly, the middle class (the "Chulalongkorn Cult") grew rapidly. Thais now had the taste for money and with that corruption was adopted as the norm. Successive governments obsessed with personal advantage took over, the people (in the Issan and southern provinces) were forgotten.

Now newer generations believe only money can bring happiness. And money buys drugs. Children no longer attend to set chores, vegetables are delivered on the back of trucks. Where water was humped from the dam, it is now pumped.

I first visited Soi Cowboy in the 80's. It was fun, the girls were cheeky, but mainly honest. Hundreds of my generation met girls, married, and left for a better life. The marriages lasted (those that I know). Not now, and your description is fair.

I met a lovely girl from Issan in 1982, we married, and are still happily married.

All I can say is don't give up. Take your time. Be street smart, and very importantly learn and respect Thai ways and culture.

In fact the are two very good books called, Thai Ways and More Thai Ways, that give you clues to the Thai psych.

As a PS, your lucky, you found Thailand early in your life. In the 80's there were extremely few 20 yo guys getting around, why ?, at that age we had no money.

The first shoe dropped in 1997; 2008 was a reminder; the other shoe is due to drop, much likely sooner than later. 10 or 20 years? Optimistic I"m thinking.

I agree wholeheartedly. I was living in BKK in 1997. I watched the richest Mercedes dealer in the world, on Sukhumvit, convert his showroom to a flea market. 10 to 20 years ? My gut feeling is 5-10 years. The baht is artificially inflated, the first movements will be seen there. Then comes small business. Small business is the economy health barometer for all countries. I don't think Thailand is any different. Young Thais live for the day. They want their big TVs, their cars, nose jobs, tit jobs, masses of hi-so cosmetics. The economy tells them, SPEND. Very few young Thai (including my family), and have good jobs, save anything. They live on credit and to them Thailand is invincible. Call it as being a part of the myth of "Thainess".

[smotherb]

I read your post and for some reason I kept on reading it with an Arnold Schwarzenegger accent !!

If you are a good looking guy and are looking for a genuine Thai lady, try looking for one at the local universities or even in the shopping centers, going to bars and clubs to pick up chicks was the norm in the 1980's and will always turn up all kinds of riff raff!!

Going to bars and clubs to pick up chicks is the norm now, as it was in the '60s, and long before that, I am sure. Men seldom seek feminine comfort elsewhere. More men would be happy with their choice of women, if that were not the case. However, I don't think you need to be good looking or even wealthy to find a "genuine Thai lady." Having a personality, being able to speak the language, and making yourself accessible often helps.

I know a man who is living on a disability pension and is 40-something, bald, and rather portly--although he does have a nice smile, an infectious laugh, and speaks Thai. I've seen him at various functions accompanied by very sweet young things--he said he meets them at universities. I saw him night before last. He was with his fiancee; a recent pharmacology graduate. She was tall, light complexioned, very pretty, and spoke English almost flawlessly. I enjoyed their company for dinner and they seemed to be in-love. They left in her brand-new MG.

[Mot Dang]

There are a lot of very good postings here. Good stuff. All are varied and coming from a different angle, but most are right. Good that more falang do have their heads screwed on right.

Edited September 30, 2015 by Mot Dang

[scorecard]

just your perception in my opinion. It's true that people have more money given that the middle class has more disposable income. But not much of a change in terms of culture in my opinion. What's changed is more the trends, i.e. interest into Korean bands etc.

Do some research, easy enough, people's attitudes have changed all over the world in the last 10 years 5 years and before, especially younger people. The 'entitled / ME generation'.

There are 30 young foreigners (I guess 25 to 30 years old), mostly female, staying in my small BKK hotel, on a training course, 99% have never before been outside of their home country (all western countries).

They have no respect for anybody, they just talk over the top of whatever is going on and are shocked when they don't get instant service or answers. They stand right in the way of other guests trying to carry food from the breakfast buffet and it's obvious to anybody they are blocking the path of others, polite request to other people to pass receive no attention at all.

Perhaps 20 of them arrived in one group and got annoyed when they had to stand in line for check-in. One girl "I don't have to do this at home and I don't give copies of my passport to anybody." Another foreign regular guest tried to explain that the hotel is required by Thai law to have a copy of the passport. New guest rudely responded that it's not required in her home country so the hotel has no right...

They ask ridiculous and demanding questions to the hotel reception staff. One exxample, 'Where can I buy some size xxx dresses New York latest fashion for under US$30?". This is whilst the 2 receptionists are in the process of trying to check-in 20 guests. When the staff respond politely that they don't really know, the response is "why not, can't you do some research?"

One complained the next morning that the coffee is not to her liking and insisted that the hotel send out NOW for Starbucks for her. In reality it's very nice hill tribe coffee blend and certainly not cheap coffee.

It's pretty much the same all over the world

[Cypress Hill]

Forty years a Thai girl was just happy to spend time with you, eat with you, sleep with you and when you left if you gave them $10 or 50.00 or whatever they were happy, they would spend your entire 2 weeks or 30 days here.

It is foreigners who have spoiled them, rich foreigners thinking that they had to buy love.

Yeah! How DARE they aspire to more than a life of servitude having sex with and taking care of battered old wheezers, Bwana-bes and romantic no-hopers who couldn't pull a Christmas cracker back home let alone a decent woman.

Those bashing consumerism and materialism as if they've come from enlightened Utopias half a world away and are SO above it are either bald-faced hypocrites or morons without a clue as to how the world works beyond the most simplistic explanations.

The wealth of ALL our homelands is firmly rooted in it.

We have grown (relatively) wealthy on the back of it and yet, here a large number of us sit, running our fat jowls about the motivations of women who have to eat and try to improve their lives in a country where the cost of living has rocketed.

Unbelievable!

Edited September 30, 2015 by Cypress Hill

[Petchabun Man]

And who do you think taught them this mentality ? Us ! And it is spreading like the plague throughout Southeast Asia. Kiss paradise goodbye.

[Berkshire]

just your perception in my opinion. It's true that people have more money given that the middle class has more disposable income. But not much of a change in terms of culture in my opinion. What's changed is more the trends, i.e. interest into Korean bands etc.

Do some research, easy enough, people's attitudes have changed all over the world in the last 10 years 5 years and before, especially younger people. The 'entitled / ME generation'.

There are 30 young foreigners (I guess 25 to 30 years old), mostly female, staying in my small BKK hotel, on a training course, 99% have never before been outside of their home country (all western countries).

They have no respect for anybody, they just talk over the top of whatever is going on and are shocked when they don't get instant service or answers. They stand right in the way of other guests trying to carry food from the breakfast buffet and it's obvious to anybody they are blocking the path of others, polite request to other people to pass receive no attention at all.

Perhaps 20 of them arrived in one group and got annoyed when they had to stand in line for check-in. One girl "I don't have to do this at home and I don't give copies of my passport to anybody." Another foreign regular guest tried to explain that the hotel is required by Thai law to have a copy of the passport. New guest rudely responded that it's not required in her home country so the hotel has no right...

They ask ridiculous and demanding questions to the hotel reception staff. One exxample, 'Where can I buy some size xxx dresses New York latest fashion for under US$30?". This is whilst the 2 receptionists are in the process of trying to check-in 20 guests. When the staff respond politely that they don't really know, the response is "why not, can't you do some research?"

One complained the next morning that the coffee is not to her liking and insisted that the hotel send out NOW for Starbucks for her. In reality it's very nice hill tribe coffee blend and certainly not cheap coffee.

It's pretty much the same all over the world

Man, that's pretty bad. And this is the future of western civilization?

[bobbin]

Time to move on to greener pastures of female submission?

Saudi Arabia?

Bit of a cheap shot coming from you JT......

You know how you like dogs and then get bitten by one? You don't look at them the same way and you don't turn your back on them...

Stickman interviewed 5 Thai female university graduates for last Sunday's post. Very interesting, their take on women's role in Thai society. "We are expected to obey our man" quotes one , to the agreement of her peers....

And not that long ago that most Western marriage vows contained the phrase to "love,honour and obey", spoken only by the woman...

We older men are not cavemen but products of our culture and social conditioning. Although, if Thailand still had slave markets (abolished around 1905 I believe), I think I'd buy a couple of ladies and trade them in every 3 years...

(ducking for cover now...)

[Cats4ever]

guy in 20's who is poor is normal. guy in 30's who is poor is not. now you must compete with the two-week millionaires.

wait until you are in your 40's and cannot buy 10 houses in thailand.....they will shun you to the 20 baht fruit stand

but speaking thai will get you discount to 25 baht.

lol

Besi

I love the "two week millionaire" put down used mainly by semi ignorant (jealous) expats. I first went to Thailand in 1972 and have been many times subsequently. My thai is a bit rusty, but superior to most expats. Another thing, who only gets two weeks leave? When I was working I usually went for 4 weeks, now usually 6.

Just ease up on the name calling. Yes, my response has some of that.

[Alwyn]

Time to move on to greener pastures of female submission?

Saudi Arabia?

In principle, yes! (obviously not Saudi). The girls in South America are awesome and they haven't got the nasal, screeching voice that is popular in Thailand!

[Cypress Hill]

And who do you think taught them this mentality ? Us ! And it is spreading like the plague throughout Southeast Asia. Kiss paradise goodbye.

BS

Southeast Asia's perfectly capable of screwing up all by itself - doesn't need foreigners to teach it how

[samuibeachcomber]

Although it seems that the OP is just worrying about getting a free ride, i think his perception is right.

Not only Thailand, but the whole world is changing faster and faster, and not only because we are getting older.

People are more self-centered, i mostly blame the abuse of technology, and the bad quality of the food.

I understand about technology making people more self centred,but your comment about bad quality food? making more people self centred.

[samuibeachcomber]

just your perception in my opinion. It's true that people have more money given that the middle class has more disposable income. But not much of a change in terms of culture in my opinion. What's changed is more the trends, i.e. interest into Korean bands etc.

Do some research, easy enough, people's attitudes have changed all over the world in the last 10 years 5 years and before, especially younger people. The 'entitled / ME generation'.

There are 30 young foreigners (I guess 25 to 30 years old), mostly female, staying in my small BKK hotel, on a training course, 99% have never before been outside of their home country (all western countries).

They have no respect for anybody, they just talk over the top of whatever is going on and are shocked when they don't get instant service or answers. They stand right in the way of other guests trying to carry food from the breakfast buffet and it's obvious to anybody they are blocking the path of others, polite request to other people to pass receive no attention at all.

Perhaps 20 of them arrived in one group and got annoyed when they had to stand in line for check-in. One girl "I don't have to do this at home and I don't give copies of my passport to anybody." Another foreign regular guest tried to explain that the hotel is required by Thai law to have a copy of the passport. New guest rudely responded that it's not required in her home country so the hotel has no right...

They ask ridiculous and demanding questions to the hotel reception staff. One exxample, 'Where can I buy some size xxx dresses New York latest fashion for under US$30?". This is whilst the 2 receptionists are in the process of trying to check-in 20 guests. When the staff respond politely that they don't really know, the response is "why not, can't you do some research?"

One complained the next morning that the coffee is not to her liking and insisted that the hotel send out NOW for Starbucks for her. In reality it's very nice hill tribe coffee blend and certainly not cheap coffee.

It's pretty much the same all over the world

Man, that's pretty bad. And this is the future of western civilization?

well scorecard you are witnessing 30 years of femail rights,the femail nazi's............bolshy young western women who want to be like men...males that have come after the baby boomers have become conditioned to this to.

[kaneko86]

I am about the same age of the op and live in thailand about the same time aswell.

I must to say that my personal experience is that every year that passes it is more easy to find decent girls and also free rides.

But yes, I stopped going to discos to find girls but go there with friends or girls that I know before mostly trough approaching them in public area as shops, bank, shopping malls or through internet (yes you can use technology in your advantage too).

The average thai girl doesn t like discos anyway. They prefer to visit quiet places which are chilling (shiu shiu and sabai).

Edited September 30, 2015 by kaneko86

[Alwyn]

I think the OP is correct, things have changed but I do wonder if a lot of it is not down to us foreigners? I first settled in Thailand in 2001 and the women were lovely. They were very polite slim and lovely shiny black hair. I noticed a few girls dyeing their around about 2004 and then came the weight gains...., My mates used to say to (I was married when I first arrived in Thailand- for work) "why would anybody want to be with a fat, lazy European woman when you can be with this"? They would also marvel at western girls on holiday here back then "how do they hope to compete with the Thai girls" etc

Then things got worse, less women now 'wai' to us foreigners than before and there is, as the OP suggests, a lack of 'respect' and an internal ugliness today. I remember my Swiss mate Sam having a birthday party for his young son in Koh Samui, everybody pitched up and a great time was had by his son and by all. With the exception of his Italian mate who came with his dyed haired lady.. Sam being the host welcomed her with a 'wai'. She just totally ignored him. Totally. Thankfully Sam told her what he thought about it all and kicked her out of his home. That would have been 2005 maybe and when I first noticed the changes

[mcfish]

If you want to play with Thai girls from twenty years ago then go to Cambodia. Super friendly and not on an endless qualification campaign. Wont last for ever though

[slipperylobster]

Ive found some Thai women VERY arrogant , like they really are something special, the last one was renting a room from a friend of my Wife 's and hadnt paid the rent for 2 months, I was asked to evict her, I met her i n the lift and said she hadnt paid her rent, she looked down on me and grunted as if to say , who the <deleted> are you telling me.

10 minutes later I was telling her she had 5 minutes to get her stuff out or I would be chucking them out the window, the "hi so" then became the " its not fair" sob story, i didnt give a sh*t and out she went, stuck up little cow

Is it that easy to evict people here? No legal process to go through?

Somethings wrong with that story. It would take several notices and collection attempts. You actually sound like you broke the law....tossing things out on the street and giving short notice.

[Tchooptip]

Maybe you have just matured and see things differently. You now have a different perspective than you did when you were in your 20's.

Yes and no ...for it seems to me in "only" ten years young people changed a lot compared to each ten years before, probably/maybe? due to overuse of internet and social media, its only my modest opinion of course!

[HerbalEd]

Besides asking "I want to know if it's just my perception or it's some people thinking same as me ?, perhaps you should ask if it's you.

[HerbalEd]

I see no change in Thai women over the past ten years. In fact, I see little change over the past 35 years ... and almost all that change is good.

Anyway, that's my experience. Yours may differ.

[mauGR1]

Although it seems that the OP is just worrying about getting a free ride, i think his perception is right.

Not only Thailand, but the whole world is changing faster and faster, and not only because we are getting older.

People are more self-centered, i mostly blame the abuse of technology, and the bad quality of the food.

I understand about technology making people more self centred,but your comment about bad quality food? making more people self centred.

Well, " bad quality of the food " , referring to junk food, with too much sugar and chemicals... It could be that it has nothing to do with people becoming more self centered, but somehow i associate it with a bad methabolism, thus bad quality of thinking.

[dotpoom]

It could be said that maybe you yourself are not the "genuine article" a lady might be looking for in her life. Why do you spend so much time looking for different ladies in all these different places. That is just an observation on my part....not a personal remark.

[Broken Record]

Ive found some Thai women VERY arrogant , like they really are something special, the last one was renting a room from a friend of my Wife 's and hadnt paid the rent for 2 months, I was asked to evict her, I met her i n the lift and said she hadnt paid her rent, she looked down on me and grunted as if to say , who the <deleted> are you telling me.

10 minutes later I was telling her she had 5 minutes to get her stuff out or I would be chucking them out the window, the "hi so" then became the " its not fair" sob story, i didnt give a sh*t and out she went, stuck up little cow

Is it that easy to evict people here? No legal process to go through?

Thai landlords call on Farangs to kick Thai people out after threatening them.......I know it's true cos I read it on the internet on an anonymous forum.

same old crap from you i see

Coming from The King of Crap, I'll take that as a compliment.

[Berkshire]

I see no change in Thai women over the past ten years. In fact, I see little change over the past 35 years ... and almost all that change is good.

Anyway, that's my experience. Yours may differ.

I would tend to agree. Perhaps the OP is finding out that just being a foreigner is not enough any more. Aside from some baht, he may actually need a bit of personality.

[Thai at Heart]

So, women want wealth and security. Not sure this is exclusive to Thailand......

[Fabricus]

So, women want wealth and security. Not sure this is exclusive to Thailand......

Well that was a sensible reply.

[MaeJoMTB]

What was available free,to a slim young hansum 20 year old.

Costs money to a chubby, middle age balding 30 year old.

It's not them, it's you!